


How to Train Your Endbringer

by RavensDagger



Series: How to Train Your Endbringer - Multiverse Adventures [1]
Category: Parahumans Series - Wildbow
Genre: Comedy, Crack Played Straight, Endbringers, Fluff, Gen, Humour, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Insanity, Only Somewhat Cracky, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-19
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2019-10-31 11:48:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 35
Words: 103,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17848874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RavensDagger/pseuds/RavensDagger
Summary: In which Taylor loses her mind, Queen Administrator decides that bugs aren’t very impressive, and everyone discovers that It’s hard to escalate more than ‘ride an Endbringer into battle.’These are the first arcs Crossposted from Spacebattles.com The full story can be found there.





	1. In Which Taylor Gets a Puppy

She waded through water that reached her knees, desperately fighting to push against the swelling tide while, in the back of her mind, knowing that it was futile. The shelters were closed by now, there was nothing she could do.

Taylor choked back a sob as she tripped over something and nearly fell into the pouring waters clogging the street. When she looked down it was to see a man’s back, his head bobbing under the flow, one arm pinned between a wrecked car and a streetlight.

She looked away, then pushed on. Her hands came up to clutch at the neck of her hoodie, a desperate attempt to stop the constant rain from plunging down her front and to keep her hands from trembling. Under her breath, the girl was muttering a litany to the waterlogged city. “Almost there, almost there.”

An explosion rocked the Bay and she almost paused before thinking better of it. If she stopped for every explosion, for every bright beam of searing light, then she would be rooted in place, and if that happened she would die.

The shelter nearest Winslow was just a little ways away now, maybe a block or two, she couldn’t tell through the walls of rain coming down around her. She tried to wipe her eyes clear but it was useless, seconds later her vision was fuzzy once more and her glasses were too wet to really help.

It was supposed to be a good day. Sunday was quiet, a day when she didn’t need to go to school, where she could stay at home and relax and forget about everything. She had walked to the groceries, just to pick up a few things, to get out of the house which felt too big and too quiet when her dad wasn’t there. A bit of a walk, a couple of bags with bread and fruit and a few essentials; just a nice day with maybe a small drizzle of spring rain.

She had left the bags somewhere behind her, lost in the panic when the sirens had first started to wail.

“Stupid, I’m so stupid,” she whispered.

Another explosion, this one so close that she could feel the thrum of it in her chest, then the ground started to rock and shake, the waters around her dropping down until they barely reached her ankles and she almost tripped over the sudden loss of pressure against her legs.

Taylor looked around, wide-eyed as she took in the shops and apartments buildings around her. There were more bodies on the street and piles of detritus that had been carried by the waves.

For a moment she had hope. Maybe the heroes had done something, maybe the battle was over?

A blur of red shot past her, fast and hard enough that she felt her hair and sodden clothes shift at its passing.

There was a thump behind her.

When she turned it was to see a familiar person, crumpled against the side of a building. Velocity hacked and coughed, blood running down his chin. Her back was pressed into the brick side of a shop, a few cracks running out from where he had impacted the wall. His breathing slowed and the hero slumped.

“Velocity Deceased, EM-5,” came a crackling voice from the bracelet wrapped around the hero’s wrist.

Taylor felt her chest clamping up and her legs shook so hard she nearly fell to her knees. She wanted to scream, to sob and cry and be somewhere else. She was a girl used to fear, used to torment and being shat on. She had survived the locker and the school doing nothing, Emma’s betrayal and the almost worse way her father had grown more and more detached. But this was worse in so many ways.

“Oh god,” she whimpered.

With a rumbling like a million boulders tumbling down a hill, a wave of water ten feet tall rushed around the nearest intersection.

Taylor couldn’t find her voice, couldn’t say anything as she saw the monster riding the wave. Four green eyes locked onto her.

It was so fast, so huge, like a train coming off the rails, an unstoppable force of nature that was seconds away from wiping her off the face of the earth.

“Stop!”

The wave split.

Taylor flinched back, watching her oncoming death miss her by inches as the torrent was sliced apart like something out of the old testament.

The waters receded a little, leaving her standing in a circle three paces across, her feet on dry asphalt while water dripped down from her and puddled at her feet. Around her rose a wall of seething, always-moving water, frothing and bubbling as it spun in a tight circle only just out of arm’s reach.

Above her, four eyes stared. Taylor looked up, meeting the Endbringer’s stare though really, all she wanted to do was curl up in a ball and hide.

{New Primary Directive to Unit-02 from Host-Queen_Administrator. Query: Override Primary Directive from Host-High_Priest?}

“What?” she said, her voice lost in the churning of the waters around her.

The Endbringer, Leviathan, shifted, his bulky upper body swaying in time with his too-long arms. The voice returned, though it wasn’t a voice, it wasn’t something she heard but rather a... noise in her mind. {Unit-02, Local Designation ‘Leviathan.’ Confirming new Primary Directive from Host-Queen_Administrator. Query: Override Primary Directive from Host-High_Priest?}

Taylor Hebert was many things. She knew that she was not the brightest, she knew that she was ugly, and too tall, and the no one really liked her. But she was not a fool. She had read her mother’s books, about Faustian deals and talking to gods, and if there were gods roaming around the unfair world around her, then the creature towering above was one of them.

“W-what’s the primary directive?” she asked. There was no shame for the whimper in her voice, or her stutter. This was probably just another prank, a joke that would end with her splattered against some building.

{Host-Queen_Administrator requesting Primary Directive of Host-High_Priest. Directive as follows: ‘Challenge me.’ Directive interpretation as follows: Use abilities to destabilize local lifeform economy, ecology and social systems. Limit aggression to within survivable levels to local population.}

She shivered once the... once Leviathan finished. “That’s horrible.”

Leviathan stared and Taylor Hebert spoke with courage born of fear. “Don’t do that anymore, please? Just, stop.”

{Understood. Primary Directive Override Accepted. New Primary Directive?}

Taylor clutched her hands around her chest, eyes turning down and away from the monster. “I, I don’t--”

Beams of white-ish light slammed into Leviathan and the water around him sending great gouts of steam into the air. Taylor threw herself down and back, shielding her head with her arms until the attack subsided only to start again from another angle.

She screamed in the ground, face pressed into the wet asphalt while the world around her exploded again and again until, finally, it stopped for just a few seconds. “Girl, get out of there!” A woman’s voice called out to her.

Taylor looked up and there was a woman in an all-black suit hugging a curvy figure accentuated by red lines that ran across her costume. She was flying towards her, eyes wide in panic as she tried to reach the girl within the Endbringer’s grasp.

“Grab my hand!” the cape called.

A pillar of water tore out of the sea around Taylor and engulfed the flyer like the hand of a watery god. The water turned red a moment before the pillar was sucked back down into the teaming mass.

“Oh god,” Taylor said.

{Unit-02 requesting New Primary Directive.}

Taylor looked at Leviathan, her mouth shaped in a little ‘o.’ It was too soon to think of all the ramifications. Other capes would come, they would see her talking to him, talking to the enemy. They would hurt her and her dad, blame her for what the Endbringer had done.

That cape had just died trying to save the one person that didn’t deserve it.

“Just, leave me alo--” she started but stopped. “No, I mean.” She licked lips made salty by ocean water. “Hide. I, I need to think, s-so hide.”

{Confirming New Primary Directive for Unit-02 from Host-Queen_Administrator: remain concealed. Return to Host-Queen_Administrator for further Directives. Directive Accepted.}

And just like that Leviathan was gone. She had seen him move, barely, a blur of green and grey that sped off, skimming above the water like the world’s biggest water strider. The water around her flowed away, dropping down as it drained down the streets yet still maintained a perfect bubble or dryness around her.

Taylor stood, shivering in the middle of the street while a few capes zipped by. Some spared a glance her way, but she was just an obvious if lucky civilian, or maybe, at worse, a newly triggered parahuman. She wouldn't be the first one left in the Endbringer’s wake.

“Oh god,” Taylor said.

***

The camps set up by FEMA and the National Guard were, at the best of times, rather chaotic. The people that had been evacuated from endbringer shelters were funneled towards the nearest camp where men and women in uniform tried to keep track of everyone.

There was this air of relief, that those shambling across the ruined city were those that had survived. Sure, Brockton Bay was in ruins, but it could be rebuilt.

The camp that Taylor found herself in was right next to a crumbling supermarket. She had been assigned to a tent last night along with three dozen other girls of about her age. She never even learned their names before falling asleep on the cot within.

The next morning, she found herself a little hungry, and maybe in need of a shower, but really she couldn’t complain. Everyone was still rather quiet after yesterday’s attack. The FEMA people said that they were waiting for a delivery from Boston to arrive, that there would be more tents and supplies and things later and that they all just had to be patient.

That morning she had gone to the Wall, a huge poster board where the names of the deceased were being pinned as more bodies were found. Her dad’s name hadn’t appeared on there, yet.

And so Taylor Hebert found herself standing alone near the camp’s exit when the voice returned. {Unit-02 requesting further Directives.}

Taylor nearly jumped out of her skin and a few curious heads turned at the sound of her squeak. She had, until then, hoped that yesterday had been a fever dream, that what she thought had happened really didn’t.

“Okay, okay, calm down,” she whispered to herself. So, Leviathan was still around, but not attacking, else the sirens would go off again and there would certainly be more people panicking. Which meant that it, he, had listened to her and was probably hiding... hiding inside Brockton Bay.

“Oh shit,” she said. Looking around to make sure no one was paying attention, she walked out of the camp with brisk steps, her head down and hood up to cover her face. “Um, can you hear me?” she whispered.

{Affirmative. Unit-02 within Host-Queen_Administrator’s range.}

“W-where are you?” she said before looking around. She didn’t know what her range was, for that matter she wasn’t sure what a Queen Administrator was either except that Leviathan, or Unit 02 seemed to refer to her as such.

{Unit-02 is 727 meters east of Host-Queen_Administrator.}

Taylor searched for a few seconds, taking in the street she was on and comparing it to her mental map of the city. East was always the direction the ocean was in, so that was easy enough. Falling into a quick jog, she began to make her closer to the Endbringer. “This is so weird.”

Six blocks down and she found herself out of breath, gasping from the short run. “Are you close?”

{Unit-02 is 79 meters north-east of Host-Queen_Administrator.}

Taylor looked around, then found the broken down and waterlogged remains of an underground parking garage. She was closer to the Boardwalk now, or at least where the Boardwalk had been before Leviathan had come around.

The inside of the garage was damp and smelled of mold and rot, but it was quiet save for the gentle lapping of water. There was a ramp leading down to the floor below, but it was filled with brackish water that shone in what little light was pouring in from the entrance behind her.

The water shifted and moved, then a head as tall as she was gently rose until it was even with her. She couldn’t stop the little gasp that escaped her, the jolt of fear shooting down her spine as four green eyes took her in. Her entire life the Endbringers had been spoken of in terrified whispers, the city killers, the monsters that had destroyed entire nations and reaped countless lives. And now one of them was staring at her almost... placidly.

She wasn’t quite sure how she was associating emotions to Leviathan’s emotionless face, but she felt as though he was just... waiting for her to tell him what to do, like a well-trained puppy.

Taylor almost giggled at the mental image of Leviathan as a cute little puppy. A thirty-foot-tall puppy that could summon tsunamis. Maybe she could get him a collar? Would people react if they saw her walking the Endbringer with a leesh?

Shaking her head to clear her mind from the absurd thoughts, Taylor took to inspecting the unmoving Endbringer. Leviathan seemed content to just stand there while she took in his green-grey skin and glowing green eyes.

“So, um, hi?”

{Unit-02 greets Host-Queen_Administrator. Query: New Directives?}

Taylor’s mind went blank. Endbringers were the thing heroes fought against. What in the world was she supposed to tell it to do. Maybe she could have it walk over to the PRT and... just let them do whatever to it.

It made sense. If they could dissect Leviathan, they could find out how to get rid of the other Endbringers too... but that just felt so wrong. He hadn’t done anything bad. Well, not to her, she reasoned. He was just following directives. Was it a dog’s fault that it hurt someone if its master told it to attack?

Instead, Taylor asked a question. “Why, why are you listening to me?”

{Host-Queen_Administrator possesses Administrative Control over Unit-02.}

“How?”

{Host-Queen_Administrator is Host to Queen_Administrator.}

She blinked. Leviathan shifted. “What’s a host? Like, like a parahuman?”

{Affirmative.}

“I’m a parahuman?”

{Affirmative.}

“I’m a cape?!” Taylor barked.

{Affirmative.}

Taylor leaned against a nearby pillar, her legs feeling wobbly under her. Of course, in a way it kind of made sense. She knew about triggers, at least a bit from what she’d learned in school. She... couldn’t point to when she had gained powers, but that didn’t matter, not really. “My parahuman power is to control you?” she squeaked in near-horror.

{Host-Queen_Administrator Administrates All Units within Range. Set Directives. Host-Queen_Administrator can not take direct control.}

“So I can’t... master you?” Taylor swallowed. The idea of mastering an Endbringer was a bit much. “But I can tell you what to do?”

{Affirmative.}

“Like a dog?”

{...Affirmative.}

“I always wanted a dog,” she said to no one in particular. Her mind was, at that point, swimming through a morass of strange ideas. She slapped herself across the cheek. “Okay, okay. So, uh, you need a new directive, right?”

{Host-Queen_Administrator can assign new Directives.}

“And if I don’t?”

{Unit-02 returns to previous Primary Directive.}

“Oh shit,” Taylor whispered, imagining the Endbringer attacking the Bay while the city was filled with refugees and blocked roads. It would be a massacre made all the worse because no one was expecting it. Would all the heroes that just left come back? Worse, if she died would he revert again?

Biting her lower lip, Taylor looked up at the creature before her. “You, you have to keep me safe. And, and do that without killing anyone... unless they’re trying really kill me.” She frowned, thinking back to something she had read a while ago. “Don’t hurt anyone unless they’re about to hurt me. And you have to listen and do as I say. And... and you have to protect yourself, unless it goes against the other two things.”

Leviathan paused for just a moment before replying. {New Primary Directives as follows: Primary One: Unit-02 must secure Host-Queen_Administrator. Unit-02 must follow any secondary Directives from Host-Queen_Administrator. Primary Two: Unit-02 must refrain from causing harm to other Hosts or locals except in the act of completing Primary One. Primary Three: Unit-02 must protect itself from harm unless this violates Primary One or Primary Two.}

“Right,” Taylor agreed. It made sense. She could do this. Heck, she had dreamed of being a cape, and now she was. Oh, sure, she didn’t have a cool power like Alexandria,or even something practical like most Tinkers, but hers was still pretty good. For a moment she imagined Principal Blackwell telling her that there was nothing that could be done about the bullying while Leviathan stared at her from outside her office window.

She could work with this.

She couldn’t join the Protectorate or Wards, they would take her Leviathan away. Taylor frowned and tried to think past the pounding of blood in her head. Yeah, she had to protect her Leviathan, that made sense and it was only fair. He would protect her too.

“I’ll need a costume,” she whispered, then giggled. “You’ll need a costume too,” she told Leviathan.

She had the impression that the Endbringer shrugged, though really it only shifted a little in the water. Then her stomach growled and she realised that she was wasting time. “Uh, you’ll be safe here, right?”

{Affirmative.}

“Cool, I’ll... just go find something to eat, okay?”

{Affirmative.}

With a timid smile, Taylor backed out of the parking garage and into the street. It was rather desolate, with no one in sight. This was one of the streets housing warehouses for all the stores on the Boardwalk, it wasn’t as pretty or as accessible as the Boardwalk itself and there wasn’t anything really worth looting here. Leviathan had picked a good place to hide.

She stared to walk back towards the camp, hoping that there was something available to eat there, when she heard a loud splashing sound from right behind her and felt a few drops landing on her head.

Turning, Taylor had to look up to the Endbringer standing just a few feet behind her. She blinked up at it, then walked backwards for a half dozen steps. She wondered how something so big had moved so quietly, and quickly.

He took one step towards her, cutting the distance back down. “W-what are you doing?”

{Unit-02 following Primary Directive One.}

“You’re following me?” She looked around, making sure that there wasn’t anyone else around. “Okay, that... might be bad. Just, uh.” Her eyes alighted on a broken down warehouse, one wall crumbling apart to reveal the interior. “I have an idea.”

Ten minutes later, Taylor found herself the proud owner of an only-slightly-stolen roll of some sort of industrial canvas. It was a fairly thick material in some off-white colour with some water stains along the bottom but it would serve.

Unrolling it on the ground, Taylor began to try and tear a long piece of the material apart when a clawed hand reached over her shoulder and sliced into the canvas. “Thanks!” she said to Leviathan as she pulled at the roughly square piece of canvas. “Could you cut out another square, about this big?” she asked, making a gesture with her hands about shoulder width apart.

Finally, Taylor had two pieces of rough cloth cut into squares, one about a dozen times bigger than the other. “Okay, so, take that piece,” she pointed to the large square and waited until Leviathan grabbed it in one giant clawed hand. “Right, now tie it like this.” With a bit of fumbling, Taylor took the smaller piece and wrapped it around her lower face then tied it behind her head. When she was done, she looked up to see that the Endbringer was now wearing his makeshift bandana over the bottom of his face.

She blinked. It looked like it wanted to rob a huge bank. “This is never going to work,” she muttered, voice muffled by the halfmask. Still, she figured it would protect her identity, at the very least. And maybe people wouldn’t take Leviathan quite as seriously is he was wearing a bandana.

“Okay, so, stay here, okay?”

{Override Primary Directive One? Query: Revert to previous Primary Directive?}

Taylor blanched and any humour at seeing Leviathan with a mask on fled along with all the blood in her face. “Um, no, no, don’t do that. Just, try to be subtle? Make it so that people don’t notice you, if you can.”

{Understood.}

She stared at the unmoving Endbringer, then back along the road she had been heading down. “Okay then.” With a deep breath to centre herself. She started down the street, looking over her shoulder every so often to make sure Leviathan was still where she had left him.

Then, she made it around an intersection and calmed down a little when he didn’t follow. So far, so good, she thought before speeding up a bit. The streets were rough, with new potholes and craters torn into them where the fighting had passed. More than one building had been torn apart and debris filled the roads, but a passageway had been cleared down the middle at some point, so she stuck to the road.

A few minutes later, when she was only four blocks away from the camp, she heard the rumbling of trucks and had to step aside as a convoy of half a dozen black vans with FEMA and PRT markings on their sides rumbled past. She stared, wide-eyed at the heroes standing atop the moving trucks, recognizing Assault and Battery from the local PRT and Kid Win and Gallant from the Wards program.

Gallant waved at her as they passed, and she waved back shyly. It wasn’t every day she got to see heroes in the flesh and she was a little starstruck as the convoy moved past. Then she remembered that she was a cape now too.

With a timid smile, Taylor followed after the convoy but quickly lost them from sight. They were probably bringing supplies to the various camps anyway, so maybe she would get to meet them later.

It was as she walked down the next block that she heard the unmistakable noise of capes fighting. There were explosions and the pat-pat of Tinkertech guns firing.

Taylor paused. She should turn, and hide or go the long way around. But the idea that she could make a difference was weighing on her shoulders. Licking past dry lips, Taylor jogged forwards then slowed down at the next intersection.

Poking her head around the corner, she took in the scene with untrained eyes.

The convoy had stopped in its tracks, and the reason was plain to see. Metal swords were jutting out of the ground in the middle of the road, spikes a dozen feet tall that pointed right at the foremost truck.

In the air stood Rune and Stormtiger, the two of them riding on a cement slab while hundreds of rocks spun around the villainous cape like asteroids around a planet. Stormtiger was slashing the air with his arms and sending long gashes of compressed air out towards cowering PRT agents in full armour.

Kaiser was dodging blows from Assault, ducking and weaving out of the way while sharpened spikes of steel tore out of the ground towards the hero. Battery, meanwhile, was running towards Fenja, one of the giant twins who was even now spinning her spear around in great slicing arcs.

Gallant and Kid Win were closer to the convoy, the knight-like hero firing brilliant blasts from his hands towards a group of thugs in E88 colours. Above him, Kid Win was floating on his hoverboard and firing his twin pistols at Cricket who was narrowly avoiding every shot while running full-tilt towards Gallant.

Hookwolf was laughing as he turned into a gigantic wolf made of spinning blades and began lopping towards the wards.

Taylor took a deep breath, her brow scrunching up as she tried to think as quickly as she could. It was the sight of Gallant turning tail and running away from an enraged Hookwolf that made up her mind.

She ran out from behind cover, pulling up her hood and making sure that her bandanna covered her face as she did so. A few of the PRT people looked her way, but they were a little busy with the Empire capes and thugs to take action against a lone civilian.

Taylor stopped a few dozen meters away from the worse of the fighting and filled her lungs with air. “Stop!” she shouted.

Hookwolf laughed maniacally as he shrugged off Gallant’s desperate barrage of bolts. Fenja finally clipped Battery and sent the heroine rolling across the ground while behind the giantess, Kaiser managed to push Assault away thanks to a wall of spikes that sprouted underfoot.

“I said stop! Please.”

Rune shot a piece of concrete at the nearest truck, a chunk nearly as tall as Taylor that rammed into the side of the truck and exploded into head-sized bits of shrapnel. One of these bounced on the road, then rocketed off towards where a wide-eyed Taylor stood.

Kid Win, Rune and Stormtiger all watched the piece heading towards the rather unassuming civilian.

There was a meaty smack, and Taylor blinked at the huge hand blocking her vision and, she realized, holding the piece of concrete like she would hold a pebble. “Oh,” she said to the Endbringer standing behind her.

The fighting stopped.

Taylor bent down a little to see past Leviathan’s hand, then she pressed a hand against it and pushed up. The Endbringer complied and moved his arm out of the way, letting the concrete slab fall down as he did so.

“So, uh, I really, really wanted you guys to stop fighting, please?” Taylor said, her voice dwindling as she saw all the attention being pointed her way.

Assault was the first to react by pointing a finger towards Leviathan. “Is that... Leviathan?”

Taylor looked over her shoulder to confirm that, yes, there was a thirty foot tall Endbringer right there. “Uh, no?” she said. She realized that she might have made a mistake.

Kaiser stepped up, his form covered in interlocking plates of steel with jagged spikes jutting out everywhere. He stood tall and pointed the flat of his hand towards Taylor. “Fool girl, you think you can get away with using such illusions against the Empire? It is in bad taste!”

With a flick of his wrist he send a row of sword-like spikes running across the ground, each one growing closer and closer towards Taylor in a straight path that would, in a few seconds, impale the girl.

A nearby storm-drain exploded into the air, followed by a column of water three feet wide that shot through the ground with enough force that it started to tear through the road around the drain. The water twisted in the air, turning nearly ninety degrees in a blink.

There were a few screams of horror as the jet of water slammed into Kaiser. The villain rammed side-first into the brick facade of a store.

The water splashed onto the ground, no longer manipulated by the Endbringer only for it to form a massive puddle that more than one hero and villain shied away from.

Bits of Kaiser’s armour tumbled to the ground.

It was rather quiet until Taylor turned around and pointed at the Endbringer. “No, bad Leviathan, bad!”

{Accomplishing Primary One.} The Endbringer said as it rocked back onto its heels a little.

Taylor patted its knee, which was about as high as she could reach without stretching. “I know, I know, you just wanted to keep me safe, but try not to kill people, even if they’re Nazis, okay?”

Leviathan looked down at her, his bandanna rustling with the motion. {Affirmative.}

Taylor nodded, then paused mid-motion as she remembered her audience. “Uh, right, um... surrender, please?” she asked.

-End Part the First-  



	2. In Which Taylor Talks to the Heroes

“...Uh, right, um... surrender, please?”

About two dozen fearful looks took in the girl standing in the shadow of the monster. She was tall--though her back was hunched over as though trying to make herself small--and clothed in stained jeans and a hoodie that had seen better days. In no way was she intimidating. If anything, the young woman might have inspired pity.

Then she patted the Endbringer on the leg as if it was an obedient puppy.

A few looks were shared, all of them with the same thing: ‘you talk to her.’

Finally, in a show of bravery so often associated with heroes, Battery stood up from where she had been pushed by the giantess Fenja and took a small step towards the girl. There were protocols and training for hostage situations. The training didn’t cover what to do if you were the hostage. “Can we talk about this? Please?”

Taylor took in the heroine, in her bright blue armour and certain stance, the kind of woman she had looked up to her entire life. “Um, yeah, sure!”

The cape didn’t seem to know quite what to do with that response. “Okay, that’s good. Look, we’re all going to put our weapons down now, alright. No one has to do anything rash.”

A few of the Empire capes seemed reluctant to drop their weapons, then the mangled blob of crushed flesh that was Kaiser flopped out of the wall it had been embedded in with a wet splash. Taylor winced, then scratched the back of her head through her hoodie. “Ah, shucks. Sorry about that.”

Rune dropped her rocks and Cricket practically threw her scythes down. They were soon followed by the dozen or so bats and chains carried by the Empire thugs and the containment foam launchers the PRT soldiers held.

“See,” Battery said, her own hands held at shoulder height. “We’re all complying. So, how about we all introduce ourselves?”

“Oh, sure,” Taylor said with a quick nod. “Though, uh, I don’t have a cape name yet,” she said while gripping her right bicep with her left hand. “I guess you can call me Queen Administrator?”

There was an audible gulp from Kid Win, but Battery ignored it. “That’s a very... pretty name.”

“I thought so too,” the newly christened Queen Administrator said. “Um, wasn’t there another cape with queen in her name though?”

“You mean the fucking Fairy Queen?” Rune said just loud enough for it to carry. Battery shot her a warning look and Stormtiger grabbed the young cape’s shoulder and squeezed.

“That’s not the same, so I should be okay, right?” Taylor asked.

Battery nodded. “I can’t imagine anyone complaining.” Assault snorted, earning himself a death glare from his partner.

“Awesome. I was kind of afraid that it didn’t sound very heroic.”

“You, you want to be a hero?” Battery said, her voice tinged with the first glimmers of hope.

Taylor nodded. “Yeah. I just learned that I have powers, and I want to use them to help, you know? It, uh, might not be easy though, my powers aren’t the nicest.”

“That’s alright. I’m sure the Protectorate could help you learn how to use your powers. You could join the Wards and we could train you and help you grow into a fine hero.” Battery felt a weight lift off her chest. She had participated in a few recruitments before, and had been trained in addressing new capes with an interest in joining the Protectorate. This was familiar ground. In the back of her mind, there was a tiny voice wondering what the bonus was for recruiting a girl who treated an Endbringer like a pet.

“No,” Taylor said.

Battery felt the weight returning, only this time it was heavier and a bit angry.

“They might want to hurt...” the young would-be-heroine looked up to her companion. “My friend,” she finished rather lamely.

“You mean Leviathan?”

Queen Administrator shook her head violently from side to side, her eyes wide in panic. “No, that’s not who he is. Uh... aren’t there laws about masks and cape personas?”

Battery nodded slowly, taking in the sudden change in topic. “Yes. There are rules that most capes follow. No unmasking a cape, no attacking them in their civilian identities. You don’t have to worry. We won’t try to unmask you.”

“Right. So you won’t try to unmask my friend, uh... Nahtaivel?” she said as though trying to word for the first time. Then she frowned at the bandanna-wearing Endbringer. “Don’t you have a better name?”

{Unit-02 Designation: Unit-02 of 20. Local Designation: ‘Leviathan,’ ‘Jormungandr,’ ‘The Second,’ ‘The City Killer.’}

“I can’t go calling you ‘The City Killer,’ you’ll scare them all,” she whispered harshly. Battery, who was near enough to hear, felt the blood draining from her face. Queen Administrator turned to the gathering and nodded decisively. “You can just call him Unit Two of Twenty, but that’s a mouthful so just Unit Two, I guess. That’s what he calls himself, mostly.”

Kid Win started making a high-pitched keening noise until Gallant placed a hand on his shoulder in a show of solidarity.

“I, we,” Battery began, then she looked at the Endbringer, taking in the piece of cloth that had slid down to drape around its neck. She fixed a smile on. “S-sure why not? It’s a pleasure to meet you, Unit Two... of Twenty. I hope...” she paused, because she wasn’t sure exactly what she was hoping for. “Right, anyway. You wanted us to surrender, right? I, I don’t want to judge you, but it might not make you look too heroic if you, uh, capture other heroes.”

Taylor brightened. “Oh, I didn’t mean to do that. No wonder you all look so afraid. No, no, I just wanted you all to stop fighting.”

“You just wanted us to stop fighting?” Battery said. She didn’t dare let hope kindle again.

“Yeah. I was just on my way to back to the camp and I saw you all fighting, and I wanted to help, you know?” She looked at all the villains and thugs, a few of which had started to sneak away only to freeze as she took them in. “Aren’t you guys carrying food and supplies and stuff?” She waved towards the convoy.

“Yes, we’re bringing food to the camps,” Battery explained with a gesture towards the trucks. “Tents and medical equipment too.”

“See, that’s great. And then the Empire had to try and stop you, and that's just not nice.”

Rune, who was a proper teenage girl, knew how to spot an opportunity to shift blame when she saw it. “Kaiser told us to do it!” she said, pointing at the thing that was previously Kaiser.

Taylor winced. “Ah, man, I’m really sorry about that. Levia-- I mean, Unit Two can be pretty protective.”

“I forgive you. Please don’t kill me,” Rune said before Stormtiger had time to clamp a hand over her mouth.

Taylor turned to Battery. “Shouldn’t you, I don’t know, arrest them or something?”

That seemed to light a fire under the PRT troopers. Talking to weird capes and Endbringers was a bit beyond them, but arresting thugs they knew how to do. With quick, trained efficiency, they rushed over to the Empire thugs and capes and started restraining them while the Wards kept half an eye on the proceedings.

Taylor, meanwhile, was on tippy-toes trying to straighten out Leviathan’s bandanna to little success. Battery approached a little more, cautiously eyeing the Endbringer as she did. “So, Queen Administrator, would you follow us to our temporary headquarters? I’m sure we have plenty of questions for you.

The new cape abandoned her task and turned to face Battery. She looked down, unable to meet the eyes of the heroine. “Uh, could I maybe pass by later? I, um, have a few things I want to do.”

“I wouldn’t dream of imposing. But, um, maybe tell your... friend to stay back? He’s a little imposing.”

Taylor shrugged. “Sure, but I have to be careful. I’m pretty sure that if he falls out of my range he’ll...” She made a vague gesture with her hand. “You know, go back to how he was before. But it's okay, he’s really, really good at hiding. You wouldn’t think it, with how big he is, but he can move without making any noise when he wants to. Or maybe he can teleport. I’m not sure.”

Battery processed that. Then she processed it some more. “Okay.”

“Awesome. I guess I’ll pass by tomorrow. It was really cool meeting you all. Uh, I’d ask for an autograph, but, well, I’ve got nothing to sign.” She shrugged again, then waved at them. “I should go.”

“Are you, are you sure you don’t want to join us? We could give you almost anything,” Battery said.

“Do you have anything to eat on you?” Taylor asked, her head tilting to the side a little.

“N-not on me, no.”

“Well, then. Come on, Levi-- Unit Two, I’m starving.”

With that, the girl began walking away, hardly noticing that everyone gave her a wide berth. Leviathan, for his part, stood stock still for a few long seconds, then, with a hardly a single wasted motion or even so much as a whisper of noise, the Endbringer sped towards an empty alleyway, leaving only a blur where he had once stood. To most, it simply looked as though he had disappeared.

“Oh god,” Battery said.

***

“So, you never told me that your name was Unit Two of Twenty,” Taylor said conversationally to the empty street. She would have worried that people thought she was weird, but her mouth was covered still, so it was alright.

{Unit-02 Second Unit of 20.}

“That makes sense, I guess,” she said. Her feet carried her towards the entrance and she had to keep quiet or else the Nation Guard men at the gates would have seen her as quite strange. Pulling down her bandanna and shrugging off her hood, Taylor nodded to the men at the gates and made her way in.

It took all of ten minutes for her to discover the bad news.

“But I was only gone for, like, two hours tops,” Taylor said.

The woman across from her wore a frown on her severe face and looked up from a stack of reports to meet Taylor’s eyes. “I’m sorry, Miss Herbert--”

“Hebert.”

“Yes. But we made a full accounting of the people in this camp while you were... otherwise occupied. We only have so many beds and, with the delay over the arrival of supplies, only so much food.” She reached across her field desk and pulled over a pad before she began to write something. “There’s a small shelter on Hunter and Fifth. It’s run by volunteers but it’s clean enough. Ask the young person working there if you can stay. Their rather amenable to helping young folk in distress.”

Taylor took the paper with the address on it, then looked back up at the bureaucrat who just went right back to work. Did the woman expect her to just walk all the way over on her own? Sure, Taylor knew that she was probably safe, what with Leviathan and all, but what if she wasn’t a cape?

She gave the woman a long stare, a pinch of anger boiling in her chest. It didn’t help that she looked a little bit like Blackwell. “Fine.” With that, Taylor stood and started to make her way out of the camp.

“Well, maybe the people over there will be friendly,” she whispered under her breath. Her stomach growled. “And have something to eat.”


	3. In Which Taylor Makes a Buddy

“Shit,” said Director Emily Piggot of the PRT East North East as she summed up the situation.

Thomas Calvert, in his guise as one of the local branch’s consultants, could only nod.

Strewn across a stainless steel table in one of the meeting rooms of the PRT ENE headquarters were a series of printouts that painted a grim picture.

Or, perhaps, an opportunity.

He looked up and took in the others in the room. A few more consultants, those that would usually, like him, be left on the wayside in such a delicate matter but who had been pulled in to make up for some of the lost manpower after the Endbringer attack. There were heroes too. The two members of the Protectorate that had been on the scene, as well as an injured Armsmaster and Miss Militia.

Deputy Director Rennick was out, taking care of the newly imprisoned members of the Empire Eighty Eight. And wasn’t that a victory for the good guys?

Oh, sure, they had lost Rune during transportation, and someone was going to get a slap on the wrist for improperly restraining the girl, but taking in Stormtiger, Hookwolf, Fenja, Cricket and about two dozen unpower mooks was a unilateral victory. Kaiser’s death only made the situation better as far as Coil was concerned. Add that to the deaths of Krieg and Menja the day before and it painted a grim picture for the neonazi gang.

It was like the world’s worst game of good-news bad-news.

“We should arrest her,” Armsmaster said.

“Sure!” Assault said with a cheerful, if somewhat forced grin. “Um, before that, Director, could I switch to a posting in Nevada? I hear it’s dry over there.”

“No one is switching to anywhere. If anything we need every last cape we can get our hands on,” Piggot said. She pinched the bridge of her nose and took a deep breath. “Let’s start from the top. Battery, Assault, are you certain that it wasn’t some sort of projection?”

“If it was,” Battery began before her husband could say something he would regret. “Then it was exceptionally realistic. It stopped a cement block in mid-flight, and then displayed very precise hydrokinesis.”

The Director nodded, and Calvert shifted in his seat. “Director, I think it might be safest to assume that this is the real thing. If it isn’t then we will lose face a little, but we can always claim that we were just being overly cautious. If it is the real thing and we don’t react appropriately...”

“You’re right, of course.” Piggot said. “Battery, Assault, what can you tell me about the girl, this... Queen Administrator. God what a horrible name. If we ever convince her to join our side Glenn’s going to have a field day with a name like that.”

Battery leaned back into her chair and stared up at the ceiling for a moment. “She seemed shy. Almost reserved. Non-confrontational too, though she did jump into the middle of a cape fight to try and stop it.”

“She also,” Assault butted in. “Scared the ever-loving hell out of me. She acted like Leviathan was just a big dog or something, like a pet. And she apologised after Leviathan killed Kaiser, but it sounded... off. Like a kid who was caught with their hand in the cookie jar. Yeah, she was sorry, but it was like she didn’t understand that what she did was wrong, or that it had consequences.”

“We should arrest her,” Armsmaster said, adding his two cents.

“Armsmaster, you are forbidden from interacting with this cape unless she has already opened hostilities or under my direct supervision. I won’t have you bumbling your way into insulting the girl and have her drop her pet Endbringer on us.” Piggot shifted in her seat, a grimace crossed her face for a moment before she schooled herself. “Now, options, the report already says that she’s not interested in joining up. Could we change her mind?”

Battery shrugged. “I asked her if she wanted anything and tried to make it pretty clear that we could do a lot for her. She asked me if I had anything to eat. I... don’t think she’s very materialistic. It’s just a hunch, but offering money or the like probably won’t go far.”

“Her costume was pretty much just normal clothes and a bandanna. She doesn’t seem to care much for her image,” Assault added. “And for all that she was creepy as hell, she wasn’t trying to be intimidating. I mean, the Endbringer was doing plenty of intimidation just standing there completely still and staring at us, but she didn’t seem to notice how that was freaking us all out.”

“How did she direct it?” Armsmaster asked.

“I didn’t see any gestures or the like. She just talked to it. Scolded it for turning Kaiser into a pancake, and it seemed to be listening to her.” Battery grimaced at her own choice of words.

A few faces went green at that description.

“Brilliant. We have a horse whisperer, but for apocalyptic death monsters,” Assault muttered just loud enough that they could all hear.

“Ignoring that for now,” Piggot said while frowning at the irreverent cape. “Any weaknesses we could exploit?”

“She looked like a normal girl. She probably has the same problem all Masters do; she’s baseline human,” Battery said. “I’d like to add one thing, though. I mentioned it in the report but... well, she mentioned a range to her powers and said that she was afraid that Leviathan would... revert back to its previous behaviour. That, and Leviathan was acting very protectively. I think that if we knock her out we’ll either have an angry Endbringer on our hands, or just a... normal one.”

“And if we Master her?” the director asked.

There was some shifting in seats. The PRT frowned upon Masters, Heartbreaker and Glaistig Uaine having set a bad precedent. Still, there were some capes that joined that had unfortunate powers. The Protectorate wasn’t about to refuse more firepower just because a power wasn’t good for PR.

“That depends, would Leviathan see that as an attack on his master and retaliate?” Armsmaster asked.

The Director nodded and pulled one of the sheets closer to her. Thomas recognized it as a threat profile for a new cape. “I’m giving her the temporary threat rating of Master 12. I’m also adding a provision to recruit her at all costs. If she wants her own mansion we’ll bloody well give her one. If she can control other Endbringers, or if one of our trumps can copy her powers, then she’s worth her weight in gold.”

“Especially if the thing with Leviathan’s name is real,” Assault added.

There was a long pause, quite a few looking his way. “What thing?” Piggot said, her brow scrunching up.

“Ah, I don’t know if that was in the report. But she denied that Leviathan was called Leviathan, uh, though she did call it that by accident. It felt like she was trying to convince us that the Endbringer wasn’t an Endbringer. You know, with the mask and all. I don’t know who she thought she was fooling bu--”

“Get to the point, Assault.

“Right, right! So, she told us to call it Unit Two. That much makes sense. If they’re created by someone, well, it was the second one to show up. Problem is, she called it Unit Two of Twenty, the first time around.”

Piggot leaned back into her chair. “That... shit,” she said. “The implication that there are seventeen more Endbringers is, in a word, horrifying. Still, this is an opportunity to learn more about them. I’m going to contact Costa-Brown. We need to be ready for her tomorrow.”

“And how will you treat her?” Miss Militia asked, talking for the first time since the meeting had started.

“With the kid gloves,” Piggot said.

To Thomas Calvert, all problems were opportunities. When the meeting finished he had a long conversation with some of his subordinates.

***

In Which Taylor Makes a Buddy

 

“That’s a dog shelter,” Taylor stated.

{Affirmative.} Leviathan helpfully replied.

She looked at the bit of paper she had been given, then up at the building and to the address painted onto a bit of plywood and placed on a windowsill. They matched. If it wasn’t for the chorus of barking dogs she might even have been fooled into thinking this was a shelter for people.

Pressing a hand against her rumbling stomach, Taylor decided to take her chance and walked into the shelter. It smelled faintly of dog, but also of lemony-cleaning stuff and doggie kibble. Within the dimly lit reception were a few people diligently at work, either carrying bags of dog food over their shoulders or talking while pointing at maps of the city.

“Um, hello?” Taylor said, her voice drowned out by the many dogs. Still, a younger woman by the reception desk looked up and took in her rather dishevelled appearance.

“Oh, hello honey, how can I help you?” she asked as she slipped a lock of coarse brown hair behind an ear.

“Ah, um, I was told that there was a shelter here, that I could stay in?” Taylor said.

The girl laughed, but it wasn’t unkind. “We’re more a shelter for the four-legged then pretty young girls, but we do have a few rooms some of us are staying in.” She looked Taylor up and down, taking in how thin she was under the hoodie and the way she hunched over at the attention. “Tell you what, I’ll bring you to the boss-lady, and you ask her if you can help out. We won’t take anyone that’s not willing to work, but it you’re ready to give a bit of elbow grease we can keep you fed and warm, at least for a few days.”

“That, that would be great!” Taylor said with stars in her eyes.

The young woman grinned. “Brilliant! Come on, I’ll show you to the boss. Oh, and I’m Cassie, by the way.”

“Please to meet you! I’m Taylor.”

Cassie nodded, then picked up a clip-board on the way to the back of the room. “Well, come along Taylor. Oh, and be... patient with the boss. She can be a bit rough but she means well.”

Taylor nodded and followed Cassie into the back room of the shelter. Dozens of cages lined the walls, these filled with excited dogs in every condition imaginable. Some looked to be in good health, but more than a few were gaunt or injured and obviously in need of some attention. To be fair, Taylor thought, the people in the shelter were trying their best. She hadn’t thought about it, but with the attack many dogs had been displaced and had lost track of their families.

“Hey Rachel,” Cassie said as she reached the far end of the room. There was a wide door that lead into a bit of a courtyard in the back, and a tall, butch girl wearing a rough leather coat with a furry neckline was on one knee there, apparently working with a trio of dogs. “I’ve got someone new. She’s looking for work and a place to stay.”

The girl, Rachel, looked up and took Taylor in with a glance, then turned to Cassie. “The fuck is this?”

Cassie rolled her eyes. “This is Taylor, she just needs a place to stay for a few days. She said she was willing to help.”

Rachel’s brows furrowed and she looked at Taylor again. Taylor, for her part, shied away from the girl’s hard stare. “You good with dogs?”

“I, uh, I’m okay? I kinda adopted one yesterday. sorta, and we get along mostly well,” she admitted.

“Where is it?” Rachel asked.

“Uh, I didn’t want to bring him here. He might scare the other dogs and, um, he’s not trained to be around people yet.”

“You left him with food?”

Taylor opened her mouth to reply, then froze. “Oh god, no, I didn’t. Oh gosh darn, what if he’s hungry?”

Rachel’s brow furrowed and she took a small step closer to Taylor. Her dogs walked up behind her, eyeing Taylor too. “You can’t do that.”

“I, I’m sorry?” Taylor said.

Then her stomach grumbled loud enough that everyone heard and she had to press a hand against her chest and tried to mask a grimace.

Almost instantly, Rachel calmed down. “You have anything to eat?” she asked.

“Not, not since yesterday morning, no,” Taylor admitted. “They didn’t have anything at the camps and I didn’t find anything to eat on my own.”

“Stupid,” Rachel accused her before turning to Cassie. “Get her something to eat, then something for her dog. She can pick up shit in the back.”

“Got it, boss,” Cassie said. “I’ll be right back.”

“Thanks!” Taylor said, her face twisting into a watery smile. “Um, I can help today, but I have somewhere I need to be tomorrow afternoon, is that okay? I can come back right after!” she added the last in a hurry.

“Yeah, whatever. You still here in the morning? Then you can help then and when you come back.”

“Thank you so much.”

“Go get your dog and bring him here. We’ll look at him and see if he’s healthy.”

Taylor froze, eyes going wide. “I, uh, don’t think that’s the best idea,” she said in a squeak.

“Why not?”

She was saved from answering when Cassie returned with a tupperware box filled with lukewarm noodles mixed with canned meat-sauce. “Here you go, honey. It’s not the best but it’s what we’ve got left over from this afternoon. We’ll be starting on a proper supper in a bit. Hope this tides you over.”

Taylor took the container and a plastic fork that Cassie handed her, then, with speed born of hunger, began shovelling the noodles in her mouth. “Oh god, this is so good,” she said through a mouthful.

Cassie laughed and shook her head. “Speaking of, I’ll be in the kitchen boss. Food should be ready in an hour or so.”

Rachel made a noise of assent and went back to training her dogs, though she kept an eye on Taylor as she did so. Between two bites of what must have been a master chef’s magnum opus, Taylor whispered to the air. “So, do you eat?”

{Negative. Unit-20 does not require sustenance.}

Taylor’s shoulders drooped in relief. “Oh, thank god.”

“Who you talking to?” Rachel asked.

Fork halfway to her mouth, Taylor paused. “Um, I uh, wasn’t talking to anyone?”

“Bullshit.”

She winced. “Um, I, can talk to my... dog from here?”

Rachel took her in for a long few seconds. “You some sort of parahuman too?”

“I, no, I... too?”

“Yeah. I’m Bitch. I do dogs.” She pointed at her dogs who were all sitting in a row, tails wagging behind them.

“That’s so cool. I, um, have a sort of dog thing too. But it’s not a dog, and I just asked, and he doesn’t eat. So that’s okay. His name’s...” Taylor’s mind ran headlong into a brick wall. She hadn't found a civilian identity for Leviathan yet. “Mr. Fish.”

“Mr. Fish.”

“Yes.”

Rachel gave Taylor the blankest look. “Okay. Will he be trouble?”

“No, no, he’s really quiet,” Taylor assured her.

Rachel Lindt was a simple girl who wanted simple things: she wanted to spend time with her dogs and be left alone, and if this new girl who looked like a kicked puppy wasn’t going to cause trouble then she wasn’t going to make a fuss about it. “There’s a shovel over there. Put the shit in the compost box,” she said before walking away, her dogs trailing after her.


	4. In Which Alexandria is Confused and Taylor Takes Her Endbringer Out For Walkies

Rebecca Costa-Brown was a woman used to being blindsided. Every day, new cases passed her desk, either at the Protectorate Headquarters or in her little office within the confines of a Cauldron base. She could remember, in excruciating detail, the first battle against Behemoth, the first appearance of Leviathan and the day the Simurgh tore apart Lausanne.

There was never, truly, a sense that she had ‘seen it all.’ Sure, she was one of the strongest capes out there, and yes, as Chief Director of the PRT she had seen more than most, but she knew to keep herself grounded and expect the worse.

She pressed a hand to her right cheek, eyes unfocused on the screen before her. The call from Director Piggot--over an emergency line, no less--had been worrying enough. The report she was now reading didn’t make things much better.

Taking a deep breath, she refocused and, with a few clicks, cleared her appointments for the rest of the evening and the next morning. She picked up her office phone and pressed a few keys, turning on a few Tinkertech anti-spyware programs. “Legend I need you in my office, as soon as you can get here,” she said the moment the line was picked up.

“I’ll be there in two,” Legend replied, his voice unusually serious. He had picked up on her own tone.

Hanging up, Rebecca walked over to the window taking up half her office’s wall and worked it open. Just in time, as a prismatic streak was cutting through Los Angeles skyline. When the hero slipped into her room, she shut the window and turned to him.

“What’s wrong, Rebecca?” he asked, his brow knit in worry.

Rebecca opened her mouth to speak, then paused. “I’m not sure where to start, so I guess I’ll start from the beginning. Did you notice anything strange during yesterday’s battle?”

Legend seemed to consider this for a moment. “It was pretty standard. We got there earlier than usual, had time to set things up. And the city came out of it better than I had hoped or expected. Leviathan left at some point but no one was around to see it happen, at least, no one I spoke to.”

Rebecca nodded. “That’s because he never left the city.” She talked past his surprised expression. “I received a report from Director Piggot from Brockton Bay, two of her capes ran into a young woman who was, and I quote’ being followed by Leviathan as though it was her pet poodle.’ That’s from Assault who was on the scene.”

“And it’s real?” he asked.

“From what I’ve gathered, yes. She claims that she’s not interested in joining the Wards, but she acted to stop an assault on a supply convoy by the Empire Eighty Eight. Legend, this girl is walking around free with an Endbringer at her beck and call.”

He eyed her and she knew what he was going to say next. “‘Becca, if she’s got any sort of heroic inclination, we can’t just... get rid of her. This is an opportunity.”

“I know. Trust me, I know. We need this girl on our side. I don’t know if her control extends to the others or not, but even if it doesn’t, we can’t let her just... wander around with that kind of firepower.” She pinched the bridge of her nose. “I’m going to send word to evacuate the city, but for them to do it quietly.”

“I want to meet her,” he said.

Rebecca paused. On the one hand, he was a member of the Triumvirate. If anyone could get away from a hairy situation it would be him. And he was incredibly charismatic. Chances were good that if he opened a dialogue with this Queen Administrator girl, he would get her talking, and maybe convince her to join up where they could better control her. On the other hand, it was a risk. But then, it was no more dangerous that being deployed to any other Endbringer battle.

“Battery from the Protectorate ENE convinced her to show up tomorrow to talk with the PRT. The girl probably wants to sign up as an independent.”

“And we don’t want that?” he asked.

Rebecca made a so-so gesture. “We’d rather have her onboard than not. This isn’t the kind of thing you can ignore, and we need to keep her safe from the Fallen, the Slaughterhouse Nine or the Yàngbǎn whatever she chooses. Contessa can probably help with that. But I would much rather she be under our thumb.”

“‘Becca, I’m not going to force a kid to join us. If she wants to be independent then we can help her without taking away her freedom. If we’re kind to her she’ll probably join us of her own free will.”

The chief director shifted on the spot. “Fine, try it your way. If anything it will at least appease her and show that we’re taking things seriously.” She leaned back onto her desk. “But do be careful.”

Legend gave her one of his signature smiles. “Don’t worry, I’m sure everything will be fine.” 

***

“And this, it Mr. Fish!” Taylor said. She was in an excellent mood. Yeah, sure, she had to help at the dog shelter, but it wasn’t any worse than doing chores at home and she got to play with the dogs a bit. She just hoped that Leviathan wasn’t getting jealous of all the attention she was paying to the dogs.

Rachel took in the alleyway where the blue light of a rising sun was only just bright enough to highlight the shadows and hide the worse of the debris lining the walls. Then she looked up at the tallest shadow, at the four-eyed creature standing thirty feet tall and whose arms had descended onto either side of Taylor in an almost protective fashion.

“That’s not a dog.”

“Well, no, but he acts like a dog... sometimes.” Taylor hugged Leviathan’s leg and smiled up at the city-killing monster. “So, uh, you said that you wanted to go on patrol with your dogs. Could I bring Mr. Fish along? See, we’re trying to be heroes too.”

Rachel looked down from the Endbringer and stared at Taylor. “Will he hurt my dogs?”

“No! Well, not unless they try to hurt me.”

She shrugged. “Okay, I guess. Does he need a leash?”

“Do you have one that’s big enough?” Taylor asked back a little dubiously. Leviathan’s neck was rather on the thick side.

“Yeah.” With that, Rachel turned and made her way back towards the dog shelter, her three constant companions at her heels though they were sneaking looks at Leviathan.

The shelter was only just down the block from where Leviathan was hiding, so Taylor didn’t have far to go to find her Endbringer. With a few quick motions, she put her bandanna back on and pulled down her hoodie, noting as she did that her clothes were getting a little scruffy.

“Come on!” she called over her shoulder.

{Understood.} Leviathan followed after her, his footsteps making the ground tremble.

Taylor, no, the intrepid heroine Queen Administrator and her plucky sidekick Unit Two, waited in front of the shelter and ignored the panicked screams from just down the road. Yes, Unit Two did look rather scary, but there wasn’t much she could do about that... yet.

Rachel came out with a mask held in one hand and a length of chain dangling from the other. “Here,” she said as she passed Taylor the chain and began to affix her mask. “We’ll go around this block, then head west.”

“Cool. Hey, do you think it’d be alright if we take something of a detour? I, uh, want to check on something.”

“‘S long as it don’t take too long.” Rachel tapped her dogs on their heads. Taylor watched, fascinated, as the dogs started to grow bigger and taller and boney spikes tore out of their bodies. In a few short minutes the dogs were the size of minivans and Rachel was climbing up the side of the biggest of them.

“Wait, you’re going to ride on your patrol?” Taylor asked. She couldn’t see the look Rachel was giving her on account of the mask, but it was easy to guess. “Uh, okay, give me a minute.”

Turning to Leviathan she gestured at the Endbringer, and when that failed to do anything tried speaking. “Hey, can you dip your head down a bit?”

{Complying.} he said as he lowered his head.

Giving him a smile in gratitude, Taylor looped the chain around his neck, then fastened it into a rough knot. “Hey, do you think I could ride on your shoulder?” she asked.

{Affirmative.}

“Awesome!” Taking a bit of a running leap, Taylor grabbed onto the slick fish-like skin along Leviathan’s back and pulled herself up so that she was perched on his shoulder, then she grabbed onto the chain still wrapped around his neck and used it as a handhold. “Okay, okay, now stand up, but slowly.”

{Understood.} Gently, Leviathan stood up to his full height and Taylor, perched on his shoulder and looking at the ground far below, giggled in a mixture of joy and vertigo. “Hey, if I fall, you’ll catch me, right?”

{Additional Secondary Directive: Prevent Host-Queen_Administrator from suffering from kinetic damage in case of a fall. Directive Accepted.}

“Okay Rachel, lead the way!” she called out to her new buddy.

Rachel looked nonplussed but soldiered on with aplomb. “This way.”

The first few steps were a little jarring, but some whispered instructions had Leviathan even out his pace so that he was slinking forwards like a predator stalking prey, rather than a giant in a fragile world. It also made Taylor realize something really important. “I need a sword.”

{New Secondary Directive: Acquire ‘Sword?’}

“Hrm, no, no, I’ll find one on my own. You know, it’s almost too bad that you splattered Kaiser, I bet he could make awesome swords. Ohh, and we should get you a costume. Or at least a hat!”

{New Secondary Directive: Acquire ‘Hat?’}

“Yes. But later.”

The patrol route that Rachel lead Taylor down was fairly simple. First, they cut out towards the Boardwalk where looters and scavengers were even now breaking into shops. Most of these fled as soon saw they saw Rachel’s huge dogs. The rest ran screaming when they saw Taylor and Mr. Fish. It made her feel all warm inside, to know that she was helping protect the city, and only a couple of days since deciding to become a cape!

Then, with a few grunted cues, Rachel led her deeper into the city into what was once Empire territory, but was now mostly a wrecked landscape. There were more normal people here, and they tended to shy away from the pair of capes but didn’t always run screaming. A few even took out phones to take pictures and film their passing.

Taylor waved shyly at a few of them, but quickly found herself pressing into Leviathan’s side to avoid the gazes of their cameras. “Are we going to circle back to the shelter now?” she asked.

“Mmm, not yet. Gonna go see one of my... friends first.”

“Okay, cool. And, um, the place I wanted to go was that way. It’s not too far, especially since we’re moving pretty fast.”

Rachel looked in the direction Taylor was pointing. “We could go by rooftop.”

“Oh, that sounds so cool!”

“Later,” she said before turning her attention back to where her pack was walking. They crossed the entrance to another shelter, this one taking up an entire church and a few community buildings as well as a large parking area that hadn’t been too badly hit by the flooding, then Rachel led them off the main roads and through a winding path made up entirely of alleyways and passages through broken fences.

She slowed to a stop, whistling so that her other dogs did the same, just as they were nearing the docks. “It’s there,” she said, pointing towards a two story building that didn’t seem to have been hit too hard by the attack. “Stay here.”

There were maybe a dozen people hanging around the entrance from every ethnic group and age, which as far as Taylor knew was a good sign. A desk sat just outside, manned by a gruff older man with a military bearing and a pretty blonde girl.

“Lisa!” Rachel called out as she brought her dogs a little closer.

The blonde looked up and grinned at Rachel. “Heya Bitch, doing your rounds, I see,” she said before turning to whisper something to the man next to her. “I’ll be with you in a minute.” She raced into the shelter.

Taylor, who was until then sneaking a peak around the corner, pulled back on Leviathan’s leash and pointed off towards the side. “There,” she said and the lumbering Endbringer shifted over to where she had pointed.

This day had been getting better and better. Hanging out with Rachel wasn’t quite fun, but she was a nice enough girl and didn’t pry much. Taylor wasn’t sure if she could trust her yet not after... She shook her head. Anyway, Rachel seemed the same way, which, if anything, made her feel much better about herself. And later they would go by her house, maybe dad... but she’d better not think about that either.

“So, Leviathan, do you know any tricks?”

{Definition Request: ‘Tricks.’}

“You know, like, uh, shake hands, play dead, stuff like that.”

{Unit-02 capabilities include: Psychological Warfare, Macro Hydrokinesis, Flow Dynamics Manipulation, Ranged Sensing--}

“No, no, none of those are useful,” Taylor said with a shake of her head. “I meant stuff you can do, you know, like, um, maybe you could use your Hydrokinesis for fishing, or something.”

{Correction Understood. Unit-02 capabilities include: Mass Manipulation of Marine Biology, Promoting Conflict, Genocide, Temperature Manipulation, Weather Manipulation, Landscaping--}

 

“Oh, oh, could you make ice cream?”

Leviathan paused. That wasn’t to say that he had been moving much, but his arms did sway a little and his head was always moving, now he froze on the spot. Half a minute later the Endbringer started moving again. {Affirmative.}

Taylor’s grin was vicious. “Perfect. Now, I know people think you’re scary, but I’m sure we could go and grab some ingredients and make some killer ice cream, then we can give it to all the kids in the shelters. Maybe start a mini-water park with your hydrokinesis? Yeah, I’ve got this PR stuff in the bag. Endbringer? Hah, more like... Ice-Cream-Bringer... we can work on that one.”

“Taylor,” came Rachel’s voice from around the corner. “Lisa wants to talk at you.”

Rachel and her friend, Lisa, came around the corner. The blonde was rolling her eyes at her friend’s phrasing, a smug grin on her face. Then she actually looked ahead of her and promptly twitched so hard that she almost landed on her face.

Two wide eyes stared up at Leviathan, then raced up to the girl sitting on his shoulder. “Hi! You must be Lisa. Rachel... well, actually she didn’t say anything about you, but that means she didn’t say anything bad, right? I’m not very good at introductions am I?” she said. Then, in what might have been a suicidal move for a non-Brute, she shoved herself off the Endbringer and fell towards the ground.

Just a few feet before crashing to the pavement, a tendril of swirling water wrapped around her waist and gently caught her before lowering down to the ground and whipping back from whence it came. She extended a hand towards Lisa. “I’m Taylor, or Queen Administrator in costume. Pleased to meetcha!”

Lisa fainted.


	5. In Which Taylor Goes Home

Not super happy with this one, but I’m impatient to move on to the next bit of the story, so have at it.

“She alright?” Taylor asked.

Lisa was on the ground, eyes closed and breathing even while three excited dogs sniffed at her. Rachel let out a high-pitched whistle and called them off the girl. She bent over and shifted Lisa’s head to make sure her airway was clear, then pressed a pair of rough fingers against the side of her throat. “She’s breathing and her heart’s fine,” Rachel announced a few seconds later.

“Should we call for an ambulance, or, I guess there’s no service. Maybe we should bring her somewhere?”

Then Lisa blinked rapidly before pressed her hands over her eyes. “My head,” she groaned.

“Oh darn, did you knock your head? Do you have a concussion?”

Lisa shook her head, then winced as she instantly regretted her answer. “Just a headache. I’m uh, one of Rachel’s friends.”

Taylor blinked at the non-sequitur. “Okay.”

The girl on the floor sighed, then noticed the hand Rachel was holding out for her. “Thanks,” she muttered as she got back to her feet. “I’m on Rachel’s team. I’m a Thinker. Thinker headache.” She waved towards Leviathan and Taylor. “Too much.”

Taylor’s brow scrunched up in concern and she shifted on the spot, that was until Lisa looked at her and her eyes widened in shock and horror. “What? Are you okay? I mean, no, it’s pretty clear that you’re not, but, I mean-- oh, maybe Mr. Fish can help?”

“You, you were just thinking about using Leviathan’s Hydrokinesis to fix my headache!”

“That’s so cool! It’s like you can read minds.” Taylor clapped. “Do you think it would work?”

Lisa started waving her arms in denial. “No!”

“Oh, okay. Also, that’s not Leviathan, it’s Mr. Fish.”

Lisa fainted again.

A few moments later Lisa groaned, this time clutching at her head with both hands as she twisted and squirmed on the ground. “Scion spinning on a stick, my head hurts.”

“Ah, sorry,” Taylor said. She turned towards Rachel. “Should we bring her back to the shelter?”

“No!” Lisa said before bolting upright only to sag in Rachel’s side. “No, I won’t let you just... wander around with your pet Endbringer. I live in this city too, dammit. Rachel, help me onto Judas, I’m following the pair of you.”

“Stupid. You’re hurt. Go back inside,” Rachel said.

“Hell no. Anyway, the boss wants us to keep on eye on her, so that’s what we’ll do, alright.” Lisa wobbled over to one of the smaller dogs and tried to climb up.

“Why’d you tell her, she heard you,” Rachel said as she pointed a thumb Taylor’s way.

With a heave, Lisa managed to grab onto one of the bigger spikes and fumbled her way onto the dog’s back. “It’s not spying if she knows you’re doing it.”

Taylor could only nod and accept that logic as she climbed back onto Leviathan’s shoulder with just a bit of help from the Endbringer himself. “Well, if she insists. But if you need to take a break or something don’t be afraid to ask, okay?”

Lisa just gave her a thumbs up, then flopped forwards to hug the beast she was riding. She closed her eyes and pressed her face into the dog’s back with a groan. Rachel gave her friend one last concerned look before hopping onto the biggest dog. “Where’re we going now?” she asked Taylor.

Taylor wasn’t sure what to do with or about Lisa. The girl really did seem to be in pain, but she was being very melodramatic about it. Then again, she was a Thinker, and Rachel’s friend. Maybe she was just stranger. With a nod, she decided that that must be it. Lisa was just a very strange girl. “That way!” Taylor said while pointing off and away from the docks.

The path home was both familiar and jarring. Sure, she recognized every building on the way, and it wasn’t as if the roads had changed places, but the shops were all closed down, some of those familiar buildings bore holes and cracks along their sides, if they weren't torn down completely, and while she was used to not seeing tons of people, there had always been a few folks going about their business. Now the roads were deserted.

Then she turned a corner and saw home. It was still standing, a little rougher than she remembered, and there was trash piled up by the steps and it looked like maybe one of the windows had been broken by a branch but it was home. Taylor pulled on Leviathan’s leash and made a gesture for him to stop.

The three dogs did the same behind her, and watched as she clambered down the Endbringer’s side. “Hey, Unit-02. You listen to Lisa and Rachel until I return, alright?”

{New Secondary Directive from Host-Queen_Administrator: Obey Host-Inqusitive_Negotiator and Host-Biomass_Sculpter until Host-Queen_Administrator returns to present location. Directive Accepted.}

Taylor tossed the chain towards Lisa who fumbled with it, then stared up at the Endbringer. Leviathan looked at her with what might have been attentive curiosity. She started hyperventilating.

With a halting gait, Taylor started walking home. She paused every dozen or so steps, looking over her shoulder towards Leviathan who was even now staring at a panicking Lisa while Rachel tried to reassure her friend. Maybe she should go back? But no, she had to know.

Biting her lip until it bled, Taylor closed her eyes, balled up her fists, and stomped up the steps. One of them creaked under her weight and that comforting sound was almost enough to set her to crying, but she held firm.

The door was locked, so she fished in her pockets for her keys and fumbled at the lock until they fit in. She needn’t have bothered. Almost as soon as she fit the key in the door was torn open from the inside and she found herself face to face with her dad.

Her looked, in a word, like crap. His hair was dishevelled and there was a nasty bruise on one cheek. His button up shirt was missing a few buttons and his jeans had stains all the way up to his knees.

Taylor’s vision went blurry with tears and she wrapped equally-dirty arms around her father. His own wrapped around her shoulders and she was pressed up against a chest that smelled of salt water and sweat and home.

“Shh, it’s okay, it’s okay,” her dad whispered into her hair. “You’re home, you’re safe.”

She started sobbing in earnest.

***

It took an hour, a bath using a bucket of lukewarm water, a change of clothes and two cups of tea for Taylor to really calm down. She was in the living room, aware that time was passing but willing to ignore it for now. Her dad was safe. Her home was still there. Oh, sure, there was no power and the water was cut, but it was still standing.

“Now what?” Taylor asked before taking another sip of Earl Grey, her mom’s favourite.

“I don’t know, really. I got in touch with a few of the boys from the Union. There’s a lot of work to do, clearing up the streets and picking things up. Not to mention rebuilding after. You could help us,” he offered.

She smiled, then brought her knees up to her chest. “I, um, I have an appointment later. But after that, I wouldn’t mind.”

“An appointment?”

She nodded. “With the Protectorate.”

Her dad was many things, but a fool he was not. “Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Okay then. Did you want me to go with you?” He seemed ready to jump off the couch and go right then and there. She smiled at him.

“No, it’s okay.”

He winced. “The roads aren’t safe.”

“I can take care of myself, dad.”

His return smile was a little watery, a little uncertain. “I guess you can. Your mom would be proud, you know.”

Taylor had to swallow hard to keep from crying again. “I hope so.” She looked at the wall-mounted clock atop the television. “I should go.”

“You’ll be back?”

“Promise.” She stood up, the effort far outweighing the simplicity of the motion. “Oh, and dad, you remember how you didn’t want me to get a dog?”

Danny Hebert might not have been the best father, but he could sense a trap when his daughter laid one. “Yes?”

“About that...”

***

“Okay! I’m clean, got new-ish clothes and I’m ready to go!” She came upon Lisa scowling up at Leviathan and Rachel lounging against the side of one of her dogs that had laid down to sleep in the middle of the road. “I hope you two weren’t too bored?”

“Nah, Lisa tried to make Leviathan kill someone but it wouldn’t listen,” Rachel said.

“Lisa!” Taylor shouted. “You can’t just do that.”

With one eye closed and her face scrunched up in pain, the girl turned towards Taylor. “Well, I know that now. Some sort of restriction? Asimov’s Three Laws? Damn, there should be a way around that.”

{Host-Queen_Administrator has returned. Secondary Directive Accomplished.} Leviathan added.

“Well hello to you too,” she shot back. “Lisa, stop trying to get Mr. Fish to do mean things. And now I need to go and visit the Protectorate to register as an independent. You two wanna come with? Maybe they’ll be nicer if they see us all together.”

“Uh, raincheck on that,” Lisa said. “My head hasn’t hurt this hard since... in a while. Rachel, would you drop me off at the shelter?” The dog-masked girl gave a grunt of acknowledgement. “Thanks. Oh, and Taylor, you need a costume.”

Taylor blinked at the non-sequitur. “I do?”

Lisa nodded. “Look, all this cape stuff, the fighting the patrolling, it’s all part of a game, of sorts. The exception are the S-class things. So, when someone sees a parahuman dressed in,” she paused, then took in the jeans and hoodie Taylor was wearing. “Normal clothes, it tells them that that cape might not be playing by the rules.”

“The rules?”

“The unwritten rules. It’s like a code of conduct. If you break them all the others will band against you. Respect the secret identities of other parahumans, try not to use lethal force, no widespread attacks against civilians, and no sexual assault of any kind. It’s all common decency stuff. The people who don’t follow them are folks like the S9 or Heartbreaker. And they don’t go around in costume. So the costume is more than just a way to hide your identity, it’s a sign that you’ll play fair.”

Taylor nodded, taking it all in. “So, if I had a costume I’d look less threatening?”

Lisa snorted and shook her head. “No, there’s no way for you to look any less threatening, I’m sorry. But having a costume would tell them that you’re willing to play by the rules.”

She winced. “I don’t have a fixed hour for my appointment, but I don’t want to keep them waiting either. Still, that only leaves me with a few hours to get a costume together.”

“Ah hah! No worries Taylor, that’s where the wonderful and illustrious Tattletale sweeps in to save the day. I happen to know people.” She made a ‘wait a minute’ gesture, then pulled out a receipt from one pocket and a pen from another. In no time she had an address scrawled onto the bit of paper. “Don’t tell her I sent you.”

Taylor took in the address--not too far from the Boardwalk, or the PRT headquarters, it wouldn’t be much of a detour--and the name written beneath it. “Parian?”

“Brockton Bay’s own fashionista rogue. Just be polite and try not to scare her too much.” Lisa tried a smug grin but it soon faded as her head started pounding again. “Okay, I need to chow down on a handful of Tylenol and sleep for about a week. Rachel, you read to go?”

Rachel nodded, then helped Lisa climb onto one of her dogs. Before jumping onto another, she turned towards Taylor. “You coming back later?”

“To the dog shelter? Um, no, I think I’ll stay with my dad. But I might pass by to help.” She stepped up to give Rachel a hand, but the girl just brushed her off and hopped onto the back of her biggest dog as though she’d done it a thousand times.

“See you ‘round,” Rachel said as she started walking off. Lis and her other dog followed after with little fuss, the Thinker bent forwards with her eyes closed the entire time.

“Well, that was fun, wasn’t it?” she asked Leviathan.

{Affirmative.} he replied.

***

Sabah lifted a bolt of cloth that had fallen by one end, then let it fall. It was probably salvagable, the bit that hadn’t soaked in murky waters. She sighed and moved towards her workbench nestled at the far end of the room. Her scissors and needles were spread across the floor like a minefield of caltrops. She had to take careful steps to avoid the worst of the damage. Part of the ceiling had collapsed, but it was mostly in the storefront.

The worse was the water, still pooled across the floor at ankle-height. Her shop was recessed a little, while the storefront was on street level, so all the water was pooling in the back. Her stock was going to smell like fetid water for days.

She might have lost a mannequin or two our front, and some completed projects, but those she could replace. Then there was her inventory. Admittedly not too much of it. Being a rogue was finally starting to pay off and her sales had cleared out a good bit of it before the Endbringer hit.

To think that a few days ago her biggest worry was designing fast enough to overcome demand and make enough to cover the power bill. Now there was no power on the entire street and she would be lucky if her insurances covered a fifth of the damages.

She grabbed a dress from where it had been left abandoned on a desk, then balled her hands into a fist, scrunching the cloth up. It was stained, and damaged. Ruined.

With a wordless, whinny yell, she flung it across the room. It didn’t even make it halfway.

Sabah found one of the little stools she used when fitting a client, righted it, then flopped down upon it. Her arms wrapped around the frilly lace of her costume and she allowed herself to shiver in the darkness of her shop.

She soon calmed herself. Her mother had raised her better than that. She just had to look at it from a more utilitarian point of view, use the scientific method. She almost snorted as she looked around. Her in-depth research revealed that her dream was fucked.

She jumped to her feet, stool clattering down behind her. If she had to abandon her dream then so be it. She had a family--no, families--to keep safe, and unless a client walked in right then and there, there was little she could do to get her shop back in shape.

“Um, hello?” came a voice from the front. Young, female. “Is anyone in here? Um, the door was open. I’m pretty sure you’re not in business right now-now, but I wanted to chat. Maybe?”

Her first thought was that one of the gangs had sent someone to harass her. But she gave up on the idea soon enough. Too innocent, not nearly threatening enough. “We’re closed!” she shouted to the front, remembering at the last moment to change her accent to the one she associated with ‘Parian.’

“Yeah, I kinda figured. I’m sorry. A friend of mine told me that this was the place to go for costumes and stuff. I guess that won’t be happened. Well, dang it all to heck.”

Sabah paused. “Dang it all... to heck?” She took a few steps closer to the door leading to the storefront, if only to see the angry twelve-year old waiting there. She paused again when the rest registered. A costume. The girl was a cape.

“Ah, I’m trying not to say bad words. You know. Wouldn’t be very hero-like. Uh, not that I’m a hero yet. I’m supposed to go meet them later, but a friend of mine told me not to do that without a costume already or else they’d think I’m threatening.”

Sabah took a deep breath, then shook her head and gave in to her curiosity. If anything, the shop was still full of cloth, a million threads each waiting for her to ping them to life. There were few places where she could use her power to its fullest, and this was one of them. “I see, well, welcome to Parian’s Boutique,” she said as she walked in.

The girl was thin, swimming inside a hoodie that was a few sizes too large. Her jeans were clean, but worn, and not the right cut for someone with such long, thin legs. Her shoes were stained, worn, and one good idea away from being trashed. Her face was hidden, mostly, by a bandanna that Parian would have sworn was made of canvas of all things. All in all, not terribly impressive. She was also, Parian noted, guiltily holding a top hat in both hands.

She tilted her head to one said, a gesture that she had practiced until it conveyed just the right flavour of ‘really?’ and the girl put the hat back onto the mannequin that had been wearing it. “Ah, hi! I’m Queen Administrator, I’m new-ish.”

“Please to meet you... Queen Administrator,” Parian said. She revised her estimate of the girl’s age. She was too tall to be twelve. Fourteen, maybe a late-blooming fifteen. “How can I help you?”

“I need a costume.”

“You need a costume right now?”

The girl nodded. “Yeah. I know, kind of last minute. And I don’t really have much money. Or any money. But I swear I can pay you back! Cross my heart and everything.”

Parian giggled, the sound escaping her before she reigned it in. The gall of her. Still, she wasn’t really wasting anyone’s time. She would still be sulking out back if it wasn’t for the distraction, and she could always return to sulking later. “A custom costume in... how much time, exactly?”

The girl, Queen Administrator, winced. “Ah, about an hour?”

Parian blinked. There were deadlines and then there were deadlines. “That’s a bit much, don’t you think? And even if I wanted to help you, my shops got a few inches of water all over.”

“I can help with that!” Queen Administrator said, standing tall and proud. “Or, well, my friend Unit Two can.” She turned and rushed towards the door. “Hey, there’s water in her shop, could you... I don’t know, take it out?” she asked someone outside.

Parian tensed. Another cape? She was about to question the girl when a noise not so terribly unlike a drain being pulled in a tub sounded out from behind her and a spout of twisting water flew out of the shop, through the store, and over the girl’s head to splash harmlessly outside.

“Tada!” Queen Administrator said. Her bandanna had fallen a little, revealing a wide grin.

She took a step back, then peaked into her shop. It was dry. Beyond dry. There wasn’t even a hint of humidity in the air, and some of the cloth that had been weighted down by water earlier were now as dry as the desert. She was rather impressed.

“That will certainly save me a few moments of work, thank you,” she said. “But I’m really not sure I can help you, Miss Queen Administrator.”

The girl pouted and snapped her fingers in consternation, then she brightened. “Wait, what about advertising?”

“Advertising?”

“Yeah, Unit Two is pretty big. I could put an ad for your store on his side?” She pointed over her shoulder with a thumb.

Curious, Parien stepped closer, then followed as the girl walked out into the dusty afternoon. The first thing she noticed was that the the streets were a little emptier than she remembered them being an hour ago. The second thing she noticed was Leviathan.

She would have screamed, or attacked, or ran, but her heart seized up in her chest, a moment of the purest existential horror. To have survived so much only to die right then and there.

Queen Administrator hugged Leviathan’s leg.

Sabah’s brain crashed.

“Whu?” she said in lieu of an actual sentence. Whatever image of serene grace she had built with Parian was gone in the light of an Endbringer standing in front of her shop.

“Ah, shucks, I keep forgetting how people react to you, big guy,” Queen Administrator said to Leviathan. The beast looked down at her. “Now, be nice. Wave at the pretty lady.”

Leviathan’s four-eyed gaze rose like a tsunami over the horizon, green like the depths of the ocean where horror’s lurked took in Sabah’s motionless form. He waved.

Sabah rebooted. “That’s... what?”

“Right, so like I was saying, you could put an ad on him. Well, not on-him on-him, but maybe on a cape or something? Maybe one of those sandwich boards.”

Sabah visualized the panicked screams of her clients as Leviathan stood before her dream shop in New York, a giant sandwich board with her face on it covering his scaly chest. She blinked away the nightmare. “I, I... you control him?”

“Not really. I tell him what to do, and sometimes he does it.” She shrugged. “I’m supposed to meet with the Protectorate later, but I don’t have a costume. That’s why I’m here.”

“I see.” Costume. She could do costumes. Cloth and colours and styles that hid symbolism. She could understand those things. They were safe. “I can help.”

Queen Administrator’s eyes lit up. “Really? Awesome!” Quick as a flash, the girl was right up against Sabah and squeezing her in a tight hug.

The Leviathan watched.

“Oh god,” Sabah uttered under her breath.


	6. In Which Taylor Makes a First Impression

Taylor loved her new costume. Oh, sure, it was going to be a real pain putting it on and taking it off, but it looked awesome for something stitched together in under an hour. She kicked her feet, the tassels of her robes bouncing with every motion.

Next to her, Leviathan’s head turned her way and his one eye focused on her for a moment before returning to the road ahead. “You look really good with that hat, Levi,” she said, then she adjusted her own headwear.

{Affirmative.}

“Now, onwards!”

***

To say that the people gathered at the PRT headquarters were tense was something of an understatement.

Legend was used to seeing the men and women of the PRT trying their best, but those were situations where they were either in the thick of the action or at rest. Now, he took in the guards shifting from foot to foot and more than one of them had twitchy fingers that longed to hold a gun or a foam launcher or anything that they could use to protect themselves.

He did his best to comfort them, smiling and patting the armoured shoulders of the troopers he passed and he saw the way they straightened up and stood taller.

That was in the morning.

The afternoon came and went and with it the pressure and tension ramped up. Soon the capes that had volunteered, most of them locals, were pacing back and forth and the troopers were sweating in their armour. The office workers had been sent away except for a few key persons and the buildings around the headquarters had been silently and efficiently evacuated.

“I’m not sure whether I would rather she show up already, or pull a no-show,” Emily Piggot said as she walked up next to him.

Legend glanced at her from where he stood on the building’s roof and tried a smile. “I know what you mean. But it would be a shame to have flown all the way to your fine city only to spend the day perched on a rooftop.”

She snorted. “Fine isn’t the word I would use. We’ll rebuild what we can, but this place was already dying before Leviathan hit, and if things don’t go well with this Queen Administrator girl, well that might put the final nail in the coffin that is Brockton Bay.”

He didn’t want to give in to the pessimism, but he could see how alluring it was. “Did you see the report from the Think Tank?”

She nodded. Of course she had, she was the director, but he knew to stick to polite pleasantries when they cost him nothing. “What little they had available. ‘Possibly suffering from shock.’ ‘Possible aversion to authorities.’ ‘Possible passive control over the Endbringer.’ It’s a lot of possibles and not enough concrete information.”

He moved away from the edge of the roof. “They did the best they could with what little they had.”

Emily couldn’t say much to that. “I know, but I wish we had more. The last thing we need is a directed Endbringer, you can imagine why I’d rather she not be in my city.”

“I can. If this were near my home, well, I’d have moved my husband and son out of the city already. I can understand your concern Emily, but wait until we’ve actually talked to her before jumping to the worse conclusions.” He patted her on the shoulder and was about to go one when he felt the tension shift.

The other troopers on the roof shifted. Armsmaster and Miss Militia, both stationed not too far from him, tensed and the heroine’s weapon shifted from a knife to a rifle as long as she was tall.

He walked to the edge and looked down and there was Leviathan, the monster slinking forward’s with a predator’s grace. “Alright everyone, to your places!” he called before backing away and heading towards the roof access. “And good luck.”

“We’ll need it,” Piggot muttered.

***

Taylor was, surprisingly, rather bored. Oh sure, she was a little nervous about meeting the heroes, but that was still minutes away. So she contented herself with swinging back and forth on Leviathan’s shoulder while humming a childish song. “The itsy-bitsy spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out--”

{Secondary Directive: Eliminate all Arachnid lifeforms?}

“What? No! Spiders might be icky but that’s no reason to hurt them all. Now... mosquitoes on the other hand.” She contemplated that for a few moments, but it would probably mess with the ecosystem and make a mess of things. “Nah, nevermind.”

{Affirmative.}

They were almost at the headquarters, a huge white building with the PRT logo on its front and a wide area cleared out around it. It wasn’t the prettiest building but it didn’t have to be pretty to be a symbol. She pointed at the entrance way. “That’s where we’re going.”

There were surprisingly few people around, and that included the people who worked for the PRT. She waited until Leviathan was in the little parking area in front of the building, then hopped off. The dozens of layers of cloth that made up her costume fluttered around her for a moment before Leviathan’s water echo wrapped around her waist and lowered her to the ground. “Thanks! You stay out here unless things go bad, okay?”

{Affirmative.}

With a nod and a deep breath to bolster her confidence, Taylor walked up to the front door.

“Girl!”

Taylor paused, a hand on the door. She turned and took in the shirtless man standing in the middle of the parking lot. He was a bug guy, his chest and arms covered in intricate dragon tattoos and his face hidden by a mask shaped like a dragon’s mouth. “You are the one controlling that beast?” he roared, a calloused hand pointing at Leviathan.

“Um, well, yeah,” she said.

“I am Lung, the Dragon of Kyushu, and I demand a battle!” he said even as his back started hunching and he grew a few inches.

Taylor shrugged. “Okay, but can it wait, like, ten minutes? I’ve got some paperwork to fill out.”

“Your insolence knows no limits, girl. We will fight now!”

She sighed, then turned to Leviathan. “You wanna spar with him?”

{Unit-02 is combat ready. New Objective” Eliminate Host-Escalation_Engine?}

“No, no, don’t kill him. Just, you know, a friendly spar. Don’t hurt him or anything, and don’t break the buildings. I’ll be back in a few. Got it?”

{Affirmative. Allow Host-Escalation_Engine to resolve Conflict upon Unit-02. Secondary: Do not harm Host-Escalation_Engine. Tertiary: Do not destroy local structures.}

“Right, have fun Lung.” Taylor stepped into the PRT Headquarters.

***

Timothy was an intern. Timothy had been working for the PRT for about three months. Timothy probably should have gone home when they told everyone to evacuate the building, but then Deputy Director Rennick had asked for some printouts of some forms and then the troopers had all asked for coffee and then he got to meet Legend and then they needed someone to make sure the conference room on the fourth floor was clean and then he made his way downstairs and started talking to Jessica, the cure girl who worked at the reception desk.

He taught he was on the verge of getting digits when Jessica asked him to watch the desk for just a minute while she went to the little girl’s room.

In hindsight, he should have refused. That was probably against protocol.

In fact, he should pick up the phone and call someone. Maybe the Deputy Director. Maybe Legend. Maybe his mom. Instead, he opened his mouth and squeaked.

“Um, I’m here to register as an independent.”

She was very tall for someone who sounded so young. Or maybe that was the costume emphasizing her height. It was made of hundreds of pieces of cloth, all draped one over the other in a flowing robe that reached all the way down to her feet. The edges of the cloth looked water-stained, as though they’d been sitting in murky water all day. Her hands were mostly hidden, but they came up to adjust her headpiece, a hood made of the same blue-green material that dipped way down to hide the top half of her face. The top of it was twisted and cut to look like a crown was sitting on her head.

That was fine. One of the reasons Timothy joined was the opportunity to meet capes. It was one of the big draws the PRT had for him. What was less fine was the creature dancing around Lung’s wild blows just outside the building.

She tilted her head to one side. “Are you okay, mister?”

The building shook.

Timothy opened his mouth, then closed it. He tried again and this time managed to squeak out a “Yes.”

She smiled. “Great! So, do I have to fill out any forms or anything?”

“I, I yes, one moment.” He reached out and fumbled with the phone before finally picking it up on his second try. Shaking fingers dialed the Deputy Director’s number.

“This is Rennick.”

“S-sir. There’s a cape at the front.”

“Yes, we were expecting her. Were there any complications?”

He swallowed hard. “No? I mean, uh, where do I send her?”

“You send her? Tim, why are you the one talking to her?” the Deputy Director asked, his voice a lot harder that usual.

“I have no idea,’ Timothy admitted.

There was a sigh on the line. “Send her, politely, to the conference room on the fourth floor. Politely.”

The entire time he had been on the phone the cape was twisting from side to side, the pleats of her robe swirling around her legs with every motion. She was eyeing the gift shop off to the side, though he couldn’t tell if it was out of curiosity of longing.

“Um, miss, there’s a room for you on the fourth floor. Just, take the elevator there and there should be someone to escort you up.”

Her beaming smile returned. “Great! Thanks mister.” With that she was off and almost skipping towards the elevators.

Timothy sank into Jessica’s seat.

He should have gone home.

“Mister?”

Timothy nearly jumped out of his skin. The cape was still there, standing just across from him. “What?” he squawked.

“Do you think I can visit the gift shop before going upstairs?”

For just a second, a tiny second, Timothy almost told her that no, she couldn’t do that. She had to follow their instructions and go upstairs where some very important people were waiting for her. Then Lung, now twenty feet long, fired a beam of fire so thick it looked solid right towards the PRT building only for it to ram against a wall of ice that appeared seemingly out of nowhere. “Sure!”

***

She walked into the gift shop with her head turning left and right as if to take in every little detail. There were new Triumvirate action figures prominently on display next to T-shirts with the logos of local wards and dolls of various popular members of the Protectorate. One wall had a replica Armsmaster halberd above a section filled with Tinker-like gadgets and gizmos apparently endorsed by the local Protectorate leader.

With a huge grin splitting her face, she ran over and started picking through the shirts, then she skipped over to the dolls of the wards which all had oversized heads filled with soft fluff.

She was hugging a Vista doll to her chest when she heard a cough from behind her.  
She turned, face going red as she hid the doll in the small of her back, then her eyes locked on Legend, floating an inch above the ground and holding a beige file folder in one hand. She froze.

He looked at her, taking in her rather professional--if strange--costume and the crown-like hood above her. “You must be Queen Administrator,” he said, his face twisting into a smile. It was too soon for him to know if her reaction was one of fear or--

“Oh my god, oh my god! You’re Legend!” Queen Administrator squeaked.

His smile grew wry. “I take it you recognize me,” he said before gesturing at the doorway behind him. “I know you’re just here to fill out some things, but I was really hoping we could talk a little. I’m not sure if this is the best place for it.”

“Why not?”

“Well, this is a gift shop,” he said.

She nodded and waited for him to continue. Her eyes flashed with recognition then pity. “Are you shy because your dolls don’t look like you?” she whispered. “Don’t worry, you’re much handsomer in person.”

“No, no that’s not it--”

She reached over and pulled a pair of panties off a rack and Legend, who had always thought of himself as somewhat charismatic, spluttered to a stop. His face was on the undergarments, smiling for all the world to see. “I’d be pretty embarrassed too. I mean, uh, that’s a pretty bold place to have your face.” Her face scrunched up. “Aren’t you gay?”

“Yes?”

“Then why have your face on panties, you don’t even like girls!”

Legend tried to find the right words to slip out of that particular conversational trap while the back of his mind made a note to call Glenn Chambers about certain marketing choices. He was saved by seeing Lung fly backwards across the parking lot to ram into a PRT van hard enough to send the vehicle skidding sideways.

Queen Administrator jumped at the sound, then looked over to see what was going on outside. “Oh, shucks, I told him not to hurt the buildings but I guess the cars don’t count.”

Leviathan walked over to Lung a clawed hand reaching into the crumpled can only for a dragon to come tearing out of the vehicle and tackle him back out of sight.

“So, Mister Legend, sir, you had papers for me to sign?” she said before pulling out a stool with a grinning Clockblocker on the seat and plopping herself down. Her star-filled eyes never really left him, though they did wander across the forms tucked under his arm.

Legend licked his lips. Part of him wanted to be out there fighting with Leviathan. Another part told him that it might be best to let sleeping dogs lie. He pulled out another stool and stared at how low it was before sitting down. His knees were almost hitting his chest but it brought him level with Queen Administrator and, he had to admit to himself, it was a rather non threatening stance to take. “I heard from Battery and Assault that you’re not interested in joining the Wards?” he asked.

She nodded. “Yeah, that’s right. I didn’t think I’d be getting an offer from you though, of all people.” He could tell she was resisting the urge to clap and move, the chair barely able to contain her excitement.

His smile only grew. Maybe Rebecca was too pessimistic. All he saw was an excited girl who might have been a little starstruck, but she didn’t seem to have a bad bone in her body.

The building shook and a massive dark form moved across the window. He turned in time to see a top-hat move by, then four green eyes were staring into the room from just meters away. His every instinct, honed in half a dozen battles against Leviathan, told him to run, to fight, but he reigned them in.

Leviathan lifted his arm and held up Lung by the scruff of his neck. The dragon’s mouth was open and his tongue was lolling out, though he was still breathing.

“Darn it, Unit Two,” Queen Administrator huffed. “Now I’ll have to apologize to the nice ABB people for hurting their dragon.” She turned to Legend and bowed, cheeks reddening the whole time. “I’m so sorry. Would it be okay if I left mister Lung with you guys?”

“It’s fine? He’s... docile?” he asked. The Leviathan had paused just outside the window and was staring. He had never seen the monster unmoving and it unnerved him to his core.

“Oh, yeah, he’s just a big softy,” she said.

He taught on that for a second. No one had ever called an Endbringer a big softy in his presence before.

Queen Administrator stood up and walked to the window, then placed a hand on her hip and pointed at Leviathan with the other, like someone about to scold a disobedient child. “Get your dirty claws off mister Lung. You’re going to get them all angry at me. I wanted to make a good first impression, not wreck their cars, and hurt mister Lung.”

Leviathan leg go of the supervillain and he flopped to the ground like a sack of potatoes. A half second later the building shook again as the Endbringer stepped away.

“I’m so sorry, Mister Legend, sir,” she said as she turned around and bowed again, the tassels of her dress flopping around her..

“It’s fine,” he said. If anything, it at least gave him a more accurate picture of the way she behaved. “Please, sit, there’s no need for all that.”

She grinned at him and returned to her seat, then began twisting from side to side, the chair squeaking with the motion. “So, I wanted to register as an independent,” she began.

“I see. So Battery was right that you’re not interested in joining the Wards?”

“Not really, sir.”

“Do you mind if I ask you why not? We would give you training and support and would help you make new friends. We can also help you financially, if that’s what you need.”

She laughed, though it was rather weak. “Ah, no, that’s not it. There’re two reasons, really. I’m kind of afraid that you’ll hurt Unit Two and try to poke at him and stuff. I, I don’t want you guys to do that.”

He had to admit that the scientific department would probably jump on the opportunity to study a non-aggressive Endbringer. “I see, and the other reason?”

“You guys failed.” She stared down at the Vista doll she was still holding onto. Her fingers were absently running across the doll’s hair.

There was a long beat of silence in the room. “We failed?”

Queen Administrator nodded, then gestured out of the window. “The gangs, the city. I really love Brockton Bay, it’s where my family is, it’s my home, but it was getting worse and worse. The gangs kept growing and no one was helping. Then the Endbringer attack happened and I... well, you know. But I can’t recall you guys ever doing anything to really help. I know that it’s scary to fight the bad guys, but it was supposed to be your job and you never did it. And so things got worse. I don’t want to be part of that.”

“You want to fight?”

“No, I want things to get better. I have powers and I should be able to use them to help. I have Unit Two, and he’s pretty strong. Why can’t I just clean the ships out of the bay, or help protect convoys of food, or clean up the streets and make people feel safer? I know you guys are trying, but it’s not working.” She was staring into the grain of the table in the end, unable to meet his eyes. “I’m sorry.”

Legend fell back into his seat. What she said was, probably, true. At least to a civilian girl who didn’t see the whole picture. They couldn’t take out all the villains, not without huge casualties or without losing a large portion of their support during Endbringer battles. But then, of all the people to use the Endbringers as an excuse, Queen Administrator was maybe the last one it would work on. “I think you’re right.”

Her head snapped up. “Really?”

He nodded solemnly. “We try our best, we really do, but sometimes it’s just not enough. If you think you can do more good as an independent then I won’t stop you unless you start hurting innocents or go too far trying to hur--” he stopped mid-sentence as a sound like a thousand pressure hoses firing at once came from outside.

Leviathan was still staring at them, but behind him a dozen tendrils of water, as big around as a man’s waist, were picking up the bits of PRT vans that had been tossed around and were ramming them back into place on the frames of the cars. In short order, the Endbringer was fixing the van while standing completely still.

“Oh, that’s clever!” Queen Administrator said before she giggled at the Endbringer’s antics.

Legend approached the window, then looked down to where a crater was being torn into the parking lot by the jets of water that were even now coming out of the sewers. At the rate the water was coming it would soon turn the PRT headquarters into an island.

“Um.”

“Oh, darn, he’s making a mess again, isn’t he?” she said. “Maybe we should get on with the paper signing and whatnot?”

“I think that might be for the best.” He sounded faint.

What followed was ten minutes of Legend trying to guide Queen Administrator through increasingly difficult paperwork while cursing the lack of proper tables in the gift shop. He should have asked one of the aides to stay with him, but he was loath to put a normal person at risk. “And, we need your signature here,” he said, finally pointing to the last box on the last page. “You can sign with your cape name, of course.”

“Awesome!” she said as she wrote her name with a flourish. She looked up and grinned at him. “So, do I need to do the same for Unit Two?”

“The same?”

“You know,” she said, gesturing at the paper, “Sign him up as an independent.”

“I think we’ll be okay. He already has a file.” He stood a across from her, then extended his hand. “Welcome to the light side.”

Queen Administrator laughed and stood up before shaking his hand. “Thanks!” She looked past him and to the door, then back. “Hey, uh, you think I could get you to sign one of your action figures?”

Legend blinked. “Sure, I don’t see why not.”

He saw the way her face turned a deep red and she looked away. “Well, I, uh kindaforgotmywalletathome.”

He smiled then crossed the room and took one of the better figures off the wall and started rummaging for a sharpie behind the counter. In no time he handed Queen Administrator a signed figurine that she hugged to her chest. “Thank you so much!”

“No problem.”

“Can I keep the panties too?” she said, lifting the underwear.

“Uh.”

“Would you sign them?”

“I think the action figure is enough,” he said, his smile straining at the edges.

She shrugged then started walking away. “Fair enough! See you around, mister Legend!”

“Bye,” he called back. Then the girl was out the door and climbing onto Leviathan’s shoulders while a few fearful PRT troopers foamed down Lung’s shrinking body. Legend took it all in. “Well, that was something,” he told the empty room.


	7. In Which Taylor Does the Internet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope the formatting doesn't explode.

She walked out of her bedroom, the morning sunlight the only thing illuminating the upstairs hallway. Her every step was light and she felt as though she were floating. It was like a weight had been lifted from her shoulders.

She had won. Sorta.

Her meeting with the PRT and especially Legend--and wasn’t that exciting?--had gone extraordinarily well. She wasn’t sure how things would pan out from there, but she had the impression that Legend, at least, was willing to work with her instead of against her.

Now she just had to get all the others on the same page and things would, finally, improve in Brockton Bay. The ABB and Empire were both headless now, and while that might not spell the end for either gang, it would certainly slow them down and make them think twice. Taylor hadn’t planned for things to work out as they did, but she wasn’t about to spit on her good fortune.

She wondered if she should spend some time escorting random convoys of food and supplies, if only to warn off any other villains. She nodded to herself. It was worth thinking about.

“Dad!” she called. “I’ll be heading out!”

Her dad was somewhere in the kitchen, though he poked his head out as she made it down the stairs. “And where are you heading, exactly?”

“Ah, the PRT headquarters. I’m going to ask them to see where they need help.”

He frowned a little, then tried to hide it. “You won’t do anything dangerous, right?”

“Nothing I can’t handle, trust me,” she said, her face twisting into a brilliant grin. With a last wave good-bye, she stepped outside and started making her way down the street. Only a few of their neighbours had moved back in, and this was one of the places that hadn’t been hit as hard. Still, it meant that sneaking back to Leviathan was easy.

She found her friend tucked in an alley behind a closed down gas station. He shifted a little as she skipped over to him and wrapped her arms around one truck-like leg. “Did I ever thank you? For just being here?”

{Negative.} Leviathan said in her mind.

“Well, thanks,” she said before squeezing him tight, not that it did much. “Is my costume still here?” she asked and was answered when he shifted to the side and revealed a cardboard box left against one wall. She might have feared the costume getting wet overnight, but she had a Leviathan. “No peeking!” she admonished as she started to change. Soon, she was no longer Taylor Hebert and was, instead, the Queen Administrator. She tossed Leviathan his top hat and he shifted it carefully with the tips of his clawed fingers. “Up!” she said.

With swift motion, Leviathan let a few hundred gallons pour out of his skin and used it to carry Taylor up and onto his shoulder. “Okay big guy, to the PRT Headquarters!” She paused. “Wait, no, let’s go to the Rig!”

As they started to move she wondered what the next phase of her ‘take over the world and/or save Brockton Bay’ plan would be. She had established herself as a counter to the ABB and E88, so maybe poking at the Merchants was next? If she could find them. Then she had to have more presence with the civilian populations. That was easy enough. Maybe she could open a water park, or serve ice cream to kids? That sounded like an excellent idea.

The Endbringer kept walking in what was, for it, a slow and steady pace, but when you were thirty feet tall, Taylor reasoned, you had a decent stride. In no time at all, they were where the Boardwalk had been. Now there were only jutting wooden peers that led out into the open ocean.

There, standing in all of its slightly-wrecked glory, was the Rig. An oil rig that had been moved into the Bay some years ago to serve as a base of operations for the local Protectorate. It was big, it was flashy, and it was probably a logistics nightmare.

“You know, I never did ask you if you’d be able to swim with me on your shoulder,” she said. “I just kind of assumed.”

{Unit 02 is capable of traversing liquid bodies.}

“Yeah, I kinda got that. It’s sorta your theme, you know, but can you do it without getting me wet?”

{Affirmative.}

“Well then, let’s go pay our buddies a visit!”

***

Dragon was always glad to help, especially when those she was helping were such close friends. That’s why, when both Legend and Armsmaster had called her to request aid in Brockton-Bay, she was eager to send one of her newly-repaired drones over.

It didn’t take long to see that that might have been a mistake.

The Queen Administrator, one of the few capes out there that was probably going to earn the infamous ‘The’ title, was the newest and scariest resident of the Bay. Her powers were terrifying in both scale and in what they implied and the girl herself had analysts across the world tearing at their hair with every word uttered.

The footage of her asking Leviathan to go easy on Lung was going viral within certain circles.

In all honesty, Dragon didn’t know what she could do. Attacking the Endbringer was out. It might hurt the girl and most Thinkers agreed that Leviathan would return to business as usual. Talking to her was, as Legend could testify, an exercise in lateral thinking. Trying to force her to do anything was... probably a bad idea.

Dragon decided that the best course of action was probably to just encourage The Queen Administrator to play nice.

So, when at precisely 09:56 EST Leviathan was spotted walking on water as though out for a nice stroll with The Queen Administrator on his shoulder, she spiffed up her social routines, made sure her drone took a non-threatening posture on the part of the Rig nearest the two visitors, and she aimed a very precise microphone towards the pair just as they reached the shields surrounding the Rig.

“Maybe we should knock? Yeah. Try knocking on the shield thing, Unit Two. I don’t wanna touch it in case I get zapped,” The Queen Administrator said. Dragon wasn’t sure if she actually had to talk to Leviathan or if it was just an affectation, but the creature seemed to listen either way. Also, if her caution around Tinkertech was any indication, then the girl clearly still had a decent amount of common sense.

“What do you mean, you don’t know what knocking is?”

Or, maybe she was, in fact, mad. 

“Just hit it with your knuckles hard enough to wake the people inside up,” The Queen Administrator said.

Dragon immediately sent orders to the shield generators to power down, but she was milliseconds too late. The Endbringer brought is fist around and smashed it into the barrier. For just a second it held, then the generators started to whine in protest before something failed and the entire system shut down.

Dragon watched as the shimmering haze that was meant to protect the base failed and disappeared. PRT Troopers across the base started shouting and she had to quickly shut down some of the alarms before they spooked anyone.

The Queen Administrator was pressing her face into her hands. “Not that hard, Unit Two!”

If she could sigh, Dragon would have by now. Instead, she focused on her drone and moved it closer to the edge of the Rig until she was overlooking the oncoming cape. This was going to be one of those days.

***

Taylor saw lots of movement on the Rig but decided to focus on more important matters for now. Notably, what she was going to say about the shield she had just brought down. It was a genuine mistake, but could be construed as an attack on the Protectorate. Better to nip those ideas in the bud. “Can you get us onto the Rig without hurting anyone?”

{Affirmative.}

“Alright, cool.” As soon as the words were out, she felt the world shift around her as a water spout thirty feet across exploded under Leviathan’s feet and sent them hurtling towards the base. The Endbringer shifted in the air and she found herself hugging his neck to stay on his shoulder before he landed with a resounding boom on the deck of the Protectorate Headquarters.

“That works,” she said before pushing herself off Leviathan’s shoulder. He caught her in mid-air again and lowered her to the deck. “Thank you.”

Troopers were running all over the place, though more than one of them froze at the sight of Leviathan standing tall in their midst. That just wouldn't do, Taylor thought. She had to get them to see her friend as a non-threat. That’s what the hat was for.

“Hello, Queen Administrator,” came an accented voice from just a bit behind her.

Taylor turned and came face to face with a metallic behemoth almost as big as Leviathan. The machine was looking down at her through two mechanical eyes set in a face that looked like a dragon’s. She made the connection. “Oh my god, you’re Dragon!”

“Yes, I am. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Queen Administrator,” Dragon’s dragon said.

Taylor rushed over to the gigantic suit and wrapped her arms around it. “Oh, you’re so cute!”

“Um, thank you?” Dragon said. “This is my newest Dragonsuit, Azazel. It’s meant to be intimidating...”

‘Oh, please, as if this little cutie could scare anyone,” Taylor said with a shake of her head. She bent down and patted the foot-long claws that had started gouging holes in the steel platform. It shyly moved back, the canons on its shoulders pointing away as if it was afraid to hurt Taylor. It was the most adorkablest mechanized death dragon Taylor had ever seen. “Oh, shucks,” she said before standing up again. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t introduce myself properly. I’m Queen Administrator, and this is my friend, Unit Two.”

“Yes, I had gathered as much,” Dragon replied. “Would you mind if I asked you why you’re here?”

“I wouldn’t.”

Dragon snorted. “Why are you here?”

Taylor grinned at the exchange and stepped back over to Leviathan. The Dragonsuit followed her, the head moving thanks to a long, serpentine neck. It was an impressive piece of work. “The big guy and I wanted to help. I figured it’d be bet to ask the Protectorate where we’d do the most good.”

“That’s commendable. I’m certain they could use your friend’s... abilities in clearing up the rubble and fixing some of the rougher parts of town.” Dragon shifted her gaze up to Leviathan then back down to Taylor. “Do you mind if I ask you a few questions about your power? It might help to know where you would be best situated.”

Taylor nodded. Dragon was very clever. “Go ahead!”

“Thank you. Oh, and before I forget.” With a dramatic hiss, a panel popped open on one of the Azazel’s shoulders and the suit’s head turned and reached into it. Dragon bent down before Taylor and dropped a small black box that was a hand’s length long and half as wide. “Here, that’s for you.”

With a curious humm, Taylor picked up the box and read the inscription on the side. DragonTech Smart Global Communication Device. Ever more curious, Taylor fiddled with the tin case until the lid opened on a pair of hinges to reveal a smartphone nestled in foam padding. “A cell phone?”

“Yes. One of my own designs. We give PRT phones to most independents that will take one so that we can contact them in case of an emergency. That’s just the newest model.”

“Wow, that’s a lot of newest, first the newest Dragonsuit, then a new model of phone,” Taylor said while she decided how to react to the phone. It was probably able to track her. On the other hand, she wasn’t really hiding.

Dragon laughed and her suit’s head dipped down with the sound. “I’m a Tinker.”

Grinning up at the Tinker, Taylor pulled the phone out of its protective padding and poked at the only button on the entire thing. A dragon flew across the screen, then it was on the home page without any more loading. “This thing is sweet!” she said. “Did you get one for Unit Two as well?”

The suit froze. “Should I have?”

“Well, no, he couldn’t really use it, I don’t think, but it’s the thought that counts, right?” She pressed on the phone icon and the screen was instantly ready. “Wow, it’s fast. Hey, can this thing go on PHO?”

“I’ll bring him one next time I stop by,” Dragon said, her voice hiding some mirth. “And yes, it can. Some heroes prefer texting or using forums to communicate, and PHO is by far the most popular for that.”

Taylor nodded along. “Hey, do you know how to get one of those verified accounts?”

“I do indeed. Did you want one? I happen to know a mod or two. It could save you the hassle of going through the verification process.”

“You’d do that for me?” Taylor clutched the phone to her chest and bounced on her toes.

Dragon laughed and nodded her suit’s head. “Sure. Just give me a few moments... And done! Try logging on.”

Taylor giggled and looked at the phone only to see that it was already on the PHO main page without her having to do anything. That more than confirmed her suspicions about Dragon having some control over the device. She saw that the username field already had Queen_Administrator entered and there was a box under it asking for her to enter a password, then reenter it to confirm.

She typed ‘Endmama’ twice and wondered what conclusions the tinker would draw from that.

 

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“So, Queen Administrator, back on topic, I wanted to know exactly how you went about directing Unit Two. Is it mostly by speaking?”

“Hrm? Yeah, more or less. He doesn’t really talk-talk to me though. I just kind of hear him in my mind. He sounds a bit like a computer. And I don’t mean beep-boop noises. I don’t need Unit Two in my head to hear those.”

Taylor distracted herself by finding the threads about Brockton Bay, then reading through the list.

 

♦Topic: Leviathan Sighted!  
In: Boards ► Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay Discussion (Public Board)

♦Topic: Kaiser Dead. Is Empire Eighty Eight Over/  
In: Boards ► Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay Discussion (Public Board)

♦Topic: Brockton Bay post-endbringer reconstruction  
In: Boards ► Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay Discussion (Public Board)

♦Topic: Search: Looking for loved ones? Come here  
In: Boards ► Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay Discussion (Public Board)

♦Topic: PRT / Protectorate response: Kaiser deceased New Hero: Queen Administrator  
In: Boards ► Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay Discussion (Public Board)

 

Dragon’s head shifting drew her attention away from the screen. She stared at Leviathan for a bit. “Are you saying that the End-- that Unit Two is a construct?”

She shrugged. “I dunno. Maybe he just thinks that way? But it sounds very... logical. Like he has directives and priority lists and all that. Like one of those smart computers in movies.”

“Like an artificial intelligence.”

Taylor nodded. “Something like that, yeah.”

 

♦Topic: PRT / Protectorate response: Kaiser deceased New Hero: Queen Administrator  
In: Boards ► Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay Discussion (Public Board)

(Showing page 01 of 146)

►Dep.Director_Renick (Original Poster) (PRT ENE)  
Posted on May 17, 2011:

Hello everyone,

This is an official statement from the Brockton Bay branch of the Parahuman Response Team and the local Protectorate East-North-East. If you have any questions feel free to ask them and we will try to reply as quickly as we can. We understand that these are trying times, and want to do everything in our power to make things easier for everyone. We hope you are all patient with us as we are still running an investigation on certain matters and the situation in the Bay is complicates these procedures.

To begin, some good news. The following members of the Empire Eighty Eight are currently in PRT custody:  
-Hookwolf  
-Stormtiger  
-Cricket  
-Fenja

We would also like to inform everyone that Kaiser, the leader of the Empire, died on May 16th after a short battle with a new cape. The Empire capes were captured during an attempt to steal from a supply convoy. More details will be released during an official press conference next week. Date to be determined.

This brings us to our next piece of news, there is a new independent hero in the bay; Queen Administrator. Images of Queen Administrator in costume are available here: [LINK]

Note that Queen Administrator has been friendly and cooperative with both the PRT and Protectorate but has not expressed any interest in joining the Wards at this time. Her power is a Master ability that allows her to control a creature similar in appearance to the Endbringer Leviathan named Unit Two. We encourage anyone that sees Unit Two to remain calm and cool. He is docile and under Queen Administrator’s control.

Thank you,

Deputy Director Rennick  
PRT ENE

■

►StigmaLord  
Posted on May 17, 2011:  
Ding Dong the Nazi’s dead!  
Does anyone know who done it?

►Lurking_In_The_Light  
Posted on May 17, 2011:  
‘a creature similar in appearance to the Endbringer ‘  
Bullshit.  
That thing was at the PRT HQ. There’s another thread about it [Here] It took down Lung. It has Hydrokinesis. It’s fast as fuck. It’s tough as hell. It’s Leviathan. If it looks like an endbringer, swims like an endbringer and quacks like an endbringer...  
Now what in the hell are we going to do about the Endbringer in our midst?

►Jedi-Fish  
Posted on May 17, 2011:  
Nothing about additional relief and supplies? Not all of us care about the cape scene.

►LoliZerg  
Posted on May 17, 2011:  
@-Stigmalord  
I heard from a friend of a friend that it was Queen Administrator. She basically told the nazis to stop and they did. Then Kaiser tried to skewer her. Not-Leviathan crushed him against a wall via super-sonic-sewer water. 

►Bagrat (The Guy in the Know)  
Posted on May 17, 2011:  
Cross-Posting from my own thread [Here] because I know some folks stick to official threads only and my job (not that I get paid for this) is to keep you all informed. 

So, first thing’s first: The E88 has pretty much kicked the bucket. There might be a new group based around Purity, but it’s sketchy at best. We’ll see. Also, Rune was captured along with the rest, but she managed to break out before even seeing the inside of a cell. Good job, PRT!

Now, onto Kaiser. He’s dead. Very dead. I got my hands onto a copy of the autopsy report. Every blood vessel in his body burst. Then he was slammed into a wall hard enough to go through it. If it wasn’t for his armour he might have exploded. Yeah.

On that note, the person that put an end to Brockton Bay’s own nazi king was none other than The Queen Administrator. He tried to attack her. She sicced an Endbringer on him. Kaiser lost.

Yes, let’s talk about The Queen Administrator. First, the ‘the’ is practically obligatory. I have a friend, that friend forwarded me a copy of her threat report. It seems that it’s circulating around to all the PRT bigwigs. I’m posting the report summary below:

Name: Queen Administrator  
Classification : Master 12  
Danger: A-Class (Pending S-Class)  
Disposition: Independent Hero  
Location: Brockton Bay  
General information:   
Young female between the ages of 14-16. Costume is made of strips of blue and green cloth woven into a hooded robe. Wears a cloth domino mask beneath hood. Open to conversation and generally polite. Her Mastered subject ('Unit Two,' Leviathan: Brute/Mover/Shaker 10) acts with incredible violence against any perceived threat.   
Personality:  
Friendly with all PRT and Protectorate personnel so far. Occasionally speaks to ‘Unit Two.’ Possibly suffering from post traumatic stress disorder or shock. She was noted to have talked openly with certain villainous elements without any aggressive behaviour.  
Powers:  
Controls the Endbringer Leviathan. Control possibly extends to other Endbringers.  
Recommended Strategies :  
Do Not Engage. Do Not Antagonize. If Subject demonstrates aggressive behaviour prepare city for wide-scale evacuation. 

I also got reports of Queen Administrator riding on Leviathan (Unit Two) ‘s shoulder while patrolling with the super villain Hellhound before the villainess returned to her current base of operations unharmed and alone.

If you’re unable to translate that, I’ll do it for you: Brockton Bay has a teenaged girl who can control Endbringers and she likes taking it out for walkies.

What does this mean for the rest of us? I’ve no idea, but I’ll be over here, not in Brockton Bay, watching and praying for all of you.

►XXFanX  
Posted on May 17, 2011:  
Wait, does that confirm that Unit Two is actually Leviathan? What’s with the fake name?

►PlasticMarine  
Posted on May 17, 2011:  
Here come the Fallen. Will they worship or be angry?

►SideEgg  
Posted on May 17, 2011:  
@-XXFanX it could be a psychological thing. She’s trying to either tell herself it’s not an Endbringer, or trying to trick others into thinking it’s just a really convincing projection.

►Winged_One  
Posted on May 17, 2011:  
Oh my, I was thinking of visiting the Bay, Is there anything in particular I need, or should I just wait for a more opportune moment? 

►FluffyMaud  
Posted on May 17, 2011:  
@-Winged_One Just stay home, sweetheart.

 

“Queen Administrator?” Dragon repeated and Taylor jumped.

“I’m so sorry, I was reading and... well, they’re talking about me, you know?

The Dragonsuit bobbed its head. “I know what that’s like, don’t worry. So, we were talking about Unit Two and the methods you use to communicate? I just want to be sure you can give him complex instructions.”

“Of course I can. But he can think for himself too. Like, if I told him to move the Rig from here, to over there.” She pointed off towards the city. “Then he’d figure out how to do it on his own. He’s like one of those AI things, but one of the good ones, like Skynet.”

“Skynet?”

“Yeah, he just wants to do his own thing, which is following orders. Before I met him his orders were pretty much ‘genocide every few months’ but now he listens to my orders instead. He’s pretty happy just doing that, you know? Like, Skynet just wanted to be left alone to play with her robot buddies, that’s all.”

Dragon was quiet for a long time. Probably googling the Terminator series or something inside her awesome suit. Taylor shrugged and leaned her back against Leviathan’s flank as she brought her new phone back up. The battery was still at 100%. This thing was great.

It didn’t take her long to find a thread about herself. She skipped the first post by Bagrat which was pretty much just another copy of her threat report and started skimming through the messages. She hummed as she started typing.

 

♦Topic: Queen Administrator  
In: Boards ► Boards ► Places ► America ► Capes 

(Showing Page 21 of 21)

►Thumpz  
Posted on May 18, 2011:  
Yeah, so she shows up, THEN Lung shows up, then Leviathan wipes the floor with him. That’s the order of events and I’m sticking to it.

►DoctorSomebody  
Posted on May 18, 2011:  
Y’all don’t get it. She left right after. Like, a minute after Levi beat Lung up. That means that either her conversation with the PRT peeps only lasted a minute, or it took the entire time and she wasn’t focused on Leviathan doing his thing, and considering how much he was holding back, that’s kind of scary. 

►Olmen  
Posted on May 18, 2011:  
@-DoctorSomebody   
You’re trying to say that she’s not a direct master, more of a ‘do this’ and walk away master?

►BAJay  
Posted on May 18, 2011:  
Anybody able to confirm the rumour that Legend is in town? If so, was he here because of QA or for something else?

►Aquarius  
Posted on May 18, 2011:  
Whelp, I’m moving out of the Bay. See you, Brockton Bay. Won’t really miss you!

►Storm_Walker  
Posted on May 18, 2011:  
This really sucks for the Asian community. They’ve had to deal with the Empire for a long time, and say what you will about Lung, but he was at least able to keep his turf clean.

►Tom_Mikoto  
Posted on May 18, 2011:  
Get bent. Lung needed to be put down. Same as Kaiser. At this rate there won’t be gangs in the Bay no more, and I, for one, am willing to live with the nice Endbringer if that means not worrying about the rage dragon or the nazis. 

Now, if someone could taje care of the Merchants that’d be awesome. They’ve been moving into old E88 territory for the past few days and have made a mess of thngs. I don’t know if you’re too high to fear the new Queen of the bay or if they think they’re too small to get noticed, but they’ve still been hitting some of the shelters and peddling their shit to everyone.

►KommanderGoliath  
Posted on May 18, 2011:  
Damn, to be a bug on that wall. I wonder what Legend and Queenie talked about?

►Queen_Administrator (Verified Cape)  
Posted on May 18, 2011:  
@-KommanderGoliath  
Mostly we signed paperwork and I got him to autograph a (collector’s edition) Legend action figure (squee!). Oh, and I tried to get him to sign some panties but he said no. I think it’s cause he’s gay though. Think I should bring boxers next time?

►Winged_One  
Posted on May 18, 2011:  
Oh wow! A response by the cape of the hour. Hey, when I get to Brockton Bay, would you mind so much if I stop by to see you?

 

Dragon seemed to wake up because she looked around with her mech and then focused on Taylor. “I see,” she finally said. “Anyway. I sent a few messaged on your phone. Those are the dates and times that construction crews will be showing up across the city. Mostly they need more manpower on the scene. It’s grunt work, but that’s what’s needed right now. Also, there’s a list of convoys heading towards the city. Most have cape support, but they’re still a prime target for attacks by villains.”

“Awesome!” I said. “Thanks Dragon. If you send me your number, we could keep in touch, if you want,” I said.

“That would be nice. I’ll add myself to your contacts. Feel free to text me at any time. I don’t really need to sleep. Oh, and do tell me next time you want to visit the Rig, or better yet, tell the PRT so that they can lower the shields.”

Taylor laughed sheepishly. “Yeah, sorry about that! Anywho, I’ll be off. People to help, breakfast to eat. Keep in touch! Oh, will you be staying around the Bay for a long time?”

“For a few days, at least,” Dragon said.

Taylor gave her a thumbs up. “Cool. Maybe we can help people together.” With that, she motioned Leviathan closer, then climbed onto his shoulder. “C’mon boy, I want me some breakfast.”

The two of them jumped off the edge of the Rig, leaving a very confused Dragon behind.


	8. In Which Taylor Cleans the City

Taylor was quickly growing to love her new phone. Not only did she get to troll the PHO forums and answer the most inane questions while avoiding the serious ones, she also received pings from the local PRT about the city’s ongoing reconstruction efforts.

For now they seemed to be focusing on cleaning up the major highways that bisected the city as well as the roads in the docks and near the Boardwalk, basically, all the places that had been hit the hardest during the attack.

She figured that they wanted to clear things out to be able to bring dump trucks and whatnot into the ruined parts of the city. So, with a satisfied smile, she opened the last message from the PRT and sent a reply.

>>Queen_Administrator: Thanks for the information. If I want to assist with the clean up, is there somewhere in particular I should go?

>>PRT_15731: There’s a tent set up on Lincoln and Fifth. Agents from the different clean-up and construction crews are coordinating from there. There are also a few local heroes on-site. 

>>Queen_Administrator: Thank you! Could you tell them that I’ll be there in a few minutes?

>>PRT_15732: Will do, Queen Administrator. On that note, would it be possible if you showed up without Unit Two? Most of those on-site are civilians and they might be spooked by his presence.

>>Queen_Administrator: Can do!

Taylor slid her phone into a pocket and tapped Leviathan on the shoulder twice. “I’ll be over there,” she said while pointing off towards her destination. The pair had stopped a block away and Leviathan slipped into an alleyway. “Okay, so, stay here for a bit, unless things get hairy, you know?”

{Affirmative: Unit_02 will follow Temporary Directive to remain stationary unless Temporary Directive interferes with Primary Directive.]

“Exactly!” She reached out, then wrapped both arms around Leviathan’s leg in a quick hug. When she looked up to him, her face split in a huge grin and her cheeks reddened. “I’ll see you in no time at all, okay?”

{Affirmative.}

Walking down the street on her own was a little different. She had almost forgotten what it was like to be all on her own, and yet it had only been a few days since she met Leviathan for the first time. She felt smaller, seeing the streets from the height of a normal person as opposed to on the back of a giant.

It was a heady thought, and she wondered if many capes felt that way or if her situation was unique. Still pondering the question, Taylor arrived on the indicated intersection to find it a chaotic mess of trucks and trailers parked haphazardly across the road. Men in hardhats were milling about, some of them sipping at still-warm coffee while others were trying to undo the mess that was a multi-company construction project.

In the centre of it all was a pavilion tent, something that should have belonged at an outdoor wedding but was now host to a bunch of tables where men were arguing over maps of the Bay. Parts of the tent were obscured by cloth walls but she saw a few more tables behind them when a man shifted one aside to pass.

Taylor gingerly stepped around puddles of water on the street until she noticed that the water would draw away from her path. Humming to herself, she tried to stand tall despite all the looks being shot her way.

“Um, hello?” she said as she entered the tent. A few heads turned her way, but they were busy, and one strange cape in their midst wasn’t reason enough to stop the work. Taylor had to resist the urge to pout.

“Don’t worry too much,” someone said from a little deeper in the tent. “They’ll come around in a bit. They just don’t like repeating themselves. You are here to help, right?”

She looked deeper in the tent and found herself staring at a young woman in a white cheerleader-ish outfit floating an inch or two off the ground. “Glory Girl?”

The heroine smiled. “The one and only,” she said.

“Hey, what am I, chop suey?” Shielder stepped out from behind Glory Girl and looked at Taylor, then his eyes went wide and he searched beyond her and around the tent. “Holy shit, I saw you on PHO. Is he here?”

“He?” Taylor said with a squeak. Not one, but two capes! This was incredible. She wanted to squee and hug the heroine before her and--

{Host-Queen_Administrator: Mental functions indicate outside influence. Enact Primary Directive?}

“Outside influence?” Taylor said aloud brining the two New Wave capes up short. “Wait, you mean I’m being Mastered?”

{Affirmative.}

Glory Girl spun around, scanning the site while Shielder pulled out a phone from somewhere and was halfway through dialing for help when Taylor continued. “Where’s it coming from?”

{Three meters North-North-East from Host-Queen_Administrator’s current location.}

She looked around, took in her bearings, then stared at Glory Girl. “Glory Girl is a Master?” she squeaked.

Silence finally fell across the tent. “What?” the heroine said.

Taylor took a quick step back, then she paused. Glory Girl was a well-known and respected hero. If she was really a Master then someone would have done something about it by now. “Uh.”

Glory Girl’s face twisted in indignation. “Hey, you can’t just go and accuse people of anything like that,” she said.

“Gee-gee, lower your aura, you don’t want to pick a fight with her,” Shielder warned his cousin.

“I’m not picking a fight,” Glory Girl said. “She’s the one accusing me of being a Master. It’s not even a Master effect, just a Shaker effect.” She waved towards Taylor.

“I’m sorry,” Taylor replied, raising both hands in surrender. Her hands wanted to shake like her knees were doing but she held them back, she couldn’t let others see her afraid, not again. “I didn’t mean to accuse you of anything. Heck, I’m a Master so I’m not going to throw rocks in my glass house, you know? It just my, uh, friend told me that I was under an outside influence and that it was coming from you.”

“You’re a Master?” Glory Girl said. Taylor couldn’t help but notice the way the girl floated back just a bit.

“Yeah, so it’s like I said, I’m not accusing you of anything. My friend just warned me is all.”

“And where is this friend of yours?” Glory Girl shot back.

“Ah, he’s around. I didn’t want to scare anyone by having him around.”

Shielder lowered his phone, his eyes fixed on the two girls. “Vicky, drop it. I’m sure Queen Administrator’s not here to make a fuss--”

“You’re the Leviathan girl?” Glory Girl said. “Wait! It told you that I was dangerous?”

“Um, not dangerous, exactly? Taylor said. She really, really didn’t want Glory Girl to be angry at her, but the heroine was floating a little higher, her hands balled into fists at her side. “He just warned me is all!” she mumbled.

Glory Girl snorted then came closer. “Oh, so now the bloody Endbringer is more trustworthy than I am?” Her hand reached out as if to poke at Taylor’s chest.

The tent shifted. There was a gust of humid air that made a few papers fly off the nearest table and had Taylor’s costume fluttering around her. She blinked, then looked at the hand stopped a few inches away from her, then she let her gaze follow up from the hand and to Glory Girl’s arm which had a huge claw clamped around it.

Leviathan was on the ground, arm reaching into the tent to grab Glory Girl while all four eyes stared at the girl.

Taylor heard Glory Girl’s gulp and saw Shielder going white as a sheet behind her. “Unit Two, that’s enough,” she said. “I think she knows better than to try and hurt me, she’s a hero after all.”

{Affirmative.}

Glory Girl tried to yank her arm out of the Endbringer’s grip but all she succeeded in doing was to cut herself on his sharp claws. As soon as Leviathan let go she flew back a half dozen meters and hugged her arm to her chest, eyes wide and panicky.

With a put-upon sigh, Taylor reached down and tore out a strip of her costume, then with slow steps, as though approaching a wild animal, she moved closer to Glory Girl and spoke in a near-whisper. “I’m sorry about that. Here, let me look at your arm. I’m not the best at first aid, but we should still wrap that up until your sister can take a look at it, yeah?”

The silence in the tent continued while Taylor wrapped the cloth around the gash in the heroine’s arm. It wasn’t much of an injury, just a skin-deep cut along her arm. “There, all better,” she said before grinning at the hero.

‘Yeah, yeah, all better,” Glory Girl said as she backed away a little. She was running the thumb of her free hand over the makeshift bandage.

Taylor felt bad for the poor girl. She had clearly been spooked something fierce by Mr. Fish. Maybe she needed a hug? Hugging Leviathan had made her feel much better. She wondered if Glory Girl would like it if she ordered him to hug her--

{Host-Queen_Administrator: Mental functions indicate outside influence. Enact Primary Directive?}

Taylor’s head whipped around to stare at Leviathan and that simple motion alone had a bunch of people jumping in startled surprise. “Again?”

{Affirmative. Unit-02 ennact Primary Directive?}

“No, we’re not going to kill her just because she has a weird aura thing,” Taylor said. She turned back to Glory Girl who seemed a little pale. “Is there a way for you to turn it off? Unit Two is really concerned.”

{Suggestion: Unit-02 can manipulate the target’s biology and remove Host-Aura_Projector’s ability to influence Host-Queen_Administrator’s mental functions.}

Taylor hummed in thought for a moment, then shook her head. “Nah, I don’t think lobotomizing her until her aura goes away is a good idea,” she said. “What if you mess up and she gets hurt?”

Glory Girl went from pale to green in under a second and what had been a few meters of distance almost doubled as she backpedaled. Her cousin stepped up, placing himself between Taylor and the heroine with both arms raised in surrender. “Now now, no need to lobotomize anyone, even if it would finally get her to stop talking about her boyfriend.”

“Eric!”

Taylor giggled and nodded. “Yeah, if only lobotomy were an acceptable way of getting out of awkward conversations. That would make life a little easier.”

Shielder shared a smile though his was a little shaky, then he looked over his shoulder at Glory Girl then back. “Okay, so her aura is obviously a problem, and probably her attitude too, but we can’t do much about that, god knows we’ve tried. So how about we keep some distance between the two of you. I’m sure once you get to know each other it won’t be as big a deal, right?” His smile seemed a little forced on the edges but Taylor chose to ignore that. He was doing his best to keep things peaceful and that was fine in her books.

She taught about it for a moment, but it was a sound compromise. “That works for me.”

Someone coughed and Taylor turned to find an older man staring at the lot of them as though they were nothing more than a bunch of jumped up teens. Even the Endbringer standing in the background didn’t seem to phase him. “If you lot are done we’ve got work to do and I’m the unfortunate soul that has to debrief you three.”

Taylor nodded and the two New Wave kids did the same. “Good. When I was told we’d get support I was expecting actual support, not three kids, but we’ll do what we can with what we have.” He pointed to a map of the Bay that was on the table behind him. “To be honest, just about every street needs cleaning. I’m halfway tempted to just give the lot of you some bags and tell you to start picking up, but I hear that some of you can replace some of our bigger machines without the fuss of having to move them on streets that are essentially impassable.” He stared at Leviathan with all the passion of a dead sloth.

Taylor raised a hand as if to ask a question, and when the man nodded she went on, “If I understood, you guys are all here to clear off the streets, that’s it?”

“There’s a bit more to it then just that, missy, but essentially yes. Once the roads are cleared and any buildings that need demolishing are brought down, we can start repaving the main arteries throughout the city. You see those containers,” he said while pointing off towards the other end of the street.

Three trucks with massive shipping containers on trailers were waiting there. “We want you to fill them with any junk that’s laying on the street. If you have a chunk that’s too big, then bring it to the other trucks on Lincoln and Fourth. We’ll be moving them throughout the day as we go along.”

“And if we have a lot more then that?” Taylor asked. She was starting to have an idea in the back of her mind.

He looked at her, one eyebrow raised. “We’re building a landfill just on the exit of the Bay.”

“Great, thanks!” Taylor said.

“Hn. Right, well you lot stay out of our way and let us do our work, and maybe you can take a few PR pictures later.” With that, the man left, passing between Taylor and Leviathan without even staring at the Endbringer.

“Wow, that was... something,” Shielder said.

Glory Girl scoffed. “Bit of an ass,” she said. Her eyes turned to Taylor and there was a competitive glean in them. “Hey, Endbringer Girl.”

“It’s Queen Administrator.”

“Right. Are you up for a bit of a challenge?” she said.

“Oh?”

Her smile was almost feral. “The one who picks up the most trash wins. We start as soon as we agree on terms and finish... let’s call it by one thirty.”

Taylor nodded. She was never terribly competitive, but if it got her and Glory Girl back on the same page then it was definitely worth it. “You’re on! Loser has to pay for the winner’s lunch?”

“I’m down for that,” Glory Girl said her face twisting into a wry grin. She glanced at Leviathan but seemed to have put her fear aside for the moment. “I’d shake but,” she said, gesturing at the space between them.

Shielder shook his head. “A minute ago and you were at her throat and now you’re gambling with her?”

“Hey, a girl’s gotta eat, and food tastes best when it’s free... speaking of!” With that, Glory Girl shot off like a bullet towards the next street over. She avoided all the foot traffic by the simple expedient of flying over them all.

“Sorry about her,” Shielder began.

Taylor waved him off. “It’s okay. Mostly a misunderstanding, I think. No one was really hurt, so it’s alright.” That said, she turned to Leviathan. “I want that free lunch, big guy. So, could you clean all the streets in the Bay?”

{Affirmative.}

“Without killing anyone or destroying any buildings and while dumping all the junk where the old man said?” Taylor asked.

{...Affirmative.}

She wondered for a moment which part of that gave him pause, but didn’t care enough to ask. “Awesome! This’ll really help the city, I think, and it’ll make people think we’re less scary too,” she said.

Shielder took her in, then the rather docile, top-hatted Endbringer by her side. “That’s really important to you, isn’t it?”

“Hm? You mean looking less scary?”

“Yeah. I mean, we do a lot of PR stuff for New Wave, but it’s not so much about making people be less afraid of us and more about encouraging people to talk.”

Taylor nodded. “I understand, yeah. It’s just that the big guy and I have different problems. My power isn’t as... non-threatening as any of yours. People are afraid of Unit Two, and they’re afraid of me too. If I want the city to be a better place, then I need to be able to help, and no one will want my help if they’re more afraid of me than they are of their problems.” She gestured across the worksite where the men had slowed down to stare at the Endbringer in their midst. It didn’t matter that Leviathan wasn’t moving, he was still huge and imposing.

“If you want our help looking less... scary, then give us a call. We do a lot of stuff like this, especially since there’re so many projects going on at once. If you’re seen with us it might help your image.” Shielder gestured at her, then pointed over his shoulder more or less where Glory Girl had gone.

She beamed at him. “Thanks. But, for now, I have a lunch to win.” That being said, she waved goodbye to the young cape and stepped out of the tent, aware that he was following her with his gaze. “Okay, Mr. Fish, I don’t know how much you heard back there, but this is the plan: I want you to clean up the streets. Can you do it?”

{Task parameters?}

“Hrm, mostly make sure you don’t hurt anyone and dump the junk either in those trailers over there or in that landfill the old guy mentioned.”

{Scope of Task?}

Her brows furrowed as she taught for a moment. “Brockton Bay, I guess.”

{Understood. Beginning Task.} Leviathan said, then he quickly proceeded to do nothing.

Taylor waited, shifting on the spot for a few long seconds before looking around and shrugging. “Okay. I’ll be inside looking for a snack, you, uh, do your thing.”

It didn’t take long after she re-entered the tent for her to find that there was a table covered in boxes of doughnuts and coffee machines. She was picking her way through these when she heard a distant rumbling sound, like a huge truck driving by. Probably, she figured, one of the construction vehicles moving around.

Taylor almost jumped out of her skin when her pocket vibrated. She froze, then realized what was going on. Dropping her sprinkle-covered honey glazed doughnut on a plastic plate, she fumbled around until she pulled out her phone and accepted the call. “Queen Administrator here, how can I help you?”

“Hello Queen Administrator, it’s Dragon,” came a very, very calm voice from across the line. “There’s a bit of an emergency, and I was hoping you could help us.”

Taylor straightened, doughnut forgotten. “What is it?”

“There are a series of underwater surveillance systems all across the East coast and deep into the Atlantic, they monitor ship traffic and water levels across the ocean in order to help predict the weather and Endbringer movements. I’m looking at a few hundred reports that the water levels in the Eastern part of the Atlantic are dropping by an average of a quarter inch and there’s a massive wave of turbulence heading towards the East coast of the United States.”

“Uh, so there’s a wave coming this way?”

There was a pause. “That would be accurate, yes. But it’s less of a wave and more of a--” Dragon’s voice grew distant and garbled for a moment before static filled the line.

She pulled the phone away from her ear and stared at it for a moment, then she heard the rumbled form outside growing steadily louder. There was screaming too, men’s voices rose into panicked shouts.

Stepping outside she found that people were running all over the place, the noise of it nearly covered by the all-consuming rumble. It was easy to follow the gazes of the workers and see why they were afraid.

A wall of water was raising up in the ocean.

The top of it was so high it was visible over the two and three storey buildings nearby, a frothing wall of churning water tinted such a dark blue it was almost black.

Taylor walked over to Leviathan and stood in the gap between his arms. “Are you the one doing that?”

{Affirmative.}

Her shoulders slumped. “Alright, but make sure you don't hurt anyone.”

{Affirmative.}

The world around them grew darker by the second. The sky that was moments ago only filled with a few sparse clouds was enveloped by an all-consuming blanket of water. There had to be millions of gallons, Taylor realised as she looked up. The wall was so high above that the nearest clouds where pushed away in its wake.

Then it came crashing down.

The screams were swallowed up in what had to be the loudest sound she ever heard. Like a waterfall but a million time bigger.

The ground shook and Taylor had to grab onto Leviathan to keep steady as the noise grew ever louder.

Around the nearest corner came a rushing wave as tall as the tallest buildings in the Bay, a veritable wall of water that rushed towards them at the speed of an oncoming train. Even Taylor shut her eyes when the wall hit, then she blinked them open as she felt little more than a few stray droplets hitting her face.

The wall was splitting around them.

Before she could even take it all in it was over. The water receded deeper into the city, rushing towards the coast like a huge claw being pulling towards the ocean. She watched it leave, the world around her brightening as the sky reappeared and in a brighter blue then she had ever seen it.

“-Minitstator! Queen Administrator!” a tinny voice said.

Taylor pulled her phone back to her ear. “Yes?”

“Are you alright?” Dragon asked.

“Oh, I’m just dandy. Unit Two cleaned the streets for us,” she said and as she looked around it was clear that she was telling the truth.

The road where the wave had passed looked as though it had been pressure washed clean. The walls of every building were almost shining and whatever little pile of junk had been left to rot along the roadside was long gone.

The only places that weren’t perfectly clean were the spots with people in them. Most of the workers were on the ground, shaking and shivering. A few looked as though they were crying and more were just staring off into the distance without moving. But they didn’t look injured or anything, so they were probably alright, she reasoned.

“...Cleaned the streets?” Dragon said. She sounded a little faint.

“Mm-hmm,” she said as she stepped out from Leviathan’s shadow. He had done a very good job cleaning things up. The city ever smelled nicer, like salt water. “So, uh, did you need me for anything else?”

“No?” Dragon said.

“Awesome. So, I’ve got a bet to win. See you around, alright?”

“Uh, goodbye?” the Tinker said before the line went dead.

Taylor was grinning in self-satisfaction when she walked up to the mean old man that had given her instructions earlier. He was staring at all the others as if waiting for them to get together and get back to work. “We did a fair bit, but Unit Two didn’t touch any place where there were people.”

He stared at her for a long moment, then pulled a pack of cigarettes from within his jacket. “Well, can’t say I didn’t ask for it,” he muttered. “Thank girl. Now piss off, you’re scaring my boys.”

Taylor held back a huff and just nodded before walking back towards Leviathan. She was just in time as Glory Girl and Shielder were flying back at a rather sedate pace. With a burgeoning grin she ran over to the pair. “So, where’re you taking me out to eat?” she asked.


	9. In Which Taylor's Picnic Gets Slaughtered

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Creative Use of Naughty Words

Taylor slouched on her bed, back bent at an odd angle so that her head was upside down over the edge while her feet kicked against her mattress with a constant thump-thump-thump. She held her new-ish phone, acquired all of a week ago, and now an inseparable part of her body. The phone’s display light illuminated her face and the letter discarded on the floor next to her bed.

PHO and most of the other national news sites not blocked by a paywall were still going on about the ‘Great Brockton Bay Tsunami.’ It seemed as though unleashing the biggest wave this side of the ice-age on a single city might have been a bit much for some people.

It had already been a week and the PRT was still ‘advising’ her to stay home and not order Unit Two to ‘manipulate enough water to create tiny shifts in the planet’s rotation.’

She figured they were all over-reacting. It was only water and no one got hurt. In fact, the entire city was a lot cleaner now. They should have called it the Great Brockton Bay... Spring Cleaning Waterfall of Happiness... Taylor huffed and pouted at her room. She wasn’t very good at names.

Her eyes drifted up to the floor and towards the letter. She stopped kicking her legs long enough to turn herself over onto her stomach. It allowed her better read the letter and skip the address lines and get to the meat of it.

Dear Miss Taylor Herbert,

We, the staff of Winslow are happy to announce that the school will be reopening on Monday the 30th of May, 2011. All non-essential classes will be cancelled until the beginning of the spring 2011 term. 

Please note that there will be additional security on-campus and that for the coming weeks the school day will be shortened from 8am to 1pm to accommodate the situation happening in Brockton Bay at the moment. No weapons will be allowed on-campus.

Thank you,

Susan Blackwell  
Principal

That was tomorrow. Emma would probably be there, as would the rest of them. She shut her eyes and took in a deep breath. “I need to get out.”

{Host-Queen_Administrator requires extraction?} A familiar and comforting voice spoke in her mind.

“Yeah,” she said to the room. “But not the sort you can provide, big boy, I need a distraction.”

{Unit-02 is capable of providing a distraction. Start Genocide protocols?}

Taylor giggled and flipped over and around. “No, no, it’s alright,” she said as she got to her feet. “Tell you what though, I think I’ve been stuck at home for long enough.” She whipped out her phone and, with a few expert swipes of her thumb, opened the messenger app while her other hand opened a drawer and searched for a clean pair of jeans.

>>Queen_Adminstrator: Hey, Dragon, I’m going out in a bit.

>>Dragon: You mean in-costume, with Unit Two?

Taylor loved the way Dragon answered almost as soon as she hit send. She hadn't dared talk to the Tinker too much over the last week, what with her probably doing important Tinker-y stuff up in Canada, but she still felt a thrill every time she talked to the woman.

She pulled on a sweater over her shirt, then returned her attention to her phone.

>>Queen_Administrator: Yeah! In-costume. I can’t stand being at home anymore and Unit Two hasn’t gone for a walk in forever. I think he might be getting bored, you know?

>>Dragon: I can’t tell you what to do, Queen Administrator, but I strongly suggest that you stay indoors. I believe the PRT would advise the same. What were you planning on doing anyway?

Taylor hummed to herself as she opened the door and made her way downstairs. It wasn’t noon yet and she’d kinda skipped breakfast. Maybe she could go out for lunch? But she’d need money for that, and most restaurants were closed anway. Oh! She had an idea.

>>Queen_Administrator: I was thinking of preparing a picnic and going to the park with Unit Two.

>>Dragon: You do know that it’s raining right now. It’s hardly the kind of weather you’d want to have a picnic in.

Taylor blinked then looked outside. Dragon was, as usual, quite right. A light smattering of rain was coming down and covering the--very clean--streets in her neighbourhood. She shrugged and made her way to the kitchen.

>>Queen_Administrator: That’s no big deal.

>>Dragon: Please don’t ask Unit Two to change the weather again.

>>Queen_Administrator: You worry too much.

Slipping her phone into her pocket, Taylor scanned her kitchen, then started preparing sandwiches and shoving cans of pop into a cooler. Ten minutes later she had enough food to feed an army as long as that army had no more than three people in it.

Nodding to herself, Taylor grabbed her cooler, slipped on a raincoat, and went outside.

The air still smelled of saltwater even a week after Leviathan’s little cleaning wave, though it was better than the smell of trash and whatnot that had been stinking the place up before that.

The Endbringer in question was in his hiding spot next to a gas station a few blocks down. “Hey!” Taylor said as she slipped into the alley.

{Unit-02 greets Host-Queen_Administrator.}

“How have you been, big guy?” she asked as she dropped her cooler next to the box that hid her costume. “Oh, and turn around. No peeking while a girl changes.”

The Endbringer shifted until his four-eyed gaze was firmly locked onto the entrance of the alley, anyone trying to peek on her would have to get by him first. {Unit-02 is combat ready.}

“You’re always combat ready, I wanted to know how you were,” Taylor said as she slid out of her coat. A few droplets of rain slid down her neck and she shivered. “Oh, and can you make it not rain around us. Just around here though, Dragon doesn’t want us messing the weather too much.”

{Complying,} Unit Two said a moment before the rain shifted and started falling everywhere but where the two of them were standing. {Unit-02 is performing at standard operating levels.}

“Good!” Taylor said as she adjusted her costume and brought her hood up. “So, I’m going for a picnic at the park. Wanna come?”

{Unit-02’s capability to carry out the Primary Directive will be facilitated by nearness to Host-Queen_Administrator.}

“Awesome!” Taylor cheered before making grabby motions at Levithan’s shoulder. The Endbringer lowered himself until she was able to climb up. “Oh, and could you grab the cooler? Since you’re so big and strong?” she teased. Leviathan’s hand wrapped around the cooler, sharp claws biting into the off-white plastic. “Okay, so, I was thinking the park near Lincoln Ave. Any objections?”

{Negative.}

“Well then, off we go!” Taylor said. She watched the dreary, wet world around them for a few blocks, noting the way cars swerved around whenever they caught sight of her and Leviathan making their way along the sidewalk while ducking under power lines. After a bit though, she got bored and pulled her phone out again.

>>Dragon: Queen Administrator, could you wait a moment before leaving with Unit Two? I’m sure we could find something less disruptive to do.

>>Dragon: Queen Administrator? The PRT would really appreciate it if you allowed them to escort you to the park.

>>Dragon: Hello?

>>Dragon: Queen Administrator?

>>Queen_Administrator: Hey, Dragon, Unit Two and I are heading out for that picnic I mentioned, want to join us? I made ham and cheese sandwiches!

>>Dragon: I really can’t. But I’m sure someone from the local Protectorate would love to join you!

>>Queen_Administrator: Nah, it’s okay. I’ll find someone interesting on my own. You don’t need to get anyone to come with me.

Taylor shifted on Levithan’s shoulder. She had really just extended the invitation to Dragon to be nice, she didn’t actually expect the Tinker to be able to accept from all the way in Canada.

Did Dragon really have to send someone from the Protectorate over? It was like having someone set up a playdate. She couldn’t quite pin down what she felt about that, but it was something close to embarrassment, like when someone brought their parents to school and they tried to act cool and help them make friends. She didn’t want the other capes to think that she couldn’t make friends on her own!

The problem was, she realized, that she didn’t know how to make friends on her own. “Hey, Unit Two, how do you make friends?”

{Unit-02 is currently allied to Unit-01 of 20 and Unit-03 of 20 as well as all currently inactive Units. This alliance was created on the basis that all Units would share Primary Directives. Initial Primary Directives were installed at time of Creation.}

“Wait, you have two friends,” Taylor said. An Endbringer had more friends than her. She huffed and drew herself up a little. “Okay, new objective, make some friends.”

{New Objective added.}

“Cool. So, uh, I guess I’d need to actually meet someone. It’s a good thing I brought extra sandwiches,” she muttered before casting her gaze across the street in search of potential friend materials, but that was silly, she wasn’t just going to spot someone who would become her friend. Not unless... “Hey, Unit Two, could you find someone interesting for me?”

{Unit-02 is capable of actively scanning the environment for any organic lifeform.}

“Could you find someone interesting? Preferably between here and the park, and on their own? You know, someone my own age and kinda like me, I guess.”

{Affirmative. Scanning.} Leviathan paused a bit, and when they approached the next intersection he turned left instead of keeping straight like she thought he would.

She was about to ask him where he was heading when she noticed a girl standing on a sidewalk a little ways ahead. They were in what had been Empire territory only a while ago, a more upscale part of town where the streets were lined with italian and greek restaurants and the apartment buildings had little gardens out front.

{Target ‘Interesting Human matching approximate characteristics of Host-Queen_Administrator’ found.}

Taylor watched the girl as Leviathan came to a stop half a dozen meters away. She didn’t cower or shake or run away, she just stared at Taylor with an expression she couldn’t quite decipher. It was something between terror and, if Taylor wasn’t misjudging the girl, panic. Awe, maybe.

She waved almost shyly from her perch and watched the girl’s eyes go wide. Something was almost familiar about her but Taylor couldn’t put her finger on it. “Hello there!” she called down.

Taylor noticed that she had been pulling a wheeled luggage bag behind her. “Um, hey?”

“Are you alright?” Taylor asked.

“I’m fine, super, awesome, fan-fucking-tastic,” the girl said, her voice rising in pitch with every word.

“You sure?” Taylor pushed while tilting her head to one side.

“Yup,” the girl said. Her eyes snapped from Taylor to Leviathan then back. “Uh, have a nice day?”

“Thanks!” Taylor said. She wanted to kick herself. She wasn’t this bad when she was talking to Legend the other day, or with Dragon, why was it so much harder to talk to someone her own age. She said the first thing that came to mind and hoped that she didn’t sound too weird. “Hey, do you want a sandwich?”

The girl opened her mouth, then closed it. “What?”

“It’s ham and cheese,”Taylor said weakly. She wondered if Leviathan could dig a big hole that she could bury herself in.

“I... if I say no will you kill me?” she asked.

Taylor scoffed. “Don’t be silly. I wouldn't kill anyone over a ham and cheese sandwich.” She cringed at her own words. It seemed as if she had only grown more awkward since school had closed down. “I meant, do you want to go to a picnic, with me? Um, unless you’re busy. You’re busy aren’t you? Damn. I’m sorry.”

She saw the girl take a deep breath and look down for a few long seconds. “I, thanks for the invite, but I’m not hungry. Uh, I’ll just...” She pointed off down the street. “Be on my way, okay?”

“Okay, bye!” Taylor said as she waved again. “C’mon Unit Two, we should go.”

She slumped against his side. That had been a mess and a half. Maybe she could ask Dragon for help? But no, she doubted Dragon of all people needed help talking to people. Dragon was just awesome like that. Maybe she could find a book about it?

Just as the Endbringer started moving again, she heard the girl muttering to herself. “Fuck, she even looks like the fucking Fairy Queen now.”

A jolt of recognition shot through Taylor and a half-buried memory came back. “Rune?”

The girl, who might have been Rune, tripped over nothing and stumbled a few steps before stopping. “I’m sorry, what’d you say?”

Taylor stood up on Leviathan’s shoulder and spun towards the girl. “You’re Rune, aren’t you? From the Empire. Hey, didn’t I get you arrested?”

“No, nope, that wasn’t me. I have no idea what you’re talking about.” The Girl-Who-Might-Be-Rune shook her head violently from side to side, her knuckles went white over the handle of her luggage.

Taylor looked down with narrowing eyes, the girl fidgeting under her speculative look. “You know, if you were Rune, not that I’m saying you are, then maybe I might be willing to forgive you if you came with me to the park and had a proper picnic.”

“You want to hold me hostage, in a park? To have a picnic?” Maybe-Rune said as if testing the waters of Taylor’s sanity.

“Well, when you put it like that it sounds kinda weird,” Taylor said. “Uh, nevermind. This was a bad idea.”

Maybe-Rune stared up at her for a long time, so long that Taylor began fidgeting on the spot under her scrutinizing gaze. “You’re serious, aren’t you?”

“About what?”

“The picnic thing. You really want to have a picnic with me. Just ham and cheese sandwiches, in the rain, at the park, because why not?”

“Well, I was talking to Dragon, and I realized that eating at the park all on my own would be kind of boring.”

Maybe-Rune’s face shifted from confused to incredulous. “So what, you just asked the first person you saw to go with you, while riding on Levithan’s shoulder?”

“No! I didn’t ask just anyone. I had Unit Two look for someone... like me, I guess.” Taylor hunched into herself. Wow, admitting that made her look like such a dweeb.

“Fuck it.” Maybe-Rune turned around and slapped the extendable handle of her suitcase down until it was flush with the luggage. She then pressed a hand against the side of case and let it go, only for the case to float up into the air and hover at about head-height. With a grunt of effort, Definately-Rune jumped onto the box and made herself comfortable on her makeshift chair. “Lead the way, Endbringer girl.”

“Really?” Taylor asked.

Rune shot her a strange look. “Look, I’ve got about a million reasons to say no and bugger the fuck off and maybe like, three to say yes. Let’s just go out there, eat some sandwiches, then I can get the hell out of this shithole city.”

With a tap on his shoulder, Leviathan started walking again while Rune floated just off his shoulder. “You’re leaving Brockton Bay? Why?”

Rune sighed and pressed her face into her hands. “Your trigger must have really messed you up, I swear,” she muttered. “Okay, so let me list it out for you all simple like: The E88’s fucked. My family’s fucked. My home’s fucked. There was a giant fucking tsunami last week that scared me shitless. There’s an Endbringer living in the city, which happens to be fucked.” She sighed. “I’m just getting out of here while the going is good. Hell, I’m surprised you’re not trying to leave.”

Taylor shrugged. “I don’t know. Brockton Bay is just home. And I don’t think most places would be very accepting of, well, me.”

Rune snorted. “Yeah, no shit.” She glanced over at Taylor as if to see her in a new light. “You got it rough, huh?”

“A bit, I guess. The PRT don’t want me to do anything so I’m pretty much stuck at home all the time. I got bored with that though, that’s why I’m here. Just a picnic, you know, something to get out of the house.”

“Just a picnic and a bit of kidnapping?”

Taylor laughed and looked away. “Ah, that wasn’t part of the plan. Sorry?”

“Uh huh.” Rune might have been something of a risk taker, and maybe she wasn’t the wisest as far as teenaged girls went, but she knew how to weasel like the best of them. “Tell you what, you don’t try to arrest me anymore, and I won’t comment on the whole kidnapping thing on PHO.”

“You use PHO?”

Rune snorted. “Yeah, I use PHO. And I know that you use it, they won’t shut up about you on there.”

Taylor smiled and looked down, focusing on the road as it passed below her. “It’s kind of nice and most people are more honest on PHO then in real life, you know?”

“You mean they’re bigger assholes?” Rune barked a laugh. “Yeah, I get you.”

“What’s your name?” Taylor asked suddenly. “Not that you have to tell me or anything, I just--”

“Cass.”

“I’m Taylor,” Taylor replied. She beamed over at the other teen who just rolled her eyes but the corners of her lips were twitching up. “Ah, there’s the park!” Taylor said as they arrived next to a deserted playground. There was a sandpit off to one side with brightly coloured jungle gyms installed through while the rest of the little park was dominated by a hill surrounded by trees. “Get us on the hill,” she told Leviathan.

Moments later Taylor landed on soggy grass and looked around her. The view from here wasn’t great, but they could still see a good ways into the city, enough to see the dozens of cranes poking out of the cityscape and the cargo ships waiting out in the Bay.

“Urg, this is really shit weather for this, you know,” Cass said as she landed next to Taylor and her sneakers sunk into the ground.

“Oh, right,” Taylor said. “Hey, Unit Two, could you dry the top of the hill for us?”

{Affirmative.}

The grass rustled as a layer of water lifted from the ground and floated a few inches in the air, then it shot out in every direction, scattering downhill. “Tada!” Taylor flopped to the ground and ran her fingers through now-dry but still soft grass. “Hey, toss the cooler over,” she told the Endbringer and squeaked when he did just that.

She caught the plastic bin with an oomph and fell onto her back. Then she started giggling while hugging the box. “Oops.”

“Christ, he took that literally huh,” Cass said. She eyed the Endbringer warily as she sat down cross legged near Taylor. “You okay?”

Taylor let her laughter die down and sat up straighter. “I’m fine,” she said before placing the cooler next to her and opening it. A few minutes later and the two girls were munching down on ham and cheese while staring at everything but each other.

She knew that she had to break the ice, but she didn’t know how to actually do that without being too strange. So, she did the next best thing and just asked the first thing that came to mind. “So, how’s school?”

Cass choked on her ham. “Seriously? ‘How’s school.’ What are you, my mom?”

“Sorry,” Taylor said.

“Nah it’s... okay, school is lame as shit, but it’s closed down so who gives half a fuck? You know?

Taylor nodded. “Yeah. I’m really, really not looking forwards to going back.”

“Then don’t. Just... say fuck it and do your own thing. You’ve got the Endbringer to do shit for you, so I doubt you’ll be aiming for a steady job in the future. And I’m pretty sure you could just go to whatever university or college or whatever you want as long as you’re masked. Seriously, who’s gonna stop you? Eidolon and his happy buddies?”

“But if I don’t go back they’ll win,” Taylor said with a tiny voice.

Cass chewed on her sandwich for a bit, her attention on Taylor before it drifted away. “You know, you’re pretty strong right now. Might not last forever. If I were in your shoes I’d use that power for everything it’s worth.”

“Imagine letting Unit Two sit on the school’s front lawn while classes are in session,” Taylor said and she couldn’t stop herself from giggling at the mental image. It helped when Cass laughed along with her.

A scaly hand wrapped itself around Taylor’s waist and before she could ask what was going on she was torn aside, claws digging into her sides hard enough to knock the breath out of her.

Looking up, she saw that Leviathan was holding her close to his chest, all four eyes focused on the hill she had been sitting on only seconds before.

A noise, like a bag of trash being pelted at a wall, drew her attention back to where she had been. Cass was now floating a dozen feet off the ground, eyes wide and panicked as she too took in the mess that their picnic had turned into.

Trash was strewn all over the hill, empty bottles next to tin cans and rotting food, all scattered with the spot she’d been sitting in as the epicentre. “What?” Taylor asked.

There was movement near the treeline, then a man shambled out from between the trees. His face was twisted in a rictus of laughter while his eyes twitched from where Taylor now was to where she’d been. “Shit. You little knob-licker sure move fast. Much fucking fast. No hit but trash like you trash fuck.”

He stumbled forwards another step, his long trench coat, covered in grime and dirt, dragging along the ground. “Shit piss. Not going to miss, no!” he screamed. Raising a hand, the man made grabbing motions and all the trash on the hill peeled itself off the ground and rushed back to him, coating his arm and torso before it all glowed a bright blue.

Leviathan moved again, his arm shooting out to bat a ball of junk out of midair.

“Holy crap, that’s Skidmark!’ Cass said.

The man, Skidmark, screeched a single long, incoherent note. The ground around him started to glow with bands of bluish purple while all the trash rushed back to him and splattered onto his body.

There was a single clap from nearby and Skidmark paused, his scream cutting off with a gurgle. Another man stepped out of the treeline, this one wearing a simple rain coat and smiling as if he was about to greet a neighbour and wasn’t just barging into the start of a cape fight. “My my, what a hideous specimen. Bonesaw tried to clean up his vocabulary but I think she might have made it worse. It was something of a patch job, you see?” His smile grew and he turned his full attention Taylor. “Hello, Queen Administrator. I had something of a proposition for you.”


	10. In Which Taylor Makes a New Friend

“Hello, Queen Administrator. I had something of a proposition for you,” the man said.

“Eww!” Taylor said, her face twisting in disgust. “Aren’t you like, my dad’s age? That’s probably illegal.”

There was a long beat of silence in the park, filled only with Skidmark’s harsh panting and the sound Rune’s hand made when it met her face.

He laughed. “Oh, I knew you’d be fun,” he said. “No no, nothing like that, I assure you. See, I’m part of this wonderful little group of friends. Strong people that are often... misunderstood by the powers that be. So we stick together, like a family of--.”

Then Taylor’s phone rang in her pocket. She sighed and motioned with one finger to Jack, the universal ‘wait a second’ gesture.

“We’re a family that looks out for each other, and I think you would be a wonderfu--”

“Shhh!” Taylor said to him as she pulled out her phone and pressed it to her ear. “Queen Administrator here, how can I help?”

“Taylor! You need to get out of there, now!” came Dragon’s tinny voice. She sounded panicked, terrified even.

“What? Why? And since when do you know my name?” Taylor asked.

“There’s no time for that, I’ll explain later. Jack Slash and the Slaughterhouse Nine were seen entering the Bay this morning. You need to get to the PRT HQ as soon as you can.”

Taylor looked up from the phone and towards the man that had been talking at her. He looked a little sheepish at being told to wait. “Hey, is your name Mister Slash?”

“Why yes, yes it is,” Jack Slash said before bowing at the waist. “A pleasure to meet you.”

“Pleased to meet you too!” Taylor replied with a grin. “I’m Queen Administrator, but you already knew that, I think.”

“I did indeed!”

“Taylor!” Dragon’s voice over the phone was loud enough to grab her attention again. “You need to get out of there, now!”

“Why? Mister Slash has been really polite so far,” Taylor said.

“He’s a supervillain! No, he’s worse than that, he’s one of the most vile men around. You need to get out of there Taylor. Please.”

{From Unit-02 to Host-Queen_Adminstrator. Permission to eliminate Host-Broadcast_Manipulator in order to carry out Primary Directive?}

Taylor sighed. All she wanted was to have a nice picnic on the hill and maybe talk to her new friend. Why did things always need to get complicated? “Hey, Mister Slash, Dragon says that you’re a really, really bad person, is that true?”

His smile grew wry. “I’ve been called worse.”

“Huh,” she said before pressing the phone back to her ear. “He said that he’s been called that before.”

“Of course he has. He’s killed thousands. Taylor, no matter what you do, don’t listen to him, he’ll try to manipulate you, to trick you. Please, just run.”

She looked up at the man standing next to a frothing Skidmark. “Dragon said that you’ll try to manipulate me. Is that true?”

“Well, in a manner of speaking. All conversations are social manipulations. But I don’t have any sort of Master ability, if that’s what you’re trying to ask,” he said. His lips were still quirked upwards and he sounded as though he was holding back some mirth.

Taylor nodded and spoke into her phone again. “He said that--”

“I could hear him, Taylor. You can’t trust what he says.”

With a deep breath, Taylor looked at the phone, then at Jack. “Okay, I’m putting you on speaker phone because I’m tired of repeating everything to everyone, alright?” She leaned over the phone over the sound of Dragon’s protests and pressed the biggest button on the screen hoping it was the right one.

The line went dead.

“Crud.”

Jack shrugged. “It’s alright. I’m sure she’ll call you back.”

“It was still really rude,” she argued to which he nodded.

“Yes, but you can apologise. It was an honest mistake,” he said. “Now, as I was saying, I’m part of a social club of sorts, and we wanted to ask you to join us. There’s a bit of a test, but nothing that you’d have a hard time with, I’m sure.”

Taylor was about to go on, but Rune slid down from the air between herself and Jack. “Okay, this has gone on long enough,” she said, her face twisted in a glare that did little to hide her fear. “You are not going to recruit my friend into your fucked up band of fuck ups.” She flung her arm forwards and a rock the size of Taylor’s head tore out of the ground where they’d been sitting a few minutes ago and shot out towards Jack.

His eyes narrowed at the girl floating on her luggage above him, then a white and black blur ran out of the treeline and slapped the rock out of the air.

Jack bent down and around, his hand now holding a folding knife that he flicked across his chest.

With a hiss, Rune fell back, blood spraying out of her chest and neck in an arc that had it splashing across their picnic spot. She gasped and fell backwards off her luggage, tumbling head-first towards the ground.

“Levi!” Taylor screamed.

The Endbringer jumped forwards, claws outstretched and filling with water to catch the girl with a gentle splash. Cass was saved from the fall, but not from the naked woman that shot into the air towards the Endbringer.

He lifted his other arm up to block the woman only for her hand to swipe through his arm at the wrist and tear it off. It was enough that he had time to move Cass back and away from her though.

“No!” Taylor screamed even as Leviathan hopped back, cradling the injured Rune to his chest. He landed with a thump right next to her.

“Now now,” Jack said. “Siberian, dear, please, none of that.” He motioned with his hands--his knife having disappeared at some point-- with both palms open in a gesture of peace. “I’m terribly sorry. The Siberian can be a little protective you see? She just wanted to make sure I was safe after your friend attacked me.”

The naked woman, the Siberian, paused. She looked between Jack and Rune, then slowly stepped back with the grace of a hunting cat. When she was next to Jack he patted her on the shoulder before turning his attention back to Taylor.

Taylor was shivering, her whole body shaking as her eyes locked onto the stump that had been Leviathan’s hand, then at Rune who was grimacing and trying to bottle in the pain. In the few weeks since she had met Leviathan she had never really felt any visceral fear. She wasn’t unhurtable, but he was always there to keep her safe. Sure, she knew that she wasn’t the best socially and that kind of scared her, but not in the same way, not with the same intensity as the fear that slammed into her mind when she saw her best friend get hurt trying to save someone for her.

“I’m sorry Mister Jack, but I’m going to have to go.”

{Unit-02 suggests retreating in order to maintain the Primary Directive. Optional and Suggested Secondary Objective: Eliminate threat.}

“No, no let’s just go,” she whispered.

“Ah, ah!” Jack said as he waved a finger at her like she was a naughty girl. “We really want you on our team, Queen Administrator. But first, we need to see how you are, not your big friend.”

“For fuck’s sake,” Rune said. “Move!”

Taylor moved. She jumped up towards Leviathan, the Endbringer lowering his arm just enough that she could step on and wrap herself around it before he spun on one heel and swung his tail out behind him.

A whip of water shot out behind the Endbringer. The Siberian, who had started to move towards them, spun around to grab Jack and Skidmark by the shoulders a split second before the whip smashed into them.

Claws digging into the ground, Leviathan flew off the top of the hill and towards the deeper part of the city. “The PRT HQ!” Taylor shouted as she grabbed on for all she was worth.

Leviathan landed on one of the main roads, then spun around and ducked low to the ground. Taylor had to snap her eyes closed as something roared above them and exploded against an office building.

Blinking, she took in the mechanical monstrosity straddling the middle of the road. A huge six-wheeled truck, each wheel on its own axel linked to a chassis covered in steel plates. There were no doors or windows, only a pair of guns large enough that Taylor could have stuck her closed fist into them with room to spare. That, and a head attached the the very front of the car, the face covered by a pair of welder goggles that almost hid the pipes leading back into the makeshift tank.

“You! You’re the bitch! You’re the one that had your fucking pet ‘clean’ the city. He took my cars. He took all my projects away!”

“That Squealer?” Rune muttered, her voice growing weak. Taylor leaned over the girl, then touched her chest only to have her hand come back red.

“Unit Two, we need to move.”

{Enacting Primary Directive.} Leviathan said.

The Endbringer jumped up just as a supersonic pile of trash blasted under him and rammed into a drugstore. When Leviathan landed, it was to unleash a waterfall that poured out from all over his body. The water shot down the road and towards the cackling Squealertank who fired her cannons again.

Watery tendrils snapped up and batted two rounds out of midair, letting them smash into the roadway with a resounding boom. Then the water rushed onwards and wrapped itself around the tank. “You fuck! You fucking fu--” Squealer’s rant was cut short as the water looping around her crushed her tank.

The supervillain’s eyes bulged as the tank was tossed aside.

“No. Bad fuck. My cunt shit!” Skirmark screamed as he rushed towards Leviathan, riding on trash piled over glowing marks on the ground.

Leviathan looked at the man.

He exploded.

Taylor flinched back. There was a little voice in the back of her head, one that was usually pretty quiet, that reminded her that humans were mostly water. Leviathan pulled her closer to his chest then started running again. Already his hand was regrowing out of the stump, fleshy grey skin expanding out like a sponge being filled with water, but more bloody and nasty.

They rounded a corner, Leviathan pushing against a building with one foot to dispel some of his momentum before he jumped over a van and towards the middle of the road.

Taylor was hanging on for all she was worth when she felt a coil of water wrapping around her face. She almost screamed as it tore off her glasses and flung them aside, then she heard a high-pitched keening noise, like a million fingers running on the edges of crystal goblets.

Every window in the street burst apart, sending cascades of glass towards the ground. Taylor tried to bury her face against Leviathan’s side but she couldn’t take her attention away from the glass as it spun around and formed a wall that cut them off from the end of the street.

Leviathan stopped, claws digging trenches into the asphalt as he spun around and aimed for one of the shorter buildings.

A blur of white and black slid before them. The Siberian grinned up at the Endbringer, eyes crazed as she took in the two girl’s in his grasp.

The wall of glass exploded outwards, rushing towards Leviathan and the girls.

Taylor shut her eyes and hugged Leviathan close. “I’m sorry,” she told her best friend.

There was a scream, not Shatterbird’s glass-shattering yell, but a screeching call that burrowed into the back of Taylor’s head and had her shivering.

A white form crashed down from on high, coming down feet-first like a diver aiming for deep waters. It crashed into the van parked on the corner, crumpling and burying the vehicle into the crater that formed around it.

The Siberian popped like a soap-bubble.

The creature that had flattened the van stood tall, wings expanding around it and catching the light of the sun overhead in such a way that, in Taylor’s blurry vision, it looked as though a halo surrounded it.

[Unit-03 responding to Unit-02 request: Additional Friends. Friendship protocols activating!]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now things start to get funny.
> 
> As I mentioned elsewhere, the bulk of this story (if I don't post the entirety of it) is on Spacebattles.com and SufficientVelocity.com feel free to pop on over.


	11. Chapter 11

In Which Taylor Negotiates a Trade With a Very Good Girl

The Simurgh, Ziz, the Hopekiller. An ethereal beauty whose false humanity was barely concealed by feather and wing. When she first sang it inspired humanity to look up to her, the angel made real. Then her song twisted, taking with it the sanity of her listeners.

For nine years, The Simurgh flew, and with her travels came destruction and madness. She was feared the world over. The Endbringer with the fewest volunteer capes and the least casualties, at least at first.

Her appearance was the harbinger of the end for any city. Friends turned on friends at at the sound of her voice. More than one hero had been put down like a rabid dog for listening for too long, more than one city had been walled off and forsaken.

Taylor looked up at the Endbringer, eyes squinting to take her in. “Are you naked?”

The Simurgh turned her face away. [Not Naked. Feathers.]

“Feathers don’t count as clothes!” Taylor shouted up at the Endbringer.

The street was quiet for a moment, the wall of onrushing glass paused, the cars swerving all over coming to a stop while the panicked drivers within stared at the two Endbringers on the road. The only sound was the tinkling of glass and the drip-drip of liquids coming out of the van The Simurgh was still standing on.

“Hey, Taylor,” Rune said. “Could you, I dunno, get me to a hospital, or something?”

“Oh, skittles!” Taylor said. She looked between Leviathan and Rune, then up to The Simurgh. “Uh, hey, do you happen to know where Panacea is?”

[Affirmative.]

“Could you tell me?”

[Affirmative.]

Taylor huffed. “Where is she?”

[Amused. Hospital. East.]

“You hear that?” the asked Levithan.

{Unit-02 on same communication band as Unit-03 and Host-Queen_Administrator.}

“Awesome, then let’s go.” Taylor pointed off towards what she hoped was East. Rune looked drowsy, and had stopped grimacing in favour of staring off into the sky and blinking slowly. That was probably not a good thing.

Leviathan started running again, long lopping steps that brought him to the side of a building which he vaulted onto and climbed with one hand, his newly-reformed claws digging into cement to drag him up.

Taylor knew that she had to do something about the Simurgh, but Rune was hurt now, and she needed helping first. She just hoped that the Simurgh wasn’t going to be upset with her.

“Where do you think you’re going?” a girl asked from above them. Taylor looked up to see Shatterbird, wrapped in layers of glass with sword-like pillars floating behind her and flashing with every colour in the rainbow. “Jack told me that I had to test you, which means you’ll need to get by me first.”

“Uh,” Taylor said.

Shatterbird grinned, then took a deep breath and sang. Her voice was like liquid crystal, sending glass spiralling around her in a double helix the size of a semi-trailer. Every window for a mile around them cracked and exploded, adding glass to her pillar.

The Simurgh rose up behind Taylor and Leviathan, took one look at Shatterbird, then screamed right back.

If Shatterbird’s song was pure, like crystal chiming in the wind, then the Simurgh’s was like a crystalline foghorn on a boat about to ram into shore.

A wave tore through the air, shifting back all the glass spiralling around and tearing past the top of the city like a tiny tornado that had every tree in a mile wide cone bowing down and every building creaking under the strain. Shatterbird, who was in the middle of it all, disappeared in a puff of glass dust and blood.

[Smug. Path cleared,] The Simurgh said. Her wings all quirked upwards and she folded her arms across her chest, legs in a wide, victorious stance.

“Thanks!” Taylor said before tapping on Leviathan’s shoulder. “C’mon, you get us there and I’ll call ahead to make sure Panacea knows we’re coming.” That said, Taylor stretched around and rummaged in her pocket until she found her phone and glared at the screen until she found Dragon on her very short list of contacts.

>>Queen_Administrator: Hey, Dragon. Unit Two and I are heading over to the hospital where Panacea’s staying. 

>>Dragon: Queen Administrator! How are you? Are you okay? How badly are you injured?

>>Queen_Administrator: I’m not injured at all, but one of my friends got hurt. She was with me at our picnic when that Jack guy showed up. 

>>Dragon: I’m calling ahead to the hospital, but I can’t get through. Do you want directions to the PRT HQ, they can have a medical team ready on site in less then two minutes.

>>Queen_Administrator: Nah, my source tells me that Panacea’s at the hospital. Maybe they’re just busy? 

>>Queen_Administrator: Oh, also, the Siberian is dead. 

>>Queen_Administrator: Maybe Shatterbird too. 

>>Queen_Administrator: But it’s not my fault I swear! The Simurgh did it.

>>Queen_Administrator: Anyway, see you later! I’ll call when I’m not so busy.

>>Dragon: No, wait! What did you mean about The Simurgh?

>>Dragon: The Siberian’s dead?

>>Dragon: You’re going to hang up again, aren’t you?

Taylor slid her phone into a pocket and looked around. They were making good time by hopping from rooftop to rooftop. Brockton General stood out of the cityscape, one of the bigger buildings in that part of town. She wondered if she’d need to pay parking fare for Leviathan.

The Endbringer crashed in front of the emergency room doors and lowered himself to the ground. Taylor jumped off, then rushed over and helped lower Rune to the ground. When she searched around them, it was to find the entire parking lot empty. No one was racing out to help which was really quite rude.

Frowning, Taylor grab onto Rune, sliding an arm under the girl’s. “Can you still stand?” she asked.

“Mmhmm,” Cass said. She managed to stay on her feet but was still bleeding and Taylor figured that she wouldn’t be going far on her own.

“Unit Two, make yourself scarce, but if anyone tries anything bad, stop them, okay?”

{Affirmative. Additional Directive: Protect location.}

Pulling Cass alongside her, Taylor slipped into the hospital’s ER only to find everyone in the room staring at nothing. The only noise was the ventilation and a TV in the corner of the waiting area where there was a warning from the PRT about the Slaughterhouse Nine being in town.

{Host-Queen_Administrator entering area affected by pathogen created by Host-Biological_Enhancer.}

“Can you do something about it?” she asked.

{Affirmative. Preparing genocide protocols.}

“What? No! You can’t solve every problem by killing it. Can you, I dunno, clean the air?” She gestured with her free hand, hoping that her random waving was read as ‘made the bad stuff go away’ and not ‘kill things.’

{Preparing localized Hydrokinetic sweep. Unit-02 advises Host-Queen_Administrator wait until sweep is complete before proceeding.}

Taylor stopped in the threshold of the hospital waiting room, knowing better than to step inside when her Endbringer told her not to. The building rumbled, every pipe and vent shaking for a few moments. A water dispense near the entrance blew apart, firing a jet of water into the room that immediately broke apart into a cloud of steam that scoured the room. All Taylor felt was a mildly humid brush across her face while a wall of steam rushed by her.

When it passed, she sniffed the now very-clean air and nodded. “Thanks!” Stepping in with Rune by her side, Taylor beelined towards the reception desk. “Hey, Unit Two, can you do anything about all these folks? They seem a little sick.”

{Unit-02 can remove pathogen by force using hydrokinesis.Unit-02 is unable to return local lifeforms to previous state without damaging cerebral processes. Proceed?}

“Hrm, no, we’ll see if Panacea can help them first, yeah?” she said just before stopping before the reception desk. “Hi,” she said to the glassy-eyed woman behind the counter. “Do you know where Panacea is?”

“We’re not supposed to move,” the woman whispered, her eyes fixed somewhere four inches over Taylor’s right shoulder.

“Um, okay. But can you tell me where Panacea is?”

“Seventh floor.”

“Thank you, miss reception lady.” Holding her friend close, Taylor walked to the elevator and pressed the button for the seventh floor. A minute later the elevator pinged and the doors opened to reveal a corridor empty save for a few foldable wheelchairs, some beds and other bits and bobs that she couldn’t identify beyond ‘hospital stuff.’

An idea struck her and she moved to one side and spent a precious minute unfolding one of the wheelchairs before lowering Rune into it. “That’ll be faster,” she said as she installed herself behind and started pushing. “Now, if I was a Panacea, where would I be?”

She was growing a little anxious when she heard someone talking from deeper in the corridor. Seeing as most people she crossed were just standing around unmoving, she figured that following the noise was her best bet.

“Now now, Amy, think about it, we could be the best of best buddies!” A young, girly voice said. “I do the big things, and you fix them up all pretty. We both work with meat, I thought you’d appreciate my handiwork.”

“Meat? My sister is not meat!” someone screamed.

Taylor slowed to a stop next to an open door, the voices were coming from within. She stepped away from Rune and knocked twice. “Um, sorry, am I bothering? I’m looking for Panacea.”

There were four people in the room. A girl in a canary-yellow dress, wearing an apron and wringing her hands. When she turned her blonde ringlets followed the motion and bounced around her heart-shaped face. Behind her, leaning against the farthest wall right next to the room’s only window was a tall, tan-skinned man. His clothes were worn but clean, all save for the massive hatchet leaning on the ground next to him which was grimey with dried blood.

The other two Taylor recognized. Glory Girl was sitting on a bed, a smile on her lips as she stared at the far end of the room while Amy Dallon, Panacea, was standing between her sister and the little girl.

Squirming under the attention, Taylor swallowed. “Uh, I don’t want to interrupt, but my friend’s hurt real bad.”

The little girl smiled wide then tilted her head to one side. “Hey, Mister Slash was supposed to talk to you. You’re the Endbringer girl, right?”

“Yup. And I did talk to him, but he was rude and he hurt my friend so I left.” Taylor frowned at her. “Are you part of his group?”

“Yes! I’m Bonesaw, and the big guy over there’s Hatchet Face. Is Leviathan with you? I really, really want to see if I can make him better!” She bounced on her toes and clapped her hands.

“No, he’s waiting outside. Sorry. Also, I’m not very happy with your group,” Taylor said. She wagged a finger at Bonesaw whose eyes widened. “You interrupted my picnic.”

“Oh gosh darn, I’m so sorry. But we could always have another picnic. And it’s raining anyway. Maybe tomorrow? It’s supposed to be nice and sunny.”

Taylor shrugged. “I don’t know. We’ll see.” That being said, she turned to Panacea who was staring very hard. “So, could you help my friend? She’s right here.”

“How are you still moving?” Panacea asked.

“Uh,” Taylor replied. “You mean, my body? The normal way, I guess.” She moved her arms and legs-looking for a moment like an drunken extra in a Michael Jackson music video--just to see if her limbs still worked. They did.

“I... I can’t help your friend... no, nevermind that! Don’t you know who she is?” Panacea said, pointing right at Bonesaw’s face.

“Uh, Bonesaw?” Taylor said. “She just introduced herself.” Bonesaw pressed a hand over her mouth and stifled a giggle. “Is she why you can’t help my friend?”

“Yes!” Panacea shouted. “I, my sister’s hurt, I can’t just leave her here,” she said, pointing at the very quiet Glory Girl who was still just staring and smiling.

“I can watch over her, if you want,” Taylor offered. Panacea’s face twisted and a few tears slid down her cheeks. Taylor was immediately on high alert. She could understand feeling bad about her sister being hurt, but she was Panacea, she could fix things. “What’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong?” Panacea said, choking back a sob that turned into a bark of laughter. “What’s wrong is, that... that bitch!” She pointed at Bonesaw.

“Language!” Both Taylor and Bonesaw said at the same time.

Panacea went on as if she hadn’t heard either. “She fucked with Vicky’s head, turned her into a vegetable. I, I can’t do brains.” The girl started shivering, her arms wrapped around her chest to keep it all in but she couldn’t stop herself from shaking.

“Oh,” Taylor said. She turned to Bonesaw. “Did you really do that?”

“I wanted Panacea to become my sister, but that’ll never happen if she doesn’t work past her limits.” Bonesaw pouted. “She’s always going on about not doing brains, but she’s obviously able to, she’s just afraid.”

“Limits are there for a reason, Bonesaw. Sometimes they’re important,” Taylor advised.

The man in the corner grunted, then stood a little taller. “Gotta go,” he said, making a motion towards the wall over the bed where a clock sat.

“Oh, huckleberries,” Bonesaw said. “Can’t we just take them all with us?”

“How about a trade!” Taylor said before anyone could really move. “Panacea, you fix my friend up, Bonesaw, you undo what you did to Panacea’s sister, and uh, I’ll invite you to my next picnic?”

Bonesaw seemed to consider this for a moment, but Panacea jumped in first. “There’s no way in hell that I’m letting her touch Vicky!”

Taylor’s shoulders slumped. So much for that idea.

Hatchet Face grunted. “Just take ‘em both,” he said before picking up his hatchet and taking a step towards Taylor.

The wall right next to the window exploded outwards. Everyone flinched and turned towards the hole in time to see a white arm shoot into the room. Delicate fingers wrapped around Hatchet Face’s head and pulled back.

Thanks to the hole in the wall and the window right next to it, they all got to see the man be throw hard enough that he disappeared into the cloudy sky far, far away.

The Simurgh turned back towards the room and stared at Taylor. [Blasted Away. Speed increasing to 299 792 458 meters per second.]

“Oh, really?” she squeaked.

The Simurgh nodded solemnly. Behind her, Hatchet Face disappeared with a twinkle of starlight where a convenient hole in the cloud cover appeared.

{Unit-02 was advised by Unit-03 to not interfere to eliminate threat posed by Host-Shard_Neutraliser in order to allow Unit-03 to act as part of the ‘Acquire Friends’ Sub-Directive.}

[Annoyance. Previous Communication Counter to Objective]

“Um, well, thanks,” Taylor said.

Panacea, meanwhile, had backed up and was hugging Glory Girl close, her eyes as wide as they would go as she stared at the Endbringer floating outside. “You, you control her too?”

“Hrm?” Taylor asked. “Oh, no, I don’t. She just showed up today.” That didn’t seem to reassure the healer much. “But she’s been friendly so far. Maybe she can help your sister? I think she’s pretty good with mental things.” Panacea went very white at that.

Bonesaw was quicker in getting over her shock than Panacea. “Oh boy, Jack’s going to be really mad that I misplaced Hatchet Face.”

Taylor ignored the last remark. “Hey, could you help us, Miss Simurgh? I’m trying to get Bonesaw to fix Glory Girl and get Panacea to help Rune.” Panacea’s attention snapped back to her and she glared.

[Inquisitive. Host-Queen_Administrator willing to Accept Trade?]

“Um, depends on what you’re willing to trade.”

[Hopeful. Overwrite Primary Directive.]

Taylor nodded slowly. “I can do that. And in exchange for me helping you, you’ll help them help me?”

The Simurgh nodded, then turned to stare very hard at Bonesaw. [Warning. Host-Biological_Enhancer is a ‘Bad Girl.’]

“Um, why’s she looking at me like that?” Bonesaw asked.

Taylor shrugged. “She just said that you’re a bad girl. Don’t know why though. Did you do anything bad lately?”

Bonesaw’s hands trembled and she shook her head violently from side to side, her hair bobbing all over as she did. “N-no, I’m a good girl.”

“Well, you did hurt Glory Girl, and I guess you did that whole pathogen thing all over the hospital. That wasn’t very nice,” Taylor chidded.

Bonesaw moved her mouth like a fish out of water. She sniffed and when she next spoke she sounded rather watery. “I can fix it,” she muttered. “But Mister Slash will be angry with me.”

“If he made you do something bad, then you shouldn’t listen to him,” Taylor argued. “Hurting people is usually pretty bad, unless they did something to deserve it. You should apologize and try to make it better. That’s what I do when my friends hurt people by accident.”

Bonesaw nodded, her face mostly hidden by her hair, but Taylor could still see the way her lips quivered. Taking pity on the girl, Taylor walked up to her and slowly wrapped her in a hug. She wasn’t used to touching people much, but it felt like the right thing to do. “I can fix them,” Bonesaw mumbled into Taylor’s chest.

“Good! Now, how about you do that, and I’ll talk to Miss Panacea here for a bit, okay?”

The girl nodded. “It’s pretty easy. I made a counter-agent, I just need to disperse it through the hospital.” She pulled a vial from a pocket in her apron and gestured with it, the brownish liquid within sloshing around. “Um, when I’m done with that, would it be okay if we still had a picnic?”

“I don’t know,” Taylor said. “It might still rain tomorrow.”

[Informative. No rain.]

“Or maybe it won’t,” Taylor corrected. “Yeah, sure, why not. Tomorrow afternoon at the same park I met Mister Jack, but this time he’d better not try anything, okay?”

“Okay, thanks Miss Queen Administrator!” Bonesaw said, some of her good cheer returning. With an expert twirl, she aim the vial towards Glory Girl and Panacea and did something that had a mist shoot out of the vial and towards the heroine. “See you all later!”

Taylor watched her leave, then turned back to Panacea. “So, uh, about my friend?” she asked, a hand pressed against the back of her head.

***

Twenty minutes later, a very confused Amy Dallon sat on the bed her sister was sleeping on. She supposed that now was a good time to panic, or maybe it was too late for that?

The girl, Queen Administrator had gone as soon as Amy had healed her friend. It didn’t even take much to convince her to leave Rune in one of the nearby rooms to recuperate in peace. It probably helped that the ex-Empire cape really did need some sleep and a few heavy meals.

Amy reached out, fingers intertwining with her sister’s. Vicky was safe, she was better now, the little things messing with her mind had dissolved into a harmless slurry of proteins and nutrients. The same had happened to everyone else she’d seen so far, though most of them had had less contact with the pathogen than Vicky.

Everything was safe, everything was better.

She could almost believe it.

She didn’t know how the PRT would react once she told them everything that had happened. The Slaughterhouse Nine showing up to recruit her, Bonesaw calling her a sister, Queen Administrator being so friendly with someone wanted dead by most of the country... the Simurgh showing up, apparently not controlled by Queen Administrator.

They were going to be asked a lot of questions. Leaning back, Amy let her head thump onto the pillow next to Vicky. One question remained for her to ask herself, though. Was she going to show up at the picnic she’d been invited to or not?

***


	12. Chapter 12

The Great Picnic Panic - Part One

May 30th, 2011 was one of the turning points in human history, through few people knew it at the time. The event that was later called the Great Picnic Panic started quite simply when a then new heroine, Queen Administrator, decided to host a picnic only a day after the Slaughterhouse Nine, infamous parahuman criminals, attacked Brockton Bay. The group’s goal was, ostensibly, to recruit that very same heroine.

Things truly started going wrong around noon, though the inception of these historical events can be traced back to earlier in the day.

-Excerpt from: Parahumans; how the Super Changed History

***

May 30th, 2011.  
Morning of the Great Picnic Panic

Taylor’s yawn was wide enough that it had her jaw aching and her spine tingling. She had woken up to the sun shining through her window and the birds singing outside. After stretching and rolling out of bed, she stood up and started looking for clean clothes, only to pause when her attention drifted to the window.

There was a face there, a very large--but not fat--face that was entirely white as though carved out of marble. “Unit Three?” she said, squinting at the figure.

[Amused. Affirmative.]

“So, you’re still around?” she said as she walked away from the window and started looking for pants.

[Affirmative. Agreement incomplete.]

“Agreement... oh, our trade from last night. Yeah, okay. You did carry out your end. So, is your primary directive the same as Unit Twos was?” The jeans she found were a little ratty, but it was either that or nothing.

[Annoyance. Affirmative.]

She pulled on a simple t-shirt. It wasn’t worth finding something nicer since it’d be hidden by her costume anyway. “Cool, so, same rules apply. Don’t hurt me, and try to stop others from hurting me. Listen to what I say, unless doing that would end up hurting me, and try to keep yourself safe.”

[Joy. New Primary, Secondary and Tertiary Directives Accepted! Previous Primary Directive Overwritten.]

Taylor smiled as she made her way downstairs and started looking for her sneakers. She’d made another friend! With Cass yesterday, and Leviathan before that, she now had three whole friends. This was the best week ever.

She stepped outside into a sunny Monday morning. School was starting up today, but she figured that she could make an exception, what with Unit Three joining her for the first time. Yup, that was as good a reason as any to avoid school.

The Simurgh was nowhere to be seen, but Taylor didn’t mind that so much. Instead she walked towards the gas station where Leviathan was hiding and stepped into the alley. “Heya big guy! How are you?”

{Unit-02 is combat ready.} Leviathan said. He moved out of the deeper shadows of the alley and stood a little closer. Was it her imagination or was he standing taller?

“Good to hear! So, we’ve got a few things that need doing today,” she said as she reached the box that hid her costume. With practiced motions she slid on her tassled robes and slid on a domino mask under her hood.

{Priorities?}

“Well, first we need to find a civilian identity for Unit Three. Then we need to find her some clothes, because she’s naked and that’s just inappropriate. Oh, and this afternoon we have that picnic to make up for yesterday’s mess. Maybe we could invite a few more people over? And we need to go see Cass at the hospital too. Probably do that before the picnic.”

A shadow fell across the alleyway as The Simurgh lowered herself down to stand by Leviathan. This close together it really highlighted how much smaller Unit Three was than Leviathan. She wasn’t small. No fifteen-foot tall woman covered in wings could be called small, but she wasn’t half as tall as Unit Two.

[Indignant. No clothing. Feathers.]

Taylor shook her head. “You can’t just use feathers. You need to wear something.”

[Discrepancy. Unit-02 Clothingless.] The Simurgh pointed out.

{Negative. Unit-02 has acquired clothing.} He bowed his head a little, displaying the top hat that sat on his head at a jaunty angle. {Acquired ‘Fancy Top Hat’ as part of Disguise Protocols instated by Host-Queen_Administrator.}

“Right, plus you look like a girl. You can’t just go around topless.”

[Indignant. Unit-03 is ‘perky.’] The Simurgh crossed her arms under her chest and puffed her chest and wings out.

Taylor stared, then looked down at her own assets. “B-be that as it may,” she said past a furious blush. “You still need to wear something. Plus it’ll be fun.”

Unit Three seemed to think on that for a moment, then she nodded. [Accepting. Will Acquire clothes.]

Taylor beamed up at her new friend. “Cool! If you really don’t like it after trying some, then I guess it wouldn’t matter too much. It would just make things way less awkward if you were, uh, not naked.”

With a deep breath to recentre herself, Taylor looked out of the alley and towards the rest of her city. She paused three steps later. “Uh, You don’t happen to know anything about fashion, do you?”

***

Sabah’s life had taken a turn for the surreal the day Queen Administrator had visited her. First, the PRT had spent hours drilling her over her admittedly long conversations with the young parahuman. They had only really stopped when she started refusing to answer their questions. It was rather obvious that they didn’t know what to do about the teen who controlled Leviathan and she could sympathise. That sympathy lasted until they started weedling her for details about Queen Administrator’s appearance under the costume.

The week that followed was one of the strangest in her career as a designer and tailor. First came those curious about the place where The Queen Administrator had bought her now infamous costume, then the investors started poking around.

It helped, she realised, that Queen Administrator was often found on PHO wasting time and answering inane questions. One of the most common questions asked to a new cape was about their costume, and Queen Administrator was liberal in her praise of Parian and her little shop near the Boardwalk.

So, like any halfway decent businessperson, Sabah jumped on the opportunity. She went online and auctioned off the rest of her stock. In no time at all she had more money than she knew what to do with and a list of orders longer than she was tall. Things were finally looking up.

Sabah smiled as she moved another bolt of cloth over to a sewing machine while another length of cloth flew across her workshop, unfolding all the while two wrap around an evening dress she was creating.

She had hired a young woman to help her keep an eye on the shop floor. It helped that hers was one of the only stores to reopen so soon. That was going to change though, the Great Brockton Bay Tsunami had scared some people off, but it couldn’t be denied that the entire city was quite a bit cleaner.

Things were still uncertain at home. Folks didn’t know what to do now that the bigger gangs were mostly gone. There was hope that things would only get better from there, but then there was the Queen Administrator with her pet Endbringer. How many wanted to stake their future on the back of a single, somewhat unstable teenager?

She sighed as she added the finishing touches to the dress. A pretty black thing with an open back, ordered by someone on PHO. The measurements were obviously too big for a normal person, but she wasn't going to ask questions. The client’s money was real enough, so she couldn't complain.

Just as she was about to box the dress, her new employee slipped into the workshop. “Um, Miss Parian. Sorry to bother you, but, uh, Leviathan.” The girl swallowed. She was holding onto a couple of hats that were supposed to be on display out front, a fedora and a bowler hat. “I mean, Leviathan’s standing out front.”

Parian nodded once, then walked towards the front door. She tried to glide, to walk in such a way that her dress hid the way her legs wobbled. She paused as she entered the shop front. She could see the scaly grey skin of Leviathan standing just outside her shop through the front windows. More concerning was the girl standing in the middle of the shop while twirling from side to side to let the tassels of her costume wrap around her legs.

“Hello, Queen Administrator.”

The young cape’s attention snapped around to Sabah and she grinned wide. “Parian!”

“How are you doing?” she replied, falling back to old courtesies while her mind rushed. The Endbringer-controlling cape didn’t seem to be in a bad mood. And she seemed to like her costume, she’d even said as much online. Did she want something new? She could do that.

“I’m alright. Very busy, but things are pretty good. I’m extra happy that your shop’s open. Especially since most other stores are closed today because of those Slaughterhouse people.”

Parian swallowed hard. “Yes, I heard they were in town. I, I could have stayed at home, but honestly, if they come for me it’s better that I be here where I’m never really unarmed and closer to the Protectorate.”

Queen Administrator nodded. “Yeah, I hear ya. That Jack guy talked to me yesterday.” Parian’s heart skipped a beat at that. “He was kinda nice, but kinda rude, you know? Then that naked one, the Siberian attacked me. Oh, and the one with all the glass, Shatterbird. Also, Squealer and Skidmark.”

“But you’re okay?” she asked.

“Oh? Yeah, I’m fine. They’re, uh, sorta all dead though... but it’s not my fault!” she added hastily while moving her arms as if to deny it all. “Skidmark and Squealer attacked me first, and Unit Two just defended me. The other two were taken out by the Simurgh. Speaking of, could you help me find her some clothes?”

The Simurgh lowered herself down in front of her shop and waved.

Parian fainted.

***

Taylor leaned over the fallen fashionista cape. She’d managed to move her closer to the counter at the back of the room and pushed her up so that she was sitting against it instead of just being flopped on the ground. Beyond that, though, Taylor was kind of stumped. “Parian? Hello? It’s okay, Parian, you can, uh, unfaint now.”

The cape groaned then flinched back from Taylor who immediately backed up. She stared around the shop, her doll-face looking everywhere before snapping back to Taylor. “Did I?”

“Yup.”

“Oh my. I’m sorry. I don’t suppose you could help me up?” she said.

Taylor smiled at her as she stood up straight and extended a hand to the doll cape. It wasn’t hard to lift her to her feet. “I’m sorry, I guess I went a bit too fast with all the revelations as stuff, huh?”

“A bit, yes,” Parian said and her little accent made that sound like the greatest of crimes. “Did you really just ask me to make a dress for the Simurgh?”

Taylor laughed awkwardly and dragged her attention away from the cape. “Heh, yeah?”

“I...” Parian looked as though she very much wanted to pinch her brow. “Queen Administrator, you have been a huge boon to my business. But that was you, a human, a scary one, but one that has, so far, been viewed in a rather positive light. Do you have any idea what would happen if the Simurgh was seen wearing one of my signature dresses?”

“Um, it would be bad?” Taylor guessed.

“Yes, yes it would.”

Taylor resisted the urge to pout. “Well, shucks, okay. Um, would it still be bad if I just asked you for advice, then?”

[Dismissive. Unnecessary.]

Taylor frowned and spun to look out the window. “What’d you mean, unnecessary? The advice?” Parian didn’t push or ask why she the Endbringer-controlling girl was talking to no one in particular. She rather liked living.

[Affirmative.]

She crossed her arms and walked a little closer to the window, the Simurgh just stared “So, you think you know better than Parian?” Taylor said to the window, confusing the cape behind her.

The Simurgh dropped from above and floated to a stop an inch off the ground. Her face turned Taylor’s way, ignoring Parian who scrambled back at the sight of her. [Smug.] With a gesture, the Endbringer did something and a girl screamed from within the workshop.

Taylor twisted around in time to see the door to Parian’s workspace open and something black flutter out. Then the door closed with a decisive ‘snip.’ When she turned back around it was to find the Simurgh now wearing a black cocktail dress made of a dozen layers of silky cloth layered over each other. An equally black fedora sat on her head, raked back to let the Endbringer see clearly.

“Um,” Parian said. “Did she just... steal one of my dresses?”

Taylor huffed. “Hey, you can’t do that!”

[Negative. Paid for.]

“What do you mean you paid for it?” Then Taylor looked at the cut of the dress and the way it fit her rather larger than average frame. “Did you order that?”

The Simurgh shook her head. Then her lips quirked up in a mischievous smile and she raised her wings around her as if to make herself larger. Sunlight reflected off her wings, casting her skin in a million rainbow hues. [Preen. Coincidence!]

Taylor shook her head. “Bullpoop,” she said. Then she noticed that both the Simurgh and Leviathan were looking right past her. Turning, Taylor found a tall-ish redhead talking with Parian in a low whisper. She looked familiar, but before she could take a good look the girl noticed that she was the focus of the Endbringer’s attention, ‘eeped’, and ran off back to the workshop.

“I’m really sorry, Parian. Uhm, how much was that dress?” Taylor cringed. Dresses that pretty were expensive, and she still owed Parian for her own costume. And Leviathan’s hat. And the Simurgh’s hat.

“It was a special order, from PHO. An account called The Winged One, paid for it in full just... this... morning,” Parian said while eyeing the winged Endbringer.

Taylor turned to stare really hard at her newest friend.

[Coincidence!]

***

Parian leaned back against her shop’s counter. Her costume felt ten times heavier, as if she couldn’t stand straight anymore. That had been, without any doubt, perhaps the second scariest thing that had ever happened to her.

She’d received the order for that dress before Leviathan attacked Brockton Bay. Before Queen Administrator supposedly triggered. And it fit the Simurgh perfectly.

Swallowing hard, Parian vowed that she was going to start drinking. Her new shop assistant stepped out of the back room. “Is she gone?” she whispered.

“She’s gone, you can come out now, Emma. There’s nothing to fear.”


	13. Chapter 13

The Great Picnic Panic - Part Two

May 30th, 2011.  
Morning of the Great Picnic Panic

“Okay, so first thing’s first,” Taylor said as she walked in front of her friends like one of those people in front of a walking band. She contemplated getting one of those twirly sticks, but she’d probably just fudge it up.

Behind her, the Simurgh floated along a few feet in the air, looking around her as though unused to being on ground level. Leviathan came in the rear of their little procession, making surprisingly little noise as he dipped under electrical wires and around streetlamps. “What we need,” Taylor continued. “Are things to set up a picnic. Last time was alright, but it was only two people... sorry Levi, I mean three people, but only two of them were eating. We’ll probably have quite a few important people coming over, and we’ll need to take care of them.”

{Affirmative.}

[Affirmative.]

“Yeah. This time we’ll have even more guests. So what do you guys think we’ll need to make this the awesomest picnic ever?”

{Unit-02 suggests large quantities of liquids.}

“O-kay,” Taylor said. “Uh, I think you meant something to drink, right? Yeah, we’ll need drinks. But not alcohol because most of us are too young for that. So, uh, yeah, drinks, that’s good.”

The Simurgh pressed a hand to her face. [Exasperation.]

“Well, if you know so much more about it what would you suggest?” Taylor asked. She waited at an intersection to cross, but the car that had moments ago seemed as if it was going to cut her off stopped, the driver within staring at her friends with wide eyes. She took that as a sign that she could go.

[Suggestion. Invite additional organic acquaintances. Invite inorganic acquaintance, ‘Dragon.’ Acquire edible foodstuffs.]

“Oh, Dragon! You’re right. And yeah, we need food. Uh, I don’t know if I have enough at home to feed everyone though.” Taylor kept walking. She felt like skipping actually, but there were so many people looking at her that it might have been a little embarrassing.

[Suggestion. Acquire foodstuffs via direct purchase.]

Taylor winced. “I, uh, don’t really have much money.

{Unit-02 suggests taking foodstuffs by force. Genocide protocols ready.}

“What? Just kill everyone in a supermarket and run? You know, they might trace that back to us,” she pointed out. There was a man walking nearby who jumped out of her way and almost fainted when what she said registered.

{Unit-02 capable of Terminating Organics while making it look like Natural Causes. Instant Dehydration is a Natural Cause of Termination Amongst Organics.}

“Hmm, no, better not. Thanks for the, uh, idea though,” she said. “We want people to be less afraid. Unless they’re our enemies, in which case more afraid would probably be better, I suppose.”

[Smug. Have Currency.]

“What?” Taylor stopped mid-step and turned to face the Simurgh. “Where? When did you get it? For that matter, where are you hiding it?”

[Correction. Currency not in vicinity. Targets of Termination yesterday subjects of Bounty. Suggestion. Collect Bounty Owned.]

Taylor cast her mind back to yesterday and the fights they’d sorta been in. The Simurgh had killed that Siberian person by making her pop. And she had sung Shatterbird to death. The Slaughterhouse Nine were rather infamous and she trusted the Simurgh when she said that they had bounties. She shrugged. “Sounds as good as any idea I had.”

***

Timothy was doing well. Oh, sure, that little kerfuffle last week had been... terrifying, but when it ended he had gotten a pat on the back from Legend--Legend!--and someone must have dropped a good word in somewhere because now he wasn’t an intern anymore but a full-time employee of the ENE branch of the PRT.

It felt really good to finally be moving up in the world. It was this indescribable feeling of accomplishment that made him want more.

That’s why he’d agreed to take a shift at the reception desk on Monday morning. It was the quietest time of the week, so it was perfect for him to gain a bit of experience on the job.

He was just zoning out, thinking of Jenifer the girl who was usually taking care of reception, when the doors at the far end of the lobby opened. He sat straighter, blinking back to full alertness when he recognized the cape stepping in.

Queen Administrator in all of her tasseled glory paused at the door. Timothy plastered an almost-genuine smile on and nodded at the girl. He didn’t like her, per-se, but she hadn’t caused too much trouble beyond that fiasco with the tsunami the other day and she’d been playing nice ever since.

That, and there were about a half dozen Troopers stationed all over the room.

He was also introduced to the Button. Turrets and other nasty traps were hidden in the ceiling and walls. He could summon with a press of the Button.

So, her pet Endbringer was probably waiting outside while its master came in for something. He’d help her along, be as polite and as nice as possible, and soon enough he’d get a nice raise out of it. And if she did something weird or dangerous, he’d press the Button.

The floor to ceiling window next to the doors began to vibrate, the screws all around it spinning so fast that they smoked before the entire window popped out of the wall with a little ‘plok’ sound and floated off to one side. The Simurgh flew in, wearing a dress and a fedora.

He pressed the Button.

Nothing happened.

“Oh, hey, you’re the same reception person as last time! Well, I guess you do work here and all,” Queen Administrator said as she flounced over.

He didn’t even know girls could actually flounce outside of novels. But here she was, smile visible in the shadows cast by her hood. The Simurgh floated up and behind her, taking advantage of the high ceiling in the lobby area. The Endbringer smiled.

One of the troopers fainted.

Timothy wanted to faint too. “How, how can I help you,” he squeaked.

“Oh, right. Um, I’m here to collect a bounty. Well, actually, she’s the one who’s here to collect, but you guys can’t hear her speaking in the back of your heads like I can and I don’t think she can sing her request to you without the whole explodey brain thing, so yeah, I’m here to collect a bounty on behalf of the Simurgh.” Queen Administrator’s smile was a little sheepish, as if she knew that she had rambled a bit and was kind of embarrassed about it.

It was almost cute. Like a little girl that was trying to act like an adult. The Simurgh’s smile grew into a smirk and any thought of that sort died a horrible death. ‘O-okay!” he said.

There was a protocol for this sort of thing, he knew. A few clicks later while Queen Administrator bounced on the balls of her feet, and he found it. It was pretty simple. Make sure the claim was verified, then make the cape wait as long as possible, try to subtly encourage them to join up, then, if that failed, ask for banking information so that the money could be transferred over within the next thirty business days.

“Wh-which bounties, exactly?” he asked Queen Administrator. Maybe he's just focused on her he could pretend that the Simurgh wasn’t right there. He really, really hoped that one of the troopers had called this one in.

“Uh, right. Silly me, I forgot that bit.” She laughed and he joined in though for the life of him he didn’t know why. “The Siberian and Shatterbird. Oh, and Hatchet Face. And Skidmark and Squealer if they had bounties.”

Timothy parsed that for a few seconds. “F-from the Slaughterhouse Nine?” he asked.

He had the impression that under the hood, Queen Administrator had just blinked. “Are there any other capes with the same name?”

“N-no, no, uh, let me just... yeah.” He bent back over his console and brought up the relevant files. It was his turn to blink. That was a lot of zeroes. In fact, all the Slaughterhouse bounties were pretty hefty. None of them had been confirmed dead but, well, he wasn’t going to argue that Queen Administrator didn’t have the firepower to pull it off.

“Um, no bounty on Skidmark and Squealer, I’m afraid. Um, that means that killing them was, uh, illegal.” With a quick bit of reading he discovered, much to his dismay, that he now had to inform Queen Administrator that she could, technically, be placed under arrest once she collected the bounty and left the vicinity of the headquarters.

Queen Administrator stiffened at that. “I didn’t do it,” she said way too quickly for anyone to believe her.

He decided not to argue when the Simurgh nodded behind her. “I-I yes. Okay. Um.” He looked at the instructions. The next part of the protocol was basically to stall until a recruiter came down to talk to the cape. He decided to skip that bit. “Do you have your banking information with you?”

“Oh, cheese and crackers. I didn’t think of that.” She looked up and over her shoulder at the Simurgh. “Do you have one?” The Simurgh didn’t move in any noticeable way, but that seemed enough for Queen Administrator who turned back around. “She doesn’t. Can we take it in cash?”

There were no protocols for that. Also, the sum he was looking at was in the millions and he doubted there was that much laying around. “Um.”

“Okay, so, how about you just give me what you have on hand, and we’ll come back later for the rest? Like, in a few days or something? It’s mostly to buy sandwiches and stuff for a picnic.”

Timothy closed his eyes and took a deep, calming breath through his mouth and out his nose. “I’ve got a few twenties on me,” he finally said.

***


	14. Chapter 14

The Great Picnic Panic - Part Three

May 30th, 2011.  
Morning of the Great Picnic Panic

Taylor skipped along. She had a pocket full of cash, the sun was bright, her two best friends were right next to her. Life was looking up for Taylor Hebert.

All the nice troopers had chipped in once she turned and asked them to help and the Simurgh went around the room collecting the money for her. She’d have to go back later and see if there was anything left to the bounty after they subtracted the three hundred or so they’d given her.

For now though, she was heading to the hospital to check up on Rune and maybe Panacea. Then she could pop on over to the supermarket before setting things up for the picnic. It was going to be awesome.

She paused as she arrived at the next intersection and huffed. The hospital was practically all the way across the city. “Hey, Unit Two, can I ride on your shoulder again? I’ve got to text Dragon and I don’t want to text and walk.”

{Affirmative.} Leviathan shifted until he was low enough for her to hop up onto his shoulder.

[Jealous. Can also carry Host-Queen_Administrator.]

Taylor blinked. “Well, yeah, but it would probably be a princess carry, and that’s a bit much, no? Also, you’re wearing a skirt, you shouldn’t be flying too high.”

[Indignant. Can fly.] The Simurgh tilted her head up, nose in the air.

She frowned and tilted her head to the side. “Aren’t you afraid some pervert will, you know, take an inappropriate picture or something?”

[Clever. Can Predict movement of Organics. Manipulate Mental Faculties to Avoid Images.]

“I guess that’ll do it,” Taylor conceded easily as they started moving. She slipped her phone out of her pocket and opened her text-app thingie to see that she had over a hundred messages from Dragon. “She must be so worried.”

>>Queen_Administrator: Oh my goshness, Dragon! I’m so, so, so sorry! I should have replied earlier.

>>Dragon: Taylor, are you well?

>>Queen_Administrator: Oh, I’m just fine. I’m going to go visit some friends at the hospital right now, then I’ll be preparing for another picnic this afternoon.

>>Dragon: Are you sure that’s wise? The Slaughterhouse Nine might interrupt again.

>>Queen_Administrator: Well, it’s not really interrupting if you’re invited, is it? Speaking of! Did you want to come this time?

>>Dragon: Yes. Yes, I want to go to your picnic. 

>>Queen_Administrator: That’s brilliant! What kind of sandwich do you want me to make for you?

>>Dragon: I’ll have to be in my suit, I’m afraid. As for sandwiches, I prefer byte-sized ones.

>>Queen_Administrator: Great! I’ll see you this afternoon! 

>>Dragon: Please try to stay safe.

With a contented smile on her lips, Taylor slipped her phone back in place just as they arrived at the hospital. It was a lot busier than the day before. Probably because they weren’t all breathing in weird tinkertech pathogen thingies.

Hopping down from Leviathan, Taylor expected to be picked up by a watery-whip, but instead her fall was slowed down by a faint pressure across her entire body. She giggled at the sensation and grinned at the Simurgh when she finally landed. “Thanks. So, I’ll be in there for a little bit. Um, I don’t want you two to be bored, not that following me around isn’t boring.”

{Unit-02 is Constantly Vigilant. Unit-02’s Entertainment is a non-factor.}

[Pleased. Not bored.]

“Aww, thanks guys. Anyway, you two can have fun doing whatever. I’ll just be inside for a bit. Don’t do anything I’d tell you not to do!” she called over her shoulder as she walked into the hospital.

The waiting room was quite filled. Plenty of people had gotten cut the day before and some of the worse cases had yet to be treated.

She was rather thankful that she already knew where to go, because there was a huge lineup at the reception desk. Dozens of people stopped to stare at her as she waited by the elevators for a few long seconds before slipping in and pressing the button for the seventh floor.

When the doors dinged open she was quick to hop out and make her way over to where she’d last seen Panacea and Cass. The healer wasn’t around, but sure enough, she found Cass twisting and turning in a bed right next to the room they’d been in yesterday. A room that was cordoned off with PRT tape.

“Hello!” Taylor said as she barged into the girl’s room.

Cass jumped in fright, then turned an evil glare towards Taylor before seeing who it was. “Oh, it’s you,” she said.

“Yup!”

“Didn’t think you’d show up after the massive fuck up yesterday. What’re you here for anyway?”

“Don’t swear so much, it’s rude. Also, you’re my friend, of course I’d visit you. Though, uh, I kinda forgot to bring flowers or a card, sorry?”

She snorted and scooted backwards up the bed. “No need for that. I’m all healed up thanks to Panacea. Thanks for bringing me over, by the way. Jack did a hell of a number on me. I was afraid I’d lose a boob at some point,” she said while tracing over the spot she’d been cut.

“Uh.”

“So, I have to ask. Did you leave me here on purpose after I got healed up, or was it just... you know, you being you?”

“I don’t understand,” Taylor said.

Cass grinned. “So it was you being you, then. Yeah. PRT folks asked me lots of questions after they cleared the building. They probably bugged the room too, so don’t spout anything stupid, alright?”

“I’ll try not to,” Taylor replied. “How are you feeling?”

“Oh, I’ve never felt better. I’ve been healed before, but Panacea’s little tune ups are crazy good. I could run a marathon right now. They won’t let me go because they’re being bureaucratic assholes and they want my id and whatnot to charge me. I think the way you brought me in is making them cool down on that, though.”

“How come?” Taylor asked. She tilted her head to one side to take her friend in.

“Because you scare them shitless? Bonesaw had this place locked up tight you know. What with her sickness shit in the air and all that. Then you waltz and and twenty minutes later everything is right as rain? I mean, don’t get me wrong, you did good, but that still scares ‘em.”

“Oh, okay. So, I’m having another picnic later. Wanna come?”

Cass started laughing, then she saw the look on Taylor’s face and laughed harder. “Oh, man, you’re nuts. But fuck it, if you can get me out of this place, I’ll go with you. Someone sane needs to keep you from doing something really stupid.”

The door creaked as someone pushed their way into the room. “You were told to rest for a reason, you know.” Panacea stepped into the room and, after staring at Cass for a bit, turned towards Taylor. “Hello Queen Administrator,” she said with an odd note of... respect, fear, something that Taylor couldn’t make out in her voice.

“Panacea!” Taylor said before she ran the short way towards the healer and wrapped her arms around the startled girl. “Thank you so much for healing Cass. I really, really appreciate it. I, uh, guess I owe you one.”

“Hey, hands off the merchandise,” Another voice said from just outside in the corridor. Glory Girl gave Taylor an almost timid wave. “Speaking of, I think I still owe you a lunch, right?”

Taylor nodded after backing away from Panacea. The healer moved her arms up then down, as if uncertain what to do with them. “Yeah, I kinda forgot about that, what with the PRT people being all angry at me for telling Unit Two to clean the city.”

Glory Girl laughed but it sounded a little forced. “So, uh, can I come in, or will my aura be a problem again?”

[Self-Congratulatory. Unit-03 Counteracting Host-Aura_Projector Mental Influence.]

“Oh, that’s nifty,” Taylor said as she stopped focusing off into the open air. “The Simurgh just told me that she’s counteracting your aura thingie. So it’s all good.”

Glory Girl froze. “The Simurgh’s doing what?” she squeaked.

“Stopping your aura thingie,” Taylor said. “I think it’s part of the directive to keep me safe. Kind of like how Unit-Two stopped Skidmark and Squealer yesterday when they tried to hurt me.”

“And, and what happened to Skidmark and Squealer?” Glory Girl said. Her confidence seemed to have left the building along with most of the colour on her face.

“Squealer was squished with these water tentacle things,” Taylor said matter-of-factly. “And I think Unit Two just took all the water out of Skidmark all at once.” To help her maybe-future-friends understand, Taylor made helpful explody gestures.

Panacea placed a hand on Glory Girl’s shoulder in a show of solidarity.

“Dammit, Ta-- Queenie, you’re scaring them,” Cass said from her place on the bed. She’d moved around so that she was sitting on the edge of if while Taylor was talking. “Where’re your two other buddies anyway?”

“I don’t know,” Taylor said.

Panacea let out a long, long breath, and with the patience of a nurse dealing with a very inebriated patient, she tried to ask pertinent questions. “What, exactly do you mean when you say ‘I don’t know.’”

“I told them to have fun while I was in here. Don’t worry, I doubt they could get into too much trouble in like, less than twenty minutes.”

The Dallon sisters contemplated how much trouble two Endbringers could cause in twenty minutes. “So, when’s that picnic of yours?” Glory Girl asked. She had developed a keen ability to pretend that some things just didn’t exist, an ability that started when she first walked into her parent’s room while they were having alone time and that had only grown since.

“This afternoon! It’s going to be great. Dragon’s coming, and I’ll be there, of course. And Cass too! Bonesaw might come.” Taylor shifted her weight from one foot to the other, then focused down on her shoes. “I, uh, know that I invited you two yesterday. I don’t know if your sister told you, Glory Girl, what with the way you were hurt and all... um, the invitation still on the table, if you want.”

Panacea pinched the bridge of her nose. “This is such a horrible idea,” she said.

“We’ll go,” Glory Girl said. Her sister whipped her head around to stare. “Think about it, Amy, Bonesaw’s going to be there. You’re one of the only ones able to stop her if she does something... bad.”

Amy’s shoulders slumped as if someone had just dropped a heavy weight on her shoulder. “Dammit, you’re probably right.”

“Heh, that’s pretty much the reason I’m going too. Not the Bonesaw thing, but to keep an eye on Queenie here and make sure she doesn’t do something the East Coast will regret.” Cass was stretching where she stood next to the bed, an eye on Taylor the entire time.

“I’m not that bad,” Taylor pouted.

There was silence in the room.

“So, where do you want to meet?” Glory Girl asked to break the silence. “And do we need to bring anything?”

“You know the park that’s sorta near Immaculata?” Taylor asked and when both Dallon girls nodded she went on. “It’s there. And if you want to bring something, um, I’m taking care of drinks and food, so anything else would be nice. I could use some blankets and maybe plastic cutlery?”

Victoria gave her a thumbs up. “Can do.”

Taylor nodded. “Cool. So, Cass, you ready to go? Um, not that you have to come with me or anything.”

“You can’t believe how ready I am to get out of here,” Cass returned. “Where’re we going, anyway?”

“Oh, the supermarket first. Then the park to set up for the picnic. Unless you’ve got somewhere to be?”

Cass shrugged then started looking around the room. She found her clothes in a plastic bag off to one side. Just her shoes and some of the things she’d had in her pockets. The rest had been rather bloody. “Ah, shit. I’ve got no proper clothes. And, uh, no place to stay tonight either.”

“You can stay at my place,” Taylor announced with some finality. “Um, I don’t know if my clothes will fit you, though.”

“How about,” Glory Girl began. “You two head on to the lobby and I’ll fetch you some of my clothes. There’s a gift shop next to the cafeteria too, I’m pretty sure they sell t-shirts and stuff.”

“Cool, I appreciate it, Barbie,” Cass said.

Glory Girl’s smile when she excused herself to fetch Cass some clothes was rather sharp, Taylor noticed. Panacea watched her sister leave, then turned back to the others in the room. “That’s my cue to leave. I’ll make sure Vicky gets you something appropriate. And, I guess I’ll see you both later,” she said.

“Yup. See you soon, Panacea!” Taylor said. Once the healer had left, she turned to Cass. “We should get going.”

***

I really wish I had some clever line at the very end of this chapter. If I timed things correctly, the next chapter will come out on Friday, and the big event itself will be posted on Monday afternoon.


	15. Chapter 15

The Great Picnic Panic - Part Four

May 30th, 2011.  
Morning of the Great Picnic Panic

Cass was still grumbling ten minutes later. Taylor didn’t get it. The two of them were walking towards the supermarket nearest the place she’d picked out for the picnic. They weren’t getting that many looks. In fact, other than those that stared at Leviathan, almost everyone was fixated on Simurgh. The third Endbringer was spinning in circles way above them and apparently having the time of her life.

Taylor sighed. “Are you really that angry?” she asked.

Cass gave her a look, then pointed down at the shirt she was wearing which had a cartoon Amy Dallon smiling on it. It clashed a little with her off-white nurse pants. “This,” She tugged at the shirt. “This is embarrassing. Glory Hole did it on purpose.”

Taylor tried to suppress her smile but it still quirked her lips up at the corners, and Cass’s glare only grew. “But it looks so good on you,” she finally said, unable to hold back the mirth that filled her voice.

“Jerk. The shirt’s not so bad, it’s the panties that bother me,” Cass said.

“The... panties,” Taylor said.

“Panpan Panties; they keep the blood inside.” Cass’s voice turned into the kind of sing-song you’d expect from a late night infomercial before her face twisted into something vile. Taylor couldn’t hide the wince. The more cape merchandise she saw, the more she could understand the appeal of villainy.

“We’ll find you something nice to wear.” Taylor snorted. “Maybe Glory Girl boyshorts?”

Cass shoved Taylor who ran a few steps to keep her balance. She giggled the entire time and Cass joined in with her own laughter.

{Unit-02 enact Primary Directive Against Host-Telekinetic_Displacer?}

Taylor shook her head and started walking backwards to be able to face Leviathan. “No, no, she was just being friendly is all.”

[Updating Friendship Protocols!]

“Damn it’s weird when you talk to them like that. I mean, you hear shit about Endbringers being clever and stuff, but you wouldn’t think they understand English or whatever.”

Shrugging at Cass who gave her a look, Taylor turned to see that they were almost at the supermarket. “Cass, you wanna stay out here with the two of them, make sure they don’t do anything too silly?”

“You want me to babysit two Endbringers?”

“Just for a few minutes. They’re mostly well-behaved.”

Cass blinked. “Fuck it, why not?”

Grinning, Taylor looked up to the sky where the Simurgh was doing cartwheels in slow motion a hundred feet off the ground. “Alright you two, listen to Cass for a bit, okay? Oh, and no killing anyone. I’ll be right back. Oh, and Cass.”

“Yeah?”

“If Unit Two starts asking about genocide protocols just say no, alright?” With that said, Taylor walked into the supermarket, glad to see that the store was mostly restocked now that things were calming down in the city.

Cass just stared after the most powerful girl in the world as she walked into the grocery store, then up at the two Endbringers who were keeping an eye on her. She suddenly felt really small. “So, this is what it’s like to be stupidly powerful, huh?” The Simurgh shrugged. “Shit, no wonder she’s lost her marbles.”

***

Taylor had a list. Well, not an actual list-list, but more of a mental one, of all the things needed for a good picnic. She figured that it might be best to just buy all the ingredients and let people make their own sandwiches on the spot. Of course, she’d buy stuff to drink too, and pastries and stuff like that.

Pushing a cart along while dressed in her costume was a little strange--it was such a mundane thing to do while looking like Queen Administrator instead of just Taylor Hebert. She was still pondering that while tossing three different kinds of bread in her basket, when she felt a presence next to her. Ignoring it for the moment, Taylor got on tippy-toes to try and grab some of the healthier jams that were on the topmost shelf.

“Need a hand?” She turned to see a bemused Legend in full regalia looking at her as she stretched out to grab a jar of jam. He reached out and plucked it for her, then gently placed it in her waiting hand. “I heard that you were preparing a picnic of sorts?”

Taylor grinned and placed the jar in her basket. “Yup! Loads more people than I thought are coming. It’s going to be tons of fun.”

Legend grinned right back and eyed her cart full of goodies. “I can see that. Looks like you’re getting ready to feed an army over here.”

Taylor blushed a little and shook her head. “I’m the host, sorta, so it’s my job to make sure everyone’s fed.” Turning back to the shelves she inspected all the different sorts of jam and butters for a moment. “What’s your favourite sort of jam?”

“Hrm, not a question I ask myself very often. Strawberry, I guess. I’m more partial to peanut butter,” he said.

Taylor nodded and grabbed a jar of peanut butter off the shelf and tossed it in with the rest of her groceries. “So, um, did you want to come?” she asked. Her gaze shifted away from the hero, focusing on nothing in particular while she waited for him to answer.

“I... suppose that I could clear my schedule, yes.”

“Really?” Taylor looked up to him, only now realising how tall he was.

“I did have a few... questions I wanted to ask you. Actually, it’s more like certain parties within the PRT and government wanted to ask but they figured that I was the best one to do the asking. It’ll give us a chance to talk, right?”

“Of course!” Taylor skipped over to the next aisle, searching for the dessert section.

“Don’t forget to get some fruits and veggies,” Legend said as he followed after her at a more sedate pace.

Taylor snorted. “You sound like my dad,” she complained.

“I am a new father, you know?” he shot back. “I need to get used to getting rascals to eat their veggies.”

Taylor found the desserts and, instead of really pondering what people would want, just started tossing the more colourful pastries into her cart. “You are? That’s so cool. I, uh, didn’t really get ‘daddy’ vibes from you, what with the face underwear and all. Though, actually, that might have been a hint--” She stopped when she heard Legend coughing on his own spit.

“B-be that as it may,” he said. “I am a... daddy now.” His cheeks were rather red and Taylor had to hold back a giggle. People were staring and at least one of them had their phone out. She wondered how he would react when the video inevitably found its way to PHO.

She scooped up a few more picnic essentials, then moved to the next aisle where she stopped in front of a rack filled with different kinds of tea. “Do you think Unit Two could boil water for us?” she asked idly.

“I don’t think so. He never showed the ability to change the temperature of water before,” Legend said.

{Unit-02 can change the temperature of Liquids up to and beyond Critical state.}

Taylor nodded. “He says he can.” With that she picked out a few different flavours and tossed them with the rest of the food. “I think that’s everything,” she said.

“One of these days we’re going to need to sit down and figure out what, exactly, your friends can do,” he said.

Taylor nodded easily and made her way to the counters at the front of the store. She started placing things on the conveyor while Legend walked past her and started bagging her groceries for her. The girl at the register spent more time staring at Legend than paying attention to the items she was swiping. Taylor paid up and picked up a few bags. She noticed that Legend was grabbing the heavier ones but he just smiled knowingly when she raised an eyebrow at him.

Stepping outside, Taylor found Cass sitting on the curb with a ball in hand. She cocked her arm back then flung the ball forwards. It arced into the air, then began to spin, duck, weave and otherwise move in ways that no ball should.

“Pull!” Cass barked.

Leviathan snapped his tail around like a whip and a glob of water the size of Taylor’s head shot out and smashed against the ball high above the parking lot.

“Damn, that’s seven-four for you,” Cass said.

“Cass, what’re you doing?” Taylor asked as she watched the glob of water flow across the ground back to Cass’s side where it unravelled to reveal the rubber ball the girl had thrown.

“Hrm? Playing fetch? Sorta?” She turned, then froze as she caught sight of an amused Legend holding a handful of grocery bags. “Uh, hi Legend.”

“Hello, Cass was it?”

Cass smiled and gave a little wave. “That’s me. I’m one of Ta-- Queenie’s friends.” She smiled, then wiped her hands on a pant leg and extended it to Legend, then she saw the bags he was still holding and let her arm drop. “Gotta say, Queenie, I’m meeting all sorts of interesting folk with you around, huh?”

“I aim to entertain,” Taylor shot back. “The park’s only a few blocks off. Wanna walk over, or ride on Leviathan... Or I guess you could both fly?”

[Joy! Can lift Host-Queen_Administrator.]

Cass shrugged. “Might as well walk. We’ve got time to kill before noon. Are you coming with, Legend?”

The Triumvirate cape shrugged one shoulder. “I was invited, I might as well show up early,” he said before giving the teen a brilliant smile.

“Alright then,” Cass said before she swooped in and tapped each of Taylor’s bags once, then did the same to Legend’s. A moment later and the bags were all floating around the group.

“That power looks a lot like Rune’s, from the Empire Eighty Eight,” Legend said as he watched the bags circling around.

Cass almost missed a step. “What are you on about, laserboy? Do I look like a nazi to you?”

He slowly looked away from the bags and inspected her thoughtfully. “I suppose not”

The Simurgh dipped out of the clouds and came rocketing down towards the group. At the very last moment she slowed her dive, just in time to come to a stop an inch from the ground.

Legend jumped backwards, both hands raised as if to fire at the Endbringer.

The two stared at each other while the wind shifted around them. The parking lot was deathly quiet for a few long seconds. “Simurgh, stop antagonizing Mister Legend,” Taylor said. “Mister Legend, please don’t laser my friend.”

Legend slowly lowered his hands and loosened his tense shoulders a little. The Simurgh nodded at him as if they’d reached an understanding of sorts and floated backwards to stop near Taylor’s side.

“Come on, there’s no reason we can’t all be friends!” Taylor said.

[Initiate Friendship Protocols?]

“Exactly!”

[Preparing for Orbital Bombardment.]

“What!” Taylor spun towards the Simurgh. “No, that’s not how friendship works!”

The Simurgh tilted her head to one side. [Contrite. No Friendship Cannons? Sadness. Wasted Preparation Time.]

Taylor buried her face in her hands while all the--mostly--normal humans around her took in her one-sided conversation with the Endbringer. “No, Simmy, no orbital friendship cannons. Where did you even learn about those?”

[Anime!]

“You watch cartoons?” Taylor asked as she started walking towards the park again.

[Not Cartoons. Anime.]

“What’s the difference?”

[Exasperation.]

Behind the little group, Legend felt as though he had made a very big mistake somewhere along the line.

***

Aww, Simmy built that Friendship Cannon for nothing. Golly-gee-gosh, if only there was a way for her to have predicted that her Orbital Cannon of Friendship would go unused.

Credit for that horrible PanPan Panties thing to some of the sick people commenting on this story. Your minds are like beautiful gardens filled with the nastiest weeds and I love it.

 

Next time on How to Train Your Endbringer!The whole gang reunites for a picnic and nothing goes wrong! Taylor develops a crush. The Simurgh plots her plots. Dragon cries. Things explode! Secrets are revealed. And, most shocking of all, Leviathan makes tea!


	16. Chapter 16

The Great Picnic Panic - Part Finale

May 30th, 2011.  
Afternoon of the Great Picnic Panic

Taylor was busy setting a blanket down atop the hill with Cass holding down one corner and Leviathan the other, when Dragon’s suit came down from above like a dragon-shaped comet. Bursts of fire and exhaust shot out of the suit as it bled off speed, then twisted in midair to come to a delicate landing on the edge of the hill.

It wasn’t the same suit Taylor had seen on the Rig, it was a lot smaller and more humanoid, though still rather draconic, with metallic scales and a pair of bat-like wings on its back.

Taylor stood up, dusted off her knees and then raced over to Dragon to tackle her with a squeal. “Dragon!”

“Ah, hello, Queen Administrator. It’s good to see you too,” the Canadian Tinker said. She tentatively wrapped the arms of her suit around the much smaller girl.

“Oh, man, you can give hugs now too!”

[Dejected. Can also hug.] The Simurgh’s many wings drooped and for a moment she looked like a kitten caught in the rain.

Dragon laughed, and if it sounded a little tinny, no one commented. “I can indeed. It’s good to see you again. So, do you need help with anything? Oh, and I brought snacks.” She patted the thigh of her suit which opened and revealed a rack filled with still-warm cookies. The panel slid back closed when Taylor reached for one. “Maybe for dessert.”

Taylor would have protested but a voice in her head stalled her. {Unit-02 detects incoming Hosts.} She looked around, then saw Glory Girl flying towards them from more or less the direction of the hospital, Panacea pressed close to her chest and a basket held awkwardly in her off hand.

The Dallon sisters landed right next to the blanket and Panacea climbed out of her sister’s arms with what looked like a bit of reluctance. “Hello everyone,” she said.

Glory Girl was a little more verbose with her greetings. “Heya Dragon, and... Legend? Damn, Queenie, you’ve got friends in high places. Heya, Cass, nice shirt,” she said with a smirk. “It’s good to see that my sister has fans.” Her grin grew to shit-eating proportions when Cass glared back.

Taylor just shook her head and walked over to the pair. “I’m glad you made it! Dragon just arrived too. We’ve got, maybe one or two more guests coming, but this is most of us.” She pointed at the basket. “Are those the plates and things?”

“Yup,” Victoria said as she passed the basket over. “We asked around and they pretty much ran around looting the staff rooms for us. The folks at the hospital really love my sis.”

Legend walked over and picked the basket up with a grin. “It’s good to see one of the best healers around being appreciated,” he said. “Hello, Victoria, Amy. It’s good to see you on such a casual occasion.”

Taylor yoinked the basket away from Legend and made her way over to the blanket where Cass was sitting, her arms crossed over her knees. She dropped the basket next to the bags full of food and then tapped Cass on the thigh with a shoe. “Scoot over, would you?”

Cass did as she asked and let Taylor flop down next to her. “So, your thing going down as planned?” she asked.

“Hrm,” Taylor said. “More or less. The plan’s mostly to make sure everyone has a good time. Speaking of, wanna help me prep the food? Most of it is easy stuff.”

“Can I help too?” Dragon said as she walked over. She paused on the edge of the blanket, then stepped on it carefully to see if her rather sharp boots were cutting into the fabric. “I’ve been told that I’m a decent cook.”

“Sure!” Taylor said.

In no time at all they had a bit of a workstation set up, where Taylor would pass the ingredients to Dragon who revealed that her suit had a toaster in it--or at least the vents to one of her engines could be quickly converted to one--and who was the fastest at spreading jam and butter around. Then Dragon would pass the sandwiches to Cass who had a half-dozen plates floating around her.

Soon enough Amy wandered over and sat on the edge of the blanket to watch them work. “This is surreal,” she finally said.

“What’s surreal?” Taylor asked.

She waved all around her. “All of this. There are two Endbringers just... sunbathing, I think, and you have three parahumans just making sandwiches and my sister’s over there talking about flying with Legend. It’s so weird.”

“Weird is what I do!” Taylor exclaimed. “Weird is different, and I know that I haven’t been a cape for a long time, but I really think the cape scene could use some shaking up.”

“Hi everyone!” a sweet voice called from just down the hill.

Everyone paused for a moment to look where Bonesaw was standing atop the head of a monstrosity, one arm waving at everyone like the leader of a parade. She slid down the monster’s side, then started to climb up the hill while bunching up her skirt.

“Bonesaw,” Legend said as he turned to face the Slaughterhouse Nine’s littlest Tinker. Whatever good humour he had fled as he started to float a few inches off the ground.

Bonesaw grinned back. “Legend! It’s nice to see you.” She curtsied. “Actually, I think it’s the first time we meet. Uncle Jack said that the last time he saw you, you were hanging around with Hero, or was he hanging off you?”

Taylor stood, though she did it slowly enough that only Amy and Cass looked her way. “Unit Two, I think it might be time to interfere before this party turns into a bloodbath.”

{Unit-02 understands. Beginning Intimidation Protocols.}

Bonesaw was about to say something else when the entire hill shook, throwing her to the ground on wobbly legs. When the smoke cleared it was to reveal Leviathan, standing tall in between the two capes as if he’d been there all along. It helped that no one had seen him move from where he’d been resting on the other side of the hill.

Four sea-green eyes stared first at Legend, then his long neck twisted so that the Endbringer could give an equally bland look at Bonesaw. “Now now, this is supposed to be a nice picnic,” Taylor said from her place next to Dragon. “As the host, I think it falls upon me to make sure that no fights break out, and I take my duty as host very seriously.” She clapped her hands once. “Dragon and Cass have just finished making us all lunch, why don’t we all take a seat and a plate?”

Bonesaw smiled sheepishly then stood up and brushed the dirt off her skirt. “Ah, right, I wanted to thank you, Queen Administrator, for inviting me! I was going to bring something, but Uncle Jack told me that I’d better not. Oh, and I hope you don’t mind that Crawler came along? See, Mister Crawler had something of a favour to ask you.”

Immediately all the heroes tensed up, but Taylor just blinked and looked around until she saw Crawler crawling out of the treeline. Then her cheeks went a little rosy as she took the man in. He looked like a black six-legged monster the size of a minivan with tentacles sliding out from his underside to run across his body. His entire form was covered in spines and scales. His mouth was huge, like the maw of a shark filled with crooked fangs covered in sickly acids. “Oh, you’re Mister Crawler?” Taylor asked.

“That’s my name, girl,” the man said, his voice sounded like gravel being shaken in a milk jug to Taylor. He climbed closer, all six legs digging into the side of the hill.

“Now, Ned, be nice, you’re going to ask her a favour after all,” Bonesaw admonished.

“Ned, that’s your name?” Taylor asked and her blush only deepened when Crawler made a sound that could charitably be called an agreement. “It’s a very handsome name.” She looked at her feet, suddenly feeling very much out of place.

Behind her, and just out of her hearing, Victoria leaned closer to her sister, eyes riveted on what was happening. “This is a hallucination, right?” she whispered.

Cass took one of Dragon’s sandwiches from a floating plate--cut into little triangles!--and took a bite. “Nope, really happening.”

“Hrm, right, I want to fight them!” Crawler said.

“Fight... them?” Taylor said as her suddenly slow brain processed that. “Oh, um, yeah, I guess that would be okay, since you’re asking.” She started to wring her hands together. “Um, but maybe I could ask a favour in exchange?”

Crawler looked at her very hard with most of his thirty-odd eyes. “Depends. What do you want?”

Taylor opened her mouth to speak, squeaked instead, then felt her ears and cheeks warm up. Swallowing hard and shoring up her resolve, she let everything out in one breath. “CouldImaybepetyou?” She said all in one word while her face went thermonuclear.

The Simurgh made a squealing sound very much unlike her infamous scream and clapped her hands--even Bonesaw joined in. [Joy! Shipping! OTP!]

Taylor turned to glare at the Simurgh. “D-don’t laugh! And what’s an Oh Tee Pee anyway?”

While Taylor continued to berate a far too bubbly Simurgh, the Dallon sisters and Cass shared a look. “So, Amy, I know you don’t do brains, but can you do, like, concussions?”

“I’m thinking about it,” the healer admitted.

“You... want to pet me?” If anything Crawler looked as if the request was giving him pause. “And then you’ll let me fight them?”

Taylor refocused on Crawler, then back down to her fingers which were interwoven over her chest. “I, yeah?”

“Um,” Crawler said. “How old are you?”

Taylor’s blush, which she had just gotten under control, returned full force. “You, you can’t ask that kind of thing to a girl, Ned!”

Behind her, the Simurgh splayed out all ten fingers, then she stretched out a wing and spread five feathers next to her hands.

“Uh, you know I’m forty, right?” Crawler said. “That’s... probably your dad’s age. Don’t you know the half plus seven rule?”

Taylor tried puppy-dog eyes. Crawler, who had spent the better part of five years throwing himself into the very worst Parahumanity had to offer, was unaffected. She sighed. She should have realised that no one would want her that way. Despondently, Taylor shrugged at Crawler. “That’s okay then. And, um, yeah, I guess you can spar with Unit Two for a bit after. But, before that.” Taylor stood a little taller, then turned to all her guests.

She met their eyes one at a time. Legend was paying close attention, though he seemed ready to jump in and help her at the drop of a hat. Amy and Vicky were genuinely curious, but wary too. Vicky looked ready to grab her sister and run. Cass had no more shits to give, and Dragon was unreadable in her suit. Bonesaw was busy pulling the tomatoes out of a ham sandwich.

“I’ve tried to hide something for a while, and it probably wasn't the best idea, but I didn’t want people to be afraid of me.” Taylor swallowed and licked her lips. “But now... now I think I might as well tell you all, since you’re pretty much all my friends.” She took a deep breath. “Unit Two... is actually Leviathan.”

They stared. She stared back.

Cass rubbed her forehead, then grabbed another sandwich. “We know, dumbass.”

“Oh,” Taylor said. “Well, okay then.” She noticed one of Cass’s sandwich plates floating by and took one off the top. “In that case, I guess you should all just, enjoy? Oh, and Mister Crawler, um, maybe you and Unit Two can play in the woods?”

{Prepare Single-Target Termination?}

“No, no, just spar with him. You remember what you did with Mister Lung? Basically that.”

{Affirmative.} Leviathan turned to stare at Crawler whose face twisted in what could charitably be called a grin. Then Crawler jumped towards Leviathan only to be smashed back into the woods by a swipe of the Endbringer’s tail. Leviathan jumped after the parahuman, arms extended to grapple with Crawler amongst the trees.

***

“Are you sure that’s a good idea,” Legend said as he walked up next to Queen Administrator. “Letting Unit Two--Leviathan, I mean--fight Crawler. It will only make him stronger.”

“Stronger, maybe, but probably not as strong as Unit Two. And you can keep calling him that, if you want, it is his real name, after all. Though I guess it’s not as catchy as Leviathan. Oh, and Simurgh’s real name is Unit Three, which I guess means the next Endbringer to show up will probably be Unit Four.”

Legend had many things he wanted to talk to the young parahuman about. Her image in the public eye, how consorting with villains, especially the Slaughterhouse Nine, might not be a good idea, about the responsibility of those with power. Most of those ideas stalled at the mention of a fourth Endbringer. “You... know about the next Endbringer?” he asked.

“Well, no, but I bet Simmy does,” Queen Administrator said.

He waited for her to ask, but she never did. “We, the Protectorate would be willing to pay a lot of that kind of information, you know. We would be willing to do a lot to help you.”

She shrugged. “I really don’t want many things. Like, maybe next year I’ll want to buy a car or something to learn how to drive, but I’m mostly okay. And what I really want is mostly this.” She gestured towards the picnic where Dragon seemed to be having an amiable conversation with Bonesaw while pushing a plateful of veggies on the girl. Beyond them, the Dallon sisters and the Cass girl were chatting in quick whispers, a conversation that ended in a round of giggling.

“I see,” he said, and he did for what it was worth.

Queen Administrator was a rather ordinary girl, once you looked past her ability to control Endbringers. She might have been a little strange, perhaps a bit antisocial, but her wants were fair. More than one person he knew would be using her powers as leverage to get rich, or to become politically powerful. Instead, Queen Administrator was organizing picnics.

He had no doubt that she would give away just about anything she owed to someone who needed it more. She was the opposite of materialistic. That wouldn’t reassure the voices in the government or PRT who wanted to control her though.

“Tell you what, Mister Legend,” she said. “How about I go visit you guys one of these days and we can have tea and talk about things like civilised people. Maybe, um, on Saturday?”

He smiled. “That would probably work just fine,” he said. In the back of his mind, he was wondering how he could prevent some of the more extreme members of the PRT from showing up.

“Cool! Hey, speaking of tea, do you want some?”

***

Taylor left Legend behind--he was more of a coffee person apparently, the heretic-- and rejoined the rest of the group on the blanket atop the hill. “Does anyone know which bag the tea is in?”

Dragon, who was still talking to a beaming Bonesaw, lifted her head a little, then pointed to one of the bags without cutting off the young biotinker sitting before her. Bonesaw was shifting restlessly on the ground as she spoke. “It turns out that the Passenger’s connection will actually stay active for a little bit, even after all their vitals are gone. If you’re really fast, and really careful, you can stitch them back together and they’ll still have their powers. It’s mostly the corona pollentia and gemma that are important, you can replace the rest, no problem. Heck, I’ve even mostly automated it! Actually, Mister Mannequin did that, I just helped.”

“Sorry to interrupt,” Taylor said as she stood up, three boxes of tea balanced against her side. “But do any of you guys want some tea before we start on dessert?”

Bonesaw looked at Taylor, her eyes brimming with unbridled joy and what might have been tears of happiness. “We’re having a tea party?” she squeaked, All thoughts of vivisecting brains leaving in a flash.

“Of course!” Taylor replied. “It wouldn’t be a proper picnic without tea.”

She stood up, then looked around. They had a bag filled with juices and a couple of six-packs of soda, but no water. “Uh. Hey, Leviathan!” she called down into the forest where even now trees were being torn apart to the sound of guttural laughter. “I need, like, a gallon of water. Clean water. And it has to be boiling.” She lifted the boxes of tea as if that would help explain things. “I’m making tea!”

{Unit-02 Accepting Task from Host-Queen_Administrator. Temporarily Shifting Computation Allocated from Genocide Protocols to Tea-Making Protocols.}

The was another explosion in the forest, but the half-dozen parahumans on the hill ignored it. Instead, most of them watched as water vapour condensed into a bubble a few feet next to Taylor, then started to shimmer and smoke as it boiled.

“That’s very cool,” Bonesaw said.

Taylor agreed. “So, is everyone okay with green tea? It’s not the greatest, I know, but it’s one of those ‘you can’t go wrong’ blends.” Seeing as no one disagreed, Taylor opened one of the boxes of tea and poured a bit onto the bubble where the leaves started to darken the water.

She found a few mugs in the basket that Amy and Vicky had brought and just scooped them through the tea bubble. “Here you go,” she said as she carefully handed Bonesaw the mug. It didn’t take long to get anyone who wanted some a bit of tea, so after taking a mug for herself, Taylor plopped herself on the ground next to Dragon and Bonesaw. “So, what’re we talking about?”

“Implanting powers by stealing them from people’s heads!” Bonesaw said.

Taylor blinked. “That sounds kinda cool, I guess. Um, I’m afraid I won’t be able to add to the conversation, I’m not much of a Tinker.”

“Aww, that’s okay, we can talk about other stuff. Jack says that when I start talking too much about Tinker stuff, I get excited, then I just have to try things. And then I get all dirty and we have to stop somewhere so that I can take a bath.” Her eyes widened. “Oh, you must be able to take the best baths with Leviathan warming the water and all.”

“You know, I hadn’t thought about that,” Taylor admitted. “In fact, I haven’t even asked the Simurgh what she can do. I mean, I’ve got an idea, but it’s not very precise.” A shadow fell across her, and she noticed a fringe of white feathers in the corners of her vision.

[Can do many things! Mind-control, Mind-reading, Mind-raping, Mind-flaying, Mind-torture, Mind-probing, Mind-editing, Mind-wiping, Mind-splicing. Can fly. Can use Macro and Micro Telekinesis. Aware of Multiple Sciences. Can Build Tinkertech. Can use Precognition. Can use Postcognition... Is pretty.]

“Well, that’s all useful, I guess,” Taylor said to the Endbringer floating above her. “But what do you do for fun?”

That gave the Simurgh some pause. [Uncertain. Watch Anime. Troll PHO.]

Taylor’s head snapped up at the last one. “You have a PHO account?”

Dragon twitched, then her dragon-shaped head bent forwards and into a waiting palm. “Oh no.”

[Many!]

Bonesaw gasped and started clapping her hands together in excitement. “We could trade usernames and chat. I, um, can probably stea-- find a phone somewhere and keep up with all of you.”

“That,” said Jack Slash said “Sounds like a wonderful idea!”

Everyone stopped again, and this time they stared at Jack Slash who stood on the edge of their group wearing a cardigan over khakis and sock-filled-sandals. “I’m terribly sorry for interrupting everyone’s good time, but I’m afraid that my associates and I are about to leave.”

“Aww, do we have to?” Bonesaw whined. “We didn’t even get to the desserts yet!”

Jack’s smile was radiant and he somehow managed to ignore the glares of nearly every person there. “I’m afraid so, Bonesaw.”

With a disappointed sigh, the girl got to her feet, then waved at Taylor. “Thanks for the invitation, it was really a lot of fun,” she said.

Bonesaw was leaving the little group atop the hill when Taylor stood up. “Mister Jack, could we talk?” she asked.

The leader of the Slaughterhouse Nine looked at her, amusement writ large in his eyes. “Of course. Are you considering joining my merry band of misfits?”

“I’m afraid not,” Taylor said easily. “Just a chat. Maybe down the hill a ways?”

Jack’s smile was resplendent. “Of course, lead the way.” He bowed extravagantly, as if ushering her into a ballroom instead of down the side of a hill.

Taylor nodded and walked right by him, a smile on her lips the whole time. Dragon looked as if she wanted to follow, and Legend was moments away from jumping to his feet. She lead him towards the woods, nowhere near where Leviathan was fighting with Crawler, but close enough that they could feel their clash through the ground as it shivered beneath their feet.

She ran a foot over soft grass, wishing that she’d taken her shoes off at some point. Then, with a smile fixed on, she turned.

***

“Mister Jack,” Queen Administrator began, and as she spoke Jack Slash saw the mirth leaving her eyes like sand slipping through numb fingers. But her smile never changed. “You know, there are a lot of people that are really afraid of you.” She giggled, and something told him that she wasn’t laughing with him. “But I think they’re a little bit more afraid of me and my friends.”

He gave her his most charming smile. “We do tr--”

“Shush, Mister Jack, I was talking.” Queen Administrator tilted her head to one side, then gave him a once-over. “Your perspective really changes when you have a precog on your side. You start thinking more about what will be, rather than what is. Your little group have been doing a lot of bad things, Mister Jack. Now, who am I to tell you to stop? Still, it would be mighty nice if you stopped hurting good people and focused a little more on the... not so good people.”

It shouldn’t have been intimidating. She was a girl who barely reached his shoulders wearing a silly costume. Of all the heroes, villains and other parahumans he’d faced, she was, on her own, perhaps one of the least intimidating. The Simurgh was watching him from atop the hill and after a particularly strong impact, he saw Leviathan’s four eyes catching the light from within the forest.

Jack Slash swallowed despite himself but he was experienced enough to keep his composure. “And if we don’t want to do that, little miss?”

“Then, perhaps it’s time for your luck to turn, Mister Jack.” Queen Administrator smiled again, and this time it reached her eyes; there was a gleam of calculation in that smile, hidden behind mirth and madness.

She turned and started walking away, back towards what was left of the picnic. “Oh, and Mister Jack. If you ever step foot in my city again, I’ll kill you.”

***

Taylor tried to skip back to the top of the hill, she really did, but the incline was killing her calves after just two hops so she gave up on the idea. Instead, she walked over to Bonesaw and wrapped the girl in a tight hug. “See you around, right?”

“Right!” she said before looking into the woods were Jack and a somewhat bedraggled Crawler were waiting. She then looked towards the hill covered in heroic figures. There was longing in her eyes, but she still stepped back and away from Taylor. “Bye everyone!” she called and waved at the group. “Oh, and I really hope you all enjoy our big surprise!”

With that, the bio-tinker raced downhill with a squeal of delight and glomped onto Crawler who faded back into the woods with Jack by his side.

“Fuck me,” Cass muttered just loud enough that everyone could hear.

Legend started to ring before he pulled a phone out of his pocket. Dragon gasped and shot to her feet.

Then the explosions started.

***

So, I forgot to thank my awesome new beta readers last chapter and that’s unforgivable. A huge thank you to A.B.Christensen, js_za, Vhalidictes, and eschwartz! You really helped make this more better-er!

 

Tune in Next Time on How to Train Your Endbringer! 

Taylor and her heroic friends fight against the monster of the week. The Simurgh tests her newest toy. Leviathan goes Surfing. And Dragon swears!

Ps: Seeing that this is the end of a big ‘arc’ for this story, I want to thank everyone that likes and comments, it’s really encouraging to see so many people enjoy what was otherwise just a fever dream and something that was never meant to have more than one chapter. Without your continued interest and the many, many ideas I steal from the comments, this story would probably die an untimely death.

Thank you!


	17. Chapter 17

In Which Taylor Uses Orbital Friendship Tactics

A/N: Trying a slightly different writing style in this chapter.

***

Legend disappeared in a flash of light, a beam following his trail as he raced through the sky and towards the explosion.

Everyone else was a little slower to react. “Shit, Amy, c’mon!” Victoria said as she grabbed her sister and held her close. The healer nodded and wrapped an arm around her back to stay close. They took off after the Protectorate leader.

“What was that?” Cass asked as she turned to who she believed was the most informed person around.

Dragon looked away from the still roaring fires. “An alert came up about a break-in at the PRT lock-up facility. Someone, probably Mannequin, tampered with the security system and delayed the alarm. There are nearly half a dozen capes locked up right now, but they only broke into two cells. Lung’s and Fenja’s. I’m still trying to learn how much time they actually spent there, or what they did.”

“Shit,” Cass summed up the situation. “You think Lung’s joined the Nine?”

“Perhaps, but then, why single out Fenja as well?” Dragon turned to Cass. “Did she strike you as the type to join the Nine?”

“Fenja? Hell no. She was a pretentious bitch, but not a psycho.” Cass eyed Dragon. “So, we going to help?”

Taylor had recovered from the shock of the explosion. It had spooked her in a way that few things had in the last weeks. With a deep shaky breath she replied, “Yeah. We’d better get over there. Dragon, can you carry me?”

“I’m afraid not. The exhaust from this suit’s flight mechanism would be rather dangerous to anyone without a Brute rating.”

Taylor nodded slowly. She wanted to get closer to the centre of the action, but riding Leviathan might be too slow. She pretended to not notice just how close the Simurgh was to her side, or the look of glee on the Endbringer’s face. Taylor sighed. “Simmy?”

[Anticipation.]

“Do you think you could carry me?”

The last word was hardly out of her mouth when the Simurgh glomped Taylor off the top of the hill and had her ensconced within a cage of feathers pressed against the Endbringer’s chest. Taylor, who had not been expecting quite that enthusiastic a response, was caught floundering within the Simurgh’s grasp. “Okay, okay, I get it! I’m sorry for not letting you fly me sooner!”

With a mid-air pirouette, the Simurgh came to a stop high above the city, then opened her wings and let Taylor lean backwards a bit while the Endbringer kept her close with both arms wrapping her in a hug. Taylor’s eyes went wide as she stared down at the buildings of the Bay which all looked tiny from their height. She could see far out towards the ocean where the curvature of the planet appeared as a rough slash across the horizon. “Whoa.”

[Joy!]

Taylor laughed and spread her arms out. It was like she was the queen of the world. The little bit of vertigo she’d felt at first was replaced by adrenaline that coursed through her veins and made her feel like she could do anything.

Then she saw all the smoke pouring into the sky and stared at the blazing fire near downtown. If she squinted, she could just make out the PRT building, half of it crumbling down into a fiery pit while the rest was slowly being eaten up by the fires.

The buildings around were suffering too, and a bunch of people were running away from the area. Something roared from within the blaze, then beams of light flashed under the smoke. Legend was fighting something, something big.

The Simurgh dived, taking a screaming Taylor with her as she aimed for the top of the hill in the little park they had been in. They slowed down to a complete stop, the Simurgh holding Taylor back with a bit of telekinesis until they were hovering only feet off the ground. “Woo! That was great! Cass, you coming?” Taylor extended a hand at the girl.

Cass took in the way her friend was grinning from ear to ear, then the similar expression on the Endbringer behind her. “I think I’ll just do my rock floating thing,” she decided.

“Aww, that’s okay. Hey, Leviathan, come on, there’s a bunch of fire and stuff and we could probably use your help.”

{Affirmative.}

Dragon moved away from the group, then shot into the air with a blast from two turbines that poked out of her upper back. “I’ll go and coordinate efforts with the Protectorate and PRT. I’ll see you all very soon.”

Taylor watched the Tinker go. Cass joined them in the air a moment later and Leviathan was ready to go beneath them. “Okay Simmy, nice and steady. Oh, and can you use that precog thing to figure out where Jack’s going? And to make sure the fewest people get hurt?”

[Affirmative. Optimal Predicted Path indicates that Host-Queen_Administrator allow Unit Two of Twenty to enact Firefighting Protocols, followed by allowing Unit Three of Twenty full access to Friendship Protocols.]

Taylor nodded. “You hear that, Unit Two? Just try not to hurt anyone while playing with the fire!”

{Unit-02 confirms. Beginning Fire-Genocide Protocols.}

Their flight was fast enough, even with Cass slowing them down a bit, that they reached the edges of the battle in less than a minute. Below, Leviathan was rushing down the streets, every storm drain in his path bursting off as a torrent of water poured out and after him.

The Simurgh landed on one of the roofs where a few other capes were waiting. Dragon was there, of course, but so was Armsmaster, Miss Militia and Dauntless of the Protectorate. Amy and Victoria were standing nearer the edge of the roof, looking down at the fight below.

“Hey everyone!” Taylor said as she lightly stepped out of the Simurgh’s grasp and started to fall the half-dozen steps to the ground. The Simurgh grabbed her with a telekinetic hug and lowered her down until her feet touched the flat roof.

The Protectorate heroes stared at her and her friend for a long moment before Armsmaster spoke. “You here to fight?”

“Yup!” Taylor said. The Protectorate heroes tensed. Miss Militia was suddenly holding a very big gun and Armsmaster started to lower his halberd next to Dauntless’ famous Arclance.

Glory Girl flew around the Protectorate capes in a flash and placed herself between Taylor and the heroes. “She meant with us!” she said before anyone could do anything they would regret. “Right? You did mean with us?”

“Oh, yeah! Dragon said that the Nine did something to Lung?”

Armsmaster seemed reluctant to speak at first, but another explosion from below--though one much smaller than what had started the conflict--convinced him to speak. “The Slaughterhouse Nine somehow granted Fenja’s ability to grow to Lung,” he finally said. “And we suspect they dosed him with something to increase his aggressivity. He is not acting rationally. We were going to move in, but Legend told us to hold back for the moment.”

“Hrm, that sounds pretty bad,” Taylor said. She walked right by the heroes and to the edge of the roof where, from a dozen and a half stories up, she could see metallic scales moving under the smoke and fire, a huge beast that had to be three times Leviathan’s size and vaguely lizard-like in shape.

Lung’s head was twisting around, slitted eyes glowing with anger as he tried to track Legend who was flying circles around him and firing laser blasts that carved meter-deep trenches into his draconic hide.

Lung himself was crushing cars and where he rubbed against the nearest buildings they crumbled, but the worst were the flames. His every breath unleashed a beam of concentrated fire that glowed white-hot and incinerated everything in its path.

When Legend spun out of the path, the dragon roared loud enough to push Taylor back a step, then grabbed a car as if it were no bigger than a pebble and flung it at the hero only to miss and have the vehicle crash into and through the wall of a building.

“That’s a lot of fire,” Taylor said. Even from as far away as she was, she could feel the warmth of the fire against her face.

“They’ll have a hard time at the hospital with this,” Amy said. Taylor had almost forgotten that the healer was next to her. “Burn victims are complicated enough at the best of times, and most hospitals haven’t recovered from Leviathan yet, they’re missing a lot of staff and there have been a lot of people getting hurt lately.”

Taylor nodded. “I hope Leviathan brought enough water.”

She heard, more than saw, a few heads turn her way. “I’m sorry, Queen Administrator,” Miss Militia asked. “What was that about Leviathan bringing water?”

“Oh, I told him to douse the fires.”

The building rumbled a little as Unit Two, riding atop a wave that reached ten stories high and that careened around the edges of the ruined PRT building, surfed towards the fire like something out of a very strange Beach Boys music video.

A violent burst of steam rose up when the water met the fires, thick enough to obscure all of their views of the streets blow. Then the steam twisted into a million tentacle-like tendrils that started smothering any of the fires that were above the wave.

A minute later, when the wave had passed, all that was left on the street were a few slagged pieces of metal that might have been cars, Lung, who had been bowled over by the wave, Leviathan, and Legend.

“Cool!” Taylor said. “Now you guys can all help if you want. You know, since there’s no fire?” She turned to find that every Protectorate hero was looking at her as if she’d grown a second head. “Or, you could all just stare at me. That’s... cool too, I guess.”

Amy snorted. “They’re not used to you yet,” she explained.

Taylor tried not to pout. “It’s not like I’m being complicated.” She folded her arms across her chest.

Legend zipped over to them atop the roof. His costume was a bit singed on the edges but otherwise he looked fine. Then again, Lung was also looking pretty healthy below them. “Thank you, Queen Administrator,” he said. “We appreciate the help. You might have saved a lot of lives with that wave.”

“No problem! I live here too, you know,” she replied.

“Nonetheless, thanks. Do you think you could get your friends to subdue him? I can’t truly hurt him without risking too much collateral damage and I can’t think of any assets already in the Bay that could take him out without risking the city.”

“You can’t be serious,” Armsmaster said.

“I agree with him,” Dauntless added in. “She’s... obviously unstable.”

Simurgh stood a little taller on the edge of the building, her eyes narrowing as she took in the hero who was no longer paying her any attention. [Indignant. Host-Power_Imbuer Small and Petty. Costume is Ugly.]

Taylor slapped a hand over her mouth to hold in a very inappropriate giggle.

“What?” Amy asked her, though she was still paying attention to the heroes who looked ready to argue.

“The Simurgh said that Dauntless’ costume is ugly.”

The hero in question huffed, then glared at the Endbringer standing behind him.

“Everyone,” Legend said. “We don’t have time for bickering. I know some of you have concerns about Queen Administrator but now is not the time for--”

“With all due respect sir,” Armsmaster began. Taylor knew that when people started a conversation with those words, respect was usually off the table. “You have obviously been compromised.”

Taylor sighed. “Simmy,” she said loud enough that everyone could hear her. “Did you do anything to Legend’s mind?” she asked.

[Today?]

Taylor suppressed a wince. “Yeah, today.”

Legend did not seem to appreciate the distinction very much.

[Negative.] she said while shaking her head.

“See,” Taylor said. Her audience wasn’t terribly receptive. Dragon was probably on her side, maybe. Amy actually seemed okay with her for the most part, and Glory Girl was still kind of terrified of Simurgh but was friendly. Cass, who was mostly quiet off to the side, was the only one definitely on Taylor’s side. Other than her two friends, that was. “Okay, fine, how about we just wrap this whole thing up for you, then you can all keep arguing?” Taylor pointed down towards Lung with a thumb.

Their attention snapped to where the dragon was squaring off against Leviathan. Every burst of fire was countered by a wall of water, but otherwise, Leviathan was keeping away from the enraged Lung.

“If you don’t mind me asking, Queen Administrator,” Miss Militia asked. “How do you suggest taking care of Lung in this situation?”

Taylor grinned. “Simmy?”

[Anticipation.]

She twisted and waved like a stage magician about to show off a trick. Her little routine ended with her pointing at Lung. “Fire the Friendship Cannon!” Taylor screamed to the heavens.

[Affirmative!] the Simurgh said.

Nothing happened.

Taylor’s enthusiasm died at about the same time as her embarrassment grew. Across the rooftop from her, Cass started laughing.

“Is this a joke?” Dauntless said.

It was still mid-afternoon on the East Coast. Perhaps, were it late into the day, they would have seen it coming out of the dark of night. Instead, the first sign was a distant wail, then the the entire sky lighting up in every hue of the rainbow.

The clouds above, darkened by rising smoke, tore apart in a great circle as a beam of coherent light smashed out of the sky and rammed into the dragon below.

The entire city rocked at the impact and Taylor had to throw an arm across her face to save her eyesight from the searing, multi-coloured beam that pierced into the ground. A second ticked by, then another and another, the beam never letting up.

The wind around them was howling and every few seconds the building they stood on would shiver as the beam pulsed.

Then, with the same suddenness that had marked its arrival, the beam disappeared.

Taylor blinked and tried to clear the rainbow-hued flashes from her eyesight.

When she could see again, she took in the street below. There was a crater. Or, perhaps it would be more accurate to say a hole. A hole so deep she couldn’t see the bottom of it, even with the sun overhead.

Leviathan stood on the edge, a familiar tattooed man held in one clawed hand.

“What the fuck.” said Dragon.

***

Next time on How to Train Your Endbringer!

Taylor goes to jail! PHO is trolled. And a new Enemy is Made.


	18. Bonus Patreon Chapter!

Bonus Chapter: In Which Rebecca Costa-Brown Develops a Headache

I just found out that this story is the story (that I wrote) with the most likes on Worm Story Search. That, and I really, really wanted to thank everyone that reads, likes and comments on this thing. So, I figured the only way I could thank y'all was to post a bit more. This is a bonus chapter. It's canon to the story, but really short.

Be entertained!

***

 

“She’s insane,” said Rebecca Costa-Brown, chief director of the Parahuman Response Team. She had just finished reading the last report from Brockton Bay on the actions of Queen Administrator during and after the Slaughterhouse Nine attack on the same city.

Across from the imposing woman sat a board-room’s worth of bureaucrats, directors, and a few representatives from the Protectorate, including Legend who had just passed a very shortened version of the Master Stranger protocols. Eidolon, the only other member of the Triumvirate present, was sitting across from him and between two screens with the images of Directors Piggot and Hearthrow. Armstrong was at the far end of the boardroom table, next to a pair of deputy directors.

It wasn’t normal for this much attention to be placed on a single cape, but if there was ever someone that fit the definition of Class-S threat, it was Queen Administrator.

“Now now, Rebecca, she’s not... insane. She just has a very unorthodox way of thinking,” Legend said. He looked at the others in the room with a charming, if hopeful smile, and only won a bunch of blank looks for his effort. “Look, she’s powerful, but so far, other than in self-defence, there have been very few incidents with her.”

Rebecca had one eyebrow climbing up into her hairline at that, but she let one of the other directors answer in her stead. “You’re kidding, right?” Armstrong said. He lifted a tablet and waved it at the Protectorate leader as if to prove a point. It kind of did when the tablet was opened to a list of incidents perpetrated by Queen Administrator. “She’s a walking disaster.”

“Yes, she’s disruptive, but it could be so, so much worse,” Legend said. “With the amount of firepower she’s toting around she could be demanding just about anything, instead she’s having tea parties and spends time cleaning the city or chatting online. She’s very reasonable in person. Before we do anything rash, it would be far safer to just ask her to try and live with us.”

“Fine, we’ll take what you said under advisement,” Costa-Brown said. “Now, our first matter of business, and these are in order of most dangerous to least. The Simurgh. She appeared, helped Queen Administrator, then started following her around the next day. Opinions?”

There was a long beat of silence around the table. Finally, SOMEONE bit the bullet. “What can we do? It’s the Simurgh. We can’t exactly wall off Brockton Bay without Queen Administrator noticing, and as reasonable as Legend claims she is, I doubt she’ll agree to live in a ghost city.”

“We could fight her. She’ll be weighted down by having to protect the girl,” Eidolon said from the far end of the table. It was the first thing the caped Triumvirate parahuman had said after greeting everyone.

Hearthrow snorted. “There are words for people who would attack two Endbringers at the same time. Those words aren’t for polite company.”

“Or, she could ask one Endbringer to keep her safe while the other one fights without holding back, as they’ve clearly been doing for the past twenty-odd years,” Piggot shot back. In the woman’s mind was an image of the crater that her city would become if a fight of that magnitude took place in it. And to think that a few weeks ago she was merely worried about nazis.

One of the deputy directors coughed. “We could always ask the Simurgh what to do,” he said as he lifted a phone up. Just about everyone recognized PHO’s layout. “She’s doing an AMA.”

Rebecca pressed her face into her hands. “Is there any way we could contain it?”

“It’s on the world boards. She’s started answering questions in other languages and from just about everywhere. Most of her answers seem to be pretty... uh,” he flushed. “Pretty troll-y.”

“We’ll watch,” Rebecca decided. “And we’ll find a way to get her on our side. She was brought in for questioning, correct?” she asked. “Very well, who’s the one interrogating her?”

“Director Tagg,” someone answered.

Rebecca wanted to wince. Tagg was a very good director. He wasn’t a terribly charismatic man, though, and could come off as aggressive at the best of times. She leaned back into her chair and clenched a fist under the table. Things were quickly spiraling out of control. Or at least, she noticed, out of their control. The Hebert girl had yet to really do anything horrible. In fact, as Legend had said, she was fairly non-threatening given her powers. The problem was she didn’t answer to the Protectorate, Wards, or any other organization. Even if she joined a gang it would have been better than this... nothing.

Queen Administrator, as a cape, didn’t fit into any of the neat little boxes. She was an outsider, someone outside the range of anyone’s control. And if she had some silly, simple power, like being a super-mime or being a lizard-Changer, then they would let her do her own thing.

The problem wasn’t that Queen Administrator was ridiculously strong, it was that she was strong and yet didn’t have any of the organizational restraints that the PRT and government were built to pull on.

“Send a message to Tagg to wear his kid gloves for this one. We don’t need to antagonize her. As for the Simurgh, I want a constant watch on her. Ask Dragon if she’d be willing to help, but get some of our Tinkers to see if they can track her and Queen Administrator too.” Rebecca waited until all the right people had noted what she said, then moved on. “Our next point, the... Friendship Cannon.”

“You mean the giant rainbow beam that came out of nowhere this afternoon?” Armstrong said. “We could see it from Boston.”

A few eyes turned towards Piggot and the woman nodded. “The... cannon was used against a ramped up Lung, the leader of the Azn Bad Boys. We captured him a week ago. Mannequin of the Slaughterhouse Nine did something to him over the course of an hour. Judging by the report from CSI, Mannequin operated on both Lung and Fenja from the Empire Eighty Eight. The latter died during the operation. Armsmaster suggested that somehow Bonesaw and Mannequin developed a way to transfer powers from one cape to another, or to combine them.”

Piggot coughed. “Lung’s usual ability to ramp up combined with Fenja’s ability to grow exponentially larger and stronger turned him into what would easily be an S-Class threat in the middle of downtown Brockton Bay. I know Legend tried to subdue him to little success.”

Legend nodded. “His regeneration was rather incredible, and he seemed to grow harder and harder to hurt as the battle progressed. When Leviathan doused the fires he had set, I had a few moments to ask Queen Administrator for help.” He waved at Piggot to continue.

“Yes, and she, in turn, asked the Simurgh to... fire the Friendship Cannon. That’s when the beam came down after a short delay. It left a hole. It’s two thousand meters deep, twenty wide at the widest point, and shaped exactly like a heart.”

“A heart?” Eidolon said. “Like, an anatomically correct one?”

Piggot shook her head, then made a heart symbol with both hands. “No, a girly heart symbol.”

“Lung was hit?” Director Hearthrow from Chicago asked.

“He was. A direct hit, if Armsmaster’s report is to be believed. Leviathan caught him before he fell into the hole.” Piggot closed her eyes to prepare herself before delivering the next lines. “He’s since recovered and is in our custody. He’s... changed.”

“Changed how?” Rebecca asked.

“He exhibits friendly behaviour. Is more open, and won’t stop smiling. He tried to hug some of my Troopers, saying that hugs... look, I have footage.”

The Director focused on her computer and soon everyone in the room received a ping on their tablets. A dozen videos started playing at the same time.

The video opened to the inside of a PRT holding cell, white walls with a cot in one corner and a toilette in the other. A tall man covered in asian dragon tattoos stood in the middle of the room, face barely concealed by a domino mask.

A voice filled the room, calm and placid, the voice of a typical interrogator. “For the record, you are the Parahuman known as Lung.”

“Oh yes, that’s what all my friends call me!” Lung said. He was smiling, showing off twin rows of perfect teeth.

“Very well, thank you. My name is Richard, I will be interrogating you. Now, Lung, could you tell us what happened this afternoon between the hours of 1000 and 1200?”

“Oh boy, can I ever!” Lung nodded, his smiling never changing. “I was in this wonderful little cell, just like this one, in fact. And I was eating my lunch. Did you know that veggies are part of a balanced diet, Richard?”

“I... yes.” 

“That’s great! You’ll grow into a big strong boy if you eat your veggies.”

“I -- thank you, Lung. Could you continue to recount the events that transpired after you ate your lunch.”

Lung grinned. “Yuppers. No problem, Richie my buddy. Now, here I was, eating my yummy yummy balanced lunchy, when this mean, mean man came in. He did some mean mean things to me, and he interrupted my lunch! Do you know, that’s a terrible thing, Richie. 

“Could you describe the man?”

“Oh, he looked like a bunch of bits and bobs, all stuck together by noodles. I used to eat a lot of noodles. Oodles and oodles of noodles, but I know better now. My, I remember a time where if I didn’t eat my noodles, I’d go boo-hoo-hoodles! Oh, but that mean mean man wasn’t so bad! If it wasn't for him, I wouldn’t have met the great and stupendous Queenie Administratie again!”

Piggot paused the video. “It’s like that for hours. He keeps trying to hug PRT personnel. And he sings childish rhymes in Japanese. And he... he dances and tries to convince others to sing along with him. But at least he’s cooperative.”

Armstrong was the first to speak. “That’s even more terrifying than if she’d just killed him outright. Has he been checked out by our Thinkers? Has Panacea looked at him yet?”

“Not yet, it’s only been a few hours. And no, she’s taking care of those hurt during the incident.”

Eidolon raised an arm like a student in a classroom. “Any idea of where the beam originated?”

Piggot sighed. “Space. I asked Dragon and she traced it back to somewhere past the moon. The beam... curved around the moon, then crossed four hundred thousand kilometers or so to hit Lung. We don’t have a visual on the cannon yet. We might never get one unless it moves out of the moon’s shadow or we send out a probe of some sort.”

The room went silent again.

Rebecca really wished she was alone in the room so that she could rub her temples in peace.

***

Mucho Cred to A.B.Christensen, Vhalidictes and eschwartz!


	19. Chapter 19

In Which Taylor Goes to Jail and Does Not Collect 200 Cookies

Armsmaster insisted that Taylor come in for a ‘polite debriefing.’ So that’s how Taylor found herself locked up in a ten by ten room with white walls and a pair of really uncomfortable chairs set around a table bolted to the floor. All this, of course, in the middle of the Downtown headquarters of the BPD.

They had to shuffle things around, apparently, on account of the PRT building being all exploded and the like, so she had spent a good hour waiting in a PRT van under armed guard while everyone pretended--rather badly, in her opinion--that she wasn’t a prisoner.

She should have asked if they were going to let her stew for hours on end with nothing to do. Heck, she wasn’t even allowed to order Simmy and Leviathan to not get up to trouble. For all she knew she was locked in here because the outside world was one big zombie apocalypse. And she was missing all the fun!

Huffing, Taylor reached into the folds of her robe and found her phone.

**> >Queen_Administrator: Dragon? How long are they gonna keep me in here? Cause I’m ready to blow this popsicle stand.**

**> >Dragon: Please be patient, Taylor. They’re bringing in someone for the debriefing from out-of-state. I believe he’s arrived already but it might still take him a moment to get to you.**

**> >Queen_Administrator: Oh, is it someone cool?**

**> >Dragon: Unfortunately, I don’t think he would fit your definition of cool. Sorry.**

Taylor pouted and leaned back into the super uncomfortable chair. That hadn’t been what she wanted to hear. She looked at the time on her phone. It was almost four in the afternoon. If she didn’t leave before five she was going to get home after Dad and that would probably worry him.

Yeah, that wasn’t going to fly. Taylor decided that she was leaving by four thirty.

She figured that she might as well do something fun with her time while waiting though. With a few clicks she was back to her favourite online haunt.

 

**Welcome to the Parahumans Online Message Boards**   
**You are currently logged in, Queen_Administrator (Verified Cape)**   
**You are viewing:**   
**Threads you have replied to**   
**AND Threads that have new replies**   
**OR private message conversations with new replies**   
**Thread OP is displayed**   
**Five posts per page**   
**Last ten messages in private message history**   
**Threads and private messages are ordered by user custom preference.**

 

Taylor’s practiced eye scrolled past a few threads that she’d been poking at already. One of the most popular threads in the US right now was about her, so that was cool. It was kind of like being a celebrity, only it was mostly people screaming and panicking about her bringing about the end of the world and less people wondering about her sex life or whatever other stuff passed for celebrity gossip.

She wondered if maybe things were better the way they were.

 

**♦Topic: Simurgh Sighted?**   
**In: Boards ► Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay Discussion (Public Board)**

**♦Topic: The Queen Administrator and You: How Not to Get Drowned by an Angry Water Lizard**   
**In: Boards ► Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay Discussion (Public Board)**

**♦Topic: Slaughterhouse Nine in the Bay!**   
**In: Boards ► Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay Discussion (Public Board)**

**♦Topic: The PRT HQ just exploded. WTF?**   
**In: Boards ► Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay Discussion (Public Board)**

**♦Topic: Looking 4 volunteers: cleanup - rebuilding - distribution**   
**In: Boards ► Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay Discussion (Public Board)**

 

With a curious hum, Taylor clicked on the first topic. It would be nice to know how the Bay, at least, was reacting to her newest friend.

 

**♦Topic: Simurgh Sighted?**   
**In: Boards ► Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay Discussion (Public Board)**

**(Showing Page 01 of 76)**

**■**

**►Bagrat (The Guy in the Know) (Original Poster)**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**Alright, I’ve got a big one for all of you Brocktonites and probably everyone else on the East Coast. Buckle up because this one’s kind of wild.**

**Now, I don’t have as much confirmation as I would want on this one. Nearly half of my informants in the Bay confirm it, the other half don’t have anything concrete for me. The worst thing is I have exactly no footage to prove anything. And that, in and of itself, might be evidence.**

**As you may be aware (and there’s another post on the subject which you can find HERE) the Slaughterhouse Nine have been sighted in Brockton Bay. It seems as though they met with Queen Administrator, interrupting a picnic she was having with an unspecified person. That was yesterday afternoon.**

**This is where the reports get weird.**

**The Simurgh was sighted, supposedly fighting against the Nine.**

**Now, some people tell me that she was fighting for them, others that she was fighting with Queen Administrator. Some that QA is dead and is now the Simurgh’s flesh puppet.**

**I’m waiting for confirmation from some sort of official source, in the meantime, any image of the Simurgh in the Bay would be greatly appreciated.**

**■**

**►Just_A_Chick**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**I really hope you’re wrong Bagrat because fuck if I’m staying here with the great white bitch around.**

**►Franklymylove**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**Can confirm. I was coming down from downtown where the place where I work just reopened, and then there was a huge wall of glass. I figre I’m dead, right? Shatterbird’s doing her thing nad I’m done for. Then Queen Admin. Comes around on Levi like a bat outta hell with the Siberian after her. I figure I’m double dead and then I’ll be eaten too.**

**Then the Simurgh comes out of the goddam sky like some sort of avenging angel, pops the siberian by staring at her or some shit, wrecks some poor shit’s van, and then screams at shatterbird. I got home some bit later and there were bits of shatterbird on my fucking car’s roof.**

**►Veges**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**@ Franklymylove**   
**That entire story is so full of shit it’s almost belivable.**   
**Try the other one?**

**►Earthgirl**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**I saw the Simurgh floating next to Brockton Bay General this afternoon. Tried to take a picture, but my phone was off even though I never turn it off, then by the time it was on she was gone. Scariest thing I’ve ever seen. I think she threw something out of the hospital, but I didn’t see it land.**

**►xXxFighterxXx**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**I was at the super market looking for stuff since they’ve started restocking and lots of stuff at home went bad while we didn’t have power. Anyway, saw Queen Administrator and decided to take a few pics. LINK and LINK. Looks like she was going to make a lot of sandwiches or something. Whatever, right? It’s cool to see a cape but this is Brockton Bay. Still, nice to see that even Miss Endbringer needs to eat.**

**Then Legend walks in. LINK LINK pics because no way would anyone believe me otherwise. Also, Queen Admin got Legend to say that he’s a daddy (eyebrow waggle).**

**They talk, Legend helps Queen Admin bag her things LINK (check the chasier’s face!) and then they leave. I figure that’s that, then I step out. Leviathan with a hat I was expecting, and he was there playing with some rando girl. And so was the Simurgh. My camera’s battery gave out just as I tried to take a pic. Same with my phone’s. Same with my backuip phone.**

**Scary shit.**

**►AsheSheep**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**So... Queen Administrator has two Endbringers now?**

**How big should the alter to our queen and overlord be? I’m thinking at least six feet, to make room for the human sacrifices.**

**►123Tobias**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**I still call bullshit. There’s no way that those pics are real. Yeah, maybe QA went to the groceries because, fuck it, she’s crazy and can do whatever, but Legend? There’re plenty of pics of him, it’d be super easy to photoshop that kind of thing.**

**►It’s_Called_Lending**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**Can confirm, saw the Simurgh flying around too.**

**►TheMoonWolf**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**How’s the weather on the West coast this time of year?**

 

Taylor snorted at the panic. People were being so damned silly. She skipped to the last page real quick and started typing. It was time to put some rumours to rest.

 

**(Showing Page 76 of 76)**

**►FootKicker555**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**Look, from a legal standpoint... it’s really vague. Do you treat the Endbringers like pets? If so, they’d be rabid animals and some of the blame would fall on the owner. On the other hand, if you treat them like people, tehn Queen Adminstrator would only be responsible for giving refuge to a criminal... kinda. I don’t recall anyone actually pressing charges against the Endbringers. They’ve sorta been treates like natural disasters so far.**

**►SerialKillingDolphin**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**I work for a bank that I won’t name. We just got a demand from the PRT this afternoon about sending a LOT of money over. When we asked which account it was from, turns out someone is claiming the bounties on the Siberian, Hatchet Face and Shatterbird.**

**Just thought I’d spread the good news around. Don’t know if the stories about the Simurgh being the one that got those kills is true or what, but someone is claiming the cash.**

**►Queen_Administrator (Verified Cape)**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**Hey everyone!**

**I saw all those posts about Simmy and I just wanted to make sure that the rumours don’t go too far. So I’ll just confirm that the Simurgh has joined our happy little family this morning. I think she was doing something to people who were trying to take pictures of her. Sorry about that. I’m sure any mental influence she used to make you not take her picture will wear off eventually.**

**I’m not really sure what she was up to all of last night though, so if she did anything between then and about 8-ish this morning, it’s totally not my fault.**

**I’ll ask her to stop with all the mind-rapey stuff later, but I’m kinda busy right now.**

**Yeah, Simmy and I kinda-accidentally-maybe killed Shatterbird and the Siberian. Oh, and Hatchet Face too, but he was being mean to Glory Girl and Panacea so Simmy threw him into orbit.**

**PS: The Simurgh has a few PHO accounts! Apprerently she’s been on here for a while now.**

**►Winged_One**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**Hi!**

**@ Queen_Chrysalis_Truffle**   
**No trickery involved. I really do have a few PHO accounts.**

**►Queen_Chrysalis_Truffle**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**Okay... okay, but the Simurgh can’t actually have a PHO account. That’s just silly.**

**Maybe someone tricked Queen Administrator into thinking... but then... I don’t know.**

**Edit: Fuck.**

 

Taylor started to giggle to herself. She could only imagine the reaction of all the people out there who were going to freak out. She tabbed out of the browser app she was using to check on PHO and opened her messenger. “Hey, Simmy, is Winged_One your account?”

[Affirmative.]

“Hrm,” she said. “Do you want me to ask Dragon to verify it?”

[Enthusiasm. Affirmative!]

Taylor nodded to the request, unable to keep a small smile off her face as she took in just how happy the Simurgh sounded.

 

**> >Queen_Administrator: Hey, Dragon, are you still there?**

**> >Dragon: Of course. I’m still coordinating emergency services at the ‘Heart Pit’ but it’s been calm for the past half hour or so. What’s wrong?**

**> >Queen_Administrator: Oh, well, I was kinda bored, so I went on PHO. Anyway, to make a long story short, I was wondering how the Simurgh could verify her account.**

**> >Dragon: You want me to verify the Simurgh’s PHO account?**

**> >Queen_Administrator: Is she supposed to take a picture or something? Her account name is Winged_One.**

**> >Dragon: Taylor, you’re a real sweetheart, but sometimes you ask for the weirdest things. I have a sinking feeling that if I say no I’ll find out that she did it already, so sure, why not. Give it a minute.**

**> >Queen_Administrator: Awesome! Thanks Dragon, you’re the best!**

Taylor decided that she really ought to do something nice for Dragon. Then again, what sort of gift could someone give the world’s best Tinker? Maybe she could ask Simmy later.

 

**♦Topic: Simurgh AMA**   
**In: Boards ► Boards ► Places ► World**

**(Showing Page 01 of 03)**

**■**

**►Winged_One (Verified Endbringer) (Original Poster)**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**Hi!**

**I’m Ziz, Israfel, Ulama, the Hopekiller. The Simurgh.**

**Ask Me Anything!**

**■**

**►Winged_One (Verified Endbringer) (Original Poster)**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**

**@ SuperLazy**   
**It isn’t.**

**@ CJOneofMany**   
**I don’t know, I think it’s rather entertaining, actually.**

**►SuperLazy**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**Is this some sort of joke?**

**►CJOneofMany**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**This is so not funny.**

**►Winged_One (Verified Endbringer) (Original Poster)**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**

**@ Absolute**   
**I didn’t, she died while rushing into a shelter. But that’s not what you want to hear. The truth is that I was following directives that I had no choice but to obey. I have new ones now, though.**

**@ DeoVox**   
**Nope.**

**@ WanderingWriter**   
**Nice observation! But you’re a little bit wrong. Also, your date’s going to be late tomorrow. Don’t drink the milk at the back of your fridge, it’s expired. You don’t want the runs on a date, even if you’ll end up breaking up in six months.**

**►Absolute**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**Why did you kill my mom?**

**►DeoVox**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**Were you ever human?**

**►WanderingWriter**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**Okay, this thread is giving me the creeps. How in the hell is the OP posting replies before the questions are posted? Like, I looked at the entry times and it’s literally seconds. Some of those had to have clicked on Enter already before OP had time to reply. It doesn’t makes sense, so I’m calling hijinks. Probably people picked out to reply with pre-written things sending them at a predetermined time.**

**►Winged_One (Verified Endbringer) (Original Poster)**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**Oh my, so many questions! It’s a good thing I answered them all months ago.**

**@ InsaneSith78**   
**I wouldn’t say it with that tone, but yes.**

**@ Veritas_Per_Ficta**   
**Oh! You’re one of the fallen that worship me. It’s very flattering. I always was the prettiest of the Units, so you obviously chose well. Also, the sacrifices are unnecessary. I don’t need you killing people for me. I’m a big Endbringer, I can do that for myself.**

**@ ThanatostheLight**   
**Oh, good question! I can’t name the cape that awakened us, but he’s pretty popular. Bit of an ass too. Woke us up just because he was bored, really. I’d have preferred to stay dormant and for him to just get laid, but c’est la vie.**

**@ LeafEater**   
**You want my opinion on food? You do know that I’m an immortal engine of chaos and destruction that requires no sustenance, right? Also, I have a soft spot for marshmallows. You’ll note that I have attacked exactly no marshmallow factories.**

**@ SoldierofPlastic**   
**-Can we get a list of ziz-bombs?**   
**No.**   
**-Where do the Endbringers come from?**   
**Space.**   
**-Scion vs Simurgh. Who would win?**   
**Scion, unless I get tricky.**   
**-Is that group that sells powers real?**   
**Yes.**   
**-What's the future like?**   
**Pretty fun for me, but I imagine it’s a lot more stressful if you’re mortal.**

**@ XxXVoid_CowboyXxX**   
**I forwarded that comment to your mother.**

**@ Queen_Administrator**   
**Don’t worry, I won’t say anything that would make you upset!**

**►InsaneSith78**   
**Posted on May 30, 2011:**   
**This is all Queen Admin’s fault, isn’t it?**

Taylor was about to make another post, mostly to calm people down, when the door slammed open. A man barged in, wearing a formal looking suit and tie with the PRT shield pinned to one lapel. A tag was clipped to his breast pocket with the name Director James Tagg on it.

A woman followed after him in an ill-fitting business suit made of some pinkish fabric. She smiled at Taylor as though she were some sort of handicapped kitten. She had a tag on her lapel but it only read ‘Youth Guard.’

Tagg walked across the room, around the table, and tore the phone out of Taylor’s hand. “What were you doing?” he barked.

“Uh, I was on PHO?” Taylor tried. She shrank back into her seat as the man leaned in towards her, his expression promising punishments of the cruel and unusual sort.

“You’re in a cell, Miss Hebert, do you know what that means?” he asked.

“You know my name?” Taylor asked. She had a sinking feeling in her gut.

“Of course we know your name. We’re the PRT, not some useless fools running around like headless chickens. We’re not like you, Miss Hebert.” He tossed her phone onto the table where it landed with a clatter, then he sat across from her. Two others walked in, both in the identity-hiding armour of PRT Troopers. “You are currently under arrest for acts of terrorism, grand theft and treason against the United States of America, Miss Hebert.”

“What?” Taylor squeaked.

***

Dun dun DUNN!

Tune in next time on How to Train Your Endbringer!

In which Taylor has a discussion. Cookies are finally eaten. Dragon gets motherly. And no one knows what the Simurgh is up to, not even the author!

Mucho Cred to Vhalidictes and eschwartz!


	20. Chapter 20

In Which Taylor Has Her Cookies and Eats Them Too!

Director Tagg had grown up a military child. His father was a corporal and his mother an auxiliary nurse. He had visions of the America that was and the America that could be fed to him every day of his young life. When he grew old enough he joined the armed forces, then the PRT when the organization appeared in the ‘80s.

He was a career man, he was always the advocate for hard choices leading to a better tomorrow. And right now he was standing across a table from a fifteen year old girl who was so far out of her depth she should have been drowning. Instead she was floundering about with her pet Endbringers and ruining what little safety was left to the proud people of Brockton Bay.

“I, I didn’t do anything like that!” Taylor Hebert said, her voice shaking with suppressed fear. He wanted to smile but suppressed the urge. He had to keep reminding himself that the ditzy girl sitting across from him had two weapons of mass destruction at her beck and call.

If she was going to slip under their control he needed to make her want their help. The PRT could protect her, could shelter and guide her. As things stood now, she was a menace and had to realise it.

“Oh, then let’s go through your record, shall we?” He motioned at one of the troopers that had followed him in. The man handed him a beige file-folder which he slapped onto the desk. “May 16th. Reportedly the day after your trigger. You initiate a conflict with the Empire Eighty Eight and murder Kaiser, their leader.”

“What? But that was an accident--”

“May 17th. After spending the morning with two known supervillains of the Undersiders gang, you harass the local rogue Parian. At noon you visit the PRT headquarters and are intercepted by Lung. You then proceed to order your... pet, to assault him leading to the destruction of some PRT property and the eventual capture of said parahuman after he was brutalised.”

“What? He asked for a fight--”

“The very next day you assaulted the Rig, destroyed a million-dollar Tinkertech shield generator, then left before we could question you. That same afternoon your pet hit the city with a tsunami.”

“Hey, that was for cleaning!”

Tagg glowered at her and flipped over a page. He couldn’t let her take control of the conversation. She’d done it to Legend and Dragon before and they were both lost to her already. “You went quiet for a week during which the PRT and Protectorate were preparing a response to your previous actions, but before we had time to do anything, you broke your curfew to... go on a picnic. You encountered Jack Slash and were potentially compromised before leaving the scene. Reports indicate that you then murdered the parahumans known as Squealer, Skidmark and Mush of the Archer’s Bridge Merchants.”

“Well, they shouldn’t have attacked me!” the girl yelled. She leaned forwards in her chair, and what little he could see of her face lost whatever joviality it usually held. There, she was getting angry. Now he had to pull back. Like reeling a fish in.

“Then the Simurgh showed up.” Tagg slammed the file closed with enough force that the girl jumped in her seat. “You, and everyone else in this city, are compromised.” Tagg rubbed at the bridge of his nose. “Look kid, it’s not looking great. I get that you’re doing your best out there but you’re still just a teenager with two WMDs following you. You need help.” Yes. Let her see that he was actually on her side. It was a bait and switch that had worked for him before with other unstable parahumans.

The woman that had come with Tagg, Janice or some such, placed a hand on his shoulder and leaned forwards. “Sweetheart, we just want the best for you. You’re far too young to be making any big decisions. Let the nice people in the PRT take care of everything. We’re adults, we know best,” she said.

Tagg glared at the woman. She was patronizing the kid. He might agree with the Youth Guard in this instance but that was no reason to talk to the cape as though she were a rambunctious ten-year-old.

Taylor pointed at her. “Who are you?”

The woman giggled and it sounded incredibly fake to Tagg’s ear. “I’m just a concerned citizen. I represent the Youth Guard, the group that makes sure that all little ones with powers are treated with the care and attention they deserve.”

He saw it arrive slowly. First she sat straighter, then her eyes narrowed under the folds of her hood and her mouth turned into a narrow line. “Mister Tagg, what do you want?”

“I want you in the Wards yesterday,” he said.

“Why?”

He allowed himself to grin. “We can protect you from your own actions so far, and you could use the legal advice, girl.”

Taylor shook her head. “That’s not true. We both know that Simmy and Levi can protect me better than you could. I think you have another reason to want me in the Wards.”

She was going on the offensive. The opposite of what he wanted.

The simpering woman next to Tagg pressed a hand over her heart. “Oh, sweetie, you shouldn’t have to rely on those... monsters for your protection. We can help you.”

Taylor Hebert paused for a few long seconds, then she shifted, turning from a girl in over her head into the Queen Administrator. She leveled a glare at the woman that should have had her writhing on the floor. Then she tried on a smile that made Tagg’s spine tingle.

She was more astute than her file gave her credit for. He could still shift this into a win, he just needed time. “I want you in the Wards because you’re a menace to everything right and good in this country.”

The girl stared at him and he stared right back. “No. I don’t think I want to be a Ward.” There was a note of finality in her voice that left no room for negotiations.

He nodded, if only to himself. That route was closed. Or at least wouldn’t be viable for a while. But there were other options. The Protectorate wouldn’t like it but she could join them, or one of the military cape groups. It would give her the protection she needed, the control the government wanted, and some of the freedom she desired.

The door creaked as it opened. “Queen Administrator?” a tinny voice said and Tagg broke eye contact to take in the woman standing behind him. Dragon, in one of her smaller suits. Her armoured form walked in, then slid off to the side as though unconcerned about the Troopers in the room. Then again, they only had foam weapons and she was the woman who produced the stuff. “Director Tagg,” she said. “Miss...”

“Oh, my name’s Janice. Just Janice, Miss Dragon,” the Youth Guard rep said.

“Dragon, what are you doing here? This interview is a PRT matter,” he said.

Dragon’s head tilted from him to Taylor and back. “Is it an interview or an interrogation?”

“Either way, it would be outside your jurisdiction,” he said.

“I see.” Dragon turned towards Taylor. “As the Director has no doubt informed you, if this is a legal interrogation, then you have the right to an attorney. Now, I have never represented anyone but myself before, but I think you’ll find that I’m rather familiar with things pertaining to the legal system. I also have all the necessary documentation to serve as an attorney in this state. Do you want me to represent you?”

The Director huffed and stood up, crossing his arms over his chest. “This isn’t an interrogation, just a friendly chat,” he said.

“And little Taylor hardly needs you to help her,” Janice said, her face twisting into another semblance of a smile. “She has us.”

The phone on one corner of the table buzzed, then Tagg’s voice came out of it. “You are currently under arrest for acts of terrorism, grand theft and treason against the United States of America, Miss Hebert.” In his mind he was swearing.

Dragon stared at Tagg and Taylor’s face twisted into an uncertain smile. “Certainly with such grave accusations you have a warrant on hand? Dispensation from the district attorney? Maybe a letter from someone that actually had the clout to level that sort of accusation against Miss Hebert?”

The Director’s knuckles went white on the table. “Dammit Dragon, she’s a menace,” he growled. “We need to have her on our side. She needs our guidance.”

Dragon ignored him and turned back to Taylor. “Seeing as how the good director seems to have made a somewhat... fluid accusation with no real legal backing I think congratulations are in order. You’re a free woman,” she said, her voice wry.

Taylor snorted but jumped to her feet. “Thanks for the save,” she said before grabbing her phone and checking on it. The time was nearly four thirty on the screen, he noted. “I was going to give him another couple of minutes before leaving, but it was getting boring.”

“You would have broken out of our custody?” Tagg asked. Would she have, or was it a bluff? Could he play the bluffing game with her? It had backfired just now, but not as badly as it might have. Legend’s report was right about one thing: she was reasonable, in her own way.

Taylor shrugged. “I need to be home before five,” she said as if it was self-evident. “I mean, if you weren’t such a grumpy pants I might have listened more, but you’re being really mean.”

Tagg’s face shifted through a few expressions and settled on neutral. He felt, if anything, like a man that had just made a gamble and lost. “Very well. You are free to go, Miss Hebert,” he said. “Remember: you can’t get away with everything.”

Taylor walked past him then paused by the doorway. “You didn’t get a lot of hugs, did you?” she asked the director’s back.

That shouldn’t have stung as much as it did.

***

“So, what was that?” Taylor asked.

“You need to understand, Taylor, that you scare a lot of people,” Dragon said. “Some people react to fear by fighting back. I think Tagg is one of those.”

Taylor huffed. “Well, he was a bit of a jerk.”

[Shame. Unit-03 is to Blame.]

Taylor almost missed a step. “What?” she asked.

Dragon turned her way but Taylor couldn’t read her past the helmet. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, just...” Taylor waved at the side of her head. “Talking to Simmy.”

“Oh?” Dragon said, and it was pitched exactly the way her mother used to speak when trying to get Taylor to confess to something.

Taylor nodded. “Um, if I’m talking to the air, it’s not because I’m crazy, okay?”

Dragon laughed and nodded. “No worries. I’ve seen stranger powers, especially Stranger powers.”

“Right, cool,” Taylor said. She coughed to clear her throat. “Simmy, care to explain that last one?”

[Embarrassed. Used Mind-Manipulation on Organic ‘James Tagg’ under Previous Primary Directive. Turned Organic into Precognitive Bomb.]

With one hand pressed against her forehead, Taylor sighed. “How many of those do you have?”

[Many.]

“Well, snickerdoodles.”

“What is it?” Dragon asked. They were nearing the exit now, with only a few guards and a pair of double doors between them and freedom.

Taylor waved her hand in a noncommittal gesture. “Tagg is a Simurgh bomb. Or whatever they’re called. That, and some other bad news but I’m not sure what to think about that yet.”

Dragon, showing a surprising amount of restraint, didn’t say anything until they were outside again. “I’ll see what I can do about Tagg. I didn’t appreciate what he was trying to do in there, but I can see why they would want you on their side. Now more than ever.”

“Yeah, I get it, I’m a teensy bit scary.”

Dragon laughed. “A bit, yes.” She placed a hand on Taylor’s shoulder and gave it a squeeze. “Be careful, okay? And if anyone bothers you again, feel free to call me.”

Taylor looked at the hand on her shoulder, then up at Dragon. She felt her eyes watering a little but blinked it away. “Alright,” she said in what was almost a whisper.

“Oh, and Taylor,” Dragon said. She reached down to her side and an opening popped up on her suit. “Your cookies. I think you deserve them.”

Taylor grinned as she took the warm paper bag from Dragon’s clawed hand. “Thanks!”

Maybe, she thought, the day had been pretty good after all. She watched Dragon back away then take to the sky.

“Oh, crud, I forgot Cass!”

***

“How did it go?” Piggot asked. She was leaning back into an aluminium chair in what passed for her office now that the local PRT HQ was in ruins.

Tagg hesitated. “It... could have gone worse.”

One of Piggot’s eyebrows rose. “Oh, do tell how attacking the walking disaster didn’t work out for you?” The sarcasm was thicker than syrup.

He glared. “You know as well as I that it was a calculated risk.”

“You must be very bad at math,” she said. “You never trapped her, Tagg. She will only ever be trapped if she wants to be. She was humouring you.”

“Tsk, with all due respect, Piggot, that’s bullshit,” he said. “We need her to see things our way and that won’t happen if she spends her days gallivanting around and having picnics with her pet Endbringers.”

Piggot leaned onto her elbows and crossed her fingers one over the other. It was the woman’s equivalent of slamming her fist on the table. “Tagg, you might want her under your thumb. You might want her acting like a proper dog of the government, and trust me, I can understand the desire. But I would rather have her organize tea parties every day for the next century than to have her turn around one day and bite the hand holding her collar. She’s a force of nature. You don’t chain those, you learn to lean against the wind and live on.”

He got up and started pacing. “I don’t like it.”

Piggot growled then pulled out a stack of paperwork, dismissing him as she did so. “Fucking live with it, Tagg.”

***

Taylor made it to the hill in record time thanks to the Simurgh carrying her over while Leviathan took to the streets. She had been a little reluctant about the whole flying thing at first, but now she thought she might be a little bit addicted to it.

They landed to find that Cass was already there, packing up the blanket which she’d folded into the basket that the Dallon sisters had brought along. Around that was a dozen plastic bags, most still filled with uneaten food. “‘Bout time you showed up,” Cass said.

“Heh, sorry about that. The PRT were being big meanies,” Taylor said. She moved to help Cass, then ran into a bit of a problem when she realised she was still holding the bag with Dragon’s cookies. She opened it up with a crackle of unfolding paper. “So, you still looking for a place to stay?”

“Depends, what did you have in mind if I said yeah?”

Taylor shrugged, then pulled out what looked like a picture-perfect chocolate chip cookie from the bag. “We don’t really have a guest room at my place, but there’s a couch, and we have one of those air mattresses. It’d be like a sleepover! And, not to brag or anything, but my house is pretty darn safe.”

Cass looked at her two Endbringer buddies and snorted. “Yeah, alright. Just for a couple of nights, until I can find something on my own.”

“That’s fine,” Taylor said. She smiled at Cass, then sank her teeth into the cookie.

Her world froze.

The cookie was still warm to the touch and soft, so soft. Her teeth sank through with only the barest of crunches, just enough that the flavour of it exploded into her mouth. Then her tongue touched one of the chips which promptly melted into a tiny ball of happiness. She swallowed, then almost compulsively took another bite.

The second bite was better than the first. She felt tears in the edges of her eyes and when she sniffed to clear them her sense of smell was taken over by the irresistible aroma of eau-de-cookie.

“You alright?” Cass asked.

Taylor tilted the bag towards her friend, wanting to share. But a small voice in the back of her mind started screaming. If Cass took a cookie, it said, then that was one less cookie for her. She pushed past it, waiting for her friend to grab one of the cookies, sniff it, then bite.

Cass paused. “Oh.”

“I have milk at home,” Taylor said.

They broke the sound barrier.

***

Danny Hebert arrived at home just a little bit tired. It had been a long day where he juggled not only his usual workload, but that of a few others. There was plenty of work to go around, which was about the only good thing he could say about the last week.

He took off his jacket and tossed it onto the couch, then shucked off his muddy boots. Immediately, he felt himself grow lighter now that the coat was off and his feet ached with pleasure at being freed.

“Taylor?” he called.

“Mmm,” came the rather indistinct reply.

Curious, he followed the sound towards the kitchen and paused by the entrance.

Taylor was there, sitting at the table across from a girl wearing a Panacea T-shirt and what looked like nurse pants. On the table, a jug of milk had been pushed aside to make room for a brown paper bag that had been placed on its side. Two half-empty mugs of milk sat before each girl.

His daughter was wearing her costume, he noticed, the strange robe made of a hundred tassels of multicoloured cloth. The hood was off, so he could see her dazed expression and the way she was squirming, thighs rubbing together under the table.

“Taylor?”

“Mmm? Daddy?”

“Yes Taylor, it’s me,” he said. He started picking up the cups, then the paper bag which he sniffed experimentally. It smelled like cookies, and not the special kind. He was a little worried that his sweetheart would fall into bad habits.

“Oh, dad, that’s Cass. Can she stay over?” Taylor said.

He took in the girl in her rather poor state of dress and the way she was snoring softly, her face pressed against the kitchen table. “Sure thing, Taylor. How was your day?”

Taylor perked up at that, then started recounting what was probably an edited version of her adventures. He smiled as he listened to her prattle on.

***

It was a subdued pair of girls that made their way upstairs. Both of them were smacking their lips, chasing after the memory of a taste. Finally, they made it to Taylor’s room and the girl in question led the way in.

“So, uh, I’ve got extra blankets and I think we have a pillow somewhere,” Taylor said. She started rummaging in her closet until she found the blankets and tossed them on her bed. Meanwhile, Cass was still taking in Taylor’s room.

Taylor wasn’t super proud of her room. It was mostly a place to store her clothes and books and a place to take a nap. When she was younger and Emma was still Emma, this was a wonderful place where she could laugh and have fun. Now it was just another room.

“What’s this?” Cass asked. She lifted a notebook from Taylor’s nightstand. It had a doodle on the front of a chibi Leviathan with his mouth wide open with the word ‘rawr’ written next to him, and on his shoulder was a cartoony Taylor in her Queen Administrator costume.

“Oh, that’s nothing,” Taylor said. She slid towards Cass and took the book before rubbing the cover with a thumb. She opened her nightstand drawer and pushed it in. “Anyway, I found a pillow. I hope you don’t mind the floor?”

Cass shrugged. “I’ve had worse, trust me. It’s warm and soft enough, I’ll live.”

The girls spent a few minutes arranging things, then Cass stepped out to let Taylor change into her PJs before Taylor let her borrow a T-shirt and some jogging shorts to sleep in. Soon enough both of them were laying down and staring at the ceiling.

“Man, I could really use another cookie,” Cass said.

They both started giggling into the darkness. “Do you think they’re Tinkertech?”

“Had to be,” Cass said. “Maybe that’s Dragon’s specialty. Tinkertech cooking. Her other stuff is from all the Tinkers she kidnaps and locks in her Canadian dungeon where she promises to feed them cake to keep them happy.”

Taylor nodded. “That makes perfect sense.” They both giggled a bit more, and Taylor shifted so that she could see over the edge of her bed. “Thanks,” she said.

“For what?”

Taylor had to think on it for a few seconds, but in the end honesty was easier. “For being a friend. You and Simmy and Levi.”

{Unit-02 Accepting Designation ‘Friend’ from Host-Queen_Administrator. Adding Exception to Genocide Protocols.}

[Joy! Preparing Creation of Friendship-Affirming Jewelry ‘Bracelet.’]

Cass snorted. “You’re such a dork, Tay.”

Taylor grinned as she shifted to stare up again.

“So,” Cass asked. “What’re we up to tomorrow?”

“I don’t know. I guess I’m supposed to go to school, but...”

“But it sounds lame as fuck after today?”

Taylor nodded. “Don’t swear. But yeah, pretty much. And school’s... not a nice place for me.”

“Oh.”

Taylor swallowed past the lump forming in her throat. “Yeah. I had a friend once, Emma. And she was great. But she, she turned on me. I don’t know what happened, but now she hates me, I think. And she goes to Winslow too, you know? She’s kinda the queen bitch.”

Cass made a grunting noise, then spoke up. “You should go.”

“What?”

“You should go,” she repeated. “Are you the same as you were two weeks ago?”

“No, not really.”

Taylor could almost hear the vicious grin in Cass’s voice. “Then go, and show them who they’re dealing with from now on. There can only be one Queen, Taylor, and I’m pretty sure that’s you.”

That night, Taylor fell asleep, her mind percolating on some very interesting ideas.

***

Tune in to the next Episode of How to Train Your Endbringer!

Taylor goes to school! Bullies are confused. Marshmallows! The school staff is confused. Friendship Bracelets! The PRT is confused. $18.47USD! Humans on Earth Bet are confused. Hentai! Humans on this Earth are Confused.


	21. Chapter 21

In Which Taylor Goes to School and People are Educated

Trying something new with this chapter. It’s made up of a lot of point-of-view snippets. It changes location fairly often. Just an experiment.

***

Taylor had woken up, taken a shower, and gotten dressed, all before Cass had so much as shifted from her spot on the floor. Right now, Taylor’s newest--human--friend was curled around a pillow in a rather compromising position while Taylor fiddled with her phone and tried to take a picture.

Having accomplished her task of obtaining weapons-grade blackmail material, Taylor stepped out of her room, went down the steps, and walked outside.

She paused at the doorway. Part of her wanted to turn right around and head back in. Instead, she firmed her resolve and pushed out onto the street. In no time at all, she was halfway to the school and was noticing a few other teens heading in the same direction.

“Guys, can you two be discreet for a bit?” she whispered while trying to keep her lips from moving too much.

[Can be Sneaky.]

{Unit-02 accepting Temporary Directive to Remain Concealed.}

Taylor nodded, then took in the other students she was seeing. Most of them, especially the girls, looked way different from usual. It took her a moment to realise it was the clothes. Most had skipped on the make-up, and instead of eye-catching clothes they were in jeans and sweaters and basically wore what Taylor usually wore. Clothing that was made for moving and working in a recovering city instead of clothes designed to strut around and look pretty.

It made her feel a little better, actually, to see that she wasn’t woefully underdressed. Still, she discreetly grabbed at her paunch of a tummy and shook it. “I could lose a few pounds,” she muttered.

[Sad. Cannot help. Unit-03 Requires no Fitness to be Pretty. Can Build Exercise Device? Mental-Reshaping to Discourage Consumption of Food?]

{Host-Queen_Administrator Wants Unit-02 to Prepare Selective Fat-Genocide Protocol?]

“Uh, no, I think I’ll just eat a bit less and maybe go for a run sometimes,” Taylor decided. She got a few looks for talking out loud and quickly hushed up. Then, before she really had time to register it, she was standing in front of Winslow High School.

Winslow was the same yet different. The building was the same halfway dilapidated mess, but a bit dirtier and rougher around the edges. Someone had taken the time to paint over gang signs but already there were marks appearing on top of fresh paint.

It was like someone had taken the Winslow that would be there in five years and shifted it back to the present day. All the damage that would have accumulated over years in a little over two weeks.

Still, she moved in, aware that there were more security guards than usual by the gates and that the student population had shrunk a fair bit. She was halfway down the main hall when her path was blocked by three familiar figures.

She had been looking down as she walked, old habits pushing her towards making herself as small and as unassuming as possible, so the first sight of Emma was a pair of pristine white running shoes.

She looked up slowly, her heart thumping wildly in her chest and her breathing coming in as short gasps. Emma was in the lead, Madison to her left and Sophia smirking to her right. Taylor's head swam.

“Well, well, look what the cat dragged in,” Emma said. There was amusement there, and anticipation.

Taylor froze. This was it, it was all going to start again as if nothing had changed as if--

{Unit-02 activate Targeted Genocide Protocols: Target: Teenaged Local Organisms?}

[Comforting. Can Mind-Rape?]

“No,” Taylor whispered.

Emma blinked at the response, then blinked again when Taylor stood taller and took in a deep breath. Then Taylor’s face shifted into a grin that showed off every tooth. She had friends, and even if Emma had been important to her, that was a long time ago.

“What are yo--” Emma began, then a fly slid down her throat and she started to cough violently. She doubled over, hands going to her throat as she sputtered for breath.

Taylor rushed forwards. “Emma, are you okay?” she asked.

Sophia, her face wearing its usual frown, stepped up to intercept Taylor. The track star’s foot landed in a puddle of water no one had seen and slipped from right under her. She landed on her bum with an undignified squawk.

Taylor ignored Sophia for the moment, focused as she was on Emma. “Are you okay? Do you want to go see the nurse?”

Emma shoved her away. “Leave me alone,” she croaked.

Stepping back, Taylor looked at her old friend, then she shared a confused glance with Madison. “Um, okay then. I’ll see you around!”

***

Cassandra was, to put it in a word, bored.

She’d woken up when Queenie, Taylor, had been getting ready but had fallen right back asleep. Now, maybe an hour and a bit later, she was fully awake and just... standing in Taylor’s room. She’d taken a shower, and gotten changed after picking through Taylor’s rather miserable wardrobe, but she didn’t know where to go from there.

Taylor was probably going to be back by four-ish, which left her about, oh, seven hours with nothing to do. She walked around the room for a bit, poking at the books and looking at the pictures collecting dust on the walls. Most of the latter had Taylor next to her dad and a pretty woman that had to be her mom.

She moved on, losing interest about as quickly as it took her to study each picture. Falling backwards onto Taylor’s bed, Cass was just about to take a nap when her eyes drifted to Taylor’s nightstand.

After a short and rather pointless battle against her curiosity, Cass rolled over and jimmied the stand’s drawer open, then pulled out the notebooks she’d seen Taylor stuff in there.

The cartoony Leviathan on the cover greeted her with its 'rawr' caption.  


She snorted and opened it. The majority of the book was completely blank, save for the first dozen pages that were filled with a neat and precise handwriting.

“Unit-02 claims to be able to control all liquids in his range. Test on different liquids. Do frozen liquids count? What’s the difference between a liquid that is frozen and a normal solid? Can he control glass? Non-newtonian liquids?” Cass whispered along.

She turned around, laying the notebook flat on the bed to read it more clearly.

“Unit-02 has macro-scale hydrokinesis. Claims to be able to still use micro-scale control at the same time. Test?” Cass blinked. Was that the cleaning tsunami? She snorted. Nah, Taylor wouldn’t do something like that. It was silly.

She skipped down a few lines.

“Unit-02’s range didn’t make sense. It’s non-variable. Asked for all future responses to be in metric-type units but still have answers that are hard to understand. Total liquid mass that he can control if measured as a volume of hypercompressed, atomically pure water is a long series of exponentials. That’s more water than there is on Earth (according to Google). If he covered the moon in an ocean, could I have my own private island?”

Cass felt her heart thumping in her chest, as if she was about to start a fight. She skipped a few lines of scientific jargon, then a few pages worth of it. The next section had a header. ‘How to make people like my friend.’ Next to the title was an image of a scaled-down Leviathan giving someone a hug.

“Based on Unit-02’s demonstrated ability to control the temperature of liquids, it might be possible to create forms of entertainment that would otherwise be impossible. Also, I want a snow castle. And he can make tentacles with his water. Note to self: Research tentacle-related-entertainment.”

Cass snapped the book closed, then placed it back in Taylor’s nightstand. She vowed not to talk about it. Ever.

***

Classes were classes. There were less students, and most of the daily events that used to bother her were absent--her usual seat,often covered in pencil shavings or spilled drinks, was so clean it almost sparkled--and the focus seemed more about passing the end of year tests instead of learning new things and doing group work. It was actually a nice change of pace.

No one bothered her all morning, though there were a lot of things preoccupying the other students. Madison had to go to the nurse’s office when she choked on a spit-ball-filled straw during World History, and Julia suffered a sudden and very embarrassing bout of hemorrhoids in the middle of computer classes, just as she was about to sit next to Taylor too.

And then the bell rang, classes were dismissed.

The start of lunch arrived.

Taylor was used to eating her lunches alone, off in some corner where nobody would bother her. Sometimes in the girl’s bathrooms on the second floor or something. But she'd kinda sorta forgotten something when packing up that morning.

“Guys,” she whispered. “I have no lunch!”

[Confusion. Host-Queen_Administrator requires immediate sustenance?]

{Unit-02 preparing Hunger-Genocide Protocols.}

Taylor paused on her way up a staircase. Fortunately, there wasn’t anyone nearby. “How would you kill hunger?”

{Unit-02 would remove Host-Queen_Administrator’s hunger-inducing organs. Replace with Superior liquid-only organs.}

Taylor blanched. “Let’s put that as plan... Z. Um, maybe you could grab me something to eat? Uh, unless you can’t. I can go without eating for a bit.”

[Unnecessary. Plan created to Obtain Sustenance for Host-Queen_Administrator. Proceed to ‘Rooftop’ for discreet ease of access.]

“Cool!” Taylor said and she sped up the stairs. She paused at the next landing. “You’re not stealing it, right?”

[... New Plan created to Obtain Sustenance for Host-Queen_Administrator!]

“Right,” Taylor said. She shook her head as she continued to make her way up.

***

Timothy was doing okay. Not excellent, not incredible, just okay. Yeah, he’d gotten another pat on the back for some quick thinking the day before. That was great.

Then the building exploded, which was less great.

Still, he got to escort Julia the receptionist out of the flaming PRT Headquarters and it earned him a peck on the cheek. That was nice, as far as rewards went.

Now though, he was manning the front desk of the office building serving as a temporary headquarters for the Brockton Bay PRT. It wasn’t as nice as the original headquarters, but it would do in a pinch.

He had heard, through the water-cooler grapevine, that they were bringing in some Tinkertech construction equipment to build a new headquarters and that it was only supposed to take a week or so. He didn’t really mind the new place, but it certainly didn’t have the same allure as the old HQ.

He was just thinking about lunch when the doors at the front of the lobby slammed open.

The troopers stationed on either side of the door spun around, containment foam sprayers already firing when a slip of cardboard and a plastic bag flew into the room. The two objects twisted around the twin sprays on con-foam and across the lobby to land right in between Timothy and his computer screen.

He stared at the cardboard for a few seconds before finally reading the message that seemed to be written using a tube of lipstick.

EMERGENCY!  
REQUIRE 18.47 USD FOR PURPOSE OF SAVING HUMANITY.  
REMOVE FROM BOUNTY OWED TO BEST FRIEND QUEEN ADMINISTRATOR.  
PLACE CURRENCY IN INCLUDED ‘NOT STOLEN’ PURSE.  
PLACE PURSE OUTSIDE.  
REJOICE IN CONTINUED EXISTENCE.  
-SIMURGH, THE

POSTSCRIPT: ‘THANK YOU’

Timothy sighed and reached into his pocket.

***

Joe Jr., from Joe’s Quickie Mart, was in a pretty good mood.

Things were finally looking up in the Bay. Sure, they had to beware of the Queen Administrator and her world-ending monster pets, but other than that things were pretty alright for the convenience-store owner.

Ever since she’d appeared in the Bay, he had only been robbed at gunpoint twice!

It was, right now, pretty quiet. That was going to change just as soon as the lunch rush started. He was just expecting his first lunch-hour customers when the door slammed opened and a few watery-tentacles tore into the store like something out of H.P. Lovecraft’s wet dreams. They slithered over the floors and ceilings, then whipped around and dropped a few items on the counter before all but one of them retracted.

Joe stared at the pile of food sitting in front of him, then up at the tentacle that promised to do things to him if he didn’t get moving.

Joe had watched those japanese cartoons once. He got moving, scanning items at a speed he would have thought impossible for himself not ten minutes ago. He chucked everything into a plastic bag, then watched as the tentacled loomed closer.

“Um, that’ll be 18.47? Please?

It dropped a few crumpled bills and some change on the counter, then retracted with the bag.

Joe still thought things were looking up.

***

In one timeline, Coil leaned back into his rather comfortable throne. Really, it was little more than an elaborate office chair, but from this chair came half the decisions that were shaping Brockton Bay’s underworld.

Things were going... well.

His early plans to take over the Bay had to be reshaped and re-evaluated as the leaders of every major gang were either dead or in PRT custody, but that was playing out in his favour now. Just about every gram of illicit material being moved into the city was doing so under his purview. He had cornered one of the most important markets and was now making inroads into others.

The remnants of the ABB still had their brothels and the E88 still pushed people into paying protection money, but they were losing ground. The less said about the Merchant’s remnants the better.

He actually had to start hiring a lot more men to fill the growing demand in the city. A few more moves would see him at the top of the food chain.

Or almost.

The Queen Administrator was still out there. He had tried to curtail her, to ambush her, to kill her or to get her to work for him and each attempt failed in a most spectacular fashion. Oh, she wasn’t unkillable. But the moment a bullet hit her, or she was teleported into Sundancer’s sun, Leviathan would lose all control and wipe the city from the maps. Everything with even the tiniest amount of liquid would burst apart. Humans, he had discovered, were made up of a fair amount of liquid.

So he had to play another game, one where he kept his assets out of her sight and made sure that most of his actions were, if not outright legal, then at least not terribly immoral.

A few more moves and he would be at the top, and if that position was subordinate to a partially insane girl then so be it. She was not a deterrent to his plans. If anything, she ensured that no one would have an easy time taking over the city.

Coil pushed himself back into a proper sitting position. He had work to do.

With a key-press the door to his office unlocked and, after a short delay, a rather rotund woman walk in. “Ah, hello Janice,” he greeted her. “A pleasure to see you.”

The simpering fool gave him a wooden smile. “I’m pleased to see you too, sir,” she said.

“Now, I’m afraid I’m a busy man, so let us skip the formalities and get straight to the meat of the matter. Tell me, how was your interview of Queen Administrator with Director Tagg?”

In another timeline, Thomas Calvert was hard at work in the temporary PRT headquarters, talking and ingratiating himself with the short-handed staff of the local PRT.

He was growing so close he could taste victory.

***

And you thought it was a Ziz-plot. Well, yeah, okay, it’s also a Ziz-plot, but you can have a plot inside another plot while plotting something else. Plotception. I’ll see myself out.

Next time, on How to Train your Endbringer!

Emma has a nice chat with her BFF Taylor. Taylor eats mini marshmallows.

Mucho Cred to Vhalidictes and eschwartz and ChaoticSky!


	22. Chapter 22

In Which Taylor Quits

Emma had skipped over lunch. It wasn’t so much that she wasn’t hungry, it was the opportunity that lunchtime presented. Taylor was, as usual, all alone. Not even an Endbringer attacking the city had managed to break the girl out of her shell.

She was, honestly, contemplating just giving up on Taylor. She wasn’t pushing back, she wasn’t challenging her anymore. It was just a dull repetition now. Really, if she wanted to vent there were others she could do it to, people more interesting than Taylor Hebert.

One of her many, many friends, Samantha or something, had seen Taylor heading towards the second floor, apparently muttering to herself the entire time.

This was, Emma thought, Taylor’s chance. Her chance to fight back, to get angry, to challenge her and not just... roll over and let herself be trampled on. She shook her head as she started making her way up the staircase that Taylor had taken.

“You think she’s in the bathroom again?” Madison asked. She was a little quieter than before. The whole Leviathan thing had wrecked her home and they had just moved back in a few days before. But Mads was a fighter, she would come out of it stronger.

“Fucking hope not. Swear they haven’t cleaned the shitters in weeks,” Sophia said.

Emma snorted. She took a few deep breaths and tried to hide the way running up the stairs had left her winded. Maybe it was a good thing she was skipping lunch after all. Searching, she spotted Taylor climbing up another staircase a little ways down the corridor. “C’mon,” she told her friends.

The roof access door was still ajar when they got to it. “Think she jumped?” Emma joked. It wasn’t that funny. She wanted Taylor to fight back. Just dying like that would be so terribly lame of her.

Taylor was standing at the far end of the roof only a few feet away from a rusty guardrail that would do little to prevent a long fall. She took in the three girls that slid past the doorway. “Aww, Taylor, are you all alone again?” Emma asked.

Taylor smiled right back. “For now, I guess.”

“You’re all smiles, aren’t you?” Emma said. She expected the smile to drop, for Taylor to pull into herself.

Instead, Taylor giggled into an open palm. “I guess I am.”

Emma looked at the girl that used to be her friend, her sister in all but name, and shook her head sadly. “You’re a real mess, Tay,” she said, using an old nickname. There was something like bittersweet nostalgia churning in her chest. “What are you doing up here? Trying to convince yourself to jump? Need a hand?”

Taylor blinked, her smile turning wry. “I don’t think jumping would do anything, actually,” she said. “Nah, I’m waiting for my lunch. A friend is supposed to deliver it.”

Emma snorted. “What kind of loser did you convince to hang out with you?”

Madison crossed her arms and Emma knew she was going to say something rather biting. Mads was good for that kind of banter. “I wonder what kind of fat loser would actually want to spen--” Madison froze, her voice leaving her with a squeak that had both Emma and Sophia turning her way.

There was a hand on Madison’s shoulder. Long and white, with slender fingers that were gripping the much smaller teenager. Emma followed along the arm and up to the smiling face of the Simurgh.

Madison’s eyes bugged out and she started to shake. Emma couldn’t blame her. Her blood ran cold as she took in the Endbringer who let go of Madison, letting her fall to her knees. The Endbringer ran a hand along her belly, as if checking her waistline, a gesture Emma had done countless times while in front of a mirror. She looked back down at Madison then tilted her head to one side as if asked a question.

It clicked.

Taylor was smiling a lot. Taylor was giggling and acting like a kid. Taylor was just a little bit off. Taylor was waiting for the Simurgh. Taylor was Queen Administrator.

“Uh, she really didn’t like it when you called her fat,” Taylor, Queen Administrator, said. “Also, she says that she doesn’t lose.”

“I, I didn’t mean it!” Madison screamed. “Yo-you’re not fat. Please don’t kill me.”

Emma wanted to chastise Mads for being such a coward but her knees were shaking too much and her breathing was off like she’d just run a marathon and then got kicked in the ribs.

“Simmy,” Taylor’s voice from behind her said. “What are you wearing?”

The words helped, they were something she could focus on. Emma looked at the Simurgh, really looked and took in the way she was dressed. A pleated skirt and a white blouse with a sailor collar and bright blue necktie. It was a Japanese school uniform and the Simurgh was really pulling it off and Emma had to shake her head to remember that she was supposed to be terrified and not ogling the Endbringer.

“Okay,” Taylor said. “But why are you dressed that way?” Emma turned towards Taylor only to see her tilt her head to the side in the same way she used to when they were smaller and Annette had to explain something complicated. “Oh, but I’m the one in school, not you,” she pointed out. It was as if she was having a conversation where Emma could only hear one side.

Taylor’s face scrunched up, and she shook her head before giving the Endbringer a wry smile. “Sure, why not. Where’d you even learn about that kind of outfit?” Her eyebrows scrunched together. “What’s a ‘hen-tay?’”

“What the fuck?!” Sophia yelled.

Taylor’s good mood seemed to vanish for a second before her smile returned. “What’s wrong, Sophia?”

Soph wasn’t taking this well. Emma could see it in the way her friend’s eyes twitched and the way she was standing in a lower stance, as if ready to pounce at any moment. “You can’t be, you’re just prey!”

Taylor took a half step back, then a wave of confusion crossed over her features. “Um, well, yeah? I guess. I’m not much of a fighter, if that’s what you mean. If someone tried to hunt me I think Simmy and Levi might have something to say. Well, actually they can’t talk so it’d mostly be head-explodey noises.” She made a gesture and Emma felt bile rise.

It was sinking in, just how badly they’d fucked up. They were on the roof, alone, with Taylor who they had treated like shit and the goddamned Simurgh. If Taylor wanted them disappeared then that was it.

Sophia’s fists were shaking by her side, and for the tiniest moment, Emma thought she was going to swing at Taylor. Then the roof shook as a claw the size of her torso grabbed the edge, tore through the guardrail and pulled. Leviathan’s four-eyed face peeked over the edge.

“Levi, no!” Taylor said as she started waving her arms around wildly. “You’ll destroy the school.” She paused, her arms stopping mid wave. Emma knew that blank look, she was thinking. “Hrm, that might not be so bad,” she said under her breath.

Leviathan’s other hand rose and in its centre was a bag. He moved it towards Taylor as if it was an offering and she squealed as she took it from the monster’s claws. “My lunch!”

Sophia had gone deathly pale and she was backing away towards the door.

Madison, meanwhile, looked as though she couldn’t decide which Endbringer to look at. She was shivering, half-crouched in an almost fetal position with a growing stain down the front of her pants. She whimpered before turning on a heel and rushing for the door. Sophia followed soon after.

Emma stayed. She couldn’t leave. That would be cowardly, that would be surrendering, and Emma didn’t do that, not anymore.

Taylor looked up as the other two ran, then shook her head. She wore the same smile as she returned to the centre of the roof and sat cross-legged on the floor. “Wanna join me, Ems?” She gestured across from her. There was no guile in her eyes, no maliciousness.

Emma licked her lips. “I,” she began.

Taylor shrugged. “That’s okay. You can stand, if you want. Or leave. Though, I’d really like to talk to you for a bit.” She opened the bag Leviathan had given her and pulled out a bottle of water and placed it next to her knee. Then she took out a pre-made salad in a plastic container and hummed as if to herself.

"You know, Emma, I loved you. You were my sister. But now..." Taylor paused long enough for the wind around them to settle. When Emma looked up it was to see the Simurgh floating above Taylor's shoulder like an angel coming down from on high to reap what had been sown. "Now, I think we have a lot of catching up to do, don't we?" She reached into the bag and took out another bottle of water.

One eyebrow raised, Taylor compared the two bottles, both from different brands before setting them next to herself. The next thing out of the bag was a bag of mini marshmallows that she just looked at in confusion before placing next to the salad. “You’re not saying much,” Taylor said. She reached into the bag and a third bottle fell out. She placed it next to the others, revealing that it was yet another brand. “That’s okay. I can talk for both of us.” She popped the lid from one of them and gulped it down.

Taylor’s encouraging smile had a shiver running down Emma’s spine. She watched, unmoving, as Taylor opened the salad, mixed in the dressing, then started chewing on it with a plastic fork.

Despite herself, Emma started to relax--if Taylor was going to kill her she would have done it already, right? Or maybe, a small part of her mind said, she was just toying with her. Emma had done the same hundreds of times, hadn’t she?

Taylor leaned in, finished chewing her mouthful of lettuce, then spoke, "Hey Emma, remember when we were little? How we used to play all those games? Do you remember how much I loved to be the silly hero?" In a distantly terrifying way, it reminded her of old times. Taylor babbling on like her mouth had no breaks.

She watched Taylor finish her salad. It took a minute, maybe two, but soon enough Taylor was done. Turning the bag upside down, Taylor shook it and watched as a single unwrapped sausage fell onto the rooftop. The wind rustled by them, playing with the Simurgh’s feathers in a way that sounded, faintly, like laughter.

Taylor rolled her eyes as she stood up and placed one of the bottles in a pocket of her jeans. The salad bowl she tossed into the plastic bag. Taylor took the last bottle, the cheap off-brand one and pushed it into Emma’s hand.

She grabbed it without really thinking.

When she looked up from the bottle it was to find Taylor’s hand on her shoulder.

The goofy grin was gone, leaving something fierce and dark in its place, her hand tightening on the redhead's shoulder. "Well now I’m playing a new game. Just like old times, you get to be the one who knows all my secrets. Of course, this time... no one will believe you."

Taylor winked at Emma and walked by.

Emma opened her mouth to reply. Nothing came out. Her mouth closed, something cold curling in her stomach as the truth set in.

It was an act, Emma realised. It was all an act.

She started shivering.

***

Taylor popped a mini-marshmallow into her mouth and chewed on it. The corridors were, for the most part, empty. That was okay. It gave her less things to distract her while she was thinking. She ate another marshmallow.

Taylor was thinking about school, about having to come back here every day even though she really didn’t want to. “Hey guys, could you homeschool me?”

{Unit-02 is Aware of Local Organisms’ rudimentary ‘Sciences’.}

[Affirmative! Will acquire Sexy Teacher Cosplay.]

Taylor sighed. “I don’t think that’s necessary.”

[Host-Queen_Administrator is Definable as ‘No Fun.’]

She snorted and popped another marshmallow into her mouth. That was good enough for her, she supposed. Turning at the next intersection, Taylor made for the Principal’s office. She was going to have a chat with Blackwell. Then, she was going to... Taylor thought about it for a moment. What was she going to do?

[Have fun?] the Simurgh suggested.

She shrugged. That sounded about right. The office was just as she’d last seen it, which was unfortunate because she hadn’t liked it much last time. The woman at the front desk looked up from whatever she was working on and gave Taylor a disinterested look. “Can I help you?”

“Yup. I need to talk to Blackwell.”

The secretary sighed. “Is it important?”

Taylor nodded, then noticed that the woman wasn’t paying attention. “Yes, yes it is. Very important.”

“Fine, take a seat, I’ll go inform her Miss...”

“Hebert.”

The secretary nodded, then went back to typing. Taylor stood for a few more seconds, then found one of those old plastic chairs to sit on. It was as uncomfortable as it looked. Worse, she couldn’t talk to her friends without looking crazy.

At least it gave her some time to think. Mostly, she wanted to know what to do next. If she wasn’t going to continue to attend classes at Winslow then she’d have a lot of free time on her hands. And, given the skills that her friends had, it wouldn’t be hard for her to do... anything, really. She ate another marshmallow.

Maybe she could go on to Arcadia. Or just skip all that and go right on to college? That felt like a nice idea, but she’d still have to wait for the world to get used to her some more first. What could she do in the meantime that would be ‘fun?’

Taylor leaned back, the cheap chair creaking. When she was young she had wanted to be a hero. When she got older and Emma left her, she wanted the heroes to do something to help her. How many others were in the same position? How many could use a hand?

Taylor nodded to herself. Now she just needed to plan a bit more.

“Miss Herbert, Principal Blackwell is ready to see you now.”

“Hebert,” Taylor corrected automatically. She stood, ignoring the secretary who ignored her back and made her way into Blackwell’s office.

Blackwell herself was sitting behind her desk, a huge thing made of pressed wood and laminate that was peeling at the corners. Papers were stacked across the desk, some of them in piles that might have been defying physics to stay in place.

“Miss Hebert,” Blackwell began. She eyed Taylor like someone would a rabid raccoon.

“Hello Miss Blackwell,” Taylor said. “I, uh, just wanted to tell you that I quit.”

The principal blinked at that. “Miss Hebert, you can’t just... quit school.”

Taylor tilted her head to one side. She couldn’t? “I can’t?” She pulled out her sack of mini marshmallows and, ignoring Blackwell’s look of incredulity, popped one into her mouth.

“Of course not,” the principal said. She reached over and moved one of the stacks away from the edge of the table and Taylor noticed the PRT logo on the header. “You have to attend a school or you’ll find yourself in trouble with truancy officers.”

“Hmm,” Taylor said. “Okay then, I’ll be homeschooled.”

“That, that won’t work either,” Blackwell said. She was starting to sweat and fidget in her seat. Taylor quirked an eyebrow at the reply, but also at the reluctance in the principal’s stance. The woman had never been helpful for Taylor, and this seemed like more of the same. “Look, Miss Hebert, if you’re having any trouble in classes, or with any students, please tell me and I will do my utmost to take care of it.”

Now Taylor knew something was up. “Okay, I guess that’s helpful, but I’d still rather go. Is there a reason you want me to stay?” The last wasn’t so much directed at the woman before her than at her friends who were waiting outside.

[Can explain! Organic ‘Blackwell’ being Influenced by Organization ‘PRT’ to Imprison Host-Queen_Administrator during School Operating hours.]

“Miss Hebert, you’re an important student to this school.” Blackwell swallowed. “What would it take to keep you here, Miss Hebert?”

“Hrm,” Taylor said. Of course Blackwell hadn’t turned a new leaf. She just wanted the PRT on her side for whatever reason. It didn’t change much in the end. “Well, I’d want to have my own bathroom,” she said.

“That can be done,” the principal replied quickly.

Taylor’s dad had taught her a thing or two about negotiations. When a person capitulated quickly, it just meant that they were willing to give more. “And I want my own classroom. And that the teachers come to me instead.”

“I... I’m certain I could arrange that, if it would make you more comfortable.”

Taylor nodded. It really would. “Oh, and I want one of the wings to be mine.”

“A wing?”

Taylor gestured, trying to make a box in the air and mostly succeeding. “You know, a section of a building. Winslow has two wings.”

“I, yes, I know what a wing is,” she said. The principal weighed what Taylor had asked for, then nodded slowly. “We... could do that.”

Taylor grinned. “I want three.”

“Three what?”

“Wings,” she explained.

“But Winslow only has two,” Blackwell said. She was starting to sweat a lot, her suit sticking to her in ways that couldn’t have been comfortable.

Taylor hummed. “Okay, I’ll settle for one, but it has to be really big so that my friends can come. I don’t think the Simurgh ever went to school and she really wants to.”

“The, the Simurgh?” Now Blackwell sounded a little faint. Taylor almost felt bad when she pointed out towards the window behind the principal. Slowly, as if taking her time would make it not happen, Blackwell turned around and looked outside. Her office had a nice view of the parking lot next to the school.

Leaning against a car even though it only reached her mid-thigh, was the Simurgh in her school uniform. She was chewing on a wad of bubble gum, arms crossed over her chest and looking pretty cool, in a rebellious Endbringer-teen sort of way. At least, that’s how Taylor saw it.

Blackwell started breathing in and out a lot faster than normal. “You want her to attend Winslow?”

“Actually, I think she could probably make it to a better school, like Arcadia, or Immaculata.... Do they only accept Christian students? I don’t know if Ziz is big on religion.” Taylor shrugged. Another question to ask. “Anyway, I’m not really that interested in staying. Sorry.”

She got up, then froze. “Um, do you have a trash can?”

“A what?” Blackwell said. She seemed to be shaking.

“A can, for trash.” Taylor wobbled her empty bag in front of Blackwell. She was out of mini marshmallows.

Blackwell seemed to come out of her stupor, even if just a little, and pulled a trash can out from under her desk. Taylor smiled in thanks and tossed the bag in. “Cool, so I guess I’ll see you around,” she said before making her way out of the office.

“What will you do now?” Blackwell asked.

It was a strange question, Taylor decided. It was pretty much none of her business what Taylor did from now on. In fact, Taylor was completely out of her hair. Still, answering didn’t hurt anyone, and it would probably end up in the ears of the PRT before the hour was up. “I’m going to be a hero.”

***  
Next time, on How to Train Your Endbringer!

Taylor does books. Vista does Taylor.

Mucho Cred to Vhalidictes and eschwartz and js_za and ChaoticSky!


	23. Chapter 23

In Which Taylor Exposes Herself and Does Books

Taylor felt like skipping as she walked out of the front doors of Winslow. After pondering it for a few seconds, she gave in to the urge and started skipping past the school, a giggle escaping her at the weird looks she was receiving.

At that moment, she couldn’t care any less about what people thought of her. She was free. Yeah, sure, she could have toughed it out, or stayed in there to try and fight back, but it was just not worth it. She was sure her friends would be better teachers, and her dad would understand if she explained it right.

No, Taylor had much better things to do than stay in school. She was going to be a hero.

But first she had to visit the library.

Arriving at the corner nearest the school where a bus stop stood empty, Taylor flopped down on the dirty bench and bent her head back until she spotted a white shape floating high above. Leviathan was nearby too, she could tell, but he was being all sneaky-like and keeping out of sight.

“So, I need to get to the library,” she said.

{Unit-02 can provide Transportation.}

[Flying!]

Taylor snorted. “I think I flew with you last time, Simmy, how about I go with Leviathan this time? Plus, we’re really not in a hurry.”

[Incentive. Have Gift for Host-Queen_Administrator.]

“Are you trying to bribe me?” Taylor asked, a note of incredulity in her voice.

[Affirmative!] her angel-like friend said as she dove out of the sky and came to a hovering stop before the bus stop. The Endbringer reached into the folds of her pleated skirt and Taylor was amazed when she noticed that the skirt had pockets. It must have been some sort of Tinkertech, the kind that normal people couldn’t reproduce, otherwise all skirts would have pockets. [Excited. Have created Friendship-Affirming Bracelets!]

The Simurgh came to a rest before Taylor, her hands outstretched to reveal three bracelets. Two of them were way too big for Taylor. All of them were made of bands of some shiny metal interwoven like a twisting cord. They looked almost like double helixes, but twisted in on themselves with hundreds of tiny swirls and designs carved into the spaces between links. Every inch or so there was a bead made of a different material.

Taylor picked the smallest of the three and weighed it in her hands. It was actually pretty heavy, but it felt solid and tough. “It’s pretty,” she said.

[Joy! Host-Queen_Administrator should Wear. Activate Bracelet.]

Taylor slid the bracelet onto her left wrist, then started turning it around. All the beads were white; one of them looked like a bit of marble, another a diamond the size of her thumb knuckle with a hole bored through it, and yet another was a bit of albino coral. It should have been uncomfortable with all the bits sticking out, but it was actually a nice, if tight, fit. “How do I activate it?”

[Instructional. Turn bead.] Simmy placed one of the bracelets on her own hand, then spun one of the beads around.

A burst of brilliant white light flashed out and a beam shot into the sky. The Simurgh spun around in a tight circle in mid-air, her legs spread in a wide stance and her free hand going to her forehead with a V-is-for-victory sign. A few bursts of light flashed across her bust, hips and legs.

When the light dispersed, the Simurgh was dressed in a very short skirt and a similar sailor blouse, but it now had a huge white bow on the front and her hair was done in twin tails that reached down to her waist. [Sailor Simurgh! Chaos Powers Activated!]

Taylor was slack-jawed.

[Preen. Is Awesome.]

“Uhh,” Taylor said. She looked down at her own bracelet. “Mine does the same thing?” she asked with a fair amount of apprehension.

[Affirmative. Diamond is Sailor Administrator Costume. Marble is Boring Queen Administrator Costume.]

Taylor looked at the bracelet, then at the third bead. What was the coral supposed to be then? With a bit of curiosity, she flipped the bead around.

She had been expecting a bright burst of light or something. She was not expecting to feel a warm breeze across parts of her body that were not supposed to be feeling any breeze, warm or otherwise.

She looked down.

She was naked.

With a speed that surprised even her, she flipped the marble bead around and almost giggled with embarrassed relief when her Queen Administrator costume weighed down her shoulders. “Oh thank god,” she said. There didn’t seem to be anyone looking at her on the street, or at least no one that could see her in the relative privacy of the bus shelter. “Why didn’t you tell me the other one was empty?”

[Didn’t ask. Room for Future Costume.]

Glaring at her winged friend, Taylor adjusted her robes and tried not to think bad thoughts about the Simurgh, especially since the Endbringer in question was grinning at her. “Thanks for the bracelet, it’s really pretty,” she said. “Now c’mon, we need to get to the library. I’ve a bunch of things to look up!”

Hopefully her face wouldn’t be on fire by the time they got there.

***

They really, really, probably, shouldn’t have been sent over to the library. In fact, Missy was super certain that sending the Wards to ‘discuss inappropriate public behaviour’ was either overkill or, in this case, really dumb.

But, she was just a little girl in the eyes of her superiors, and with Piggot a little under the weather, it somehow fell on her shoulders to rein in the Queen Administrator as she terrorized and assaulted... books, apparently.

Really, she huffed to herself, what was the girl hurting by visiting the library? It was a public place, probably during opening hours, and nobody actually spent time there. As far as Missy was concerned they should have been happy that she was there and not ruining another park or cleaning the streets again.

Of course, they didn’t send her alone. Oh no, that would have been too easy. They sent her with backup in the form of the most inexperienced Ward on the whole team.

The van they were in bounced over a few potholes and finally came to a rumbling stop. “Alright, you’ve both read your briefing?” the trooper at the front of the van asked them.

Vista nodded sharply. It wouldn’t do for the troopers to start treating her like a kid, so she always did her best to act mature around them. Browbeat was a little slower on the uptake. “Uh, yeah,” he said.

“Alright,” the trooper said. “The target is in the Washington Memorial Library. She was last seen on the second floor. We have had no visual confirmation on the location of the Simurgh, but the Leviathan is unmoving in front of the library. Remember, this is not a policing action. You are not to antagonize, threaten to arrest, or otherwise get into conflict with Queen Administrator. This is a meet and greet only, and as secondary objective, we want you to politely ask her to move her Endbringers away from the library.”

Vista didn’t roll her eyes because that would have been unprofessional. “Understood,” she said, then poked Browbeat in the shoulder while gesturing at the door with a shake of her head. “We’ll keep in contact,” she said.

The door slid aside and the two Wards hopped out. They were being dropped just around the corner from the library, out of sight from any windows that might have allowed Queen Administrator to see them.

That was, if the Simurgh didn’t see them coming.

Vista took the lead, Browbeat following on her heels. “So, uh, what do you, um, think is going to happen?” Browbeat said.

“I think,” she began, “That we’re either going to meet her, talk a bit, then be dismissed, or something really weird is going to happen and we’re both going to end up in Master-Stranger quarantine for the rest of our lives.”

“Really?”

Vista didn’t roll her eyes because that would have been rude. “No.”

They came around the corner with only a bit of help from Vista’s power and saw the library building. It was a nice enough bit of architecture, located on a bit of a hill between a fire station and a fancy apartment block. The building was three stories tall, with glass walls stretching all the way up from the bottom and allowing them a good view of the dozens of shelves filled with books within.

The architecture was nice, but it wasn’t nearly as attention-grabbing as Leviathan. The Endbringer was lounging across the front of the building, using its front steps as a headrest while the rest of his body was sprawled out across the lawn. His tail was thumping against the ground with a constant boom-boom sound that shook the entire neighbourhood.

Vista swallowed and waited just out of Leviathan’s range. He didn’t seem concerned about her. The opposite was not true.

“Okay, we can do this,” she said mostly to herself. She felt, rather than heard, Browbeat standing closer.

With a bit of a twist, Vista scampered past the Endbringer and found herself standing right at the entrance of the library, her partner for the afternoon right next to her.

The booming thump paused for a second, then it resumed with the same slow cadence.

Exhaling, Vista opened the doors and slid into the main lobby area of the library. The entire place was well lit thanks to the huge windows allowing sunlight to stream in, and the air around them held the faintly musky scent of bound paper.

Vista looked around, but it was pretty clear that Queen Administrator wasn’t on the first floor. After a bit of searching, it was also pretty clear that she wasn’t on the second floor either.

They finally found her on the third floor, standing next to a long table covered in books. They weren’t simple books either, but huge tomes with old leather bindings that looked like they weighed a ton. A few were opened up before Queen Administrator and she was bent over them, reading the fine print while murmuring to herself.

They must have made a noise because the cape looked up from her books, then pointed a finger right at Vista. “Vista, from the Wards!” she said.

Vista tried a welcoming smile. “That’s me,” she said. “And this is Browbeat, also from the Wards. He’s new.”

“Brilliant!” Queen Administrator stabbed a finger at the opened book before her. “Vista, would your power allow you to transport stuff across state borders with more ease than a normal person?”

The youngest cape in the room froze at the question but answered anyway. “Um, yeah?”

“Did you send a letter to the secretary of commerce about that?”

“No?”

Queen Administrator’s eyes narrowed. “115 U.S.C. §§330a states: Any person or persons having the ability to transport large quantities of fish across state borders must, within 48 hours of developing the ability, contact the secretary of commerce by letter to inform them of such.” Queen Administrator stood taller. “Vista, I’m afraid I’m going to have to place you under citizen’s arrest for the act of potential fish smuggling.”

Vista felt her heart sinking. They were right, they were right all along. She was crazy.

***

Taylor tried to keep in the giggles, but the look of slowly dawning horror on Vista’s face cracked her up too much and she started to laugh. When Vista looked confused instead of horrified it only made it all the worse. “I’m sorry,” she said between fits of giggling. “You should have seen your face.”

Vista huffed and stood as tall as she could, almost as if she wanted to look bigger than she was. It was, frankly, adorable, but Taylor chose not to comment on it. “W-well, you shouldn’t have done that,” she said.

Taylor nodded. “I shouldn’t have,” she agreed. “So, how can I help two fine Wards of the government?”

Vista’s shoulders slumped. “Ah, we were sent to ask you what you were doing,” she said.

“Oh, that’s an easy one,” Taylor replied. “I’m looking up a few things. I wanted to do the whole heroing thing, but I’m not sure what’s legal or not. So I came here.” She lifted one of the heavy books, then let it thump back down. “Honestly, it’s been more trouble than I thought.”

“Oh,” Vista said. “Yeah, I can imagine. The Protectorate has a whole legal team that makes sure that everything we do is okay. It can get really bothersome sometimes.” The Ward shrugged. “Honestly, most independents or new heroes just... go out and do whatever. There are a bunch of laws that make it hard to pin anything on someone wearing a costume.”

“That sounds kinda counter-intuitive. What’s to stop just anyone from picking up a mask and doing whatever?”

Vista nodded, as if she’d expected the question or at least had heard it before. “Capes. If you try to stop a crime in costume, there are good chances that you’ll attract the attention of a cape. That’s not a problem if you’re one too, but if you’re just a normal person, then you might not be ready or able to fight a cape.”

“Makes sense, but that’s not the case here. I’m pretty sure I’m a cape. So what would happen if I try to do the hero thing and accidentally, I dunno, smuggle fish across state lines?”

Vista cracked a smile. “Usually, if it’s something small, or done while defending yourself or others, the PRT would look the other way. If it’s not, well, that’s why the Protectorate and PRT exist.”

“Cool,” Taylor said. She was grinning as she slid the cover of one lawbook closed, then placed it atop another. “So, I know you’re just here to make sure I wasn’t doing anything illegal, like fish smuggling, but I’d feel pretty bad if I just left you behind. Wanna come with me?”

“Um, where are you going?” Vista asked. She seemed uncertain, and a lot smaller.

“Oh, I’m going out heroing.”

Somehow that didn’t make Vista look any more confident.

***  
Next time, on How to Train Your Endbringer!

Missy discovers that things are always as they seem. Taylor decides that crime is bad.

Mucho Credits to Vhalidictes and eschwartz and js_za and ChaoticSky!

A/N: I think I’ll be slowing down my posting rate for a bit, down from 3 chapters a week to one every Monday and Friday. My ultimate goal with this story wasn’t to complete it, so much as to reach 100K. Also, I’ve been thinking of maybe, perhaps, starting a Patreon. Not sure if it’s a good idea or not, but it might get me some coin that I can spend on vidya games which I’ll play instead of writing... actually, that sounds like a horrible idea.


	24. Chapter 24

In Which Taylor gets Mugged

This was, Vista realized, a disaster.

She was running down the stairs and blatantly cheating with her power to keep up with Queen Administrator who was flouncing towards the library’s exit. Browbeat was hot on her heels the entire time.

“Q-Queen Administrator, wait!” she called after the would-be heroine.

Much to her surprise, the cape stopped by the doorway and blinked back at Vista. She looked like nothing more than a puppy that had heard its name. A puppy with a WMD. “What’s up?”

“I, you’re just going to go out, like that?” Vista asked.

Queen Administrator looked down at her costume. She pinched the front of her robes, then let it fall back. “I mean, it’s not super practical, I know, but it’s not that bad, is it?”

“Not your costume,” Vista rushed to reply. “I mean, you’re going to go out and try to do... something without backup, or without any experience? What if you do something wrong and someone gets hurt?”

That gave the cape pause and Vista felt herself calming down. The report--at least, the very limited, super-censored version that the Wards got--said that Queen Administrator was actually kind of reasonable if you talked to her. She was really hoping that the cape was going to be reasonable now. “Okay, you’re probably right. And I shouldn’t do cape-y stuff without telling my dad. Or inviting some of my friends along.”

Vista almost shuddered with relief. “Exactly.”

“So, how about you tell me all about it. You’ve been one of the Wards since, like, forever, right?”

After the wild emotional swings she’d just been through, finding out that Queen Administrator was something of a fan was hardly a blip on the radar. “Yeah. I can tell you about anything, really. Well, not anything-anything, but about Wards stuff, if you want.”

Queen Administrator nodded excitedly. “Brilliant. Tell you what, there’s a little ice cream shop just, like, two blocks down. We can go see if they’re reopened and talk along the way. How does that sound?”

Vista had to fight to keep in the giggles of relief. “That sounds great.”

Turning on the balls of her feet, Queen Administrator led the way outside and to the front lawn of the library where Leviathan was still lounging. The Endbringer looked more like a hyper-detailed statue than a city-destroying machine. The only giveaway was the slow thump-thump of his tail.

Vista was still a little--read: a lot--wary of the Endbringer, but Queen Administrator showed no such concern as she hopped onto his side and stood on what would be the ribs of a normal creature. “Hey, Unit Two, Vista and I are going to head out for ice cream, did you want me to bring you something?” she asked the Endbringer.

Leviathan didn’t squeak or even so much as move any more than before, but Queen Administrator nodded all the same. “Cool. I’ll grab a sundae or something then.” With that cryptic and ominous declaration made, she jumped off the Endbringer’s side.

Vista almost squeaked, expecting the girl to come to an untimely demise or at least hurt herself in the fall, but quicker than she could really register, Leviathan caught his mistress by the scruff of her costume and lowered her down gently. She kept on walking as if she hadn’t narrowly avoided a fall. “Are you coming?” she shouted back.

With some creative warping of space around the Endbringer, Vista followed after the obviously insane cape. “So, he’s just going to stay there?” she asked.

“I guess. He can’t exactly fit in some of the smaller streets, what with the wires and all. And, uh, when he does the roof hopping thing it usually ends with him going through the buildings, so that’s a no.”

Vista shook her head to clear the mental image of Leviathan, stuck up to his armpits in an apartment complex. She couldn’t afford to giggle. She was representing the PRT and Wards; she had to be professional. “You wanted to ask about hero stuff?” she prompted the older girl back onto a safe line of discussion.

“Yes! Okay. Okay, so, I know that you’re a hero because of all the merchandise and the costume and all that, but that stuff’s all just... fluff, you know? What do you guys actually do that’s heroic? Like, I know Amy heals people all the time, but we don’t all have powers that are that cool. So her sister Vicky goes around stopping robberies and things like that.”

Vista hummed in thought when Queen Administrator finally paused for breath. They were past the library now, and had actually just walked past the unmarked PRT van that had dropped them off. Vista was walking on the street-side of the sidewalk, amusing herself by stepping on the very edge of the path while balancing carefully not to fall into the street. She was, of course, cheating the entire time. “It’s not fun, at first. There’s a lot of PR stuff, and we have to shake babies and kiss hands and all that,” she said.

Queen Administrator snorted at the lame joke. “But it’s not like that all the time, is it?”

Vista shook her head and refocused. “No, we get a lot of training. How to take someone down without hurting anyone, how to use your power more effectively and all sorts of teamwork drills. Mostly it’s about preparing us to be members of the Protectorate. If anything, they’re the real heroes and we’re just... sidekicks, at best.”

They came around a corner onto a street bisected by a few alleyways. At the end of the street it shifted from residential to commercial. She actually recognized the area from her patrols. “We still get to do things. I’ve been in fights against some nasty people, like Hookwolf. And just a bit ago we got to try and stop a bank robbery. That was kind of awesome.”

Missy was about to go on, to tell Queen Administrator that they really did want to make a difference, when there was a sudden scuffle off to her side.

She turned, only to see the cape she’d been talking to be pulled into the dark recesses of an alley.

Queen Administrator was pinned to one dirty wall, a man standing before her in a dirty jacket and dirty pants, a handgun in his off-hand pointed right at the cape’s face. “Give-- give me all your money!” he yelled.

Vista froze. She had seen muggings before, she’d done patrols in the worse parts of town and had seen that same sort of desperate person. Still, they usually had the sense not to try and attack a cape. Her mind ran through the possibilities even as she spun around and waited for an opportunity to jump in and shove the man away.

“Are you robbing me?” Queen Administrator asked. She sounded genuinely confused.

What would happen if he shot her, or if the cape died? Would the Endbringers rampage? Both of them? Vista had friends here, her family lived here. Would they survive two Endbringers hitting the Bay at once? And what of Queen Administrator herself? As far as Vista had seen she was a nice if flighty girl who didn’t deserve anything bad happening to her.

“Y-yeah, I’m doing that,” the man said. Spittle flew out with every word and Queen Administrator turned her face away. “Gimme your money!”

The cape turned to face him, her brows scrunched in a glare under her hood. “No. You’re being very rude.”

The mugger blinked stupidly at the statement and his arm moved to the side.

Vista jumped. She warped what little space was between Queen Administrator and the mugger until he was facing an empty wall next to her, then ran, her power cutting the distance to nothing.

Her shoulder caught him right in the ribs while her off hand wrapped around his wrist and yanked it up and away. While he reeled back, she brought her elbow up and caught him in the gut hard enough that he exhaled with a violent cough.

As the mugger fell, Vista warped around to behind him, brought his arm up to the middle of his back, and yanked. His hand spasmed open, dropping the handgun on the ground with a clatter.

She kicked it away before hitting him in the back of one knee hard enough that he collapsed face-first into the alley ground. “You, are under arrest,” she hissed while pulling out zip-ties from a back pocket.

“That was awesome!”

Missy spun to find Queen Administrator clapping, a wide grin on her face. “You were like, kapah, and pow, and bam, and he was like ‘no,’ then you were like, ‘yeah’ and the gun went flying and he couldn’t stop you cause you’re totally awesome.” Queen Administrator babbled while gesturing with vague karate-like motions that Vista was completely certain she hadn't made.

“Um, thanks,” Vista said. “Just doing my job?”

The cape nodded, her smile not fading an inch. “You were super cool,” she declared.

“Ah, well,” Vista replied. She looked down to hide the bit of a blush creeping up her cheeks. “Anyway, we need to call this in.” She pressed a finger to the side of her visor and started relaying the details to an attentive console. It only took a few seconds to have them call the police for her.

Queen Administrator studied her the whole time, and there was a spark of something mischievous in her eyes that worried Missy.

“That’s it,” she said as she removed her finger. “We just have to wait a few minutes and they’ll pick him up.” She poked at the man’s back, stopping his rambling swearing for a few breaths before he resumed.

Everyone ignored him. “That was really well done,” Queen Administrator said. “We should go out and find other muggers.”

“Uh, maybe after the police arrive?” Vista tried to stall. “Weren’t you afraid? He had you at gunpoint.”

Queen Administrator shrugged. “Not really. Shooting me would have hurt, so my friends would stop him before he did it.”

“Your... friends?” Vista asked. She knew what Queen Administrator was talking about, but the idea just felt off. The man wouldn’t shoot her because her Endbringers were supposed to stop her from getting hurt. It made sense, but they weren’t around to help, were they?

Vista swallowed past the sudden lump in her throat and slowly looked up. There, sitting on the edge of the roof in what she recognized from Saturday morning cartoons as a Sailor Senshi uniform, was the Simurgh.

The Endbringer waved.

“Oh,” Vista said.

“Yup,” Queen Administrator said. She looked up too, her head tilting to one side as if listening to something only she could hear. “Simmy says thanks for helping. Well, that’s not what she said, but it’s close enough. Also, she says that your costume makes you look like a marshmallow.”

Vista did not know what to say in response to that.

“It’s a compliment, I think,” Queen Administrator clarified. “So, can we go yet?”

“N-not yet,” Vista said. “We have to wait for the police.”

“I could watch him.”

Both girls jumped nearly a foot off the ground and they would--had they been asked--both deny being the one that squeaked.

Browbeat stared at the two of them as if they were idiots, then pointed at the mugger still swearing on the ground. “Um, if you want to keep going. I can handle him for a bit.”

“When did you get here?” Queen Administrator asked.

Browbeat somehow managed to look contrite even through his mask. “Sorry, I wasn’t being very loud. I didn’t want to interrupt you guys.”

“Wait, you’re saying you were there the whole time?” Queen Administrator looked up to the Simurgh. The Endbringer shrugged.

“Yeah?” he said. “I don’t like being the centre of attention is all.”

Queen Administrator gave him a very dubious look, then turned to Missy as if to confirm it. Missy just shrugged. It was true that he wasn’t very loud. “Okay then, so you’ll stay here, and we can go on?”

“Sure. I don’t really like ice cream anyway.”

***

Taylor gasped in mock horror. “You don’t like ice cream!” Browbeat shot her a look that she couldn’t quite read and she had to suppress another giggle. “I guess that’s okay. Hey, Vista, want to stop more muggings on the way to the ice cream parlour?”

Vista snorted. “I don’t think we’ll be running into any more muggers, Queen Administrator,” she said.

“Aww, call me Queen, and you never know!” Taylor suppressed the urge to smile as she shared what she hoped was a knowing look with the Simurgh. The Endbringer returned a less-than-inconspicuous wink.

They were still in a dirty alleyway right off one of the less popular streets and as far as Taylor knew that just wouldn’t do. If she was going to be a hero, then obviously she needed to find something heroic to do. Something like stopping muggers or catching people in the act of littering. Vile things that made the city of Brockton Bay a worse place to live.

“Come on, Vista,” Taylor said as she trooped out of the alley. “I’m sure we can find someone doing something vile and evil.”

The Ward followed after her, what little she could see of her face half bemused and half terrified.

Taylor paused as she reached the street. “You’ll have to show me how to do all the cool kung-fu bits,” she admitted. “But I guess we can start by finding someone to practice on first.”

“Um, I’m pretty sure that’s not how it works,” Vista pointed out. She sounded very reasonable for a girl that was still a few years younger than Taylor.

The street was, as it had been earlier, rather empty. There were a few people that looked as if they were moving things into an apartment block nearby, a couple of teens sitting on a porch while staring at their phones and not talking to each other, and a single woman with a can of soda tipped back to drink. Taylor eyed them all one by one, searching for something heroic to do.

Then the woman tossed her can off to the side where it clanged against the asphalt.

Eyes wide, Taylor looked both ways and crossed the street. Vista was after her with just a step and the Simurgh floated above, her head cocked to one side as though curious.

“Queen, what are you doing?” Vista asked.

“Didn’t you see that woman littering? I’m going to arrest her.”

The Ward paused, almost missing a step. “Queen, no.”

“Queen, yes!” Taylor replied.

The woman slid into a side road a little ways ahead. She was getting away, but she wasn’t fast enough!

Picking up the pace a little, Taylor spun around the corner and found her pinned against a wall, two men pointing knives at her chest. They were dirty, bedraggled people, looking like little more than castoff Merchants. Taylor narrowed her eyes. “You! I’m placing you under arrest!”

The two muggers and the litterer paused mid-mugging to stare at Taylor, then they followed the direction of her finger to the middle of the litterer’s chest. “Um, me?” the woman asked.

“Yes! Littering is a crime. And after all the effort we went through to clean this place. You really ought to be more considerate.”

“Um, Queen, I think those two were, um, also committing a crime,” Vista pointed out.

Taylor narrowed her eyes, her focus shifting onto the two men with knives. “Arrest them all and let the cops sort it out?” she asked.

“I think we could let the lady go if she promises not to throw trash in the streets again,” Vista said.

The woman was nodding violently, her eyes shifting from Taylor to Vista, to the Simurgh who was floating above them with an empty can of soda in one hand while her other hand waved from side to side in a ‘no-no’ gesture. The Endbringer looked very disappointed and Taylor could sympathise. Wasn’t the woman aware of what littering did to nature?

Taylor extended a hand to the woman, littlest finger extended. “Will you promise not to litter again?” she asked.

“I-I promise!” the woman squeaked.

“Pinky promise?” Taylor prompted, raising her hand a little.

The woman stared for half a second before joining her pinky to Taylors and they shook. “Can, can I go now?” she asked.

The Simurgh lowered herself to street level, then dropped the soda can only for it to hover to a stop before the woman. She snatched it out of the air, turned on a heel, and ran.

“So, that was fun. Want to zip tie those muggers too and then we can go?” Taylor asked Vista.

“Sure,” Vista said. She had started to lose that edge of tension, almost as if she had given up any hope of the rest of her day making any sense and was just flowing with the blows now. Taylor felt pride well up in her chest at a job well done.

“And after that, we can go flying with Simmie and find more crimes!” Taylor announced. That seemed to perk the Ward up a bit.

[Affirmative!] The Simurgh added. [Will Fly with Host-Queen_Administrator and Host-Environmental_Warper!]

“That sounds like fun?” Vista said.

***

Vista was not having fun.

In fact, this was the opposite of fun.

“Then what?” Armsmaster asked.

She was locked in a ten by ten room, only a table and two chairs to accompany her. Across from her sat her nominal leader, Armsmaster, in a reinforced chair that supported his armoured frame.

She had been in M/S rooms like these before; that wasn’t too bad. She had never been drilled for six hours straight in one before, though.

“And then,” she said for the hundredth time, “Queen Administrator asked the Simurgh for the location of another crime in progress.”

Armsmaster looked off into the distance for a moment. “That was the... seventeenth mugging, correct?” he asked.

She shrugged. “I lost count after the first dozen. They just kind of--” She paused, looking for a way to say what she wanted without sounding whiny. “They just kind of blurred together.”

The Protectorate hero made a noise that really didn’t mean anything. “This was just before you took a... break, yes?”

“Yeah,” she said. “I think so. We stopped for ice cream. Which I had to pay for because she had no money. Then we stopped by a hardware store.”

“Why?”

Vista resisted the urge to sigh, she really did. One escaped anyway. “I was out of zip-ties.”

“I see,” he said in a monotone that made her want to rip her hair out. “For clarification, could you start from the beginning one more time?”

Vista’s head hit the table.

***

Man this chapter did not want to write itself. Also, it was fluff that added very little to the actual story. Hence the rather lame ending, I wanted it over before it dragged on too long.

Next chapter should be more in line with what I want. Mucho Credits to Vhalidictes and eschwartz and js_za and ChaoticSky!

 

Next time, on How to Train Your Endbringer!

Taylor visits royalty. The Simurgh has her marshmallows and eats them too. The story turns into a foodfic. A castle is built.


	25. Chapter 25

In Which Taylor Finds a Princess

Taylor was hungry.

This was not a problem without a solution. In fact, as she sat in her living room next to Cass and watched reruns of Bugs Bunny--for inspiration, of course--she recalled that a particular local heroine owed her lunch.

That was good. It was an excuse to go out and not have to do the hero thing. Not that the hero thing was bad. In fact, she’d been doing it for the past few days.

The problem was that after her first romp around the Bay with Vista news started to spread that she and Simmy were on the hunt for bad guys and gals. The day after was not nearly as productive and she was afraid that if she went out again they would be hard-pressed to find anyone doing anything malicious.

Also, the police were tired of her calling them to arrest jaywalkers.

On the plus side, that meant that her efforts at heroism were totally working. She deserved a break.

“Hey, Cass, I’m heading out to grab a bite. Glory Girl owes me lunch. Wanna come?”

Cass looked up from where she was slouched on the end of Taylor’s couch. “You’ll get her to pay for our lunch?”

“She lost a bet,” Taylor explained.

A slow, rather cruel smile crossed Cass’s features and she started to roll off the couch and onto the floor. “Hell yeah, I’m in.”

“Language!”

The girl rolled her eyes. “Tay, hell isn’t a swear.”

“Well, it’s a rude word.” Taylor stretched out as she stood. “Should we go in costume or just as is?”

Cass yawned into a closed fist. “Don’t have a costume.”

“I’m sure Simmy could throw something together in a pinch,” Taylor said.

Cass shook her head violently. “Hell no. I won’t go out in some skimpy-ass miniskirt and thigh-highs. I’m going to get changed into something other than PJs, but I’m going in civvies.”

Taylor watched Cass leave the living room and run upstairs. She kind of wanted to go as herself too, but that might be rather bad for her secret identity, especially since she didn’t intend to walk to wherever they were going and was planning on using Simurgh Air.

Then again, her robes were super comfy.

Her decision made, Taylor twisted her bracelet around and spun the appropriate bead. With a flash of light she was dressed. Grinning at the effortless change, Taylor started looking around her for her phone. She had texts to send.

***

Amy stepped out of the gloomy halls of Arcadia and into the brilliant afternoon sun waiting for her outside. She took in a deep gulp of fresh air, thankful once again that the rest of the semester was cut down to half-days. And, of course, when she opened her eyes, her Vicky was waiting for her, floating an inch off the ground with a radiant smile on her lips.

“Ames, you’ll never guess who just texted me!” Vicky said as she wheeled around and started flying next to Amy.

She gave her sister a small smile of her own. “You know I don’t care much for guessing games.”

“Aww, don’t be a sourpuss,” Vicky said as she knocked shoulders with her. Amy gave her a flat look, or tried to, but the good mood was contagious. Vicky showed off her phone’s screen. “It’s Queen Administrator. You remember how I owed her lunch? Well, she’s collecting.”

Amy sighed and shook her head. The bet had been stupid, but knowing Vicky she was going to keep her end of the bargain. And it wasn’t like she personally disliked Queen Administrator even if the girl was... bizarre. If there was anyone out there that could understand having a power that was dangerous it was certainly Amy Dallon.

There was a whisper, in the back of her mind, wondering who between the two of them was more dangerous.

“Where are we going?” Amy asked.

Vicky gave her a surprised look. “You want to come?”

Amy gave her the look. The one that said that Vicky had asked a silly question. “Why wouldn’t I want to come?”

“Because you’ll have to sit at a table with other human beings and actually say more than three words,” Vicky pointed out.

It was Amy’s turn to bump shoulders with her sister. “I’m not that bad. And Queen Administrator is... fun.”

“Ohh! Is my little sister”--Vicky paused to gasp--“making friends?” She spun around in midair, then came to rest with her head on Amy’s shoulder. Her legs were floating out behind her, crossed at the ankle. “Do I need to take a picture for posterity?

Amy ducked down between one step and the next, sending Vicky flailing towards the ground, her arms cartwheeling to keep balance. “I didn’t say she was my friend. She’s just nice and... innocent, I suppose.” Amy waited for Vicky to catch up a few steps away. “And it’ll just be me, you and her?” she asked.

“Well, us two, Queenie, and probably the Simurgh and Leviathan.” Vicky blinked at her own statement. “We’re going to have lunch with Endbringers. That’s not the sort of thing I’d ever expected to say out loud before.”

Amy could only agree. The Endbringers were still monsters. Leashed monsters with little more than a teenager with dubious sanity holding the other end. But they had personality, beyond what she would have attributed to a living natural disaster. The day Leviathan hit Brockton Bay, a lot of things turned on their heads. “Where are we eating anyway?”

“Ah, I haven’t picked a place out yet. Fugly Bob’s? He just reopened.”

Amy gave it a moment’s thought, then shook her head. “Too cramped. You don’t want Leviathan tearing a wall apart by accident.”

Vicky snorted at the image. “Yeah. Queenie’s little friends are real collateral damage magnets.”

She bit her cheek to stop herself from calling out Vicky’s hypocrisy. “Uh-huh. Is anything open on the Boardwalk?”

“There’s that Italian place?”

That sounded good to Amy. She wasn’t super hungry yet but she was ready to eat something. “Sure. You can afford to cover for us, right?”

“Ah,” Vicky said. “Probably? How much does a Leviathan eat?”

Amy rolled her eyes, but checked to make sure her wallet was in her purse anyway. It was just so typical of Vicky to forget that part. “C’mon, I’ll text her for you, you do the flying,” Amy said, gesturing as she did for Vicky’s phone.

Vicky tossed her phone and Amy just barely caught it. She shot her sister a glare that went ignored before Vicky scooped her up in both arms and shot into the sky. Amy decided to forgive her sister as she cuddled closer to her chest. She moved her purse around and dropped it onto her lap, then brought Vicky’s phone close enough to see through her squint.

>>Glory_Girl: Hey, Queen Administrator, its Amy, Im texting 4 Vicky. Want 2 meet up at the italian place near the boardwalk?

>>Queen_Administrator: *It’s. *I’m. *For. *To. Hello Amy! You’re coming too? That’s brilliant. Cass and I will be there in two or three minutes. Is that the one with the big terrace?

>>Glory_Girl: Yeah thats the 1.

>>Queen_Administrator: *That’s. *One.

Amy huffed. “She keeps correcting my grammar, it’s like she’s never texted before.”

“Maybe she hasn’t?” Vicky said. “Didn’t you get the impression that she’s a little, um, sheltered?”

She only made a non-committal grunt in reply. “So, how are you going to pay?”

“Oh, I dunno. Maybe we could dine and dash?” There was a hint of humour in Vicky’s voice and Amy leaned back to look her sister in the eye.

“Hasn’t Queen Administrator been arresting everyone that jaywalks or parks illegally or whatever for the past couple of days?”

“Hey!” Vicky shot back. “She also stopped a bunch of muggers and stuff too.”

“Oh, is that a note of jealousy I hear, dear sister of mine?” Amy asked. “Did you want to fly around with the Simurgh stopping petty crimes too? I’m sure she’d let you come along. You could carry the zip-ties to make yourself useful.

Vicky didn’t meet her eyes for a bit. “I’m not jealous.” she said jealously. “It’s just that she has it really easy when it comes to stopping people.”

“I can’t think of anyone that wants to play peekaboo with the Simurgh,” Amy said flatly. “At least there weren’t as many people coming in because some Merchant knock-off stabbed them yesterday. And people are driving safer too. Now, if she could scare people into exercising and eating right I might actually get some time off.” Not that she would know what to do with it, she admitted to herself.

Vicky started angling down and Amy was disappointed to see that they were already over the Boardwalk. She spied Leviathan laying on its back in the waters of the bay, just floating there and staring up at the sky with all four eyes. The Simurgh, meanwhile, was moving tables around on the little terrace of the cafe they were supposed to meet at.

Squinting, Amy caught sight of Queen Administrator, sitting at the only table undisturbed by the Endbringer, with another girl by her side. Cass, if she remembered correctly, the girl with the powers that were suspiciously similar to Rune of the Empire Eighty-Eight.

Vicky landed with her usual grace and Amy dislodged herself from her sister’s grasp with only a bit of reluctance. “Hello everyone,” she said.

“Glory Girl, Panacea!” Queen Administrator jumped to her feet and practically bounced around the table. She engulfed the two of them in a hug, one arm around each of them, and squeezed. Amy was momentarily envious of her sister’s Brute rating. Queen Administrator had a strong hug.

“Hey there, Queenie,” Vicky said. “I think that’s enough hugging. You’ve filled Amy’s quota for the month.”

Laughing, the crazy cape let go of the Dallon sisters and spun as she stepped away. “I’m glad you both showed up. The more the merrier, right? Oh, and Simmy wanted to join us. But Levi didn’t, so I told him he could go swim or whatever. I hope you don’t mind?” She actually sounded a little worried in the end, as if their opinion mattered. It was actually kind of flattering, and reminded Amy of why she was growing to like the girl.

Vicky gave the Simurgh, who was done rearranging all the seats so that she had place to sit, a wary look. “I guess that’s not a problem.”

“Cool!” Queen Administrator said. “I kinda hoped you and Simmy would be friends, since you’re kind of the same and all.” She pulled out a chair and flopped into it, her robes bunching around her waist until she straightened them out. “Oh, you guys all remember Cass, right?”

“Yo,” Cass said.

Amy gave the girl a friendly nod and pulled up her own chair next to her sister. She had the difficult choice of sitting next to Queen Administrator or the Simurgh and chose the girl.

“Uh, what did you mean, about us being the same?” Vicky pointed between herself and the Endbringer with a thumb.

“Well, you both like flying, you both have emotional manipulating aura thingies, you’re both really tough, and you’re both white.” Queen Administrator looked up from the menu and saw the horror writ across Vicky’s face. “Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to be racist. Some of my best friends are white!”

Amy and Vicky just stared as the girl waved her arms around wildly and tried to prove that she wasn’t racist. Then, she turned to the Simurgh with wide eyes. “No!” she screamed. “Simmy, I love you even if you’re white. You don’t need to change your skin colour for me. N-not that I wouldn’t love you even if you were some other colour.”

The Simurgh looked up from where she was pinching the back of a forearm and towards Queen Administrator. A shit eating grin was growing on the Endbringer’s face. That, finally, gave Queen Administrator pause. “Wait, you were just... don’t do that!” she told the Endbringer off. With a huff, she crossed her arms under a less-than-ample chest and leaned back into her chair. “Can we just pretend that none of that happened?”

“I don’t know,” Cass said. “Can I trust you after hearing your racist anti-white propaganda?”

Amy shook her head. She’d seen where that sort of bickering could lead. “How about we all just order lunch?” She fingered one of the menus left on the table.

There was a consensus that was reached when everyone pulled up a menu and the group went mostly quiet for a bit. There was some discussion about what the others were picking, but for a blissful few minutes they were silent.

A waiter came out of the restaurant, eyes glued on the Endbringer in their midst and his tray held against his chest as if it could shield him. “C-can I take your orders? Ladies?”

Amy rattled off hers, followed by Vicky and Cass, then it came around to Queen Administrator. “I’ll have the spaghetti with meat-sauce. Um, just water to drink. Oh, and do you have marshmallows?”

“M-marshmallows?” the man said, looking up from the notepad where he’d been writing down their orders.

“Yeah. It’s for her.” She pointed at the Simurgh who smiled and waved.

“I, I will find some, Miss,” he said. Amy almost felt bad for the man as he bowed and tried not to look at the Simurgh and focus on the four capes around the table instead.

“Awesome. That’s it for me. Thanks.”

Seeing the dismissal for what it was, the waiter turned tail and walked fast enough that it could almost be called running.

“So, how have you two been doing?” Queen Administrator asked. She was staring from one sister to the other.

“It’s been pretty quiet for me,” Vicky admitted. “We have some patrols this weekend, and the whole family volunteered to escort some of the last convoys into the bay this weekend, but other than that it’s been nice and quiet. I think things are really picking up, too.”

“Cool! Maybe I’ll join you guys? I’ve been meaning to get out of the city a bit. Maybe go down to Boston. But not this weekend because I’ll be busy. Oh, what about you, Panacea?”

“It’s Amy when I’m out of costume,” she said. “And it’s been the same old story for me. I’ve been spending a bit more time at the hospital this week, but that’ll end when classes go back to a normal schedule.”

“Yeah, sis spends like, all her time over there. It’s practically her home away from home. Casa de Amy.”

Queen Administrator spent a long few seconds staring right at Amy, her eyes filled with something that wasn’t quite pity, but more like... remorse? Amy felt distinctly uncomfortable under her gaze. “I wonder if we could help you?” she finally asked while turning her gaze towards the Simurgh.

It looked as though she was listening to something none of them could hear, and that alone creeped Amy right out. She felt Vicky shifting by her side. Queen Administrator’s head snapped around, eyes wide. She stood up, her chair clattering out behind her, but her full attention was on Amy.

Amy felt a pit open up in her chest. The girl knew something. Had the Simurgh revealed her secrets? She would, the giant white bitch.

“You... you’re a princess?!”

***

[Anticipation. Host-Queen_Administrator wants to Help Host-Queen_Shaper?]

Taylor felt her heart skip a beat. Unit-Three was obviously talking about Amy--about Panacea--but to use the queen title meant that Amy was on par with her, didn’t it?

Simmy must have read her mind because she added a bit of context to her mental ramblings. [Host-Queen_Shaper has the Ability to Shape all Organic Materials. Ability is on Par with all Other Queens.]

That was... huge. That meant that Amy was, if the Simurgh was right, her equal. Or maybe something close to an equal. Taylor couldn’t decide if this was a good thing or not. As far as she knew three minutes ago, Amy’s power was the ability to heal. But that couldn’t be all of it. There had to be more, something else that Amy--that Panacea--was hiding or was unaware of.

Taylor blinked when she realised that she was standing up, her chair forgotten behind her. She turned towards Amy, taking in the sarcastic healer with the slight bags under her eyes and the wary look on her face. “You... you’re a princess?!”

“What?” Amy said.

Taylor rushed around the table and tackled Amy into a hug that made her chair tilt dangerously back until Glory Girl caught it. “That’s so cool!”

“What?”

“Oh my gosh, we’re both royalty! We can be princesses together.”

“What?” Amy’s voice was growing progressively fainter and Taylor didn’t know if it was the surprise or the lack of blood on account of her fierce hug.

“This is spectacular,” Taylor declared.

“Sure it is,” Glory Girl said. “But, uh, how about you sit back down and explain it to us non-princesses before Amy runs out of air?”

Flushing, Taylor nodded at the suggestion and retreated to her chair which Unit Three had lifted back into place. She plopped back down.

“Okay,” the healer said. She brushed her hands across her lap, giving Taylor a concerned look the entire time. “Explain.”

Taylor nodded. “Okay, so you know how we’re all hosts to space aliens in our heads?” she asked.

They all gave her blank looks.

“Because of our powers,” she said, pointing to her head where she imagined the connection thingy was. “Anyway, the things we’re hosts to all have names. Like, um, mine’s called Queen Administrator. And Glory Girl’s is Aura Projector and Cass’s is Telekinetic Displacer.” She nodded along to what she was saying because the others sure weren’t. “Anyway, the names are kinda sorta like... ranks, I guess? Some are more important than others, you know? I mean, it’s not fair or anything, but some powers are just better than others. Anyway, so they have ranks, and, um, I don’t think there are that many Queens out there.” She looked towards the Simurgh for a response.

[Affirmative. One Remaining Queen Host. Host-Queen_Hostess. Local designation ‘Faerie Queen.’]

That made perfect sense. “Cool, Simmy says that the only other Queen around is the Faerie Queen.”

Amy’s face turned an interesting shade of off-white at that. “W-what’s that mean? You’re comparing me to the Faerie Queen?”

“Yeah. Well, her and me. You’re Queen Shaper. Which, um, I think it has something to do with shaping organics, which I guess is how you heal people.” Taylor thought on this for a moment. Her mind made an intuitive leap of logic. “Wait, does that mean the hospital is your castle?”

Instead of answering, Amy pointed past Taylor’s shoulder. “Look, our food!”

Taylor knew that Amy was trying to distract her, but then, she had just revealed that Amy was basically a princess and that had to be kind of daunting. Now Amy would have to change her entire wardrobe. Her costume obviously needed a crown.

“I need a crown too,” Taylor muttered under her breath. “And a scepter.”

She stopped when the nervous waiter slid a plateful of steaming pasta in front of her, then, with shaking hands, put a bowlful of fun-sized marshmallows in front of the Simurgh. The Endbringer was delighted, smiling and clapping her huge hands in a way that had the waiter almost dropping the rest of the food over Cass’s head. She popped one of the marshmallows in her mouth.

“D-do you, uh, ladies need anything?” the waiter asked. Taylor suspected that he was trying not to cry.

“We’re fine, thank you,” she said.

He didn’t pretend to walk away this time and Vicky snorted until Amy jabbed an elbow into her side.

“Should I keep calling you Queenie?” Cass asked.

Taylor was in the middle of making a slurpy mess of her plate when she paused to answer. “Why shouldn’t you?”

“Well, Amy here is apparently also a queen, and you can’t have two in the same city,” she explained while stabbing at her pesto testaroni as though it had insulted her heritage. She took a bite, then used the fork to point at Panacea. “She’s already got the castle-hospital.” She then turned to point the same fork at Vicky. “And she’s obviously the royal concubine. All she needs now is a crown.”

Amy’s face went very, very red and Taylor jumped in before her anger ruined their lunch. “Now, now, Cass. The hospital’s not really a castle. It doesn’t have towers. It’s not a proper castle until it has towers. And I’m sure Parian can make Amy a really cool crown if she asks.”

“You’re not going to poke at the concubine thing?” Vicky said with a grin that was rather salacious.

Taylor perked an eyebrow. “Should I?”

“No!” Amy retorted, her cheeks still a little pink. “Please don’t. Poke at it, I mean.”

“You know,” Taylor said after slurping up a noodle. “Simmy and Levi could probably build a tower next to the hospital. I’m sure the city wouldn’t mind. It could be like... Panpalace or something.”

“That’s a horrible name,” Cass pointed out.

[Agreed. Bad name.]

“Oh shush, it’s a perfect name.” Taylor huffed.

The Simurgh pressed a long finger to her cheek. [Could Build. Bedrooms, Observation Rooms, Living Space, Connection to Hospital, Dungeon, Waiting Area, Throne Room, Second Dungeon.]

“Wait, why would her tower need two dungeons?” Taylor asked, one eyebrow quirked as she looked up at the Endbringer sitting across from her.

“Is she actually planning on building a tower for Ames?” Vicky asked.

“Why not? Amy deserves it. She’s the only healer in the city and she’s totally awesome. Also, she’s a princess and princesses need towers so that knights can save them,” Taylor said quite seriously. It wouldn’t hurt for Amy to have a proper castle. In fact, the more she thought about it the more she wanted her own. She nodded and stuffed a forkful of noodles into her mouth.

[Second Dungeon is Sex Dungeon.]

Taylor choked on a noodle. She coughed, her eyes going watery as she thumped a fist against her chest and tried to breathe. Almost immediately Amy had a hand pressed against her neck and the coughing stopped and her airway cleared. “T-thanks,” Taylor said.

“What did she say that made you choke?” Amy asked.

Taylor felt warmth climbing to her face, more when she realised that Amy’s hand was still on her neck. “Um, she listed the rooms she could build in your tower, the Panpalace. Um. Sex Dungeon was on the list?”

Amy groaned, pulling her hand back to bury her face in both hands while her sister started cackling.

“Amy, is there something you’re not telling us?” Vicky needled.

“Shut up, concubine!” Amy fired right back, though it only made Vicky laugh all the harder until Amy flung a wadded up napkin at her.

Taylor let them bicker for a bit, her mind on other things. She noticed Cass joining in on the fun but that didn’t matter. She had reached a decision. “Unit Two?” she asked in a low voice.

{Unit-02 is Combat Ready.}

“Make me a castle.”

***

Next time, on How to Train Your Endbringer!

The Endbringers work together to build a castle. Taylor visits Castle Von Genocide (name pending). Princess Amy snarks.

Mucho Credits to Vhalidictes and eschwartz and js_za and ChaoticSky!


	26. Taylor's Blast to the Past

Taylor’s Blast to the Past

This is a non-canon Interlude to the main story. A bit of a ‘what if’ that popped into my head one night. It’s rather disjointed and has no real ending, but I think it’s enjoyable all the same.

***

Taylor woke up with a yawn and a stretch. She could hear the faint sound of birds singing just outside her window and the rumble of the house’s plumbing as someone used the shower. She turned around, blinking at her empty room and at the spot where Cass was supposed to be sleeping.

The girl wasn’t there, in fact, there wasn’t even a blanket where she usually slept. Shrugging it off, Taylor slowly rose out of bed and stood up. She searched with both eyes still half-lidded by sleep for something clean-ish to wear, then dressed as quickly as she could before Cass stumbled into the room or Simmy asked her if she needed help.

Stumbling downstairs, Taylor found her dad frying some eggs with a headful of wet hair. “Hey sweetie,” he said.

“Hrm.”

“I see. I take it you slept well then?” he asked, a hint of humour in his voice. “I made eggs,” he added unnecessarily.

“Uh-huh.” She took the plate he handed her and pretty much let her face fall into it. In no time at all she was done scarfing down the contents and lifted herself up to stare into her father’s concerned eyes. “That was good.”

“Um,” he said. “So are you looking forward to school today?”

“School? I quit last week,” she said.

Her father looked up from his mug of coffee, alarmed. “What?”

“Yeah? Don’t you remember? I said I could do more outside of school than in? Anyway, where’s Cass?”

“Cass? Wait, Taylor, what do you mean you quit school? Who’s Cass? Do you have a boyfriend you’re not telling me about?”

Taylor frowned. There was something very wrong going on. “Dad... what date is it?”

He was still giving her a gimlet eye, but he pushed a newspaper across the dining room table. That, alone, was a bad sign. The newspaper stations were still not delivering the daily news last she’d heard. Something about flooding being rather bad for paper.

She twisted the paper around and took in the headlines ‘Break in at the Ruby Dreams Casino’ was writ large across the front. Searching for a bit, her eyes fell on the date at the top. February, 23 2011.

“Oh snickerdoodles.”

And that’s when the Endbringer sirens went off.

***

It took a lot of effort to convince dad that he really, really needed to bring her to the PRT Headquarters and that no, it didn’t matter that the Endbringer Sirens were ringing. This was more important.

As he drove infuriatingly slowly, Taylor tried to tell him of her adventures after Leviathan attacked the Bay three months in the future, but he was rather hung up on the whole ‘Leviathan attacked the Bay’ bit and was generally being a poor conversationalist.

Finally, after what felt like a day but was most likely no more than half an hour, her dad’s truck stopped in front of the downtown headquarters of the PRT. The building looked much prettier pre-leviathan and pre-Lung and pre-Orbital-Friendship-Cannon, but Taylor didn’t stop to enjoy the view.

She hopped out of the truck, waved goodbye to her panicked dad, and zipped into the building. “I need an adult!” she screamed as she entered.

A lot of adults looked at her. That was good.

Pointing ahead of her, she stopped right at the front desk. “You’re not Tim,” she noted as she took in the name-badge of the woman behind the desk. ‘Jane,’ it read in fancy script. “That doesn’t matter. I need to get to Australia.”

“Um, excuse me?” Jane asked.

Taylor blinked at her, then remembered. She looked like a normal teen right now. A normal teen in a stained hoodie and jeans. Lifting a hand in a ‘one moment’ gesture, Taylor fiddled with her ever-present Friendship Bracelet and spun the appropriate bead.

With a flash of light she was no longer Taylor Hebert, the friendless loner and was now Queen Administrator, the equally friendless cape. It helped that, as soon as she shifted costumes, she felt a familiar weight in her robe’s pockets. “I need to get to Australia. Canberra. Like, right now.”

Jane had gone a little wide-eyed after the costume-change, but she nodded. “I’ll call someone to escort you to the meeting area. Transports will be leaving from the Rig.”

“Damn, if only Unit Two were here we could have gotten there by swimming,” she muttered. “Will Dragon be there?” she asked.

“I-I think so?” Jane said.

Nodding, Taylor yanked out her totally awesome Dragon-Tech phone and started fiddling with it.

>>Queen_Administrator: Dragon! I can’t explain why (though it’s probably one of Unit-Three’s pranks) but I’ve accidentally time travelled and now I need to get to Australia.

>>Dragon: Who are you and how did you get this number, and that phone?

>>Queen_Administrator: I’m Queen Administrator. You gave it to me, and you gave it to me. We don’t have time. I need to get to Canberra before Simmy does something stupid.

>>Dragon: I’m tracing the call.

>>Queen_Administrator: Okay. I’m in Brockton Bay’s PRT Headquarters. This is urgent, so please hurry up.

>>Dragon: Yes, yes you are. All right, if you’re a cape volunteering for Endbringer duty, then I can’t really refuse. Stay in the main lobby. New Wave is coming in for Strider transport soon.

>>Queen_Administrator: Thanks Dragon! You’re the best! Oh, and bring cookies.

Sliding her phone into a pocket, Taylor sighed with relief. Everything was going to be okay. She’d go see Simmy, and they’d be friends again, and she would be safe.

She flounced over to the chairs off to the side of the lobby, ignoring the Jane lady who wanted her to follow some Troopers in their scary armour as she flopped down into a seat and waited. I didn’t take long for others to show up.

The entirety of New Wave arrived as a single group, all the fliers filing into the lobby one after the other, some of them carrying the not-so-flight-capable members.

“Amy! Vicky!” Taylor said as she jumped to her feet.

The Dallon sisters looked at her, and the lack of recognition in their eyes had her deflating on the spot. “Oh, right, you guys don’t remember me yet.”

“Do you know my daughters?” Brandish asked. She had the sort of authoritarian tone Taylor associated to Principal Blackwell.

“Kinda? I mean, we’ll know each other in the future, but that’s later and right now they don’t know me and I know them.”

Her explanation didn’t seem to clear things up.

“Time travel,” she added.

“Holy shit, seriously?’ Vicky said.

“Yup.”

Amy’s eyes narrowed into suspicious slits and for a moment she looked a lot like her mom. “Prove it,” she said as she crossed her arms.

“Uh, we only met, like, three and a bit months from now, after Leviathan hit Brockton Bay.” There were a few gasps at that. “But you never really spoke much about your past. I know that Amy ruled part of the city as Queen Shaper in her hospital-castle and Vicky was her royal concubine.”

Amy’s face went very pale and Vicky started to laugh uproariously at that. “Ah, you had me going for a bit there,” she said.

Taylor shrugged, an easy smile coming up. “Yeah, sure. So, you guys ever been to Australia?

The group sombered up at that. “No, not really,” Vicky said. She adjusted the hem of her costume skirt and slid a little closer to Amy’s side.

Amy seemed to appreciate her sister’s closeness, and Taylor noticed the way her knuckles were white by her side.

“Ah, you two don’t have to worry so much. Just let me have a quick chat with the Simurgh and it’ll all be good. Though, uh, I could use some help actually getting to her, you know?”

Vicky tried on a smile, it wavered a bit at the edges but it was still there. “Sure, I’ll give you a lift once we get there.”

Everyone’s attention shifted when a man in a black and blue long coat and cap popped into the middle of the room. “I’m here for New Wave and,” his face turned towards Taylor, eyes hidden behind aviator goggles. “And friends. Everyone stay within a few feet. Come closer. No need to be shy now.”

When everyone came close, the man smiled. “And we’re off.”

***

The headquarters where they appeared was a mess. Capes were running all over, people were screaming in accented English and the hustle and bustle of a panicked yet organized crowd swarmed around New Wave.

A man in a PRT jumpsuit ran up to every cape, clamping something onto their left wrists and Taylor, upon recognizing Dragon’s logo on the wrist-band, let him clamp one onto hers. “What’s this?” she asked.

“It’s a bomb,” Vicky said, her voice sombre as she fingered the collar on her own wrist. “It’ll go off if you spend too much time near the great white bitch.”

“Cool,” Taylor said.

That earned her another look, but Vicky just shrugged it off.

“Flyers!” an agent called out. “We need flyers out there right now to support our Brute line! Blasters, focus on whatever she’s building.”

Vicky watched her family take off. “Still want that ride?” she asked.

“Yeah!” Taylor said. “Take me princess style, like you do for Amy. Oh, and see you later Panacea. Sorry for all the people you need to heal because of Simmy. I’ll make sure she knows that she shouldn’t have done that.”

The healer gave them both a wave, then rushed off towards a series of buildings off to the side with a huge red cross on the side.

Vicky’s arms were not nearly as comfy as Amy made them look. Her arm was digging into the back of her knees and butt and her chest was so big it was all up in her face. Taylor didn’t know how Amy could endure it all the time.

To distract herself, she started to stare down at the city. Canberra was pretty, far prettier than Brockton Bay. It was also a much newer-looking city. There were skyscrapers everywhere and thousands of cars clogging up the streets. There was also plenty of room for pedestrians, she noticed. Even as she looked, there were hundreds of people out running towards the edges of the city.

“Can you hear her?” Vicky said and there was a quavering note to her voice.

Taylor blinked and strained her ears and yes, she could hear a rather pretty voice calling out over the city. Following the sound, she soon spotted Unit-Three floating above a grey building, bits of rubble and science-techno-thingies hovering around her while capes flashed by at startling speed. “Get me closer!” Taylor called.

Vicky nodded, her hair whipping out behind her as she zoomed in towards the Simurgh. A few capes looked their way, but in the chaos of the battlefield they were just two more people occupying the skies.

When they were only a few blocks away, Vicky started to slow down and Taylor cleared her throat.

Alexandria was nearby, carrying a lamppost by one end as though it were a huge hammer. A few capes flew by her side, blasting away at the bits of rubble and junk that spun around Unit Three as though she were the centre of a very picky hurricane.

“Whatever you’re going to do, now would be the time,” Vicky said.

Taylor nodded. “Gosh darn it Unit Three!” she screamed. “I know this is all your fault! Now, override that silly primary directive of yours and come down here right now. I’m grounding you!”

“Oh my god,” Vicky said. “You’re insane.”

The cloud of stuff around the Simurgh froze and the Endbringer’s song stopped mid-note. Her huge eyes snapped towards Taylor and for perhaps the first time there was an expression on the Endbringer’s face: apprehension.

The capes around them paused for just a second before redoubling their efforts. Beams of light shot by, Tinkertech guns went off and the sky around the Simurgh turned into a mess of explosions and wanton destruction.

Taylor scowled. “Oh, for pete’s sake, I can’t hear anything. Unit Three, could you stop them? You know, without hurting them?”

[Affirmative!] came a voice in Taylor’s mind and she almost slumped back in relief. To hear one of her friends, even one that was as annoying as Simmy, was the biggest reassurance there was.

Tinkertech guns misfired. Capes about to use their powers only shot fizzles or missed outright and Alexandria, who was rushing at the Simurgh with her lamppost, froze in mid-air only feet away from the Endbringer.

“Okay, Vicky, bring me closer,” Taylor said.

Vicky stared, eyes wide. “You, you can control her?” she said.

“Well, yeah, obviously,” Taylor replied. “And she’s been very naughty, so I need to give her a proper talking to. Oh, and I need to overwrite the thing that makes her kill people all the time.”

Vicky didn’t seem to know what to do for a moment, but then she looked around at all the people still running away and at the capes frozen across the battlefield, almost as though time had stopped in random places. “Okay,” she said.

When they were level with the Endbringer, Taylor fixed her with a careful eye. She was all covered in dents and scratches and was, quite obviously, naked. Taylor brought up a hand with three fingers raised. “Okay, so, same as last time. I have three directives for you. First, make sure I’m safe and listen to what I say. And no rules lawyering! You’re a precog, you know what I meant when I say something.” She lowered a finger. “Next, don’t hurt people, not unless they were going to hurt me or I specifically tell you to hurt them.” She lowered the last finger. “And finally, be sure to keep yourself safe, unless it’s to protect me. Got it?”

[Excited! New Primary Directives Accepted.] The Simurgh’s face twisted into a happy smile. [Current Objectives?]

“First, can you hold me up? I think Vicky’s tired of doing that.” Taylor almost yelped when a telekinetic hand wrapped around her waist and yanked her out of Vicky's grip to hold her hovering in the air above the city. “Oh, cool. Um, can you do the invisible platform thing?” she asked and as soon as the words were out the grip loosened as she felt as though she were standing on solid ground. “Thank you!” She bounced a few times on the balls of her feet.

[Host-Queen_Administrator is Welcome.]

“You can fly?” Vicky asked. She was staring mostly at the Simurgh but kept shooting glances at Taylor.

“Nope. Simmy’s holding me up,” she explained then watched, fascinated, as the blood drained from Glory Girl's face. “Anyway. I’ve rewritten her directives now, so she should be mostly harmless.”

“M-mostly?” Vicky asked.

Taylor shrugged. “Endbringers hold back a lot.” She turned, levelling a smile that was all teeth at her friend. “Speaking of. I want an explanation for why I woke up in the past this morning.”

[Uncertain. Can’t explain.]

“Can’t, or don’t want to? Because I will ground you.” Taylor placed her hands on her hips. “No anime. For a month.”

The Simurgh gasped. She pressed two huge hands over where her heart would be were she human and not a fifteen foot tall machine of death, destruction and carnage. Tears, or at least some sort of condensation, was gathering at the corners of her eyes.

“Okay, fine, a week,” Taylor caved and the tears evaporated.

“You gave in?” Vicky asked.

“She’ll be a real brat if I don’t,” Taylor explained.

[Negative. Is Not a ‘Brat’]

Taylor snorted. “You don’t know loopholes until you see her playing with them,” she told Vicky. “Speaking of, Unit Three, could you release all the capes? They must be tired of hanging there.”

[Affirmative.]

All around them Capes tumbled out of the air for a few seconds as Unit Three’s grip on them loosened. Some, most even, immediately took off and flew away from the area, some of them fighting with the bracelets wrapped around their wrists.

Taylor looked down at her own bracelet, on the opposite hand as her Friendship Bracelet. “Can you take this off?” Taylor asked Unit Three.

With a shrug, the Endbringer waved a giant hand and the bracelet tore itself in half and was shot out into the air in a gentle arc that happened to hit a cape in a green cloak in the back of the head not a half second before it exploded.

“D-did she just explode Eidolon?” Vicky asked. She sounded rather faint.

[Mistake. Is Very Sorry.]

Taylor winced and waved at the member of the Triumvirate who was now flying in a dizzying loop towards the ground. “Sorry!” she called out moments before another flying cape zipped in and held him up. “Aw, shucks, I’m really making a mess, aren’t I?”

Taylor was about to start explaining thing to Vicky when a black and grey blur came to a stop a few metres away. She stared up at a woman in an iconic costume, the lighthouse on her chest prominent and the bit of her face not hidden by a curved mask turned down in a distasteful scowl. “What’s going on?” Alexandria asked.

“Not much,” Taylor said.

“Not... much,” the heroine repeated.

“Well, Unit Three here played a nasty prank on me but I’m grounding her,” she explained. “Also, hi! I don’t think we’ve ever met before or will have had met later.” It was Taylor’s turn to frown. “English isn’t a very time-travel friendly language.”

Alexandria didn’t quite seem to know what to do with that, so she went on the offensive. “You stopped her song?” she asked.

“No?” Taylor said. “I mean, she doesn’t need to sing unless she wants to. I mostly asked her to stop because it’s hard to talk to someone while they’re singing, you know?”

“You can communicate with it?” the Triumvirate cape asked.

“She’s a her. And yeah.” Taylor shifted around, her robes swinging around her legs in a gesture she’d come to associate with her own nervousness. “Yeah, so I’m gonna go home now,” she said. “Vicky, you’re welcome to stop by the castle anytime. Oh, and Amy too!”

“The castle?” Vicky asked. Alexandria looked like she was going to say something else but paused to see what Taylor was going to say about her castle.

“Yeah, it’s in the Bay. Or was. Or will have been in the Bay...” Taylor sighed. “Imagine a Disney castle.” Vicky nodded. “Now imagine it’s in Brockton Bay.” Vicky nodded again. “Now imagine it was made by Leviathan.” Vicky did not nod. “That’s the castle. You should stop for tea sometime.” She stretched a little, then remembered that Leviathan wasn’t with her anymore.

[Nervous. Activate Friendship Protocols?] The Simurgh shifted a little, her hands folding under her chest and her wings moving a little closer to her body.

A smile split Taylor’s face. “That’s a great idea, Unit Three. Go ahead!”

[Affirmative.]

Feeling as though a weight had been lifted off her shoulders, Taylor turned back to the two Alexandria-packages, one of which was Alexandria. “Anyway, we’ll be off. I’m sorry if Unit Three was a bother. Hey, do you think we can borrow that teleporter guy with the cool glasses?”

Alexandria stood a little taller, something dark and dangerous glinting in her eyes. “I’m afraid that it’s not that simple,” she said and her voice was flat, cold even.

“Why’s that?”

“We can’t just let you leave. You’re controlling the Simurgh. If this isn’t some elaborate act then I’ll have to insist that you come with us.”

Taylor pouted. “But I want to go home.”

Alexandria looked at her for a few long seconds, as though weighting something. “If you try, I’ll have to stop you.” The heroine floated a little higher, arms straight by her side and legs spaced out as though ready to fight at a moment’s notice.

“Oh, oh, oh!” Taylor clapped. “I always wanted to say this.” Sher coughed and cleared her throat, then looked Alexandria right in the eye, all traces of humour fading. “You and what army?”

Vicky buried her face in both hands.

Alexandria tilted her head to one side, then gestured out behind her.

Taylor was surprised. Admittedly, she wasn’t paying attention to what was going on around her too much, but something told her she should have noticed the nearly two hundred capes lining the rooftops below or flying around them in wide circles and staring. “Oh, that army.”

There was a palpable tension in the air. So many heroes and villains, all gathered to fight a battle that they would almost certainly lose, all facing a single girl that looked as though she were suddenly out of her depth.

The visible part of Alexandria’s face twisted into an almost cruel smile. “How about you come with me. I’m sure we can find a satisfactory solution to all this.”

Taylor crossed her arms. She didn’t want to go with the heroine. It wasn’t that she didn’t like Alexandria, it was that it felt as though they were all looking at her and Simmy as if they were the enemy and her friends weren’t anyone’s enemy. They were big and cuddly and had never been anything but nice to her.

The last time, in the future, she’d had time for people to see that, to grow used to Unit-Two and then Unit-Three, but this time it was too soon. These people were here for a fight and she wasn’t sure if she could win without hurting them with Unit-Three alone.

The ground shook and rumbled. The capes standing on rooftops looked around in a panic as the entire city trembled, then someone screamed while pointing out to the horizon. From her height above the city, Taylor could just make out the shimmering ocean, an ocean that was growing and growing until finally an explosive culum tore out of it.

The rumbling that had subsided started to build up again and Taylor looked down and through the transparent pane that was holding her up to see a small hill in a park explode outwards, sending dirt and rocks flying everywhere.

The Leviathan crashed into the side of a sidecraper, his long arms gripping into its side while steel and glass and water cascaded out around him.

From the crater of the explosion below rose the Behemoth. His single blazing eye burned as he stared right up and at Taylor, then slowly swiveled his head to take in the masses of now terrified capes.

{Unit-02 Answering Host-Queen_Administrator’s request: Activate Friendship Protocols.} Leviathan said, his smooth voice slipping into her mind.

Behemoth screamed into her head with a voice like a fog-horn that smoked three packs a day.

Taylor grinned up at Alexandria, setting her feet wide apart like the superheroes in her morning cartoons. “I am willing to accept you unconditional surrender!”

***

I now have a Pateon! So that's a thing.


	27. Chapter 27

In Which Taylor Visits her Royal Abode

Trying a slightly new writing style in this one. Bit more descriptive, which is handy since the gang is going exploring.

***

{Affirmative. Use Local Resources?}

“As long as you don’t hurt anyone,” Taylor muttered before spearing a tomato with her fork and chewing.

She was just starting to scrape the remains of the sauce off her plate when she realised that all the conversation at the table had stopped. Amy, Vicky and Cass were all staring past Taylor’s shoulders and off into the Bay.

There was now a building competing with the Rig for attention out in the waters of Brockton Bay. It was a huge towering edifice of ice and cascading water. It rose out of the Bay like a spire surrounded by a million jagged spikes, all sharp points and sharp edges as though someone had tried to build something using a pile of kitchen knives as inspiration. The centre of it had a column of water that splashed up and reached towards the sky before tumbling back down into the forest of spines like the most demented fountain ever.

“Hmm,” Taylor said. “A bit too spiky. Unit Three, help him out a bit.” She turned back and looked to see if she could find a menu. There was still room for dessert.

{Affirmative. Unit-03 will Accept Aid from Unit-02 in Designing Host-Queen_Administrator Fortress of Genocide-Prevention.}

“Uh, Tay?” Cass said. She was pointing with her fork at where the spire had been.

This time, when Taylor looked, it was to have her eyes cross and her head start pounding, a dull throb building in the back of her head. “Um,” she said as she took in what might have been a building, or a tower. Maybe. It was a collection of shapes, each one sliding in and out of the other in ways that really shouldn’t have been possible yet still were.

Every time she tried to get a sense of scale her mind just blanked and trying to focus on any one part of it had her attention slipping off and into the fractal abyss held in the icy plates of what might have been the object’s walls.

“Simmy, what?”

[Pretty. Non-Euclidean! Stares back.]

“No Simmy, just, no.” Taylor shut her eyes and after a few seconds the pain started to fade. When she no longer had the impression that the shadows behind her eyelids were going to swallow her she opened her eyes again to see the Bay once more empty save for the Rig. “Maybe something from Lord of the Rings or something? Oh! Make it a Disney castle.”

“You’re insane,” Amy said, though there was no venom in her voice. She was just stating it as though it were fact.

Taylor grinned at her fellow royal, then at the palace growing out of the water. It had three towers--two at the front and one in the rear--all surrounding a chateau with a peaked roof. Gargoyles appeared on the edges of the roof and colonnades of spun ice tore out of the Bay, forming a massive drawbridge suspended before mammoth doors at the front of the castle.

Thin filigree shaped like petals of snow grew off every edge and corner, giving the entire castle a cold yet delicate appearance, as though just a bit of warmth would be enough to melt it all away.

“Pretty,” Taylor said as she took it in. And it truly was beautiful. All shades of blue and white, glinting like a kaleidoscope as the noonday sun’s light fractured through icy walls and painted the entire thing in all the shades of the rainbow. “Ah, shucks, we could have had a sing-along while building the castle, like something out of a movie.”

[Excited! Can Sing! Pretty voice.] The Simurgh sang a quick do-re-mi that had everyone wincing.

Amy gave Taylor a flat look. “Queen Administrator, please don’t ask the Simurgh to sing.”

“Ah-hah, sorry?” she said. “So, should we get dessert, or do you guys want to visit the castle?” Taylor’s brow twisted into a thoughtful frown. “Also, I need to name it.”

“No, we need to name it,” Cass said. “Taylor, if you name it, it’ll be called MorsDeath Von Killkittens Castle or something equally hideous.” Vicky giggled into her palm, earning a glare from Cass. “Don’t laugh, Glory Girl.”

“Hey!” Taylor and Vicky said at the same time.

“Cass is right,” Amy said, earning twin looks of horror. “Also, Taylor, I’m full, so I’ll be skipping on the dessert. We can visit... MorsDeath Von Killkittens whenever you want.”

“Please don’t start calling it that,” Cass said with a note of begging in her voice.

“Well, if she’s going to call my castle the Panpalace I’ll mock hers too.”

Vicky quirked an eyebrow at her sister. “You don’t have a castle. Unless you were planning on building one? Sex dungeons and all.” Vicky suppressed a grin upon seeing Amy’s blush. “Oh-hoh, my sister has visions of royalty.”

Taylor stood up, her chair clattering back. “Okay! Let’s go visit the Icy Doom Castle!”

“No, Taylor, we’re not calling it the Icy Doom Castle,” Cass pointed out.

“How about, um, Ebola Plagues Doom Fortress?”

Cass pinched the bridge of her nose. “New rule. No names related to things that kill people. Also, that name would be way better for Panacea’s castle.”

“What?” Amy asked. “Are you mocking my Cancer Castle? Do you want me to lock you up in my dungeon? And not the fun one.”

Cass snorted and even Taylor giggled at her fellow princess’s snark. The other girls were standing now too, all except for Vicky who flew into the restaurant proper to pay for the food. Taylor, meanwhile, hopped over the little fence that marked off the terrace from the Boardwalk, and made her way over to the edge of the water nearest the castle. It was still a good kilometer away and into the Bay, a little farther out than the Rig. It just looked closer on account of how huge it was.

She felt a little tingle of pleasure in her gut, knowing that her fortress was bigger than the Protectorate’s.

“So, find any other names?” Amy asked as she snuck up beside her.

“Hrm, maybe I should name it after what it’s supposed to do,” Taylor said.

“That sounds... practical.”

“How’s Protecto-Fortress-Castle sound?”

“It’s perfect,” Amy said with a voice so devoid of emotion she could have passed for a robot.

Taylor huffed. “Fine. And here I was going to help you build your castle later.” She crossed her arms under her chest and made sure Amy caught a glimpse of her pout.

She could feel the healer’s eyes on her for a few long seconds before she spoke. “You really want me to have a castle?”

“Or a palace. And a crown, of course. You could make it out of people.”

Taylor thought Amy might blanch at that, but instead her eyes went glassy for a moment as though thinking of how exactly she’d go about doing just that. “You know what? Fine. I could use a place of my own anyway. It’d show Carol up if I had a house that was nicer than hers.”

“And the crown?”

“M-maybe not that,” Amy admitted.

“You could make it out of flowers! Or kittens! That way, when you’re stressed, you could just pet your head and the crown would start purring.”

“That,” Amy said, “was perhaps the most horrific thing I have ever heard. I think Carol would have a conniption. I like it.”

Taylor grinned at her princess friend. “Hey, can you turn people into cat-people? Like, could you give Vicky a tail and fluffy kitty ears and make it so that she wants belly rubs and purrs when you scritch her behind the ears? Because that would be adorable! Actually, I think she’d be more of a dog person, now that I think about it. You could play fetch! Although, you might end up having her trying to lick you all over.”

Amy’s face had started red and kept getting darker with every word out of Taylor’s mouth. “L-let’s just visit the castle,” she said in a voice that was just shy of a scream. Cass placed a comforting hand on the healer’s shoulder.

“The trick is to stop her before she starts motormouthing,” Cass advised sagely. “It’s just easier that way.”

Taylor ignored them in favour of searching the waters for Unit Two. She found him on his back, staring up at the sky as if he had no cares in the world. Her first BFF really liked playing in the water. “Hey, Unit Two, could you make us a bridge to the Freezy Icy Ice Castle?” She turned to her human friends hopefully.

“Vetoed.” Cass shot the name down.

“Aww.”

{Unit-02 preparing Construction of Bridge for Host-Queen_Administrator. Utilizing Plans created by Unit-03.} With a lazy swish of his hand, Leviathan gestured between the stretch of Boardwalk where they were gathered and the distant castle. Nothing happened for a moment, then the water in a straight line between the two points began to waver before a structure slowly rose out from between the churning waves.

The bridge was just wide enough that a pair of cars could have driven on it side-by-side. Guardrails as tall as Taylor shot out of the sides, each one a twisting spiral of ice set roughly a meter apart with a wall of gigantic snowflakes growing between them and fractal spines pointing away from the walkway.

The Boardwalk shook as the foot of the bridge crashed through the newly repaired rails and set itself at Taylor’s feet. “Taa-daa!” Taylor said.

“We could have just flown over,” Cass pointed out. “I could lift some benches and Vicky could carry one of us. Or you could’ve ridden with the Simurgh.”

“Yeah, but this way people can visit my castle without having to fly. Also, now I can say that the Bay is my moat.”

“Your moat is almost a mile across?” Vicky asked.

“All the better to keep all my precious things safe,” Taylor said. “Not that I actually have anything to put there yet. I’ve got that figurine that Legend signed, and his panties, but that’s about it.”

All three girls looked as though they wanted to ask about her figurine, but they just imitated fish for a moment before thinking better of it. Taylor smiled at them, then took the first step onto the bridge.

She had kind of expected it to be slippery, what with the entire thing being made of ice and all, but there was plenty of traction, and upon squinting at the surface a bit, she noticed a diamond pattern etched into and through it. The entire bridge was porous. Probably, she realised, to stop rain from collecting on it.

With a skip in her step, Taylor led her small procession along.

“That is way bigger than I thought it was,” Cass said when they grew closer. Her neck was craned way back to stare up at one of the two towers that guarded the drawbridge. It was, Taylor guessed, about half as tall as the Medhall building, which itself had fifty-odd floors.

They slowed to a stop at the place where the bridge ended, maybe twenty meters away from the drawbridge that would let them get farther in. “Um,” Taylor said. She looked around, then spotted a pillar of the bridge that was wider than the rest, its top curving in towards the group like an upside-down teardrop. There was something like a panel on the icy surface.

When she approached, it was to find the rough outline of a hand. Taylor pressed hers against it, and rather than feel the coolness of ice she felt a warmth race up her arm.

[Smug. Good Security.]

“Very cool,” Taylor said. “Is it Tinkertech?”

Unit Three’s preening was all the answer she needed.

With a shudder that they felt rather than heard, the drawbridge lowered. Chains of gleaming steel held the massive plate that made up the last portion of the bridge. With a heavy clunk, it fit into place, allowing them their first view into the courtyard.

Taylor raced ahead of her friends, spun around to face them, and spread her arms wide as if in invitation. This, she thought, was what Willy Wonka must have felt like. “Welcome, friends, to the Grand Administratorius!”

“I give the showboating a two out of ten,” Cass said.

Amy snorted. “I’ll give it a three. But the name’s not bad. It’s not good, but it’s not bad.”

“You’re just angry because my castle’s cooler than yours,” Taylor said.

“I don’t have a castle,” Amy shot back.

Taylor’s smile could have rivalled the Simurgh’s for smugness. “Exactly.” Turning on a heel, Taylor crossed the bridge and stepped into the courtyard of the castle proper. Only now that she was in front of the main palace was she able to really take it all in.

The main building looked like a chateau that should have been in the French countryside. It was roughly square, with windows all over that hinted at the beauty and treasures within without actually showing anything.

The courtyard itself was wide enough that Taylor could imagine someone parking a semi-trailer in the middle of it with little difficulty. There was no lush grass to greet them -- instead the entire ground was covered in flagstones that looked as though they’d just been torn out of the ocean floor.

Alcoves decorated the insides of the walls of the castle, twenty in all. Two of them, off to her right, had statues. The almost life-size baroque likenesses of Leviathan and the Simurgh stood in just the right way for the sun’s light to glint off their stony faces.

The group paused before the doors of the keep, two slabs of ice so thick that they couldn’t see through them. A pair of handles sat in the middle of the doors, about fifteen feet off the ground.

“That’s convenient,” Vicky said. She took off and flew towards the handles, then wrapped her arms around one and flew backwards. Or she tried. All she earned for herself was a red face as she tried to pull the door back and it refused to budge.

A scaly hand gently grabbed Vicky around the waist and pulled her back, leaving the girl dangling in the grip of a curious Leviathan. {Unit-02 will Open Gate. Host-Aura_Projector Insufficiently Strong.}

Leviathan gently placed Vicky back down right next to her sister and turned to the doors, ignoring the look of restrained and rather petulant fury she gave him. Two massive hands pressed up against the doors, one on each side, and the Endbringer set his feet before shifting his weight forwards.

Leviathan’s arms bulged and his feet dug into the ground before, slowly, the door began to open with a grinding sound like steel on steel.

Cold air whistled out of the keep, ruffling hair and sending shivers down the spines of Taylor’s friends. Leviathan stepped aside, allowing them their first sight of the grand hall.

Taylor walked in, her eyes climbing as her gaze followed one of the columns lining the room to stare up ata ceiling made entirely of stained glass, or something similar enough that it didn’t matter. The light streaming into the hall glowed a faint pink and orange. Most of the light seemed to concentrate on a path leading right down the middle of the hall and to a dais at the far end.

Taylor squealed as she saw what waited for her there.

The throne sat tall and proud in the middle of the dais. Cushions of every colour, to match the pattern of her robes, were pressed into a seat with a back so tall it almost touched the ceiling above. Faces and heads were carved into the block of stone, just barely visible when the light hit them right.

She hopped on the dais, spun on her heel, and flopped down into the throne. With a bit of squirming to make herself comfortable, Taylor found the perfect position and watched as her friends stared around the throne room with mouths agape. Or at least, she wished that was the case.

Her friends were all capes and, apparently, had seen better.

“Not bad,” Cass said as she took it all in with a glance.

Taylor tried not to pout too hard. She was about to suggest that they delve deeper into the castle when a dong sounded out across the hall. “What was that?”

[Doorbell!]

“We have a doorbell?” Taylor asked.

{Affirmative.}

“Huh.” Taylor hopped off her throne and started the long walk to the opposite end of the room. Her friends filed in behind her, all of them a little curious as to who, exactly, was knocking at the gates of the Great Administratorius.  
The world outside the castle proper was surprisingly warm, and Taylor only now realised just how cold it had been in the great hall. All of those thoughts were ripped away as she took in the literal dragon waiting patiently by the gates.

“Dragon?” Taylor asked before taking off at a sprint. “What are you doing here?”

“Hello, Taylor,” Dragon said. “I saw your little castle and thought I would come and say hello. I brought a housewarming gift,” the Canadian Tinker said. “I hope you like cake.”

Taylor and Cass both licked their lips, and their pupils grew wide behind half-lidded eyes. They were eerily in synch for a moment.

“Thanks Dragon. Um, you can come in, if you want. I’m sure even your suit will fit in the great hall, at least. We’re still exploring, so we haven’t found the kitchens yet. But we’ll find plates. I swear it.” Taylor gave the mechanical dragon a quick hug, then looked out past the gates into the Bay proper and towards Brockton Bay itself.

Something shifted.

One moment, Taylor was standing next to Dragon, wondering whether or not to ask Unit Two to make plates out of ice so that she could get to the cake faster, the next she was on a rooftop in the middle of Brockton Bay, blinking at a man in a top hat and domino mask who was grinning at her.

“Hello there,” the man said. “Does this smell like chloroform to you?” he asked.

Taylor’s world went dark.

***

Next time, on How to Train Your Endbringer!

Taylor has a chat about the consequences of kidnapping. Hugs are Given. The world weeps.

Mucho Credits to Vhalidictes and eschwartz and js_za and ChaoticSky!


	28. In Which Director Piggot Educates the Uneducated

In Which Director Piggot Educates the Uneducated

The Director looked over the group gathered in the conference room they’d rented. Every member of the local Protectorate, every single Ward--even Vista who was brought out of containment for the presentation--and even a few of the local parahumans.

New Wave, or at least most of them, were gathered at the back. Parian was knitting off to one side and a few of the unfortunates who had triggered when the Slaughterhouse Nine or Leviathan attacked were milling about looking rather foolish in their cheap costumes.

This meeting was done under the truce, so she politely pretended not to notice Oni Lee and Bakuda slipping into the back, or the members of Accord’s group sitting in a straight-backed posture at the very front.

Piggot coughed into a closed fist. “Hello everyone. Please, find a seat; the presentation is about to begin.”

There was a moment of shuffling and screeching of cheap folding chairs on linoleum tiles before everyone was organized and the room grew silent enough for the Director to continue. “I would like to thank you all for accepting our invitation. I know you probably all have a lot of questions and I hope we will get to them. But first, we will start with a small presentation.”

Piggot walked to the back of a lectern placed just to the side of a canvas tarp. A Tinkertech projector flicked on, bathing the screen in bright lights for just a moment before a title card appeared.

-HOW TO NOT BE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE END OF HUMANITY-  
-0-  
-A PRESENTATION BY THE PARAHUMAN RESPONSE TEAM-

 

The letters were bold and square, the kind of thing not seen since the bomb scares of the Cold War. That was on purpose. The Thinkers the PRT had employed to design the presentation had devised it to be both informative and terrifying. This was just the first step.

Piggot palmed the little device that would allow her to change pages on the presentation. “We gathered you here to talk about the person who might be the single most dangerous parahuman on Earth Bet. Yes. Her current threat rating is greater than Scion’s, or any one of the Endbringers. I am talking, of course, about Queen Administrator.” She flicked a button with her thumb.

The screen behind her shifted. An image appeared of Queen Administrator in the old PRT Headquarters gift shop. She was smiling, her cheeks dimpled and eyes creased as she held up a pair of Legend-branded panties in front of the cape himself. He, on the other hand, had a look of amused horror on his recognizable visage.

The gathered capes laughed, some giggled, others scoffed.

“That, is Queen Administrator,” the Director said. “She is a fifteen- to sixteen-year-old girl with a charming yet ditzy personality. She is friendly, helpful, honest, and usually willing to reason with those who approach her in a calm and rational manner.”

The image changed again. This time it was a video with the kind of quality only Tinkertech could provide. The tiny Dragontech logo in the corner hinted at its origin. It looked like an idyllic scene atop a hill. Just a group of friends out for a picnic. Then the image stopped before the recognizable face of Bonesaw, a bit of cream stuck to the tip of her nose. It panned on to reveal Queen Administrator and Jack Slash, both of them smiling at each other a little ways down the hill.

The audio kicked in a moment later. The idle chatter of the others at the party was muted, allowing the audience to hear Jack Slash and Queen Administrator as if they were right there in the room.

“Mister Jack,” Queen Administrator began. “You know, there are a lot of people that are really afraid of you. But I think they’re a little bit more afraid of me and my friends.”

“We do tr--”

“Shush, Mister Jack, I was talking. Your perspective really changes when you have a precog on your side. You start thinking more about what will be, rather than what is. Your little group have been doing a lot of bad things, Mister Jack. Now, who am I to tell you to stop? Still, it would be mighty nice if you stopped hurting good people and focused a little more on the... not so good people.”

The Jack Slash on screen paused, looking as though he had lost his famous composure.

“And if we don’t want to do that, little miss?”

“Then, perhaps it’s time for your luck to turn, Mister Jack.”

Queen Administrator started walking away and the audio feed picked up one last sentence before the video cut off. “Oh, and Mister Jack. If you ever step foot in my city again, I’ll kill you.”

The capes in the room weren’t smiling any more.

“Queen Administrator is, simply put, not someone in your league,” Piggot said. She almost enjoyed the growing apprehension in the eyes of those gathered before her. “She is the only non-hostile Class-S threat in North America. She occupies the same threat rank as The Sleeper, Nilbog and Glaistig Uaine. She is not affiliated with the Protectorate, PRT, Guild, or any other organization. The President of the United States has a signed declaration in the oval office stating that the city of Brockton Bay is to be surrendered to any sovereign nation with Queen Administrator at its head.”

The room was silent now. That was what she had wanted. They were treating the girl as though she were just another parahuman. They had to learn to curb that response because it would get them all killed.

Piggot jammed her thumb on the button.

The screen made a satisfying click sound as it switched.

-QUESTIONNAIRE-  
-0-  
-WHAT DO YOU DO IF YOU ENCOUNTER QUEEN ADMINISTRATOR IN ANY   
OF THESE SCENARIOS?-

 

The screen flicked after a few seconds, just long enough for her audience to read the prompt. This time it was a cartoon rendering of Queen Administrator walking down the street, a smaller, cuter version of Leviathan trampling after her. It looked like something made in the ‘Duck and Cover’ era.

“We will be asking you a few simple questions, the answers to which will be provided in a multiple-choice style. This is not a test. It is a way of giving you an idea of what to expect from the PRT in terms of help in any given situation.” Piggot pressed the button again.

The Queen Administrator on the screen paused before a building with the word ‘Bank’ above it in huge letters. She tilted her head, then a lightbulb appeared above her. The cartoon cape pointed at the building and her Endbringer gave it a comically telegraphed punch.

When the smoke cleared, the cartoon Queen Administrator hopped into the debris, then came out with a bag with a dollar sign on it.

The screen flashed to a new prompt with the actual question.

-While Out On Patrol, You Encounter QUEEN ADMINISTRATOR   
Robbing A Bank.-

-What Do You Do?-

 

A - Attempt To Arrest her  
B - Attempt To Stop Her  
C - Steal Some Of The Money For Yourself  
D - Ask Her If She Requires Aid Robbing The Establishment

 

The room devolved into snickers again as some of the less mature capes took in the prompt. Piggot had to suppress her own grin, though it was far from a humorous one.

-If You Answered A or B or C...-

-You Are Wrong.-

 

“The PRT,” Piggot began, “does not want to anger Queen Administrator. Every month that passes where the Endbringers are under her control, every year, means literally millions of lives saved.” She grinned like a dog when she saw the dawning comprehension on their faces. “You, no matter how important you think you are, are worth less than another Madison, or Newfoundland, or Switzerland.”

The screen flickered again. This time, the cartoonish Queen Administrator was waving good-bye to her Endbringers before skipping along Main Street USA. People were smiling and waving at the cape as her likeness walked by.

Queen Administrator stopped by a cafe and found a seat, then a waiter appeared to take her order.

The animation paused and a new figure appeared from behind a bush just behind Queen Administrator. He was dressed in all black, with a big knife in his hand and a big bushy mustache on his face. He looked something like Jack Slash’s stereotypical evil twin.

The cartoon figure raised the knife above Queen Administrator’s unsuspecting back.

-This DASTARDLY VILLAIN Is About To Kill QUEEN ADMINISTRATOR.-

-What Will The Consequences Of His Actions Be?-

 

A - He Will Be Praised As A Hero  
B - He Will Be Instantly Killed By One Of Her Endbringers  
C - The Endbringers Will Now Serve Him  
D - The World As We Know It Will End

 

Piggot waited for them to have time to think. “Our Thinkers predict, with 98 percent accuracy, that if Queen Administrator dies her Endbringers will revert to their previous behaviour. We do not know if they will rampage first, if they will go all out and destroy those that killed their new master. What we do know is that this is a possibility.” She pointed towards the screen while pressing on her button.

The image changed to satellite imagery of the Atlantic Ocean before splitting apart. Half the screen showed the ocean from space; the other was a long distance shot of Queen Administrator talking with a clean-up crew.

“This was a few weeks ago. Until then we had a set of concrete numbers and information as to the power of each Endbringer. We obtained that information at the cost of hundreds of lives. Still, it allowed us to estimate the strength of each Endbringer.”

On screen, Queen Administrator made a motion towards Leviathan and the Endbringer moved in what might have been a nod.

The other half showed a sudden motion in the ocean. The tiny hints of waves they could see from so high up stopped, then the currents across the Atlantic shifted. Suddenly, they were all rushing West. Piggot could actually see the water pulling back from the Western shores of Europe.

“That, is footage of the so-called ‘Great Cleaning Tsunami.’ Enough water was displaced to cover the entire continental United States and most of Canada. There was a small but noticeable shift in the planet's rotation. The year is now a few seconds shorter because Queen Administrator wanted the streets of her city power washed.”

She pressed her thumb on the button again.

The screen switched to an animation of the same cartoon Queen Administrator holding a knife over a pentagram. There was a goat tied up in the centre of the circle and the Simurgh and Leviathan were visible off to the side.

-You Come Across This Scene, Where QUEEN ADMINISTRATOR Is Preparing To Sacrifice A Goat To an Elder God.-

-What Do You Say?-

 

A - You Are Under Arrest!  
B - Why Are You Sacrificing A Goat To An Elder God?  
C - Do You Need More Goats?  
D - Can I Help You With That?

 

Piggot was about to click towards the next screen when the doors at the back of the room blasted open and a dishevelled Glory Girl flew in. She took in the dozens of capes staring at her, then looked right at the Director.

Maybe it was the panic in the girl’s eyes, maybe it was the way she looked out of breath. Maybe it was the full-size body pillow with an under-dressed Eidolon clutched to her chest, but something told Piggot that somehow, this was Queen Administrator’s fault.

“Someone just kidnapped Queen Administrator!”

***

(big thank-you to emeralis00 who gave me the original idea for the power-point presentations)

Mucho Credits to Vhalidictes and eschwartz and js_za and ChaoticSky!

Next time, on *How to Train Your Endbringer!*

Taylor dies. The world dies. Piggot Triggers. The story because a Gamer!Isekai fanfiction crossover with Harry Potter and Mad Max. The reader learns not to trust these end-of-story spoilers.


	29. Chapter 29

In Which Taylor Might be Kidnapped

“Is this a kidnapping?” Taylor asked.

She was sitting on a rather plump, if well-worn couch, both hands tied on her lap by a pair of cheap zip-ties while the man in the top hat looked down at her. Mr. Top Hat was sitting across from her, one leg crossed over the other as he lounged back in his own sofa and smoked a cigarette as if there was nothing to worry about.

“Yeah,” he said. “We need your help.”

“Um, no?” Taylor tried.

She saw one eyebrow rise above the domino mask and Mr. Top Hat smothered his cigarette against the arm of his sofa. “Look, it’s nothing big. We’re part of a wandering group of capes called the Travellers. One of our members was hurt some time ago and I think you might be one of our last hopes to heal her.”

Taylor blinked. She looked around the rather plain room but didn’t see anyone else to include in Mr. Top Hat’s ‘our.’ “I do Endbringers. They’re like, the opposite of healing. Also, I need to be home before five or my dad will get worried.”

“Her name’s Noelle,” he continued, as if Taylor hadn’t said anything. “And her powers are killing her.”

“Maybe try a hospital? Oh, oh, or the PRT. They’re really big on the whole heroic helping people thing.”

Mr. Top Hat slammed a fist into the arm of his seat and stood straighter. “Dammit, the woman I love is dying and you’re the only one that can do anything about it. I don’t give a shit about your fucking Endbringer pets, I just want you to make her better!”

Taylor shrank back a little, then tilted her head to one side. “I-I’m sorry? You shouldn’t swear, but I guess you’re really mad about what happened to... Noelle, was it?”

“Of course I’m mad. It’s all that white bitch’s fault, the Simugh made Noelle the way she is.”

[Indignant! Lies... Mostly.]

“I see,” Taylor said. She shifted on the couch a bit, then took in the way Mr. Top Hat was breathing hard and trying to hold back his emotions. She felt bad for him, she really did, but kidnapping her and swearing a lot were both terribly rude and she wanted to distance herself from him. “Well, I’m really sorry, but one of my best friends brought a cake, and as much as my other friends are cool, I don’t think they’ll save me a slice if I don’t get back soon.”

“You think I’ll just let you go?” Top Hat asked.

“I think you don’t have a choice,” Taylor replied gently.

“Fuck that. You’re not leaving until you get that whore to fix Noelle.”

Taylor’s smile dipped a little. “I’d rather you didn’t insult my friends, Mr. Top Hat.”

He sneered at her and flicked the crushed remains of his cigarette away. “Look. Just help her, and I’ll let you be on your merry little way to eat your cake and party with your friends in that ice castle of yours.”

“It’s called the Great Administratorius,” Taylor said. “And it’s awesome. Actually, you should have just gone over there and asked. We do have a doorbell you know. We could have had a nice cup of tea and talked like civilised people.”

Mr. Top Hat got to his feet, reached around his back, and pulled out a handgun. “Get up, we’re going to see Noelle, then you’re going to order that thing to fix her.”

Taylor yawned. “Alright, alright. You’re a real sourpuss, you know.” Standing up, Taylor stretched a little, then fiddled with the zip ties around her wrists. “Can you take these off?”

“No, now start moving.”

Taylor sat back down. “Not until you take these off,” she said, wiggling her wrists at him as she did.

Mr. Top Hat shook, his face going an ugly shade of red as though she’d just embarrassed him somehow. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“Hey, I’m an impressionable young princess. You shouldn’t swear around me. I might pick up bad habits.”

Top Hat made a growly noise at the back of his throat and pointed the gun at Taylor’s head. “Move.”

“Nope.”

Top Hat pointed the gun right into Taylor’s face and she went cross-eyed trying to focus on the hole in the middle of the barret. “Move,” he said.

Taylor sighed. “Levi, knock him out, would you?” she asked.

Top Hat had time to blink once before his whole body spasmed and his eyes rolled back into his skull. He landed with a thump, the gun clattering on the floor next to him.

Standing, Taylor looked around the room for something to cut the zip-ties off. It was a really, really plain area, with only the two couches, a few other chairs, and a big screen TV off on another wall. There were no tables or other furniture and only cement-grey walls except for a heavy door off to one side.

Seeing nothing that could help her, Taylor walked over to the door and opened it with some awkward twisting of her body to undo the catch, then she rolled her eyes at her own silliness. “Simmy, the zip ties, please?” she asked.

The ties made a snapping sound as they fell apart.

Now free to explore, Taylor allowed a grin to grow on her face and stepped out into a corridor of grey walls and steel-grated floors. It ran to her left and right, dotted along the way with closed doors just like the one she’d walked out of.

“Ennie, meanie, miny, moe,” Taylor sang. Her second ‘moe’ finished with her pointing off to her right.

She skipped along. Eventually the corridor led to what she at first thought was a dead-end. Then she noticed the wheel in the middle of the wall and realised that it was a door, a huge vault door like what she’d seen in bank-heist movies.

If this was some sort of bunker or hidden base, then the most likely way out of here was probably through there. With a grunt of effort, Taylor pushed against the wheel and felt it give with a sudden lurch.

The wheel spun and something within the great door clunked. Suddenly, the door felt much lighter, though it was still a thick slab of steel.

“Don’t!” someone called from behind her.

Taylor paused and slowly turned to take in a blonde girl with bright baby blue eyes who was staring right back at her. “Hi?” Taylor said.

“Queen Administrator?” the girl asked. Her hands were near her chest, as if she hadn’t decided if she wanted to squeeze them together or get ready for a fight yet.

“That’s me. Pleased to meet you... um, are you one of my kidnappers?”

“What?”

“I’ll take that as a maybe,” Taylor said. “So, why shouldn’t I just leave?” She pointed to the vault door.

“That’s not the exit, that’s Noelle’s room,” the girl said. “Uh, how did you get in here?”

“I told you, I was kidnapped. Right before I got to eat cake too.”

“Kidnapped by whom?” the girl looked like someone who knew the answer to a question but didn’t want to hear it.

Taylor shrugged. “Some grumpy guy with a top hat. Leviathan knocked him out and I left him somewhere that way.” She waved in the rough direction from which she’d come.

It was as if a great weight had landed on the girl’s shoulders. “Oh, Krouse,” she said under her breath. She looked up again, something like pity mixed with fear in her eyes. “I’m so sorry. That’s... it’s very much like him to do something like that, actually. I just wish he’d told us so that we could convince him not to.”

Taylor nodded. “Yeah. I was just hanging out with my friends when he grabbed me. It was rather rude.” She frowned, then turned back to the vault door that was noticeably unlocked. “So, Noelle is in there?” she asked.

“I- I wouldn’t go in,” the girl advised. “Noelle is... hurt. And she can be kind of mean when she’s not feeling well.” She held her hands together over her chest, eyes wide as they twitched from Taylor to the vault door.

“What happened to her, really?”

The girl hesitated. “I guess you of all people might understand,” she finally said. “We were in Madison, when the Simurgh hit.”

[Not Bombs, just Surprises.]

Taylor nodded. “Simmy says that you’re not one of her bombs, just a surprise.”

The girl froze, her breath catching. “Oh. She... can hear us?”

“She can hear pretty much anyone anywhere,” Taylor said. “Anyway, Noelle.”

“R-right. Noelle changed, her powers made her grow bigger, into, into a monster. She’s still her, but the monster is always there and it’s always hungry. We’ve been looking for a way to bring her back, Kr-Trickster, that is, the guy who kidnapped you, most of all. They were close. A couple, before she changed. They still love each other, but it hurts him to see her the way she is.” The girl hugged herself. “I shouldn’t have told you all of that, I’m sorry. The exit is just over there, I can show you it.”

“No,” Taylor said. “I want to meet Noelle first.” There was something about the girl turned monster that had her curious; the way this other girl spoke of her made her sound like a nice person who had gotten the short end of the stick. And they were still looking for a way to help. That spoke of the kind of friendship that appealed to Taylor on a base level.

“It, it might be dangerous,” the girl said.

Taylor grinned. “I can be sorta dangerous too!”

“I guess,” the girl said. “My name’s Mars, by the way. Or Sundancer, I guess.”

Taylor’s smile softened a little. “And I’m Queen Administrator, but you already knew that. My friends call me Taylor.”

“Thank you, Taylor,” Mars said, trying out the name. “Do you still want to see Noelle?”

“Yeah, I think I’d like that. Oh, and maybe after we can all go for cake.” Taylor’s eyes narrowed dangerously. “Unless my other friends already ate it all.”

Mars didn’t seem to notice the venom in Taylor’s voice. “Let me go in first. Noelle knows me, and I can take care of myself if the monster tries anything.”

Mars waited for Taylor to back away from the vault, then, with a grace that Taylor couldn’t hope to emulate, she slid past, got on the tip of her toes, and grabbed the door while swinging her body back to give it a firm yank.

With a dull hiss of well-oiled hinges, the vault opened up just wide enough for someone to step in. “Hello?” a voice rang out of the interior. It was a woman’s voice, though soft and uncertain. “Francis?”

‘Noelle, it’s me,” Mars said.

“Oh, hey,” the voice, Noelle, replied.

“I, uh,” Mars paused, then looked at Taylor. “I brought a friend. She wanted to meet you.”

“I, I don’t know,” Noelle said. “Can she, can she help?”

“Maybe?”

“Oh.” There was a note of hope in Noelle’s voice now. “I’d like to see her too, then.”

Taking the cue for what it was, Taylor walked past Mars and into the room beyond the vault doors. It was rather spacious, with soothing blue paint on the walls and some plush carpeting on the ground near the doorway. The furniture, little that there was, was nice and clean and looked rather expensive. Still, none of that hid the fact that they were in what was essentially a cell.

Taylor took it all in with a sweep of her gaze across the room, then she focused on the woman in its centre. She gasped and Noelle flinched. “You’re so pretty!”

There was a moment of shocked awe as both Noelle and Mars stared at Taylor. She, on the other hand, was looking at the size of the girl before her. Noelle was huge, easily on par with Ned and she had delicate tentacles and dozens of fetchingly huge mouths all over, all of them drooling cutely on the floor.

Taylor started clapping. “Aww, you’re so adorable! Hi Noelle, I’m Taylor!”

“You’re Queen Administrator,” Noelle said, almost as if she was hoping that it would be enough to restore some normalcy to the conversation.

“That’s me!” Taylor said. She walked a bit closer to Noelle, a huge grin splitting your features. “Mr. Top Hat didn’t say that you were so friendly. I might not have minded him kidnapping me so much if he had.”

“What?”

“So, Mars said that there was something wrong with your powers?”

“I, um, yes,” Noelle said. She gestured down at her bulk. “They turned me into, into this.”

“Uh huh,” Taylor said. “And what’s the problem?”

Noelle blinked. Mars blinked. Taylor waited.

“The problem is that I’m like this now. I’m always hungry, my body isn’t mine anymore. I... I hurt people.” Noelle said.

Taylor shook her head. “But you’re very pretty,” she said. “I guess it might be annoying though.” Taylor allowed a frown to crease her forehead. “Okay. I’ll ask Levi if he can help, since he’s good with organic stuff. And Simmy could maybe make a doohickey to help too.”

[Unit-03 does not make ‘Doohickies.’ Unit-03 is an Artiste.]

“That would be wonderful,” Noelle said. There were hopeful tears gathering at the edges of all of her eyes. 

“Oh, and then you can come and visit my castle too! And we can have tea! It’ll be a party.” Taylor threw herself forwards, arms extended to hug Noelle.

Too late she heard the screams of both girls.

Taylor had time to press herself close to Noelle’s side before the girl shoved her back. She stumbled a bit, but stayed on her feet with eyes wide and mouth agape. For a moment, the only thought in Taylor’s mind was the pain of having her hug rejected. Then she heard a slurping noise that drew her attention away.

Noelle’s face twisted in what might have been pain. She cried out, a wordless howl that rang across the room before something splattered out from her naked lower half.

Taylor had once seen a video of a cow giving birth. Her mind flashed back to that for a moment as a naked, skin-coloured thing flopped out from Noelle and splattered to the ground. Then the thing turned and Taylor was looking into a malformed version of her own face.

The mutant Taylor gasped, both arms--one of which was too short by a foot--reaching out as though to hug the air. “Haha!” it screamed. “Kill! Help me! Kill Everything!”

***

Next Time, on How to Train Your Endbringer!

Taylor explodes. Dragon worries. New friends are made. Taylor plans to open a tanning salon.

Mucho Credits to Vhalidictes and eschwartz and js_za and ChaoticSky!


	30. Chapter 30

The Canary in the Mine Shaft

 

***

Paige Mcabee’s life had taken a turn for the worse, then a turn for the horrible, and now it was twisted into a bizarre parody of all things normal.

She was in the Birdcage, surrounded every hour of every day by psychopaths, murderers, rapists and worse scum. A few months ago she would have been only mildly interested in hearing that everyone in the cage had died. Now she was one of them.

Her visit had started about as badly as could have been hoped. Lustrum had welcomed her into the fold and Paige did what she could to make herself small and unnoticeable. A few subtle uses of her power, something she would never have done prior to entering the Birdcage, were enough to tell some of the pushier girls that she didn’t swing that way. And so she had tried to develop a routine, a routine that if she was lucky would stay with her until she eventually died inside the grey walls of the Birdcage.

It left her with a lot of time to think, a lot of time to curse the vial that she drank and the joy she’d felt when entire crowds cheered her on.

Then, one day while brooding in a corner of the common room, a young woman stopped by her.

When she looked up it was see the cape who was, perhaps, the most dangerous inhabitant of the Birdcage. The Faerie Queen tilted her head to one side, then the other, as if inspecting a strange insect that had crawled onto her path. “You are the Singing Faerie, yes?”

“I, I’m Canary,” she had said. “Paige, I mean.”

The Faerie Queen nodded. She was sipping at a mug of warm tea, the scent of it wafting through the common room and turning a few heads. Heads that would turn right back around when they saw who it was. No one messed with Glaistig Uaine, not unless they wanted to join her faerie court.

“Yes, you are the Singing Faerie. You sing and your song wraps around ears and minds. So many pretty noises to fill hearts and souls with happiness and dread. My fairies can sing too,” she said before gesturing at one of the ghostly apparitions floating behind her. It was a woman, face shrouded in shadow. The ghost, the faerie, let out a low hum. “They do not sing well, and they sing only for me. Come, Singing Faerie, I would have you perform in my court.”

Paige didn’t know what happened after that. She was too far from the little political games that were played in the cage, but soon enough Lustrum told her that from then on she would be living in the Faerie court, and that if she ran, it would be best if she ran to another block.

She sang every night after the Faerie Queen ate her supper and every morning while the members of her block broke their fast. The Faerie Queen was, at her core, a delusional young woman only half a step away from insanity. At least, that’s how Paige saw it. She still knew that the girl was queen of the block and feared in every other.

She waited in her corner, hoping that what she did was enough to be left alone. One day, she dreamed, one day she would be let out of the cage and the Canary would fly again.

Perhaps she was spending too much time around Glaistig Uaine if her mind was filling with tripe metaphors.

***

“Everyone, gather ‘round, for from beyond the bars come tidings both grim and joyous!” The Faerie Queen’s call ran across her court and the other parahumans that she allowed to live in her hallowed halls stood to attention.

Paige had been reading from an old book about Gaelic lore and Arthurian Legends. A dry, rather dull book, but one that was filled with stories about fairies and kings and royal courts. If she was going to sing new songs she was going to have to write them herself, and she didn’t want the Faerie Queen’s ire because she messed up some old legend in a verse.

She earmarked a corner of the page she was on and placed the book on the table before standing up to join the small group gathering around the Faerie Queen’s throne. It was a strange seat, made of crystal with precious gems the size of Paige’s fist planted here and there across its surface.

Glaistig took her seat and stared at the dozen or so who gathered to listen to her speak. Her block was just as big as most others but had the smallest population. It was actually quite spacious.

In the time that Paige had been there, only one group of a half-dozen parahumans had tried to take it. She thought she recognized one of Glaistig’s ghosts as the leader of that little assault.

The Faerie Queen smiled and instantly Paige’s attention snapped to her. “Whispers have reached my ears and not even the bars of this gilded cage could stop the good tidings. A new Queen has been born and she roams the outside, calling it her own.”

Paige swallowed. A new queen meant someone like Glaistig, if she wasn’t missing her mark. Another cape like her was roaming the world and probably ruining it for everyone.

“Her name, as the whispers have told me, is Queen Administrator, and she rules over her twin subjects in the city of Brockton by the Bay.”

So, a cape like the Faerie Queen with only two ghosts? Canary never spent much time studying powers, but she supposed that a similar power was possible.

“Whatfore shall we do, your majesty?” one of the capes gathered nearby said. He was one of the simpering fools, the sort that played up the whole royalty and faerie side of things to ingratiate himself with the Faerie Queen. Paige gave him a few more weeks before the Queen tired of his ass kissing.

Glaistig pondered the question for a few long moments, her eyes darting to her ghosts, then to the ceiling. “I believe we ought to deliver a present, a token of our appreciation to the new Royal. Yes, we should remind her that we exist, that the Faerie Queen’s realm competes with her own, but also that we are not unfriendly. Perhaps we can open an exchange of favours. The outside of the cage begins to look more and more appealing. The High Priest has lost some puppets, the world is shaking up, and Father’s sadness wanes.”

The Faerie Queen jumped to her feet and scanned the group before her. There was something manic in her eyes. “We leave at dusk.”

***

Another interlude. That makes two in one week. I’m sorry that this chapter’s not all about Taylor, but I wanted to show some other perspectives and drop some hints about future events. We should be back to our regular programming on Monday morning!

I also wanted to take the opportunity to thank the following people for their support!


	31. Chapter 31

In Which Taylor’s Evil Twin Summons A Monster

Taylor was, at one time, used to being afraid. Every morning when she’d wake up to go to school it was with a pit gnawing at her stomach. Every time her dad asked her if she was doing okay. Every time she’d see Emma, or Sophia, or Madison while minding her own business.

She had only just started to get used to the idea that she didn’t need to be afraid for herself anymore, that she had people, friends, that she could rely on to keep her safe.

“...Kill! Help me! Kill Everything!”

Five words that made her breath catch, that had her blood running cold and that rooted her feet to the ground. It wasn’t the fear of dying. No, that was too alien a concept. It was the betrayal, the thought that Simmy and Levi would turn on her because of a simple mistake.

[Soothing,] came the Simurgh’s voice. It was softer than usual, almost apologetic in a way that Taylor had never heard before. [Will not Kill Host-Queen_Administrator. Will Never Hurt Best Friend Host-Queen_Administrator.]

“Oh,” Taylor said.

[False-Host-Queen_Administrator’s Powers do not extend to Units-02 to 20. Range is Larger. Bandwidth is Smaller.]

Taylor’s knees almost let out, and it was only Mars catching her that kept her up. “Oh, that’s, okay, that’s good.”

{Affirmative. Unit-02 Serves the Primary Directive. Will Protect Host-Queen_Administrator. Eliminate False-Host-Queen_Administrator?}

“I think that might be for the best,” Taylor said while turning back to her warped clone. Noelle had backed away from the naked caricature and was holding both hands near her mouth as if ashamed of what she’d done.

Something tickled in the back of Taylor’s mind and she replayed what Unit Three had said. “Wait, she can’t control you guys, but you didn’t say anything about Unit One.”

The vault started to rumble and the clone started to cackle. “He’s coming. He’s coming and he’s going to burn you!”

***

Dragon was worried.

Actually, now that she had a few bytes of spare processing power, she knew that ‘worried’ wasn’t quite the word that described the emotional state she could most closely empathize with.

Maybe anxious, bothered, concerned, distraught, edgy, fretful or a handful of other words would best describe her current state.

She couldn’t quite pin the exact emotion and that just added more to the long list of things bothering her. She paused for a microsecond, trying to rewind the events of the day to find out exactly where and when and why she felt the way she did.

The morning had been routine. Her new software that kept track of Queen Administrator the same way she tracked the other Class-S threats was working a whole 20% of the time. Writing a script that just asked the Simurgh’s PHO account what they were up to every half-hour instead of trying to track the girl via more traditional means was pure genius.

She had tried satellite imagery (the satellites always went off-course), street cameras (that always had bird feces on them at inopportune times), and high-flying unmanned drones (that had the uncanny tendency to get hit by swallows and, in one bizarre case, a coconut).

The rest of the day had been fairly quiet. A few posts on PHO showed Queen Administrator eating lunch with the Dallon sisters and the former supervillain Rune at an Italian restaurant. Dragon’s attention had shifted to the presentation being held by Director Piggot.

Then every seismic alert system on the East Coast had twitched, a few alarms had gone off on the Rig, and someone posted a video of a shape-shifting building moving in the waters of the Bay that reportedly gave people headaches. She had set her moderation routines to cleaning the footage off the internet while keeping a copy to study at a later date.

She had been worried that something was going to attack the Bay, perhaps one of the other Endbringers that Queen Administrator had mentioned, or some over-eager parahuman that didn’t get the memo that Brockton Bay was not to be messed with.

Then she caught sight of the frankly beautiful castle a kilometer out into the Bay and Queen Administrator and her friends walking and skipping towards its front gate on a bridge of what looked like ice.

She did a quick Google search of appropriate ways of meeting someone in a newly built domicile and then fired up her new Dragontech Mobile Bakery Mark Two and started baking a cake.

The plan was simple and had been drafted even before the communications from the directors of the PRT came in. She was going to visit Taylor, give her some cake, take some readings on her castle, and try to make sure the girl didn’t get into any more trouble than usual.

Perhaps less trouble than usual.

She had dedicated a cycle to searching any laws that Taylor had broken today and adding them to the growing list.

To say that she was happy that Taylor greeted her with a hug would be an understatement. Before meeting Taylor there had been perhaps two people that she had grown fond of. Colin, the ever terse Tinker, Narwhal, who was always willing to listen, and now Taylor, who seemed to approach life with so much enthusiasm and good cheer that it warmed her core processor.

She knew that if Taylor ever found out about her less-than-human heritage that she would probably only think it was cool and would go right on being Dragon’s... friend.

Then Taylor was replaced by a sand-filled Eidolon body pillow.

Her mind froze for a cycle and she needed a poke from Protocol Forty-Two ‘Don’t Panic’ to start analysing the situation.

It took a half second to narrow down the list of possible culprits to a dozen, then a half second more to find the most likely candidate from that list. Two more seconds passed before she had more information about Francis ‘Trickster’ Krouse than was perhaps legally appropriate to have on hand.

“What just happened?” Amy Dallon asked.

“Fuck,” was Cass’s rather appropriate reaction.

Dragon, who was perhaps a little faster to react than most humans, was already doing everything she could to track Taylor down. She had also planted horrible things in Trickster’s search history, locked down all his bank accounts, and modified his credit score until he wouldn’t be able to get a loan for a scoop of ice cream. It was all perfectly legal of course. Kinda. She hadn’t lied to Taylor when she said she could serve as a lawyer.

The AI snapped back to the moment. “Victoria,” her still somewhat-synthetic voice said. “I need you to go to the address displayed on your phone. You’ll find Director Piggot, the Protectorate, Wards, and most of your family there. Tell them that Taylor was taken.”

“Got it!” Glory Girl said. She was off like a shot, heading towards the city even while pulling her phone out. She was holding the body pillow that Taylor had been switched with when she flew away, but Dragon didn’t have the inclination or time to stop her.

“What about us?” Amy asked.

“Panacea, could you stay here?” Dragon asked. “If Taylor gets hurt having you ready to help her would be invaluable. Cass, I’m afraid we won’t need your powers unless search and rescue is required.”

The girl didn’t seem disappointed in that. In fact, she just rolled her eyes at Dragon. “Man, you government types always forget the obvious,” she said.

Dragon really, really wanted to tell her that it wasn’t the time for her sass.

“Hey!” Cass screamed. “Simmy, Levi, where’s your master at?”

Dragon’s programming stuttered. She... really hadn’t thought of that.

“Uh huh,” Cass said as she watched the Simurgh mime in the air.

First, she made a gesture with five fingers, then the Endbringer flipped upside down before making waving motions with both hands. Her face screwed up in concentration and she flipped back around before shaping an ‘O’ with one hand, then inserting her other hand’s index finger into it a few times.

Dragon had some of the world’s best decoding, body language, and cryptographic systems trying to decipher the message.

“You... are taking the piss, aren’t you?” Cass asked.

The Simurgh grinned and nodded.

Cass sighed. “Taylor’s fine,” she told Dragon. “Simmy might be a raging bitch but she wouldn’t let Taylor get hurt. They have too much fun messing with people. She’s probably giving whoever kidnapped her the time of his life and will be back in a few minutes wondering if we left her a slice of cake.”

There was an explosion in the middle of the city.

“Or not,” Cass admitted.

***

Taylor stared at the Endbringer that had torn its way out of the ground. He was huge and dark and perhaps one of the most imposing living things she had ever seen. Black, obsidian-like horns grew out of his head around a single eye that glowed like a pit of molten lava while arms the size of semi-trailers plowed into the ground around them.

Taylor had to cut her inspection short as a rain of debris started to crash next to her. Cement and rebar thudded around her, what was left of the base she had been sequestered into falling apart as Behemoth rose.

“Kill them! Kill her!” Taylor’s clone screamed.

Behemoth’s voice rang into Taylor’s head like the gentle tappings of a jackhammer being wielded by an angry Alexandria.

“No!” Taylor said. “Unit One, don’t kill me. Actually, don’t kill anyone.”

Behemoth turned his one eye towards Taylor.

 

“Yes! I mean, no! Kill Taylor!” Taylor’s evil clone said.

Taylor spared a glance off to the side. Mars and Noelle were nearby, both of them wide eyed and staring at the massive Endbringer in their midst. Meanwhile, the linoleum tiles around them were starting to peel and crack under the constant heat pouring off Behemoth.

She figured that Leviathan was keeping her cool, because otherwise she might have baked being so close to Unit One. “Don’t listen to her. She’s an evil clone!” Taylor said.

 

Behemoth’s head was twitching from one Taylor to the other like a confused puppy.

“Hey, Noelle, how long do your clone thingies usually last? Um, I mean, do I have to buy a bunk bed now or something?”

Noelle made a noise that might have been an answer, but Taylor didn’t speak squeak. Obviously, the girl was terrified, her every eye on the Endbringer towering above them.

“Oh, don’t be afraid,” Taylor said. “Look at him, he wouldn’t hurt a kitten.”

 

“No, no, let’s not do that until Amy makes her crown.” Taylor really wanted to pinch the bridge of her nose, or maybe just go home and eat some ice cream, but she had to deal with this. It was her duty as princess. “Okay, Behemoth, what do you want?”

 

“Yeah. Unit Two wants to play with water and follow his directives. He’s like, um, a really focused boy with a hobby. And Simmy, uh, Unit Three, is more about being free and doing her own thing. Like a... well, like a rebellious teen.”

[Smug.]

Behemoth accentuated the statement by banging a foot on the ground, sending a ripple through the earth that could probably be felt across the city.

“That’s great!” Taylor said.

“You can help by killing her!” the clone said.

“That wouldn’t help!” Taylor yelled before Behemoth did something she would regret. “Actually, you know what would help?” Taylor narrowed her eyes at her clone. At first, she’d wanted to befriend the girl, maybe get Amy to fix her a little, but she seemed really bent on the whole ‘kill Taylor’ thing. “Simmy, Levi, could you--” Taylor said, then waved at the clone.

Clone Taylor exploded.

Taylor stared at the bits of meat that had, seconds ago, looked a lot like her. “Uh,” she said.

Mars went off to a corner where she could empty her stomach in peace.

“I meant, knock her out, or something.”

{False-Host-Queen_Administrator was a Threat to Host-Queen_Administrator. Followed Primary Directive.}

[Apologies!]

“Oh, well, that was... something,” Taylor said. “And here I wanted a sister.”

[Can help!]

“Ah, well, I think one clone is enough,” Taylor said.

[Mini-Host-Queen_Administrators? Excited! Will find Suitable Mate for Host-Queen_Adminstrator.]

Taylor hoped that everyone would think that it was Behemoth’s killing field that was giving her face a healthy flush. “That, um, well.” She coughed. “Anyway! Unit One, I’m sure we can find things that you can help with! And it won’t even have to be every six months!”

 

“T-there are other ways of helping,” Taylor said. “You could, um, warm people? And, maybe... uh.” She tried to think of all the things Behemoth was good at. Mostly, those were burning people, frying people, stomping on people, stomping on cities, burning cities, and killing cities. She was starting to see a pattern. “Okay, wait, just... give me a whole minute, please?”

 

Taylor nodded at him, then pulled out her phone. She dialed Dragon’s number, wondering why the Tinker hadn't called her yet. Then she noticed the seventy-eight missed calls and hundreds of messages. Feeling a little sheepish, Taylor dialed.

“Taylor!” Dragon’s voice shouted from the line before it even rang once. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine!” Taylor said. “Um, mostly. I’m trying to convince Unit One, er, Behemoth, not to Endbringer-ify the city, and I could use your help. Also, hi, how are you?”

“I’m well, Taylor, much better now that I know you’re safe. Your other friends are here with me. They’re worried too.”

“Great. So, about the helping thing?”

“Yes, of course. I’ve been looking online for ideas and, well, there aren’t all that many ideas for what to do with a... helpful Behemoth, I’m afraid. Using him as a reactor or as an emergency responder are the only non-ludicrous ones.”

“Emergency... that’s a great idea! Hey, do you think the Protectorate would allow Behemoth in their ranks?” The more she thought about it the better it sounded.

“I think that that might not be the best idea. The Protectorate is part of the PRT, which in turn is part of the government of the United States. That would be like giving a single nation access to a very powerful weapon of mass destruction.”

“Oh... well, that makes things more complicated.”

 

“Uh, yeah, big guy, just, we’re trying to see how you’d best be able to help.”

Behemoth’s one eye narrowed a little, then he looked out towards the city. 

“No, see, burning down the city would probably be the opposite of what we want.” Taylor frowned a bit. “So, uh, how are you helping now?”

 

“I could override that primary directive of yours, like I did for Unit Two and Unit Three?” Taylor held her phone a little closer. Sure, Dragon could only hear one side of the conversation, but she was smart, and probably one of the few adults Taylor was willing to trust with something so important.

 

“Oh, well, shucks.”

“What’s the primary directive?” Noelle asked, sounding very shy for a ten-foot-tall monster girl.

“It’s the thing that tells them to go around and kill people every three months or so,” Taylor explained. “My other friends were okay with me overriding that order and replacing it, but he, uh, thinks that he’s being helpful, which is what he wants.”

“He thinks that destroying millions of people is helpful?” Mars whispered.

Behemoth must have heard because he focused on her and the girl almost wilted under the gaze of his one eye. 

“Well, I suppose you’re helping someone,” Taylor said. “But most of us would see, um, attacking cities every few months as the opposite of helping.”

 

Taylor imitated a fish for a moment. Behemoth wanted to help, that much was very clear, but she had no idea how he could help anyone, and that was just sad. So far, her thoughts revolved around him keeping food warm and that might have been a task for a microwave and not a thirty-foot-tall city destroying machine.

She looked down at her hands, opening and closing them by her side while Behemoth’s warmth played against her skin. At the rate they were going, she would develop a nice tan.

Taylor blinked.

“I know how you can help!”

 

“Dragon!”

“Yes Taylor?” Dragon replied.

“I need a loan to build a tanning house.”

“What?” The response came at the same time from Mars, Noelle and Dragon, the three of them perfectly in synch.

“It makes perfect sense!” Taylor crowed. She skipped closer to Behemoth and over the mangled bone-bits of her clone. “Okay, so, you can do things with energy, right?”

 

“Yes, exactly. Unit One, I want to give you a new directive: burn people alive!”

***

Yuck. I’m really not happy with how this chapter turned out. I’m glad that it’s being posted after so much back and forth, but it just... gah. OH well, now that this event’s out of the way, we can move onto some of the chapters I’ve been getting really excited about!

Next Time, on How to Train Your Endbringer!

Lisa visits a bar.

Mucho Credits to Vhalidictes and eschwartz and js_za and ChaoticSky!


	32. Chapter 32

In Which Lisa Goes to a Human Establishment

***

The door to Sabah’s shop burst open and the girl in question shot up, her full attention snapping towards the entrance. Her mind went to dark places first. Was it the Empire here to recruit? Or something worse, like the Teeth or Slaughterhouse Nine?

Soon, though, those fears were laid to rest, only to be replaced by far more visceral ones.

Queen Administrator stood in the doorway, eyes wide and a huge grin on her face. Next to her, a petite blonde woman stood, blue eyes scanning the shop. Cute, Sabah thought for just a second before her brain got into gear.

“Queen Administrator?” she asked while trying to stand tall in her Parian costume.

“Parian, it’s an emergency,” the strongest cape in the Bay said. “I need a chef’s hat. And a giant apron.”

***

Lisa snapped her flip-phone closed with a satisfactory click. The boss sounded distinctly uncomfortable and a little rushed, almost as if he was worried. Is worried. Queen Administrator is a threat. Fears Queen Administrator. Respects Queen Administrator. Tried to kill Queen Administrator, failed.

Lisa’s grin only grew as she shuffled off her bed and put her laptop aside--the internet was finally restored across most of the Bay--and slid on a pair of running shoes before exiting her room. “Brian!” she called out.

The older boy was squaring off against a punching bag off to one side. Isn’t paying attention. Is watching Alec play. Wants to play too. Thinks it will make him look childish. Lisa cut off that train of thought before it went in circles. “Hey, Brian, we’ve got something of a mission from the boss-man.”

That finally got his attention. “What sort of mission?”

“Nothing complicated. Just a bit of scouting, maybe some talking. Mostly I could use the backup if things go wrong.” She started searching for a jacket. It was a bit misty outside, even if the sun still shone above.

“Hey, why aren’t you asking me?” Alec asked from his spot on the couch. She wasn’t the only one rejoicing in the return of the internet. He was playing some team-based first person shooter that, apparently, featured a gorilla as a protagonist. Not a gorilla, a scientist. She blinked and shut that off too.

“Because we’re going to be close to Queen Administrator and I can’t imagine you being mature enough to not use your power on her. I don’t want to have to explain to the boss why you were turned into a smear by Leviathan.”

Alec paused at that, until his character on-screen was shot in the head by a purple woman. Is French. “Yeah, okay. Bring back food.”

“Sure. Brian, you ready to go?” she turned to ask. He was slipping on a leather jacket, a deep brown instead of the black that he wore as Grue. “I see that you are. You’re driving.”

He made a grunting sound that she didn’t need to use her power to recognize as approval before they both headed out. The van they’d been using recently was parked out back and the two of them slipped in before Brian took off.

“We’re not taking Rachel? Or Aisha?” Brian asked after a minute. She was pointing in the general direction they were going.

“Rachel isn’t exactly subtle. She does actually get along with Queen Administrator though. And Aisha is... well.”

“I’m what?”

Brian swore under his breath, the van swerving into the other lane before he yanked it back, sending all the junk in the car flying for a moment before he regained control.

Lisa spun around to glare at Aisha. The black girl just smiled back, looking rather sheepish. Was there all along. Curious. Wants to use power. Worried about being left out.

“No,” Lisa said.

“No what?”

“You are not going to spy on Queen Administrator,” Lisa said. She narrowed her eyes at Aisha, trying to get the message across.

The teenager rolled her eyes. “C’mon, even I know better than to mess with Endbringer girl.” Totally wants to mess with Endbringer girl.

“Aisha,” Brian said, a warning tone in his voice. He’d caught on too.

Lisa sighed. “I won’t stop you from coming, mostly because I can’t. But keep your power off and do, not, mess, with, the, Simurgh.”

One of Aisha’s eyebrows quirked. “Just the Simurgh?”

“Leviathan would just tear the water out of your body. You’ll just die pretty much instantly,” Lisa said and she enjoyed the quickly-hidden look of terror that flitted across Aisha’s face. “The Simurgh wouldn’t kill you. She like playing with her food. She’d make it last and return whatever you did tenfold. If you embarrass Queen Administrator, then she’ll make it so that you pee yourself in public, or that Brain walks in on you and Alec making out, or something far more embarrassing. The problem is...”

Lisa continued over Brian’s sounds of protest. “The problem is, that the Simurgh doesn’t know how much is too much. She’s got no concept of equivalent revenge. She’ll make the rest of your life a nightmare just for one prank.” She let her power loose, just a little. Is nervous about Queen Administrator. Mildly afraid. More worried about peeing herself than being caught with Alec. Already made out with Alec once. Got to third-- Lisa cut that train of thought off fast. Will behave. Mostly. Well, she couldn’t ask for miracles.

“What was that about making out with Alec?” Brian demanded.

“Turn over here,” Lisa replied, pointing to one of the narrow streets just off the Boardwalk. “We can park and walk the rest of the way.”

“Lisa,” Brian said, turning that same warning tone onto her.

“Yeah, just park right there,” she said while suppressing a grin.

Brain grumbled a bit, but he did as she asked and soon enough all three of them were out of the van and looking around. The spot they’d parked in was off the Boardwalk a ways, one of the bigger parking areas that allowed people to walk to the Boardwalk proper.

There were a surprisingly large number of cars parked around. Crowd gathering for event. 

“C’mon,” she said. “Let’s go see what the Queen’s up to now.”

Lisa was leading the way when Aisha perked up behind her. “You’ve met her, right?”

“Queen Administrator?” Lisa asked. “Yeah, once.”

“What’s she like?”

Lisa actually pondered that for a second. “She’s insane. And smart. I think her powers did something to her, like what Bitch’s powers did to Rachel.”

“Damn,” Brian said, summing up the situation rather nicely.

“Yeah. Her little Endbringer friends probably don’t help. I think they make her feel... safe, I guess.”

Aisha snorted. “Oh no, the only thing protecting me are these two massive monsters that absolutely everyone is terrified of. Guess I’m fucked.”

Lisa turned her head towards the girl so that she could see her face, then rolled her eyes. “Don’t joke too much. Queen Admin is actually really nice for a girl with WMDs as pets. She could be much, much worse.”

Aisha made a noise that might have been an agreement, but before Lisa could really start hammering in the warning, they turned onto the main street of the Boardwalk and came to a slow stop.

A crowd was gathered there, people of all ages and ethnicities, which was bizarre in and of itself in Brockton Bay. Hundreds of cell phones were pointing out towards the Bay where Queen Administrator’s castle rested in slowly lapping waters like something out of a fantasy movie. That was capturing some attention. The novelty of a castle in the Bay had yet to wear off and probably wouldn’t for a few months yet.

What was more attention-grabbing was the massive shop jutting out of the waters right next to the Boardwalk, a huge edifice of black stone and sharp angles.

Lisa blnked at the sign dangling on the front, a large sheet of paper inexpertly painted on and held in place with what she quickly identified as duct-tape. Queen Administrator made the sign, her power helpfully explained.

‘Behemoth’s Tanning Salon and Grill Bar!’

The three of them stared.

Name isn’t what Queen Administrator wanted. Queen Administrator isn’t allowed to name things. Someone told Queen Administrator call it that. Queen Administrator wanted to call it the ‘Human Grilling Shop.’

Lisa shook her head and tried to ignore the needle of pain that shot through her skull.

 

She took in a deep breath, then let it out. She was here for a reason, she could focus on that first. The crowds were gathering close to the shop, but were still keeping a respectful distance from the front doors. Are cautious, her powers unhelpfully added.

Pulling Brian along by the wrist and trusting that Aisha would follow, Lisa slid through the crowd until they were at the very front, near the invisible line that people were afraid to cross. From there, Lisa could take in the front of the store in all its macabre beauty.

Two huge transparent panels, made of a dark, nearly stone-like material, wrapped around the front, hinting at what was within without showing it. A pair of doors were in the centre, one of them nearly fifteen feet tall next to a smaller, more human-sized door. Someone was lingering just on the other side of the door, their shadow shifting on the obsidian wall.

Queen Administrator. Waiting for clients. Is anxious for someone to show up.

Lisa closed her eyes. She was going to regret this. She was going to regret this so hard. “We need to go in there,” she said.

Brian looked at her, a flat look that she didn’t need her powers to translate as ‘are you shitting me?’

“Yes, I’m serious,” she replied. “We won’t be able to scout the place out from out here. I’m pretty sure we won’t be hurt if we go in there.”

“Pretty sure, huh?” Aisha said.

“Pretty sure,” Lisa replied. “Look, if it’s too... weird, we just need to politely tell Queen Administrator that we want to leave. I don’t think she’d hold us against our will. She’s got a very strong sense of right and wrong and doesn’t like hurting people’s feelings. But if we don’t check it out, then we might be missing an opportunity.”

Her companions didn’t seem so sure, but they followed her when she started to move. She took another deep breath. “God I hate my job sometimes,” she muttered before stepping up. The murmuring of the crowd grew an octave when they saw her, a rather normal looking teenager, walk up to the front door, grab the carved obsidian handle, and yank it open.

Lisa stepped in.

The inside was every interior decorator’s fantasy. There was a small waiting area by the entrance, then a wide seating space with square tables made of shaped granite with chairs that looked to be made of ice placed around them. At the far end of the room was a long countertop that cut off the rest of the restaurant from the kitchens. And behind the counter was Behemoth, probably on a lower floor as only the top half of his body was visible.

The Endbringer was wearing a floppy chef’s hat and an apron with the words ‘Get Helped’ written on it in comic-sans.

Lisa closed her eyes and worked very hard to suppress her powers. If she let them loose now she was going to faint. Brian paused right behind her and even though she couldn’t see him, she could feel the discomfort rolling off his body.

There was a muffled thump off to the side and both of them turned to see a man in a black suit with a ball gag and blindfold on, tied to a chair off in the corner. He was wiggling and straining against the cords tied around his torso. They both decided not to comment.

“Hi!” said Queen Administrator’s voice off to one side. “And welcome to Behemoth’s Meat Palace where you can get cooked or eat cooked.”

There was a long, long beat of silence, spoiled only by the creak of Brian’s leather jacket as he shifted behind her.

“Goddamnit, Queenie,” someone said from near the counters. “What did we say about leaving the naming and advertising to us?”

A girl stepped out, a bit taller than Lisa and with long blonde hair. Next to her was another familiar blonde. Glory Girl, or perhaps just Victoria as she was out of costume, waved at Lisa and Brian, then elbowed her sister to do the same.

Panacea took in Lisa, then Brian, then shot her sister an inquisitive glance. Before Lisa could really read into it, she looked around to see if there was anyone else in the room. At the back, near the counter, was a ten foot tall mechanical dragon, apparently deeply engrossed in conversation with the Simurgh who was just on the other side of the counter and wearing a waitress outfit while waving a notepad around.

There was a third blonde girl sitting a little closer to Behemoth.

“Uh,” Lisa said smartly. “Hi?”

“I think there are too many of us doing the greeting thing,” Queen Administrator said. “We’ll scare away the clients!”

The blonde that had first spoken shook her head. “Right, us talking too much will scare them. Not the Endbringer in the chef’s hat. Whatever. I said I’d wait here until people started showing up. These two count, so I’ll be off. See you at home later, right?”

“Yeah, sure! See ya Cass. Oh, and if you see dad could you, uh, explain?”

The blonde, Cass, quirked an eyebrow at that. “I’ll certainly try. Hey, G-G, wanna give me a ride?””

Glory Girl shrugged, gave her sister a look that Lisa didn’t bother translating, then nodded. “Yeah, sure. Amy, I’ll pick you up once I get back? Mom will probably get whiny if we don’t make it back home before sunset.”

Queen Administrator might have noticed that Lisa and Brian were out of their depth, or maybe she just knew that neither of them had any reason to care about her friend’s goings-on. Either way, the cape stepped up to the two of them with a huge grin plastered across her face. “Well, enough of that, are you guys here for the sun tanning or for food?”

“Uh,” said Brian.

“What he's trying to say is that he doesn’t exactly need a tan,” Lisa said, prompting a giggle out of Queen Administrator. She didn’t fail to notice the way she was eyeing Brian up. She filed that as potential blackmail material. “How about you, um, show us the menus?”

“Right this way then!” Queen Administrator lead them towards a table off to one side and both of them took seats across from each other, but angled in such a way that they could both keep an eye on the Endbringers in the room.

The others, Panacea, the strange blonde girl and Dragon’s mech suit, all congregated off to one side. Are following along with Queen Administrator. Playing along with the shop. Lisa squinted a little and tried to see what was going on underneath the obvious. “This is... strange.”

“That defines Queen Administrator pretty well,” Brian said. He too, was eyeing the rest of the room. Knowing him as she did, she just assumed that he was trying to see what there was to gain from all of this. Or maybe he was wary of the two Endbringers they could see and the one they couldn’t.

“No. I mean, yes, she is strange, but opening a shop like this doesn’t fit her MO. I mean, it does, but it doesn’t.”

He just gave her a flat look.

“Okay, let me explain,” Lisa said. “Queen Admin builds a castle, which, admittedly, fits her way of doing things. It’s big, it’s flashy, it’s kind of scary but mostly harmless. She gets to show off her strength without having to hurt anyone and it’s a giant, visible reminder not to fuck with her. But this place doesn’t fit that. She’s not gaining anything from this. She doesn’t need the money, the recognition, the location, or the prestige.”

“Maybe she just wants to own a restaurant. And you’re not going to comment on Behemoth being here?” The last came out as a hiss while he glanced at the Endbringer in question, who seemed to be trying to cook something on a flat piece of granite. Lisa could smell the charcoaled meat from her place.

She shrugged. “There was an explosion downtown this morning. That was probably him coming around. Honestly it was just a matter of time before she completed the set.”

“Here you go!” Queen Administrator said from just over Lisa’s shoulder. It had her heart skipping a beat before she noticed the menu the cape had slid in front of her. Lisa sighed and nodded to her in thanks before staring at the menu again. It was just one page, like something you’d see in some of the fancier restaurants. It was also, she noted, printed on a piece of steel. Reinforced, Tinkertech alloy. Meant for armour. Dragon made it. Dragon has an armour-printing machine. Dragon used her armour-printing machine to make menus. Menus are nearly indestructible.

Lisa looked at the selection and was glad that she wasn’t a vegetarian because every meal was some sort of meat. She pretended not to see the ‘Rare is not an option’ sign at the very bottom. She was still trying to pick something out when she noticed Queen Administrator pulling up a chair, then Amy Dallon doing the same next to her, followed by the blonde girl who had been talking to Dragon a while ago.

“I’m really glad you’re here, Lisa,” Queen Administrator said. “Though I’m kind of disappointed that you’re blonde.

Lisa, who was, at least in her own not-so-humble opinion, pretty good at the whole talking thing, was thrown for a loop at that. “What’s wrong with being blonde?” she asked.

The other blonde at the table was holding onto her hair and looking at it as if to see if it was dirty or wrong somehow.

“Oh, there’s nothing wrong about being blonde, it’s just that there are so many of you who are my friends. Mars, Cass, Vicky, you…. That was most of the girls in the room except for Amy and I.” Queen Administrator’s face scrunched up and Lisa didn’t want to use her power to find out if she was thinking or just had to fart. “Dragon, are you a blonde?”

“I’m not a blonde,” the Tinker replied. She seemed to be deep in a conversation with the Simurgh who was smiling right back.

The Simurgh perked up, then made a ‘one moment’ gesture to Dragon before reaching down and grabbing... something.

The Endbringer floated over the counter and over to the table, fully revealing the pink dress and half-apron she was wearing, like a waitress’s outfit from the mid-fifties.

She dangled the... her hands next to the table and over an empty seat between Brian and Lisa. Then Aisha appeared, her face an unhealthy, pale shade as she hung firmly in the Simurgh’s grasp. “I don’t want to pee myself!” she whined.

There was a long beat of silence at the table until Queen Administrator perked up. “Another client!”

The Simurgh nodded and placed Aisha down in the seat next to her brother. Then, the Endbringer carefully patted Aisha’s head. Brian eyed them both, one with a look that promised a long discussion later and the other with something that Lisa imagined was restrained fear.

“And you’re also not blonde!” Queen Administrator added. “Amy, the brunettes now outnumber the blondes. It’s time to plot our hair colour revolution!”

Amy placed a hand on Queen Administrator’s head and pushed her back down into her seat. “Calm down. Also, shouldn’t you be taking your client’s orders?”

Queen Administrator blinked, then gave them all a sheepish smile before pulling a notepad and pen out from her costume. “Right, sorry. We’re going to hire, uh, actual staff at some point. Probably. But in the meantime... yeah, what’ll you be taking?”

“Uh,” Brian began eloquently. “I’ll have the T-bone, medium rare,” he finally said. Picked the first thing he saw. Expects me to pay.

“I’ll have the filet mignon, well cooked,” Lisa said. With Behemoth as chef she honestly expected well-cooked to mean cancerous, but certain sacrifices had to be made and she could probably bug Queen Administrator enough to get Panacea to heal her if things went horribly wrong.

All the attention at the table suddenly turned to Aisha who was perhaps not very good at being the centre of attention despite trying so very hard to be there. “I’ll just have water,” she squeaked.

Queen Administrator grabbed Brian’s menu, flipped it around, then displayed it towards Aisha. “What kind?”

They had a water menu, Lisa realised. They had a water menu that was longer than their non-water menu.

“Uh.”

“I suggest the Leviathan special,” the insane cape said.

“Sure?” Aisha agreed. Then her brain kicked back into gear and made her pause. “Wait, what’s the Leviathan special?”

“It’s water,” Queen Administrator said. “Uh, I don’t know what makes it special.” Lisa paid a lot more attention when she noticed the girl’s eyes almost glazing over. Is listening to Leviathan. “I mean, he’s explained it, but it’s mostly just really pure water with a very specific mixture of minerals and atoms and... stuff.”

“It’s not, unhealthy, right?”

Queen Administrator gave Aisha a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry, I’m sure Amy wouldn’t mind putting you back together if it all goes horribly wrong.” With that said, she snatched the menu away from Lisa’s end of the table and flounced off towards the counters.

“Speaking of Panacea,” Mars said, her first words since sitting down at their table. “Um, could you use your powers to change people’s hair colour?”

The Dallon girl looked off somewhere past Lisa’s shoulder, then shrugged. “Yeah, I guess.” Could change a person’s hair. Could change a person’s biology. Is thinking of changing her sister’s biology. Wants to turn her sister into a dog-girl hybrid. Wants to smear peanut butter all over her--

Everyone turned towards Lisa when she started coughing violently and she felt a hand tapping her gently on the back to clear her airway. “Ch-choked on my spit,” she said with the first breath of air she took.

“You want me to look at that?” Panacea asked.

Lisa waved her off with a hurried gesture. “I’m good,” she said before turning to thank whomever was thumping her back.

The Simurgh smiled down at her, one hand resting on Lisa’s shoulder. Is smug. Knows what I’m thinking. Is growing more smug with that knowledge. Is thinking of building a Tinkertech device. Is thinking of building a device that can turn people into foxes. Is thinking of turning me into a fox. Is thinking of smearing peanut butter all over her--

Lisa fainted.

***

Yes, I know, a sudden ending. Boo.

Next time, on How to Train Your Endbringer! 

Harry wins the Quidditch cup single handedly against Sauron and his dark council of Sailor Senshis. Darth Sidious the Wise discovers the power of using honey as a sugar substitute while taking his weekly long-distance cooking lessons with Twilight Sparkle and the author is kicked out of rehab for flirting with the aged receptionist while drunk. Oh, and someone visits Brockton Bay next chapter.

Mucho Credits to Vhalidictes and eschwartz and js_za and ChaoticSky!


	33. Chapter 33

Director Piggot leaned her elbows on the table, fingers intertwined in a crossing arch over her mouth as she stared from one person to the next.

Gathered across from her were two capes, two of her most trusted agents, and two members from the bureaucratic side of the PRT. A small laptop was sitting on the table, screen open to display a grid with the faces of six of the other Directors.

“We are here to talk about one of the most dangerous interactions the Protectorate and Parahuman Response Team will have to face. If things do not end well we could be facing an Extinction Level threat within the next forty-two hours.” She shifted her gaze back across the room, wishing that she had cool glasses that could glint ominously in the light. “I’m talking, of course, about Queen Administrator’s tea party.”

It should have sounded silly. So many adults and influential capes gathered to talk about a teenager’s tea party, but they all knew what could be lost if things didn’t go right. Director Armstrong shifted on-screen. “I have a team ready to escort the pastries over.”

Director Costa-Brown nodded. “We’ll have Cook-Off in Boston before the night’s out. He’ll be bringing some of his own equipment and ingredients.”

“What about the tea itself?” Legend, one of the two capes present, asked. “Just store-bought black tea?”

A few of the Directors who thought themselves more refined and special because they drank tea gave him odd, almost disgusted, looks. Piggor never had understood the snobbery of tea-drinkers. “No,” Hearthrow said. “We imported teas from India and the United Kingdom, courtesy of the Thanda and the King’s Men. The tea set is a lease from the King’s Men too. It’s Victorian.”

“An old tea set?” Legend asked. “Does that really matter so much?”

“No. I meant Victorian literally. As in, it belonged to Queen Victoria.”

There were nods all around. To most of them that kind of detail wouldn’t matter one whit, but it sounded like the sort of thing Queen Administrator would appreciate. “I’ve yet to read the last script,” Tagg admitted. “What kind of questions are we going to ask?”

“It’s not a script,” Costa-Brown said. “Scripts require the ability to predict what the other party will say or do.”

She didn’t need to explain why that was futile.

“Are we sure she’ll even show up?” Armsmaster asked. He shifted in his seat next to Legend.

Across from him, one of her teammates, Thomas Calvert, nodded. “Armsmaster’s right. She just opened a... restaurant and tanning salon near the Boardwalk. That might keep her occupied for a bit.”

Piggot leaned back into her chair, then pointed with one hand at a binder that had been left on the corner of the table. Her chair creaked and for a moment that, and the sound of the taxed air conditioning, were the only noises in the room. “She posted ads looking for employees on the Parahumans Online threads.”

Legend tilted his head to one side. “Not exactly the usual place to look for employees.”

She shrugged. “I suspect that posting on a normal job site looking for normal employees would be something of an exercise in futility. If she’s looking for bizarre people willing to work alongside an Endbringer, of all things, then she could do worse than to search on... that site.”

Costa-Brown put an end to that tangent with a wave of her hand, as though dismissing the entire thing. “I saw your recommendations, Director Piggot, for the presences at the party. Are you certain that having so few people on our side is a good idea?”

“We don’t need to present a united front or try to appear strong.” She had their attention, Legend and Armsmaster were looking her way and Calvert glanced away from his notepad. “The fewer people there, the smaller the likelihood that someone will say something that we’ll all regret. I think Legend and maybe one representative of the PRT would be more than enough.”

“I’m inclined to agree,” Costa-Brown weighed in. “Fewer losses if those attending are compromised. No offense, Legend.”

“None taken.”

“It will also,” the chief director continued, “allow those in attendance to pay more attention to Queen Administrator and perhaps distract any guests she brings.”

“The question is,” Calvert asked while tapping a pen to the middle of his notepad, “who will represent the PRT for us? We have little time to train someone new for the task. I doubt it would be wise to allow the Director herself to attend.”

The door clicked as it opened and a young man walked in, his eyes downcast and focusing on a clipboard. “Director Piggot, Ma’am--” The man stopped and stared at all the rather important people who were staring right back. “Uh.”

Piggot’s face twisted into a wry grin. “Hello, Timothy.”

“Uh, hi ma’am, Legend, Armsmaster, um, Directors.” Timothy swallowed visibly but rallied faster than she might have in his situation. “I was told to bring you this,” he said, lifting up a small black box.

“And what’s in there?” she asked.

Timothy blinked, then turned the box around to face himself. With a flick of his thumb he opened it, revealing a mouse trap. “Uh.”

There was a flash and half the people around the table leapt to their feet.

“Hello, everyone! It is I, the protector of rodents, defeater of cats, the pussy slayer herself, Mouse Protector!”


	34. Chapter 34

In Which Lisa Gets Ready

I have written a lot of stories in my time around here. This is the first one with so many damned tea parties.

Have more Lisa POV because she’s actually pretty fun to write.

***

Lisa came awake with a yawning stretch that sent pops rolling up her spine and spreading out to her other joints as she writhed her arms and legs just so to get those satisfying cracks before recoiling in totally relaxed limpness. Her yawn petered out seemingly on the verge of dislocating her jaw, but the chill air that flowed into her when she inhaled stirred her mind enough to stop her from simply curling up and going back to sleep.

Blinking past eye-crud, Lisa stared around the room she was in. Her bed, in the loft, was a rather lumpy single with a mattress that had seen better days. She had been meaning to replace it for some time but kept putting it off because most mattress stores didn’t do so well post-Leviathan.

She looked around, trying to find her nightstand where she stashed her laptop, or the dresser where she left her piles of dirty clothes.

Her mind clicked into gear with the efficiency and suddenness of a mid-eighties muscle car that had been filled with diesel instead of gas.

Her room in the loft wasn’t the size of a basketball court, she recalled. It also didn’t have icy pillars vaguely shaped like winged women climbing up to a ceiling decorated in subtle fractals that reflected a soft white glow throughout her room. Her bed was not a four-poster with a canopy either, nor did her room lack any furniture whatsoever other than a bed that was frankly absurdly large.

She stared down at the bed she was on, then tried to bounce on the spot only for her weight to sink into the mattress a little. It felt like it was made of feathers.

She poked it. Is made of down feathers. Entire mattress is one big pillow.

Lisa nodded. That made sense and explained why it was so soft and fluffy.

Now, she just had to figure out where the hell she was and why she was there and everything would be nice.

Lisa Wilburn did not hyperventilate. She was a big girl. Big girls who worked as part-time supervillains did not freak out when they woke up in strange rooms that looked like they were designed by overeager Disney employees.

No, instead Lisa started taking notes. Notes were good, even mental ones. They kept her sane, gave her a list of things to work with. In fact, that’s where she decided to start, with a list of everything she had available to her.

She patted the soft mattress again. Is not meant to be used as a weapon, her power reminded her. Still, she was creative, and maybe she could use it to smother someone.

She looked at her clothes. They were not her clothes. She had never purchased white and grey flannel pyjama pants before and she had no clue who the Pumpkin Pete on her T-shirt was. Was undressed. Not wearing the same underclothes. She tried very hard not to think on that too much.

Lisa decided that making a list was probably not so helpful after all and that maybe hyperventilating was the way to go. All the popular kids were doing it. She knew it was a favourite pastime of the PRT ever since Queen Administrator showed up.

Like puzzle pieces being jammed together by monkeys, two things finally clicked and two plus two came up six.

This was all Queen Administrator’s fault.

Feeling much better now that she had someone to blame for all the problems in her life, Lisa began to calm down and tried to wade out of the fluffy bed.

Then the double doors at the far end of the room slammed open with a sound like a steel drum hitting concrete after being dropped from orbit.

Lisa screamed.

Queen Administrator screamed.

The Simurgh made a noise that might have been a laugh from somewhere behind Queen Administrator.

After the echoing noise of the door faded and Lisa ran out of breath until her scream petered out, Queen Administrator blinked and looked around. “Uh. Good morning?”

Lisa closed her eyes because she was very done with that morning. She was super done with it. “Hi,” she said.

Taking that as an invitation, Queen Administrator flounced into the room, gaining a little speed until she catapulted herself into the air and crashed onto the bed with a satisfied ‘oomph.’

Lisa watched the girl squirm on the admittedly soft surface for a bit until she managed to turn herself around. “Did you sleep well?”

“Yes.” Lisa said. She decided then and there that she was going to answer everything with monosyllables until the world started making sense again.

“Cool! We were a little worried when you fainted. Amy said you were alright. Well, mostly alright. Your magic super-power brain tumour was acting up something fierce she said, but she can’t really do brains and everyone told me that asking Leviathan to help was probably a bad idea and that you just needed a nap. So we brought you in here to sleep for a bit. And I hope you don’t mind, but you can’t sleep in your normal clothes because then you’d get the bed all dirty and it can't be comfy to sleep in jeans so Simmy changed you last night and you’ve been asleep ever since.”

“Okay,” Lisa said.

“Awesome! Anywho, I have a tea party later with Legend and some of his PRT buddies, but that’s not for a while. So I figured I’d come in here and see if you were alright and if you slept well.” She shifted on the bed again. “Gosh, this bed is the best. I should ask Simmy to make one for at home too.”

Lisa nodded slowly and pretended not to notice the way the Simurgh’s smile grew wider at the last comment. Bed is made of the Simurgh’s own feathers. Lisa took a deep breath to process that. So are the underwear. “Okay,” she said again, and if it came out a little squeaky, no one commented.

“Anywho! Your clothes are all folded up in the bathroom down the hall and that Brian boy that you were with said he’d stop by to pick you up.” A frown crossed Queen Administrator’s face. “Is he your boyfriend?”

“No.” She thinks he’s cute.

“Okay. Anyway. The gate’s open and you pretty much just need to keep heading downwards to find the exit. We’re in the, uh, right-hand-side tower of the Grand Administratorius. If you reach the dungeon you’ve gone too far. If you find Simmy’s shipping room... then I’m really sorry.”

The Simurgh likes romance. The Simurgh tracks possible romantic relationships. The Simurgh tracks all possible relationships. 

“T-thanks,” Lisa said.

That perked the girl up, and with some effort she sat up on the side of the bed. “No problem! That’s what friends are for!”

Genuinely thinks of you as a friend. Wants to get to know you more. Wants you to want to hang out.

Lisa pushed her way off the bed and instantly regretted it when she was standing up. The bed called to her. It wanted her back. She wanted to go back and sink into its warm, loving embrace. She shook her head and willed the thoughts away. “I...” she began before remembering her attempt to keep things sane.

As far as she knew, the faster she got away from Queen Administrator, the faster things would go back to making sense. Except, things in the sane world of Brockton Bay weren’t all that great. “You said something about a Tea-Party?”

Queen Administrator’s eyes shone with an inner light that sent a shiver down Lisa’s spine. “Yes! Yes, we’re going to a tea party later. Legend will be there! And, well, me. The Dallon sisters said that they couldn’t come and Cass doesn’t like tea. So it’ll just be me and Levi but not Behemoth since he has work today.”

Lisa raised a hand in a ‘wait a moment’ gesture and the girl’s rambling speech came to a stop. She had to think, she had to really consider what she’d just been told. It was fairly obvious that Queen Administrator was a little lonely and afraid, or worried, about going to that so-called tea party on her own. Also, Behemoth had a job. Gets paid an hourly wage. Has weekends off. Has paid medical, dental... Lisa pressed a hand to the side of her head.

She couldn’t afford a headache right then and, while she still felt fresh and awake and fine, she didn’t want to start pushing her power so early in the morning. “You’re trying to convince me to go with you, aren’t you?”

Queen Administrator had the good graces to blush at least. “Pretty much, yeah. It’ll be fun?”

“I don’t even have a costume,” Lisa pointed out.

The girl snorted as she swam off the bed and landed on the balls of her feet. Before Lisa could start to protest, Queen Administrator grabbed her hand and pulled her out of the room. Lisa stumbled after her and into a long corridor that curved off to one side, the exterior wall dotted with slitted windows that hinted at a really great view of Brockton Bay as they sped past.

“Eeny, meenie, minie, moe,” Queen Administrator sang as they passed doors to their left.

“What are you--” Lisa started to ask. Is picking a door at random.

“This one!” she said as she pulled Lisa to a stop in front of a door that was identical to the last ten they’d passed. Letting go of Lisa’s hand, she tore it open then stepped in.

Lisa followed after, eyes darting around to take in what looked to be a walk-in closet of sorts, only it was completely devoid of any clothes. Or almost.

Sitting on a rack in the middle of the room, surrounded on three sides by angled mirrors, was a white bodysuit, a nearly familiar bodysuit.

“What?” Lisa asked. “But you just picked a random room,” she complained, her mind jumping to the first thing of many that didn’t make sense.

Queen Administrator shrugged. “Precog,” she said.

Lisa closed her eyes, hoping against all hope, that when she opened them the world would make sense. She sighed when she opened her eyes to find that insanity was still the order of the day. “Okay,” she said.

“So, what do you think?” Queen Administrator said. She was admiring the suit, one finger poking at the cuffs around the wrists where the suit was lined with fluffy feathers.

Lisa didn’t know what to think. It was an exact copy of her costume. Only it was white and grey instead of black and purple and the edges were trimmed with hundreds of white feathers. The Domino mask was twisted on the edges to look like a pair of tiny wings were sprouting from them and, when she looked down, she noticed that the comfortable boots she usually wore were replaced by a pair of rather daring high heels.

“It’s... nice?”

“Isn’t it?” Queen Administrator asked. “I’ll be outside. Just knock when you’re done changing!”

Lisa heard the door click shut behind her. She moved off to one side, then leaned forwards until her forehead was pressed against a wall.

After a bit of therapeutic denial where she crossed all seven stages and only had to wipe her eyes a little, Lisa pushed off the wall and spun towards the costume. “At least it’s in my size,” she muttered.

After making sure that no one was peeking, Lisa slid out of the stupidly comfortable pyjamas she was in, and into the costume. She had one bare leg inside when she realized that the inner lining was some sort of smooth fur. She pushed her leg in, then out, then in again. “Oh,” she said.

“Is everything alright?” came Queen Administrator’s voice from just outside.

Lisa jumped. “Y-yeah.”

“Is it too tight? Because I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t fit in that costume and I’ve got literally no curves.”

Lisa zipped up the front of the costume, slid on the high-heeled boots and fixed the matching domino mask on. When she turned, she saw her reflection in the mirror and had to twist left and right a little to admire the outfit. It did look a little like her Tattletale costume, but the Simurgh-esque inspiration was clear as day. The mask hid a bit more of her face and drew the attention away while the boots gave her an extra inch two inches of height.

She tried walking around a little and found it surprisingly easy to keep her balance. Tinkertech boots. Then she remembered that the Simurgh was bullshit and that was kind of expected.

“You can come in,” she called.

Queen Administrator stepped into the room while slipping a phone into a pocket hidden in the folds of her costume robes. “Oh, that looks really cool!” She jumped forwards, arms stretched out to hug Lisa, only to pause mid-step and swing her arms around to prevent a fall onto her face. “O-oh, um... can I hug you?”

Lisa had never been the most touchy-feely person, but she wasn’t averse to hugging. She shrugged. “Sure.”

“And if I do hug you, you won’t become pregnant with evil genocidal clone babies?”

“... What?” Lisa asked. Has happened to Queen Administrator before. “What?!”

“I’ll take that as a yes!” Queen Administrator finished her aborted jump and squeezed Lisa in a pair of surprisingly strong arms. “Oh, this is going to be so much fun!” she said as she pulled back, grabbed Lisa’s hands and dragged her towards the door.

Lisa stumbled after her, still trying to catch up on the whole genocidal clone babies thing. She was so lost in thought that she almost missed it when Queen Administrator pulled her into another room.

“Hello, everyone!” the insane cape who might have been a surrogate mother said.

Lisa blinked and pulled her hands free of Queen Administrator’s grasp to allow her to look around. They were in a sort of living space. A big TV sat off to one side, facing a pair of comfortable couches laid atop a rug. Chairs and a table were tucked away in the far corner of the room where a half-wall separated them from what looked like a kitchen.

There were six teenagers in the room. No, not teenagers, she realized. Some of them might have been eighteen or nineteen, but the rest looked a bit older, maybe in their early twenties. Lisa’s attention skipped from one to the other.

Two of them were in wheelchairs, one a pretty red-headed young woman who waved shyly, the other the same man that had been tied up at Behemoth’s restaurant. He was wearing a gag and a thick pair of sunglasses. Being restrained. Punishment.

Lisa decided to ignore that. Their kinks weren’t any of her business. One of the other girls was familiar, the blonde that had been sitting with them yesterday. Mars, she thought her name might be. And next to Mars was a broad-shouldered young man who eyed her up and down once before returning his attention to the TV. On the opposite couch was a thin young man who gave her a smile that even she had to admit was handsome.

She then turned her attention to the biggest and most interesting person, a twelve foot tall monster with a girl’s torso sticking out of the top. The girl looked nervous, her hands were twinned together over her chest and her tentacles were wrapping around each other. 

“Oh, right. Everyone, this is Lisa, Lisa, that’s Trickster.” Queen Administrator pointed to the guy tied to the wheelchair. “He tried to kidnap me so he’s in time-out.”

“Okay,” Lisa said.

“That’s Jess, she’s nice. That’s Mars, but you already met. The boys are Ballistic and Oliver. And the pretty one in the back is Noelle.” There was a bit of a flush to Queen Administrator’s cheeks and Lisa couldn’t resist the urge to let her power slip, even if just a little. Is attracted to Noelle. Isn’t a lesbian. Isn’t straight. Is attracted to non-human aspects of Noelle. “Anyway,” Queen Administrator continued, cutting off Lisa’s power before she could really dig into that mess, “they’re staying here because Behemoth accidentally blew up their house.”

“That’s... nice of you,” Lisa said. She took in the group and the bit of tension set in their postures. They didn’t look like they were all pleased about being in Queen Administrator's castle. On the other hand, none of them looked like they’d been mistreated and this was probably one of the safer places... anywhere.

“Thanks! We’ll help them get on their feet in no time. I’d help today, but we have that tea party to attend in a few minutes.”

“Ah, right. It was nice meeting you all?” Lisa said before waving at the group. A few of them waved back and Trickster mumbled something while fighting against his bonds.

Queen Administrator smiled at them all and led Lisa through the room and out of another doorway. They found themselves in a huge hall, one side dominated by a throne and the other by a massive pair of doors held ajar by a resting Leviathan.

The Endbringer’s head rose up as they neared him and his four eyes shifted from Queen Administrator to Lisa and back. “Hey Levi!” Queen Administrator said before hugging the Endbringer’s shoulder. “Are you ready to go?”

They were having a conversation, Lisa could tell, but she couldn’t read the Endbringer’s body language well enough to fill in the half of it she was missing, even with the help of her power. “Are we going to go with him?” Lisa finally asked.

“Yup. Just the three of us. Simmy has a project she wanted to work on, she wants it to be a surprise, and Behemoth’s working at his restaurant with Dragon. She’s teaching him the ropes. Levi’s not really doing much besides making sure the weather is nice.”

Leviathan spun around until he was on all fours, the motion so fast that Lisa had a hard time following it before his open hands slammed into the ground and kept him poised to strike. She took a step back. It was so easy to forget that the creature before her was one of the most feared beings on Earth Bet, that it had sunk islands and ruined cities and killed millions. With Queen Administrator next to it, acting all goofy and silly it was hard to keep the threat real.

Queen Administrator didn’t even flinch at the sudden motion. She just stepped up to Leviathan and scrambled onto his now-lowered shoulder. “You can sit on the other side, if you want!”

Lisa stared up at the monster, then almost stepped back when it shifted to present its other shoulder to her. Gingerly, she grabbed onto the Endbringer’s smooth but still wet skin and pulled herself up and onto his shoulder. She squeaked when he suddenly stood up.

Queen Administrator giggled as she shifted precariously on Leviathan’s shoulder. “Onwards!” she shouted while pointing out and above.

***

Next time, on How To Train Your Endbringer!

The fabled Tea-Party of Doom! Or maybe not doom, but more like... awkward conversations.

Mucho thanks to eschwartz and ChaoticSky, for making the story easier on the eyes.

Oh, and I want to remind you all that I have a new story! Grim Noir, whose second chapter has just gone up today. If you want more sexy Lisa on Taylor action then pop on over for a quick read!


	35. Chapter 35

Half-Time

Keeping in theme with breaking the rules of writing, I’mma spit in the face of Word Entropy now.

See if you can Spot the Salacious Surprise

***

She should have felt guilty. Knocking Chevalier, one of the Protectorate’s greatest heroes, out was a bit rude. But they had sent her here as little more than a glorified sidekick. A show of how cool the Protectorate still was. Lily knew that she was marketable (the damned PR department counted that as a bigger victory than her actual achievements), so of course she was picked.

She figured she had a day, two at most, before she would be brought in for questioning about her very public betrayal of a world-renowned hero.

Sucked for them. Flechette’s days as a glorified sidekick were over, and if the PR department wanted to make a fuss about it, they could always label her as some sort of anti-hero. Those were always cooler anyway.

She ducked down under a cement overhang, making sure not to knock her head as she walked towards the waiting room set out for the champions of the first round. The indistinct roar of the crowd faded behind her as she walked down a fluorescent-lit corridor, only really noticing that she wasn’t alone when she was nearly at the end.

Some of the people around her were easy enough to recognize. Jack Slash could call himself whatever he damned well pleased but it wouldn’t stop her from knowing just who he was. The same applied to Bonesaw.

She wasn’t the only one. The two villains were being separated from the rest of the group. Even Valefor and Citrine and Othello were leaving them plenty of space.

Sticking with the other heroes was probably for the best, she decided.

Siddling over to her left, she found herself next to a floating Glory Girl and a rather grim-faced Vista.

“Someone pissed in your cornflakes?” she asked the shorter girl.

She got a flat look her for troubles. Vista looked ready to tear into her, but a phone started ringing, the sound echoing down the corridor and interrupting whatever she was going to say.

Sticking her neck where it wasn’t wanted was, fortunately, one of Glory Girl’s many hobbies. “I figure that she’s actually a little miffed that she won.”

“She wanted to lose?” Lily asked over Vista’s head.

“She,” Vista said. “Is right here. And I’m not sad that I won. I’m happy that I won. Winning is good. I’m pissed that I had to be all sneaky just to participate.”

“Some would say that you’re a bit young,” Lily said.

“Some didn’t say that about you,” Vista shot back.

Shorty: one, Lily: nil, she thought. “Okay, that’s fair, I guess. But you made it through the first round. Didn’t murder anyone that I saw. You’ll probably get a hell of a tongue lashing but you’ll be fine.” She went to pat the girl on the head, but decided against it and gave her shoulder a pat instead.

Squeezing a little closer, Lily and the others moved through a set of wide-open double doors and into a large lounging room. Chairs and long sofas lined the far wall, there was a small bar and even what looked like a workshop, ostensibly for the Tinkers to Tinker at.

She wasn’t surprised when ‘Wyvern’ dragged ‘Defiant’ over to the corner and gently placed him on a stool. Or as gently as a two meter tall walking techno-dragon could be. The man looked a little rumpled.

Still, they were minding their own business, so Lily wasn’t about to start anything. Instead she picked out a nice sofa and walked over to it to flop down and sink into its plush cushions.

Sitting down next to her was Glory Girl, then Vista uncrossed her arms and sat on Lily’s other side. “How long do you think we’re going to have to wait?” she asked.

Shrugging, Lily replied, “I don’t know. I can’t imagine Queen Administrator stretching it on for too long. People like their bloodsport too much.”

“Sport?” Glory Girl asked. “That was more like an exhibition match of how scary parahumans can be. Frankly, I wouldn’t be surprised if Queen Administrator just did it to distract people from how much scarier she is. She’s tricky that way.”

“She really is,” Vista agreed. With a gesture at the fridge all the way across the room, the floor shifted so that it was right next to her, the rest of the area looking like a M.C.Escher painting that had gone a little runny. “Want anything?” she asked as she opened the fridge. “Nevermind.”

Soda bottles came out. Three of them. Each with an anime-style caricature of Lily, Vista and Glory Girl on them. Vista stared at her image on the can for a while, taking in the fierce glare and the admittedly badass high kick pose her tiny image was in for a few long seconds before nodding in approval.

“Sister... Saviour Flavour,” Glory Girl read aloud. “What the heck?” Her can had an anime Glory Girl with 90s anime eyes holding onto a black suit wearing Panacea’s hands in both of hers. She was also wearing the skimpiest wedding dress Lily had ever seen.

“So that whole thing about you and your sister,” Lily asked.

“S-shut up, none of that’s true,” Glory Girl said. Her blush spoke to the opposite though, if Lily had to guess.

“She’s adopted, no?” Vista added.

“So what?”

“So nothing,” Vista said, both hands coming up in a defensive stance. “Just... pointing it out.” She smiled and popped the tab on her Vista Berry Her Foot In Your Face flavoured can and took a sip. “Oh, it’s strawberry,” she said.

She spun her can around and took in the image of, well, herself. The armour was all correct, so were all the costume bits. Though she didn’t usually get so bloody in a fight, or so sweaty. And her armour didn’t fit quite that... well. Her character was standing with legs apart and arbalest resting on the ground, bent forwards a little as if she was tired, but satisfied. Above and behind her was the Kanji for her namesake, but instead of being written how Lilly's mother taught her, it used the kanji for the actual flower. Which seemed like an odd mistake to make.

She then read the name on the can. Scissor Sauce. And under it, a subtitle: Slices Through Your Thirst.

“So, who am I going to have to kill?” she asked with the sweetest smile she could manage.

 

“Simurgh, probably,” Vista said. She tried to hide her grin by taking another sip of her drink, but Lilly could see right past that. The girl’s eyes were practically dancing with mirth. Then she started ringing again.

Sighing, Vista pulled out a phone and slid the end call button across the screen before slipping it back into a pocket.

“Shit, you really think the Simurgh did this?” Lilly asked, still eyeing the can.

“She totally would,” Glory Girl said. “She likes anime and cosplay and all that stuff.”

“Spend lots of time with the local Endbringer?” Lilly asked. “Or were you just there to keep your sister safe?”

“Shut up,” Glory Girl bit back. “It’s not like that.”

“‘S okay,” Vista said before swallowing. “If anime has taught me anything it’s that sister love is the sweetest love. Personally I think it’s real romantic.”

She had to hide a smile behind the act of popping open her own can of soda and pressing it against her lips as Glory Girl went so red it looked as if she might pop a blood vessel. “The Simurgh, Queen Administrator, Brockton Bay. What can you girls tell me? I was thinking of maybe transferring over a while ago. It’s not too far from home and Brockton Bay gets more action than New York, at least for Wards. But now the whole place is kind of an information black hole. No idea what’s going on.”

“Seems weird that we wouldn’t hear about that,” Glory Girl said. She was giving Lilly a dubious look. “Who’s stopping information about the Bay from getting out?”

“Senate tried to sneak this bill about information quarantine about Brockton Bay. It flopped, but they managed to keep it out of the news,” Lilly said. She was enjoying being the one with all the cards here, it was refreshing. “PRT tried something similar the second the Simurgh landed, but that failed too. Like, it failed via a bunch of totally random coincidences. Three directors had anvils accidentally crash onto their cars on the same day kind of thing. The higher-ups aren’t saying it, but it’s totally a Simurgh plot.”

“She would use anvils,” Vista said. “Or pianos. She probably did it just for the mem--” Vista was interrupted by another ring from her pocket. She sighed and pulled out her phone, the same Wards issue smartphone that Lilly had, and glared at the screen.

“Someone important?” Glory Girl asked.

“Someone annoying,” Vista said. “It’s Director Piggot.”

“Shit,” Lilly said. “You’re in so much trouble.”

Shoving the phone back, Vista put it on the table before her and crossed her arms. “Well I’m not answering her.”

Silence reigned for a bit. Lilly met Glory Girl’s eyes and they silently agreed not to touch Vista’s issues just yet. It was probably not very nice of them to let the girl stew in her problems, but they didn’t have the time to figure out all the ways the smaller girl was messed up.

Showing up incognito in what was essentially a deathmatch (even if Lily silently suspected that no one had actually died) was not a sign of strong mental health.

“Sorry, could I get to the fridge please?” a soft, young voice asked from over the top of the couch. “Uncle Jash is really thirsty.”

Sliding to the side, Lilly watched in mounting horror as Bonesaw, the Bonesaw, hopped up to the top of the couch, limbs spinning as she tried to climb up. She failed, eyes going wide for a moment before her entire body pitched forwards and she flopped onto the couch with an oomph. “Well, that worked.”

Sitting straighter, the girl shook her head, adjusted her head full of black ringlets and then opened the fridge door. “Ohh, they have sodas just for us! I’m not allowed to drink soda usually. It’s too sweet.” She shut the door, three cans tucked up against her tummy. “Uncle Jash says that it makes me too hyper.”

She held up a can that had a cutesy picture of Sawbones on the cover holding hands with a blonde-haired Bonesaw over an indistinct pile of bodies. The entire can was covered in garish, neon colours that practically glowed. “Oh, it’s candy flavoured!”

She popped the tab and downed the drink like an alcoholic that had had a long, hard day. She lowered the can with a gasp, a huge smile plastered across her face while neon pink juice stained the corners of her lips. “So sweet!”

“Sure,” Lilly said. She went to take a sip of her own drink then paused. Eating or drinking while next to the homicidal biotinker was probably against a regulation somewhere.

“So, what are we talking about?” Bonesaw asked as she bounced on the spot and fluffed out her dress. “Is it something fun?”

“Simurgh, Queen Administrator, how they’re... themselves so much.”

“She’s a lot of fun,” Bonesaw said with a nod. “Both shes. Queen Administrator is super nice, and the Simurgh looks like she gives the best hugs. Did you see how fluffy her wings are? Do you know how they feel?”

“Soft,” Glory Girl admitted. She noticed the sudden attention on her and flushed red. “What? I was there, the Simurgh was there, she let me touch. It wasn’t weird or anything.”

“So was that before or after you started obsessing over your sister?” Vista asked.

“Shut up, it’s not like that!” Glory Girl said.

“Sister love?” Bonesaw asked. Her hands clasped together and her eyes sparkled as she looked up at Glory Girl. “Did you get hurt and she healed you? Was your heart broken as she fixed it and then you discovered that you love her? That’s so romantic!”

“Stop saying that! I’m, I’m not a lesbian,” Glory Girl said.

“So you’re saying that your love transcends concepts such as gender?” Bonesaw asked. She tilted her head to one side. “You know, if you find some guy around somewhere, I could turn you into a boy. I just need extra parts and a few hours.”

“Never gonna let you touch me, creep,” Vicky said with narrowed eyes and her body edging away from the smaller girl. Lilly could sympathise.

“Gonna have to put a rain check on that one,” Vista said. She was staring off towards the entrance and that had Lilly and the others doing the same. Legend was standing there, looking tall and proud as he surveyed the room, then he saw all the villains looking his way and his expression saddened a bit.

“Give me a hand,” Bonesaw asked after Lilly got up. She was making grabby motions. Lilly hesitated, but gave in and helped the girl to her feet while everyone else was preparing to do the same.

“You guys were a lot of fun to talk to, but I think we’ll have to cut it short for now,” Vista said. “Looks like the next bit’s going to start.

“Up on your feet everyone,” Legend said, his voice carrying. “The next part of the show is about to begin!”

***

Next time, on How to Train Your Endbringer, the second stage of the tournament.... Begins!

A big ol’ thank-you to all my patrons. This month was hard but they made it a whole lot more bearable.


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